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Uncle  Remus  and  his  friends 


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UNCLE  REMUS  RETURNS.     Illustrated. 
LITTLE     MR.    THIMBLEFINGER     AND     HIS 

QUEER   COUNTRY.      Illustrated  by  Oliver 

Herford. 
MR.   RABBIT  AT    HOME.      A  Sequel  to  Little 

Mr.   Thimblefinger  and    His   Queer   Country. 

Illustrated  by  Oliver  Herford. 

THE  STORY  OF  AARON  (SO-NAMED)  THE 
SON  OF  BEN  ALL  Told  by  his  Friends  and 
Acquaintances.  Illustrated  by  Oliver  Her- 
ford. 

AARON  IN  THE  WILDWOODS.  Illustrated  by 
Oliver  Herford. 

PLANTATION  PAGEANTS.  Illustrated  by  E. 
Boyd  Smith. 

NIGHTS  WITH  UNCLE  REMUS.     Illustrated. 

UNCLE  REMUS  AND  HIS  FRIENDS.  Illus- 
trated. 

MINGO,  AND  OTHER  SKETCHES  IN  BLACK 
AND  WHITE. 

BALAAM  AND  HIS  MASTER,  AND  OTHER 
SKETCHES. 

SISTER  JANE,  HER  FRIENDS  AND  AC- 
QUAINTANCES. A  Narrative  of  Certain 
Events  and  Episodes  transcribed  from  the 
Papers  of  the  late  William  Wornum. 

TALES  OF  THE  HOME  FOLKS  IN  PEACE 
AND  WAR.     Illustrated. 

HOUGHTON   MIFFLIN  COMPANY 
Boston  and  New  York 


SL 


UNCLE   REMUS  .  .  .  SNIFFING  THE  AIR.     Page  258. 


UNCLE  REMUS     * 
AND    HIS    FRIENDS 


OLD  PLANTATION  STORIES,  SONGS,  AND  BALLADS 
WITH  SKETCHES  OF  NEGRO  CHARACTER 


BY 


JOEL  CHANDLER  HARRIS 

AUTHOR    OF    "UNCLE    REMUS:     HIS    SONGS    AND    HIS    SAYINGS1 


ILLUSTRATED  BY  A.  B.  FROST 


BOSTON   AND   NEW   YORK 
HOUGHTON  MIFFLIN  COMPANY 


Copyright,  1892, 
By  JOEL  CHANDLER  HARRIS. 

All  rights  reserved. 


J 

3S8 


INTRODUCTION. 


A  genial  literary  critic,  of  Boston,  looking 
over  the  field  of  letters  in  this  republic  not 
many  months  ago,  felt  compelled  to  give  utter- 
ance to  a  note  of  depression.  What  he  saw 
was  pleasing,  perhaps,  but  not  inspiring.  The 
landscape  appeared  to  be  full  of  the  impotent 
commotion  that  is  seen  in  the  neighborhood 
of  ant-hills  just  before  a  shower.  Small  men 
were  trying  to  play  instruments  much  too  large 
for  them,  while  others  were  fiddling  away  with 
futile  earnestness  on  one  string.  To  crown 
all,  Provinciality,  with  an  amplitude  at  once 
motherly  and  American,  spread  her  homespun 
frock  over  the  scene.  There  was  nothing 
new,  nothing  hopeful,  and  even  those  who  had 
given  signs  of  promise  were  returning  to  bar- 
ren imitations  of  their  early  successes.     It  is 


IV  INTRODUCTION. 

even  so ;  and  hard  upon  the  heels  of  this 
critic's  complaint  follows  this  new  collection 
of  "  Plantation  Fables." 

The  stories  here  gathered  together  have 
been  caught  for  me  in  the  kitchen.  Some  of 
them  are  discoveries,  many  are  verifications  of 
stories  that  have  been  sent  me  by  friends,  and 
others  are  the  odds  and  ends  and  fragments 
from  my  note-books  which  I  have  been  able 
to  verify  and  complete.  This  work  of  verifi- 
cation and  putting  together  has  been  going 
on  since  1884,  but  not  in  any  definite  or  sys- 
tematic way.  There  has  been  a  general  under- 
standing in  my  household  for  a  dozen  years 
or  more  that  preference  was  to  be  given  in 
the  kitchen  to  a  cook  of  the  plantation  type, 
—  the  type  that  we  have  come  to  call  here 
the  "  old-timey "  negro.  Naturally,  it  has 
sometimes  happened  that  digestion  was  sacri- 
ficed to  sentiment,  but  the  special  result  is  to 
be  found  in  the  pages  that  follow.  There 
has  been  an  understanding,  too,  that  the 
youngsters  of  the  household,  possessing  the 
knack  that  nature  gives  to  youth,  were  to 
employ  all  their  arts  in  discovering  a  new  story, 


INTRODUCTION.  V 

or  in  verifying  one  already  in  hand.  A  plan 
was  finally  hit  upon  to  give  the  children  a  cue 
word  or  phrase  from  a  story  that  needed  veri- 
fication, or  from  an  interesting  fragment  that 
lacked  completion. 

In  one  instance  this  plan  had  a  singularly 
fertile  result.  The  cook  in  charge  had  a  son- 
in-law  named  John  Holder,  who  had  shown 
a  tendency  to  indulge  in  story-telling  in  his 
hours  of  ease.  This  was  in  1886.  Mr.  Richard 
Adams  Learned,  of  Newton,  Sussex  County, 
New  Jersey,  had  sent  me  the  story  about  the 
man  who,  with  his  two  dogs,  harassed  the 
wild  cattle.  (See  p.  91.)  One  of  the  young- 
sters was  told  to  ask  about  this  story,  and  his 
cue  was  "  a  man,  two  dogs,  and  the  wild  cat- 
tle." But  the  child's  memory  was  short.  He 
asked  about  a  boy  and  two  dogs,  and  the  result 
was  the  story  of  "  The  Little  Boy  and  his 
Dogs,"  to  be  found  in  the  supplementary  part 
of  "  Daddy  Jake,  the  Runaway  "  (page  76). 
Some  months  afterwards  the  child  remembered 
the  wild  cattle,  and  got  the  story  from  John 
Holder  substantially  as  it  had  been  sent  me  by 
Mr.  Learned.     The  variations  are  not  worth 


vi  INTRODUCTION. 

taking  into  account.  I  have  referred  to  this 
matter  because  it  has  been  made  interesting 
by  an  article  which  Mr.  David  Dwight  Wells 
contributes  to  the  "  Popular  Science  Monthly/' 
for  May,  1892.  Mr.  Wells  embodies  the  wild 
cattle  story,  which  differs  in  no  essential  par- 
ticular from  the  version  sent  me  by  Mr. 
Learned.  Mr.  Wells  had  the  story  from  a 
gentleman  who  was  born  about  the  beginning 
of  this  century  in  Essequibo,  British  Guiana, 
South  America.  The  story  was  told  to  Mr. 
Learned  by  his  grandfather  (born  in  1802), 
who  had  it  from  his  old  "  mammy  "  nurse  in 
Demarara.  In  John  Holder's  story  the  names 
of  the  dogs  are  changed  to  Minny-minny- 
morack  and  Follamalinska ;  in  Mr.  Learned's 
story  the  names  are  Yarmearoo  and  Genga- 
maroto ;  in  Mr.  Wells's,  Ya-me-o-ro  and  Cen- 
ga-mo-ro-to.  The  Georgia  negro  had  the 
story  pat,  and  out  of  it  grew  the  tale  of  the 
"Bull  that  went  a-courting"  (see  p.  81), 
which  the  wild  cattle  story  seems  to  be  the 
sequel  of.  Thus  we  have  a  series  that  ought 
to  be  of  some  interest  to  students  of  folk-lore. 
But  the  folk-lore  branch  of  the  subject  I 


INTBODUCTION.  vii 

gladly  leave  to  those  who  think  they  know 
something  about  it.  My  own  utter  ignorance 
I  confess  without  a  pang.  To  know  that  you 
are  ignorant  is  a  valuable  form  of  knowledge, 
and  I  am  gradually  accumulating  a  vast  store 
of  it.  In  the  light  of  this  knowledge,  the 
enterprising  inconsequence  of  the  Introduction 
to  "  Nights  with  Uncle  Remus  "  is  worth  not- 
ing on  account  of  its  unconscious  and  harm- 
less humor.  I  knew  a  good  deal  more  about 
comparative  folk-lore  then  than  I  know  now ; 
and  the  whole  affair  is  carried  off  with  remark- 
able gravity.  Since  that  Introduction  was 
written,  I  have  gone  far  enough  into  the  sub- 
ject (by  the  aid  of  those  who  are  Fellows  of 
This  and  Professors  of  That,  to  say  nothing 
of  Doctors  of  the  Other)  to  discover  that  at 
the  end  of  investigation  and  discussion  Specu- 
lation stands  grinning. 

The  stories  in  this  volume  were  written 
simply  and  solely  because  of  my  interest  in 
the  stories  themselves,  in  the  first  place,  and, 
in  the  second  place,  because  of  the  unadulter- 
ated human  nature  that  might  be  found  in 
them.     As  I  wrote  them  with  my  own  children 


Vin  INTRODUCTION. 

around  me,  or  with  their  voices  sounding  not 
far  away,  I  seemed  to  see  other  children  laugh- 
ing as  the  homely  stories  were  read  to  them ; 
I  seemed  to  see  gray-haired  children  smiling,  if 
they  found  here,  close  to  the  earth,  a  stroke  of 
simplicity  ringing  true  to  life ;  and  it  seemed 
to  me  that  these  visions,  vain  though  they 
might  be,  were  more  promising  than  a  hope- 
less journey  through  the  wilderness  to  discover 
at  what  place  and  at  what  hour  the  tribes  of 
the  mountains  and  the  citizens  of  the  plains 
shook  their  hairy  fists  at  each  other,  and  went 
jabbering  their  several  ways. 

Naturally,  these  stories  are  written  in  what 
is  called  the  negro  dialect.  It  seemed  to  be 
unavoidable.  I  sympathize  deeply  and  heartily 
with  the  protest  that  has  been  made  against  the 
abuse  of  dialect.  It  is  painful,  indeed,  when 
the  form  of  the  lingo  trails  on  the  earth  and 
the  thought  flies  in  the  air.  I  had  intended 
to  apologize  for  the  plantation  dialect,  but  a 
valued  correspondent  in  "  The  Flatwoods " 
assures  me  that  "  old  man  Chaucer  was  one 
of  the  earliest  dialect  writers,"  and  I  have  re- 
cently seen  (in  the  New  York  "  Independent ") 


INTRODUCTION.  IX 

an  essay  by  Professor  March,  in  which  there 
is  a  perfectly  serious  effort  to  rival  the  pho- 
netics employed  by  Uncle  Remus. 

The  student  of  English,  if  he  be  willing  to 
search  so  near  the  ground,  will  find  matter  to 
interest  him  in  the  homely  dialect  of  Uncle 
Remus,  and  if  his  intentions  run  towards 
philological  investigation,  he  will  pause  before 
he  has  gone  far  and  ask  himself  whether  this 
negro  dialect  is  what  it  purports  to  be,  or 
whether  it  is  not  simply  the  language  of  the 
white  people  of  three  hundred  years  ago 
twisted  and  modified  a  little  to  fit  the  lingual 
peculiarities  of  the  negro.  Dozens  of  words, 
such  as  hit  for  it,  ax  for  ask,  whiles  for  while, 
and  heap  for  a  large  number  of  people,  will 
open  before  him  the  whole  field  of  the  phi- 
lology of  the  English  tongue.  He  will  dis- 
cover that,  when  Uncle  Remus  tells  the  little 
boy  that  he  has  "  a  monstus  weakness  fer 
cake  what 's  got  reezins  in  it,"  the  pronun- 
ciation of  reezins  uncovers  and  rescues  from 
oblivion  Shakespeare's  pun  on  raisins,  where 
Falstaff  tells  the  Prince,  "  If  reasons  were  as 
plentiful  as  blackberries,  I  would  give  no  man 
a  reason  on  compulsion,  I." 


X  INTRODUCTION. 

After  all,  this  is  a  tremendous  apology  to 
make  for  the  humble  speech  of  Uncle  Remus, 
yet  it  has  delayed  for  a  moment  the  announce- 
ment that  the  old  man  will  bother  the  public  no 
more  with  his  whimsical  stories.  I  have  hesi- 
tated a  little  over  it.  Uncle  Remus  has  found 
out  for  me  many  friends  in  all  parts  of  the 
world.  Thousands  of  people  whom  I  shall  never 
meet,  thousands  of  little  children  whom  I  shall 
never  see,  have  sent  me  the  most  precious  to- 
kens of  their  appreciation.  It  is  not  an  easy 
nor  a  pleasing  ceremony  to  step  from  behind 
the  curtain,  pretending  to  smile  and  say  a  brief 
good-by  for  Uncle  Remus  to  those  who  have 
been  so  free  with  their  friendly  applause.  No 
doubt  there  is  small  excuse  for  such  a  leave- 
taking  in  literature.  But  there  is  no  pretense 
that  the  old  darkey's  poor  little  stories  are  in 
the  nature  of  literature,  or  that  their  re-telling 
touches  literary  art  at  any  point.  All  the 
accessories  are  lacking.  There  is  nothing  here 
but  an  old  negro  man,  a  little  boy,  and  a  dull 
reporter,  the  matter  of  discourse  being  fan- 
tasies as  uncouth  as  the  original  man  ever 
conceived  of.     Therefore,  let  Uncle  Remus's 


INTRODUCTION.  xi 

good-by  be  as  simple  as  his  stories ;  a  swift 
gesture  that  might  be  mistaken  for  a  saluta- 
tion as  he  takes  his  place  among  the  affable 
Ghosts  that  throng  the  ample  corridors  of  the 
Temple  of  Dreams. 

J.  C.  H. 

Atlanta,  Georgia 


CONTENT* 


UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

I.  Why  the  Hawk  catches  Chickens   .        .  3 

II.  Brother  Bear  and  the  Honey  Orchard  12 

III.  Brother  Rabbit  has  Fun  at  the  Ferry  24 

IV.  Death  and  the  Negro  Man  ...  34 
V.  Where  the  Harrycane  comes  from         .  39 

VI.  Why  Brother  Wolf  did  n*t  eat  the  Lit- 
tle Rabbits 45 

VII.  Mrs.  Partridge  has  a  Fit  .        .        .64 
VIII.   Brother  Fox  "smells  Smoke"       .        .        60 
IX.   Brother  Fox  still  in  Trouble         .        .    69 
X.  Why  Brother  Fox's  Legs  are  Black  .        77 
XI.  Why  Brother  Bull  Growls  and  Grum- 
bles             .        .        .81 

XII.   The  Man  and  the  Wild  Cattle  .         .        91 
XIII.  Brother  Rabbit    frightens  Brother  Ti- 
ger       101 

JQV.  Brother  Billy  Goat  eats  his  Dinner  .      112 

XV.  The  King  that  talked  biggity         .        .  118 

XVI.  Brother  Rabbit's  Money  Mint     .        .      122 


xiv  CONTENTS. 

XVII.  Why  the  Moon's  Face  is  Smutty     .        .  130 
XVIII.   Brother      Rabbit     conquers      Brother 

Lion 134 

XIX.  "  Heyo,  House  ! " 142 

XX.  According  to  how  the  Drop  Falls       .      147 
XXI.  A  Fool  for  Luck  .        .        .        .        .  154 

XXII.  The  Man  and  his  Boots.        .        .        .160 

XXIII.  Brother  Mud  Turtle's  Trickery     .        .  167 

XXIV.  How  the  King  recruited  his  Army     .      176 

HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 


I. 

The  Plough-Hands'  Song   . 

. 

.  193 

II. 

A  Song  of  the  Mole 

. 

.      195 

III. 

"  Oh,  gimme  de  Gal  ! " 

•       « 

.  196 

IV. 

Christmas  Dance  Song    . 

.       . 

.      197 

V. 

"  Dem  Lam's  a-cryin'  !  " 

.  199 

VI. 

"  Run,  Nigger,  run  V*      . 

. 

.      200 

VII. 

Corn-Shucking  Song 

•       i 

.  201 

VIII. 

Oh,  July  !    Dis  Long  Time  ! 

.       . 

.      202 

IX. 

Walk-a  Chalk 

.  204 

X. 

"Come  along,  True  Believer!"    . 

.      204 

XL 

A  Negro  Love  Song    . 

.  206 

XII. 

"De  ol'  Sheep  sharp"     . 

t       • 

.      207 

XIII. 

Ring  dem  Charmin'  Bells  . 

♦ 

.  210 

XIV. 

Hog-Feeder's  Song  . 

•       » 

.      212 

XV. 

Nursery  Song       .        .       • 

.  213 

XVI. 

My  Honey,  my  Love        • 

•       • 

•      215 

CONTENTS.  xt 


HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

I.   Uncle  Remus  at  the  Telephone       .  .  219 

II.    Uncle  Remus  receives  a  Valentine  .  225 

III.  "Miss  Sally"  and  the  Tree  Man  .      231 

IV.  Intimidation  of  a  Colored  Voter    .  .  238 
V.  A  Story  of  a  Blind  Horse    .        .  .      243 

VI.  Uncle  Remus  in  Limbo       ....  248 

VII.  Uncle  Remus  thinks  he  finds  a  Snake      254 

VIII.  Uncle  Remus  and  the  Comet    .        .        .  261 

IX.  Some  Advice  to  a  Colored  Brother    .      266 

X.  Preaching  that  is  Preaching,  and  Uncle 

Remus's  Comments  on  it  .        .        .        .  271 

XL  Called  to  Account  by  the  Preacher  .      279 

XII.  Uncle  Remus's  Experience  with  "  Ha'nts  "  284 

XIII.  A  Queer    Experience  with  the  Phono- 

graph               .        .292 

XIV.  A  Case  of  the  Grippe         ....  301 
XV.  Uncle  Remus's  Ideas  of  Conjuring      .      308 

XVI.  Views  on  the  African  Exodus          .        .  315 
XVII.  Uncle  Remus  on  an  Electric  Car       .      324 
XVIII.   William  Henry  at  School        .        .        .  330 
XIX.  Uncle  Remus's  Grandson  gets  into  Seri- 
ous Trouble 339 

XX.  The  Experience  of  William   Henry  as 

a  Farmer   346 

XXI.  The  Georgia  Watermelon      .        .       .      351 


LIST  OF  ILLUSTRATIONS. 


PAUB 

"  Uncle   Remus  .  .  .  sniffing  the   air  "    Frontispiece. 
"  Brer  B'ar  tied  hard  en  fas'  "     .        .        .        .22 

"Go  on,  Brer  B'ar—  go  on!"     ....        28 

"Lemme  tas'e,  daddy!"     .        .        .        .        .        .50 

"Brer  Fox  fetch  a  squall"        ....        72 

"  Billybaloo-bal!  " 84 

"  Brer  Rabbit  .  .  .  a-laughin'  fit  ter  kill  "  .  104 
"you  too  much  fer  me,  brer  rabbit  "  .  .  126 
"Brer  Lion  showed  his  tushes"         .        .       .      140 

"He  ax  Brer  Fox  pardon" 170 

"Oh,  gimme  de  gal" 196 

•  I  'M  SHOLY  GWINE  TER  BREAK  SUMP'N "     .  •  .  294 


UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE 
BOY. 


UNCLE   REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE 
BOY. 


WHY   THE    HAWK   CATCHES    CHICKENS. 

One  day,  Uncle  Remus  sat  in  the  sun  mak- 
ing a  fish  basket.  The  little  boy  watched 
him  weave  the  white  oak  splits  together  a 
long  time,  waiting  for  a  story.  Finally  a  ban- 
tam rooster,  wandering  near,  crowed  shrilly 
three  or  four  times.  The  noise  broke  the 
silence  so  unexpectedly  that  Uncle  Remus 
jumped  nervously,  and  then  hurled  the  un- 
finished basket  at  the  rooster,  which  ran  away 
screaming  and  cackling.  The  rooster  be- 
longed to  the  little  boy,  and  was  a  favorite 
pet,  but  the  youngster  laughed  heartily  at 
Uncle  Remus's  irritation,  which  was  partly 
real  and  partly  affected. 

"  Nummine  !  "  exclaimed  the  old  man,  re- 
covering his  basket,  "  what  fattens  de  chickens 
fattens  de  hawk." 


4  UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Now,  Uncle  Remus,"  the  child  protested, 
not  catching  the  meaning  of  the  homely 
proverb,  "  you  know  hawks  don't  eat  corn 
and  dough,  and  worms  and  bugs." 

"No,  dey  don't,"  responded  the  old  man  em- 
phatically. "  Ef  dey  did,  dat  ar  bantin  chicken 
mought  live  ter  git  gray.  Mos'  eve'y  mornin' 
der's  a  big  hawk  sailin'  'roun'  here,  en  he  '11 
sholy  git  dat  ar  uppity  little  rooster.  You 
better  have  'im  put  in  de  pot  now.  I  bin 
noticin'  deze  many  odd-come-shorts  dat  hawks 
is  got  a  spite  at  roosters,  speshually  when  dey 
ain't  too  big  fer  um  ter  tote  off.  Dey  wuz  a 
time  when  de  hawks  ain't  had  no  mouf  fer 
chicken,  but  dat  time  done  gone  by." 

"  Did  n't  the  hawks  always  catch  chickens, 
Uncle  Remus  ?  "  asked  the  little  boy. 

"  Sholy  I  done  tell  you  'bout  dat,"  the  old 
man  remarked,  looking  at  the  child  with  a 
great  affectation  of  astonishment.  "  Now  den, 
—  rack  yo'  brain,  en  tell  me  ef  I  ain't  done 
tol'  you  how  come  de  hawk  fer  ter  be  constant 
a-huntin'  chickens  en  flyin'  off  wid  um." 

The  little  boy  thought  the  matter  over, 
and  then  shook  his  head.  He  did  n't  know 
whether  to  make  a  vigorous  denial  or  to  say 
nothing.  So  he  compromised  by  shaking  his 
head. 


WHY  THE  HAWK  CATCHES  CHICKENS.         5 

"  Well !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus,  "  ef  dat 
don't  bang  my  time,  Joe  's  dead  an'  Sal 's  a 
widder.  You  '11  wake  up  some  er  deze  fine 
mornin's  en  hear  yo'  mammy  laugh  en  say  she 
got  a  mighty  big  load  off'n  her  min'  kaze  dey 
done  sont  oF  man  Remus  ter  de  'sylum.  En  I 
ain't  never  been  tell  you  dat  ?  Hit 's  in  about 
de  fus'  tale  I  hear  my  grandaddy  tell.  I  mos' 
shame  ter  go  back  en  pick  it  up  now." 

The  little  boy  said  nothing,  but  sat  in  an 
expectant  attitude.  The  old  man  gathered 
together  a  dozen  or  more  splits,  placed  them 
where  they  would  be  in  reach,  and  then  be- 
gan: — 

"  'T  ain't  no  use  ter  tell  you  nothin'  't  all 
'bout  how  hawks  does  now.  Dey  er  done 
broke  in  ter  ketchin'  chickens  —  de  goshawk, 
de  swamphawk  en  de  bluedarter,  de  forky 
tail  en  de  fan  tail,  —  all  un  um.  But  way 
back  yonder  dey  ain't  know  nothin'  't  all  'bout 
no  chicken,  kaze  dey  ain't  had  de  tas'e  un  um. 
I  dunner  what  dey  did  eat,  but  I  hear  tell  dat 
times  got  so  hard  wid  ole  Brer  Hawk  dat  he 
had  ter  scuffle  'roun'  right  smartually.  Yit  it 
seem  like  scufflin'  ain't  do  no  good.  He  fly 
dis  away,  en  he  fly  dat,  yet  he  ain't  fin'  nothin' 
fer  ter  eat,  en  it  look  like  hit  'uz  gwine  ter  be 


6         UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

all-night-Isom  wi'd  'im.  Whiles  he  wuz  flyin' 
roun',  he  seed  de  Sun  shinin'  up  dar  in  de 
elements,  so  he  bowed  his  head  en  say, 
'  Howdy/  En  de  Sun  he  howdied  back,  he  did, 
en  dey  struck  up  a  kinder  speakin'  'quaintance. 

"  Bimeby,  Brer  Hawk  made  so  bol'  ez  ter 
tell  de  Sun  'bout  de  trouble  w'at  he  got,  en  so 
de  Sun,  he  up'n  'low,  he  did,  dat  ef  Brer  Hawk 
kin  ketch  'im  in  bed,  he  '11  gi'  'im  all  de  vit- 
tles  he  kin  eat  en  show  'im  whar  ter  git  mo.' " 

"Catch  the  Sun  in  bed,  Uncle  Kemus?" 
asked  the  little  boy. 

"  Dat  what  I  said,  honey.  Ef  Brer  Hawk 
kin  ketch  de  Sun  in  bed,  den  de  Sun  say  he 
willin'  fer  ter  show  Brer  Hawk  whar  ter  git 
his  vittles.  Dis  make  mo'  trouble  fer  Brer 
Hawk.  He  got  up  sooner  en  sooner  eve'y 
mornin',  but  eve'y  time  he  lay  eyes  on  de  Sun, 
he  wuz  up  en  a-shinin'.  Den  he  sot  up  all 
night,  but  dat  ain't  make  no  drffunce.  He 
can't  ketch  de  Sun  in  bed.  Hit  went  on  dis 
away  twel  Brer  Hawk  git  so  weak  he  kin 
skacely  ruffle  a  fedder.  He  got  dat  poor  en 
light  dat  he  can't  fly  ag'in  de  win'  nohow,  en 
den  he  des  natchally  gun  out. 

"  He  'uz  hoppin  'bout  in  de  top  uv  a  great 
big  pine  when  he  hear  Brer  Rooster  callin' 


WHY  THE  HAWK  CATCHES  CHICKENS.         7 

'im.  He  tuck  a  notion  dat  Brer  Rooster  wuz 
des  makin'  game  un  'im,  so  he  holler  back, 
sezee :  — 

u '  Don't  bodder  'long  er  me,  Brer  Rooster. 
Scratch  up  yo'  little  grub  woims  en  cackle 
over  urn,  en  eat  urn,  but  don't  pester  'long  er 
me.' 

"  Brer  Rooster  holler  back,  sezee :  — 

" '  What  de  matter  wid  you  ?  How  come 
you  look  so  pale?  How  come  you  look  so 
lonesome  ? ' 

Uncle  Remus  made  each  question  as  near 
as  possible  an  imitation  of  the  crowing  of 
a  rooster,  which  amused  the  little  boy  very 
much. 

"Well,"  the  old  man  continued,  "atter 
while  Brer  Hawk  drapped  down  en  sot  on  de 
fence,  whar  he  kin  talk  ter  Brer  Rooster,  kaze 
he  so  hongry  it  make  his  tongue  weak.  He 
sot  dar  on  de  fence,  he  did,  en  up'n  tol'  Brer 
Rooster  'bout  how  he  been  tryin'  f er  ter  ketch 
de  Sun  in  bed.  Dis  make  Brer  Rooster  laugh 
twel  you  mought  er  heerd  'im  squall  all  over 
de  hoss  lot.     He  'low,  sezee  :  — 

" i  Massy,  massy  !  Why  n't  you  tell  me  ? 
Why  n't  you  tell  me  long  ago  ? ' 

"  Wid  dat,  Brer  Rooster  up'n  say,  sezee,  dat 


8         UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

dey  ain't  no  mornin'  but  what  he  kin  ketch  de 
Sun  in  bed,  en  he  tell  Brer  Hawk  dat  ef  he  '11 
des  come  en  roos'  some'rs  close  by,  he  kin 
ketch  de  Sun  de  ve'y  nex'  mornin'.  Brer 
Rooster  say,  sezee,  dat  when  he  clap  his  wing 
en  crow,  den  de  time  done  come  fer  Brer 
Hawk  ter  start  off  fer  ter  ketch  de  Sun  in 
bed. 

"  Well,  den,  ole  Brer  Hawk  look  like  he 
mighty  thankful.  He  bowed  his  head,  he  did, 
en  look  des  ez  nice  ez  a  nigger  does  when  you 
gi'  'im  biscuit  en  gravy ;  en  he  say  he  gwine 
stay  ez  close  ter  Brer  Rooster  ez  he  kin 
scrouge.  Brer  Rooster,  he  sorter  cluck  down 
in  his  goozle,  en  'low,  sezee  :  — 

" i  Git  des  ez  close  ez  you  please,  Brer 
Hawk,  but  don't  hunch  me.  I  'm  mighty 
nervious  in  my  sleep,  en  ef  you  hunch  me 
endurin  er  de  night,  der  's  bleedz  ter  be 
trouble.' 

"  Ole  Brer  Hawk,  he  say,  sezee :  — 

" '  I  ain't  a  tetchous  man  myse'f,  Brer 
Rooster,  yit  I  speck  I  got  manners  nuff  not 
ter  pester  dem  what  is.' 

"  Dey  sot  dar  on  de  roos',  dey  did,  des  like 
two  bluebirds  on  a  fence  post,  en  ef  dey  wuz 
any  fuss  made  it  wuz  when  ole  Dominicker  hen 


WHY  THE  HAWK  CATCHES  CHICKENS.  9 

drenip  'bout  little  Billy  Black  Mink,  en  hol- 
ler'd  out  in  'er  sleep.  Dey  sot  dar,  dey  did, 
en  nodded  right  along.  Bimeby,  'bout  er 
nour  'fo'  day,  Brer  Rooster  woke  up,  en  clap 
his  wings  en  holler  :  — 

" c  Now  yo'  time  ter  go  ! '  Den  he  wait  lit- 
tle, en  holler  n'er  time  :  6  Now  yo'  time  ter 
go!' 

"  Wid  dat,  Brer  Hawk  riz  en  flew,  en  he 
flewd  so  fas'  en  he  flewd  so  fur  dat  he  come 
ter  de  place  whar  de  Sun  live  at,  en  he  cotch 
de  Sun  in  bed." 

"The  Sun  in  bed,  Uncle  Remus?"  ex- 
claimed the  little  boy. 

"  In  bed ! "  responded  the  old  man,  with 
unusual  emphasis,  "  right  dar  in  bed.  En 
't  want  no  trundle  bed  needer.  It  wuz  one  er 
deze  yer  big  beds  wid  high  posties.  Yasser  ! 
De  Sun  wuz  in  dar,  en  he  had  de  bed  kivver 
all  drawd  up  'roun'  his  head,  en  he  'uz  snorin' 
same  ez  somebody  filin'  a  cowhorn.  Brer 
Hawk  rapped  on  de  head-board,  en  holler  out, 
sezee  :  — 

"  '  Mos'  time  fer  day  ter  break !  Git  up 
fum  dar  !  Brek'us  '11  be  mighty  late  ef  you 
lay  dar  all  day  ! ' 

"Sun  'low,  <  Who  dat?' 


10       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

ei  Brer  Hawk  say,  '  'T  ain't  nobody  but  me.' 

"  Sun  'low,  '  What  you  wanter  come  wakin' 
me  up  f  er  ?  I  boun'  I  '11  have  de  headache  de 
whole  blessid  day.' 

"  Den  Brer  Hawk  put  de  Sun  in  min'  er  de 
promise  what  he  made.  Den  de  Sun  got  mad. 
He  'low,  sezee  :  — 

"  '  How  you  speck  I  gwine  fin'  you  in  vit- 
tles ?     Who  show  you  de  way  ter  my  bed  ? ' 

"  Brer  Hawk  say  it  'uz  Brer  Rooster.  Den 
de  Sun  raise  up  in  bed,  he  did,  en  wink  one 
eye,  en  'low,  sezee  :  — 

" ( Go  back  dar  en  tell  yo'  Brer  Rooster  dat 
he  got  to  fin'  you  in  vittles.' 

"Brer  Hawk  ain't  like  dis  much,  en  he 
sorter  hung  'roun',  like  he  waitin'  fer  sumpin. 
Dis  make  de  Sun  mad,  en  he  jump  out  er  bed 
en  run  Brer  Hawk  out'n  de  house  wid  de 
poker.  Brer  Hawk  ain't  know  what  to  do. 
He  flewd  back  ter  whar  Brer  Rooster  wuz 
scratchin'  in  de  trash  pile,  en  tole  'im  what  de 
Sun  say.  Dis  make  Brer  Rooster  laugh.  He 
'low,  sezee :  — 

" '  How  I  gwine  ter  fin'  you  in  vittles  ?  I 
got  a  mighty  big  fambly  ter  look  atter,  en  I 
be  bless  ef  dey  don't  git  hongrier  en  hongrier 
eve'y  day  dat  comes.' 


WHY  THE  HAWK  CATCHES  CHICKENS.        11 

"  Brer  Hawk  'low,  '  I  bleedz  ter  eat,  Brer 
Rooster,  en  I  'm  lots  hongrier  dan  what  yo' 
fambly  is.' 

"  Brer  Rooster  'low,  sezee :  '  Well,  Brer 
Hawk,  you  'er  mo'  dan  welcome  ter  drap  down 
here  en  scratch  in  de  trash.  I  speck  yo'  claws 
des  ez  good  ez  what  min'  is.  'Sides  dat,  you 
ain't  bleedz  ter  holler  en  cackle  eve'y  time  you 
fine  a  woim.' 

"But  Brer  Hawk  shake  his  head.  Dat 
kinder  doin's  don't  nigh  suit  'im.  Hit  look 
too  much  like  work.  So  he  sail  up  in  de  tree- 
top,  en  sot  dar,  en  bimeby  here  come  ole  Miss 
Hen  wid  'er  chickens,  which  dey  let  in  ter 
scratchin'  'longside  Brer  Rooster.  Brer  Hawk 
look  at  um,  en  he  ax  hisse'f ,  sezee  :  '  What 
make  my  mouf  water  ? '  Den  he  'membered 
'bout  how  de  Sun  wunk  at  'im,  en  it  come 
'cross  his  min'  dat  chicken  meat  mought  tas'e 
good.  Wid  dat  he  drapped  down  on  one  er 
Brer  Rooster's  chilluns,  en  kyard  it  off,  en  it 
fit  his  appetite  so  mighty  well  dat  he  been 
eatin'  Brer  Rooster's  fambly  eve'y  chance  he 

git." 

Uncle  Remus  paused  to  trim  and  smooth 
the  end  of  a  split.     Then  he  said  :  — 

"  Brer  Hawk  hongry  yit.  You  better  watch 
out  fer  yo'  bantin'." 


It. 

BROTHER  BEAR  AND  THE  HONEY  ORCHARD. 

One  day  while  Uncle  Remus  was  oiling  the 
harness  in  the  carriage-house,  he  heard  the  lit- 
tle boy's  baby  brother  crying,  and  went  out  to 
investigate  the  matter.  He  soon  discovered 
that  the  baby  was  crying  for  a  piece  of  cake 
which  the  little  boy  held  in  his  hand,  and  re- 
fused to  give  up.  The  old  man  stood  watch- 
ing long  enough  for  the  little  boy  to  see  him, 
whereupon  he  exclaimed  solemnly,  "  Laws  a 
massy ! "  Then  he  shook  his  head  solemnly 
from  side  to  side,  and  returned  to  the  carriage- 
house.  It  was  not  long  before  the  little  boy 
followed  him  there.  Uncle  Remus  pretended 
not  to  notice  the  youngster's  presence,  and 
began  to  talk  to  himself. 

"  I  done,  put  it  down  in  my  min'  long  time 
ago  dat  stingy  folks  ain't  gwine  ter  come  ter 
no  good  een.  I  done  seed  too  much  un  it. 
Dar  wuz  ol'  man  Dickerson  —  he  save  money 
en  save  money;    he  pinch  here  en  he  pinch 


THE  HONEY  ORCHARD.  13 

dar,  en  he  so  stingy  he  won't  buy  him  a  dram 
skacely.  En  de  gracious  en  de  goodness ! 
What  good  do  it  do  'im?  He  sot  dar  in  de 
house  too  stingy  to  scratch  hisse'f  right  hard, 
en  swivel  up  en  die,  en  now  dem  ar  chillun  er 
his'n  is  flingin'  it  fur  en  wide.  Shoo  !  When 
it  come  ter  stingy  folks,  take  em  'way  fum 
me!  Don't  lemme  come  nigh  um !  I  done 
see  too  much  un  um." 

"  Well,  Uncle  Remus  "  —  began  the  little 
boy,  but  the  old  man  interrupted,  — 

"  Heyo,  dar  !  Dat  you  ?  Why  n't  you 
stay  out  dar  en  feed  dat  ar  baby  some  mo'  ?  " 

"  Well,  Uncle  Remus,  I  had  a  piece  of  cake 
for  you,  and  the  baby  saw  it  and  cried  for  it, 
and  I  did  n't  want  him  to  have  it.  He  gets 
everything,  anyhow." 

"  What  dat  in  yo'  pocket  ?  "  asked  the  old 
man. 

"  Well,  that 's  my  piece  of  cake." 

"  Den  why  n't  you  gi'  de  baby  my  piece,  en 
den  fetch  me  yone  ?  " 

"  Then  I  would  n't  have  had  any." 

"I  speck  dat's  so,"  said  Uncle  Remus, 
thoughtfully.  "  Maybe  de  cake  mought  er 
flung  de  baby  in  a  spasm,  en  den  I'd  a  had 
ter  got  on  a  hoss  en  gallop  atter  de  docter,  en 


14       tTNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

de  hoss  mought  er  stumbled  en  broke  my 
neck,  en  den  deze  yer  triflin'  good-f er-nothin5 
niggers  roun'  de  house  would  'a'  had  a  big 
jollification. 

"  En  yit,"  the  old  man  went  on,  slowly  eat- 
ing the  cake  from  the  little  boy's  hand,  "I 
'spizes  ter  see  stinginess.  Hit  put  me  in  min' 
er  ol'  Brer  B'ar  en  de  honey  orchard.  Ef  I 
ain't  done  tole  you  dat  tale,  I  'd  like  ter  know 
de  reason  why,  kaze  it  all  de  time  a  poppin'  in 
my  head." 

The  little  boy  was  very,  very  sure  he  had 
never  heard  of  the  honey  orchard  before. 

"  "Well,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  dey  wuz  one 
time  when  mos'  all  de  creeters,  horn,  claw,  en 
wing,  live  in  de  same  settlement.  Dey  'd  have 
some  fusses,  but  dey  ain't  had  no  f allin'  out, 
en  dey  wuz  livin'  des  ez  satisfactual  ez  what 
folks  does.  Times  wuz  mighty  hard,  en  't  wuz 
in  about  all  dey  kin  do  fer  ter  scuffle  'long  en 
make  buckle  en  tongue  meet.  Rake  en  scrape 
ez  dey  would,  some  un  um  'ud  hatter  go  ter 
bed  hongry.  Yit  dey  took  notice  er  one  thing, 
dat  whiles  all  un  um  wuz  gittin'  po'  en  po'er, 
ole  Brer  B'ar  wuz  gittin'  fatter  en  fatter. 
Whiles  de  t'er  creeturs'  ribs  wuz  stan'in'  out 
like  bar'l  hoops,  Brer  B'ar  wuz  slick  en  roun' 


THE  HONEY  ORCHARD.  15 

ez  a  butter  ball.  He  des  waller'd  in  fat ;  he 
wuz  too  fat  ter  keep  de  flies  off'n  hisse'f . 

"  Dey  all  study  en  study  how  Brer  B'ar  kin 
keep  so  fat  when  times  is  so  hard.  Brer  Bab- 
bit made  up  his  min'  dat  he  gwine  ter  git  at 
de  bottom  er  de  matter,  an'  so  he  keep  his  eye 
on  Brer  B'ar.  He  watch  'im,  he  did,  en 't  wan't 
long  'fo'  he  seed  dat  Brer  B'ar  wuz  doin' 
mighty  quare.  Stidder  settin'  up  late  en 
talkin'  politics,  he  'd  go  ter  bed  wid  de  chick- 
ens, en  by  good  daylight  he  'd  be  up  en  gone. 
Dis  bodder  Brer  Rabbit  might'ly.  He  got  so 
pester'd  en  fretted  dat  many  's  de  time  when 
he  'd  be  gwine'  long  de  road  he  'd  squat  right 
flat  on  de  groun'  en  scratch  his  head  en 
study. 

"Brer  Rabbit  had  done  got  de  knack  er 
settin'  up  all  night  en  sleepin'  late  in  de  day, 
but  bimeby,  one  night  he  tuck'n  pay  Brer  B'ar 
a  visit  f er  to  see  what  he  kin  fin'  out.  He  got 
ter  de  door,  he  did,  en  scrape  his  foot  on  de 
step  en  sorter  cle'r  up  his  th'oat.  Ole  Miss 
B'ar,  she  come  out  on  de  porch  fer  ter  see  who 
't  is,  en  she  uz  monst'us  perlite.  She  howdied 
wid  Brer  Rabbit,  en  ax  'im  ef  he  won't  come 
in  en  take  off  his  things  en  set  awhile  wid  um. 
Brer  Rabbit  say  he  don't  keer  ef  he  do,  bein'  's 


16      UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

how  he  ain't  seed  urn  all  in  so  long,  en  ole  Miss 
B'ar,  she  rustle  roun'  en  fotch  a  cheer,  en  ax 
Brer  Rabbit  fer  ter  make  hisse'f  at  home. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  cross  his  legs,  he  did,  en  'low 
dat  he  ain't  seed  Brer  B'ar  in  a  coon's  age ;  en 
Miss  B'ar,  she  fan  herse'f  wid  a  turkey-tail  fan? 
en  'low  dat  times  so  hard  her  ole  man  hatter 
work  soon  en  late  fer  ter  make  bofe  eens  meet. 
Den  she  skusen  herse'f,  en  say  she  got  ter  go 
right  now  en  fix  a  bag  er  ashes  fer  'im  ter  take 
ter  work  wid  'im  in  de  mornin'. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  ax  what  in  de  name  er  good- 
ness Brer  B'ar  do  wid  a  bag  er  ashes,  en  ole 
Miss  B'ar  laugh  en  say  she  dunner  what  on 
top  side  er  yeth  he  do  wid  um,  but  she  speck 
hit 's  des  one  er  his  notions. 

"  Ole  Miss  B'ar  work  her  fan  twel  it  fair 
flutter,  en  she  'low,  c  Goodness  knows,  dat  ole 
bag  er  ashes  is  done  'casion  me  mo'  trouble 
dan  it  wuth.  But  you  know  how  men  folks 
is,  Brer  Rabbit,  dey  '11  have  der  way  ef  it 's 
de  las'  ac'.  What  my  ole  man  want  wid  a 
bag  er  ashes  eve'y  mornin'  is  mo'n  I  kin  tell 
you,  but  have  um  he  will,  spite  er  all  creation. 
Dey  got  ter  be  out  dar  by  de  chimbley  cornder 
so  he  kin  git  um  when  he  start  ter  work.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  Whar  Brer  B'ar  now  ? 
I  ain't  hear  'im  in  dar.' 


THE  HONEY  ORCHARD.  17 

"  Ole  Miss  B'ar  laugh  twel  she  bent  over 
She  'low,  '  You  ain't  gwine  ter  hear  'im  nuther^ 
Brer  Babbit,  'less  you  happen  ter  hear  him 
sno'.  Sleep  !  I  ain't  never  is  see  nobody 
what  kin  sleep  like  my  ole  man.  He  ain't 
take  time  ter  eat,  skacely,  'fo'  he  's  ready  fer 
de  bed,  en  he  don't  mo'  'n  strike  de  bed  'fo' 
he  's  soun'  er  sleep.  I  laugh,  en  tell  'im  it 's 
mighty  blessin'  for  'im  dat  I  ain't  know  what 
a  sleepy-head  he  is  'fo'  I  marry  'im.'  " 

The  little  boy  wanted  to  laugh,  but  the 
gravity  with  which  Uncle  Eemus  narrated  the 
conversation  warned  him  that  his  mirth  would 
be  ill-timed.     The  old  man  made  no  pause. 

"Wid  dat  Brer  Eabbit  say  he  better  be 
gwine,  en  he  tip  ole  Miss  B'ar  a  bow  en  wish 
'er  mighty  well.  He  went  off  a  little  piece,  he 
did,  en  sot  down  by  de  road,  en  twis'  his  mus- 
tashes,  en  study  'bout  dat  bag  er  ashes.  He 
ax  hisse'f  wuz  ole  Miss  Bar  tryin'  fer  ter  fool 
'im,  en  he  got  so  pestered  dat  he  ain't  know 
what  ter  do. 

"Atter  so  long  a  time,  he  slipt  back  ter 
Brer  B'ar's  house,  en,  sho  nuff,  dar  wuz  de  bag 
er  ashes  in  de  chimbley  cornder,  en  inside  de 
house  he  could  hear  Brer  B'ar  sno'in  away  like 
somebody  sawin'  gourds.     Brer  Kabbit  make 


18       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

up  his  min'  dat  he  'd  sorter  hang  'roun  en  see 
whar  Brer  B'ar  go  ter  so  soon  in  de  mornin\ 
So  he  capered  'roun  in  de  grass  one  half  de 
night,  en  played  wid  de  lightnin'  bugs  tudder 
half. 

"  Time  de  chickens  'gun  to  crow  f er  day, 
Brer  B'ar  wuz  up  en  a-stirrin',  en  by  de  time 
it  wuz  light  good,  he'  d  done  slung  de  bag  er 
ashes  'cross  his  shoulder  en  wuz  a-makin'  for  de 
woods.  Brer  Eabbit  try  ter  keep  up,  but  he 
skeered  ter  git  too  close,  en  f  us'  news  he  know 
Brer  B'ar  done  make  his  disappearance.  When 
dat  happen,  dey  ain't  nothin'  mo'  fer  Brer  Rab- 
bit ter  do  but  go  home  en  dream  'bout  what 
de  name  er  goodness  Brer  B'ar  gwine  do  wid 
dat  bag  er  ashes. 

"  De  nex'  night  Brer  Rabbit  played  roun' 
en  run  atter  lightnin'  bugs  twel  everything  got 
still  at  Brer  B'ar's  house,  en  den  he  went  ter 
look  fer  de  bag  er  ashes.  Sho'  nuff,  dar  't  wuz 
—  same  bag  in  de  same  chimbley  cornder. 
Brer  Rabbit  felt  de  heft  un  it,  en  it  seem  like 
ter  him  dat  dey  wuz  'bout  a  bushel  er  ashes  in 
dar.  Den  he  grab  holt  er  one  cornder  er  de 
bag  en  tored  a  hole  in  it.  Some  er  de  ashes 
got  up  Brer  Rabbit's  nose,  en  he  fin'  out  he 
bleedz  ter  sneeze.     He  hoi'  in  ez  long  ez  he 


THE  HONEY  ORCHARD.  19 

kin,  en  make  a  break  f er  ter  git  ez  fur  f urn  de 
house  ez  he  kin  'fo'  de  sneeze  come.  He  helt 
his  breff,  he  did,  long  ez  he  kin,  en  when  de 
sneeze  did  bust  aloose,  gentermens !  he  turned 
a  fair  somerset  backerds,  en  dey  wuz  sech  a 
splutterment  dat  de  Guinny  hens  got  ter  hol- 
lerin'  en  de  chickens  ter  cackling  en  ole  Brer 
Rabbit  tuck  his  foot  in  his  han'  en  lit  out  f um 
dar. 

"  Well,  suh,  nex'  mornin'  he  got  up  some 
sooner  dan  he  in  de  habits  er  doin',  en  he  went 
'roun'  by  Brer  B'ar's  house.  He  went  'roun' 
de  same  way  whar  he  see  Brer  B'ar  go  de 
mornin'  'fo'  dat,  en  he  ain't  gone  fur  twel  he 
see  whar  de  ashes  been  spillin'  out'n  de  bag. 
Dat  what  he  make  de  hole  in  de  bag  fer. 
Eve'y  time  Brer  B'ar  take  a  step,  he  'd  jolt  de 
ashes  out.  Brer  Rabbit,  he  f oiler' d  de  track 
er  de  ashes.  He  foller'd  long,  he  did,  up  hill 
en  down,  thoo  bushes  en  thoo  briers,  twel 
bimeby  he  come  'pon  Brer  B'ar,  en  what  you 
reckon  dat  creetur  wuz  a-doin'  ?  " 

Uncle  Remus  paused,  as  if  he  expected  the 
youngster  to  give  an  answer.  Receiving  none 
he  went  on,  — 

"Well,  suh,  he  wan't  doin'  nothin'  in  de 
roun'  worF  but   eatin'  honey!     Pyo  honey  1 


20       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

Eatin'  honey  en  cleanin'  de  comb.  Des  de 
natchul  start-naked  bee-juice !  When  Brer 
Rabbit  see  dat,  he  like  ter  fainted.  He  flung 
bofe  han's  up  en  fell  down  on  de  groun'  like 
he  dead.     De  sight  skeer  'im." 

66  Why,  there  was  n't  anything  to  frighten 
him,"  said  the  little  boy. 

"  He  bleedz  ter  be  skeered.  Ole  Brer  B'ar 
ain't  look  like  hisse'f .  He  done  empty  de  bag 
er  ashes  on  de  groun'  en  waller  in  um  twel  he 
look  like  he  done  turn  gray  endurin'  de  night. 
He  put  um  on  'im,  I  speck,  fer  ter  keep  bees 
f  um  stingin'  'im.  Dar  he  wuz,  up  a  tree,  eatin' 
honey  by  de  han'ful,  en  all  'roun'  dat  place 
dey  wuz  a  clump  er  big  poplar  trees.  Eve'y 
one  un  um  wuz  holler,  en  eve'y  one  un  um 
wuz  full  er  honey,  kaze  Brer  Rabbit  seed  de 
bees  des  a-swarmin'  in  en  out  constant.  He 
sot  dar,  he  did,  en  watch  Brer  B'ar  eatin 
honey  twel  he  'gun  ter  dribble  at  de  mouf,  en 
he  got  so  hongry  dat  bimeby  he  went  up 
closter,  en  ax  Brer  B'ar  fer  ter  please,  suh,  gi' 
'im  a  han'ful  er  honey. 

"  Brer  B'ar  'low,  '  G'  way  fum  dar,  you 
triflin',  low  down  vilyun  !  I  gi'  you  nothin' ! 
Go  on  'bout  yo'  business,  'fo'  I  come  down 
dar  en  w'ar  you  out  ter  a  frazzle  ! ' 


THE  HONEY  ORCHARD.  21 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  Please,  suh,  Brer  B'ar, 
des  gimme  a  little  piece  ;  des  a  teenchy  bit  er 
de  comb,  Brer  B'ar.' 

"  Wid  dat,  Brer  B'ar  sorter  scramble  down 
de  tree  like  he  comin'  atter  Brer  Rabbit,  en  I 
bet  you  Brer  Rabbit  got  up  en  dusted  'way 
fum  dar.  He  tuck  a  nigh  cut  home,  en  he  sot 
down  in  de  chimbley  cornder  en  studied  out  a 
plan  fer  ter  git  even  wid  Brer  B'ar.  So  de  nex' 
day,  whiles  Brer  B'ar  done  gone  ter  de  honey 
orchard,  Brer  Rabbit  'semble  all  de  creeturs, 
horn,  claw,  en  wing,  en  tell  um  how  de  Ian' 
lay,  en  how  Brer  B'ar  been  foolin'  um.  He 
say  't  ain't  no  wonder  dat  Brer  B'ar  rollin'  in 
fat  when  he  go  off  dar  eve'y  day  en  gorge  his- 
se'f  on  honey,  en  not  let  nobody  get  a  smell 
un  it,  much  less  a  tas'e. 

"  All  de  creeturs  'gree  wid  Brer  Rabbit,  en 
dey  say  dey  'd  do  anything  he  tell  um,  ef  dey 
kin  l'arn  Brer  B'ar  some  manners.  Den  Brer 
Rabbit  say  he  speck  de  bes'  way  ter  do  is  ter 
git  up  a  harrycane.  De  creeturs  ax  'im  how 
de  name  er  goodness  dey  gwine  do  dat,  en 
Brer  Rabbit  say  he  '11  fix  it.  Den  he  tuck  um 
all  out  dar  close  ter  de  honey  orchard,  en  all 
de  big  creeturs  he  made  stan'  by  big  saplin's, 
en  de  !ittle  uns  he  put  at  de  little  saplin's. 


22       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  TEE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  He  'low,  '  Now  den,  when  you  hear  me 
holler,  you  rub  up  'gin'  deze  saplin's  en  shake 
um  ez  hard  ez  you  kin.' 

"  De  wing  creeturs  what  kin  fly,  he  made 
git  up  in  de  top  er  de  trees.  He  'low,  i  When 
you  hear  me  holler,  you  flutter  des  ez  hard  ez 
you  kin.' 

"  De  wing  creeturs  what  kin  run,  he  made 
um  git  in  de  broom-sage,  en  he  'low,  6  When 
you  hear  me  holler,  run  thoo  de  grass  ez  hard 
ez  you  kin.' 

"  Brer  Kabbit  had  a  long  rope,  en  he  went 
off  a  little  piece  f  er  ter  git  a  good  start,  en  ter- 
rectly  here  he  come,  draggin'  de  rope  en  run- 
nin'  like  a  yaller  dog  wid  a  tin  pail  tied  ter  his 
tail.  Brer  B'ar,  up  dar  in  de  bee-tree,  hear 
'im  runnin',  en  ax  'im  what  de  matter. 

"  Wid  dat  Brer  Rabbit  fetch  a  whoop,  ea 
'low,  'Dey  's  a  harrycane  comin',  Brer  B'ar,  en 
I  bleedz  ter  run  somer's  en  tie  myse'f  ter 
a  tree,  fer  ter  keep  fum  bein'  blow'd  away. 
Don't  you  hear  it  comin'  ?  ' 

"  Co'se,  when  Brer  Rabbit  holler'd,  de 
creeturs  at  de  saplin's  'gun  ter  shake  um,  en 
de  wing  creeturs  in  de  trees  'gun  ter  flutter, 
en  de  yuthers  'gun  ter  run  in  de  grass,  en  dey 
make  de  biggest  kind  er  noise.    Brer  B'ar,  he 


THE  HONEY   ORCHARD.  23 

scrambled  'bout  half-way  down  de  bee-tree,  en 
den  he  turn  eve'ything  loose  en  hit  de  groun' 
kerbiff!  Look  like  't  wuz  nuff  ter  jolt  de  life 
out'n  'im. 

"  He  say,  *  Fer  massy  sake,  Brer  Rabbit,  tie 
me  'long  wid  you.  Dis  des  ez  good  a  place  ez 
you  '11  fin'.     Tie  me  wid  you,  Brer  Rabbit.' 

"De  creeturs  keep  on  makin'  der  fuss,  en 
Brer  B'ar  git  skeerder  en  skeerder.  Brer 
Rabbit  tuck  Brer  B'ar  at  his  word,  en  he  tied 
'im  hard  en  fas'  ter  a  tree.  When  he  had  'im 
fastened  so  he  can't  git  loose,  he  call  ter  all  de 
creeturs,  Brer  Rabbit  did,  en  tell  um  ter  come 
look  at  Brer  B'ar. 

"  Den  he  'low,  i  Whiles  de  harrycane  gwine 
on,  less  us  go  git  a  bait  er  honey.  Dey  ain't 
no  win'  what  kin  blow  Brer  B'ar  off  whiles  he 
fix  dis  away.' 

"  Wid  dat  dey  raided  de  honey  orchard,  en 
gobble  up  all  dey  want,  en  tuck  some  home 
fer  der  wimmen  folks  en  chilluns." 

"  Who  unfastened  Brother  Bear  ?  "  the  lit- 
tle boy  asked. 

"  Eh-eh,  honey  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus. 
"You  pushes  yo'  inquirements  too  fur.  Dat 
what 's  in  de  tale  I  kin  tell  you ;  dat  what 
ain't  you  '11  hatter  figger  out  fer  yo'se'f." 


xn. 

BROTHER  RABBIT  HAS  FUN  AT  THE  FERRY. 

One  night  when  the  little  boy  ran  out  to 
Uncle  Remus's  house,  he  heard  the  old  man 
talking  with  some  of  the  other  negroes  about 
an  accident  at  Armour's  Ferry.  The  flat,  as 
the  ferry-boat  was  called,  had  broken  the  rope 
which  was  used  to  tow  it  across  the  Oconee, 
and  had  drifted  down  the  river.  Two  mules, 
hitched  to  a  wagon,  jumped  overboard  and 
were  drowned. 

"  Ah,  Lord,"  exclaimed  Uncle  Eemus,  when 
the  negroes  had  gone.  "Ef  ole  Brer  B'ar 
had  been  de  fe'yman,  I  lay  dey  would  n't  er 
been  none  er  dat  kinder  gwines  on." 

"  Uncle  Johnny  Eoach  is  the  ferryman 
now,"  remarked  the  little  boy,  by  way  of  say- 
ing something. 

"  Dat  man  is  ole,  mon,"  said  Uncle  Remus ; 
"he  ole  en  shaky.  He  bin  dar  I  dunner  how 
long.  He  gray  en  trimbly.  'T  wan't  dat  away 
wid  Brer  B'ar.     He  wuz  young,  en  h&  ain't 


FUN  AT  THE  FERRY.  25 

had  a  gray  ha'r  in  his  head.  Folks  use  ter 
come  'long  dat  away,  en  gi'  'im  a  sev'mpunce 
des  ter  see  'im  r'ar  back  on  his  footses  en 
snatch  dat  ar  flat  'cross  de  river.  I  tell  you, 
mon,  dem  wuz  gay  times." 

Here  Uncle  Kemus  paused,  and  looked 
steadily  into  the  fireplace,  and  sighed.  The 
impression  he  left  on  the  little  boy  was  that  he 
himself  had  crossed  the  ferry  while  Brother 
Bear  was  in  charge.  But  where  was  the 
story  ?  The  youngster  looked  at  the  old  man 
intently,  and  waited  patiently. 

"Brer  B'ar  wuz  a  mighty  fine  fe'yman," 
said  Uncle  Remus,  after  awhile,  taking  off  his 
spectacles  and  rubbing  them  gently  on  his 
knee.  "  Dey  ain't  no  two  ways  'bout  dat. 
But  dey  wuz  one  time  when  he  got  outdone. 
I  dunner  what  time  er  de  day,  ner  what  day  er 
de  mont',  but 't  was  some'rs  'twixt  two  sun-ups. 
Brer  B'ar  wuz  settin'  in  de  shade,  wishin'  dat 
some  un  'ud  come  long  en  drap  a  sev'mpunce 
in  his  pocket.  He  wuz  des  'bout  ter  doze  off 
when  he  hear  somebody  holler. 

"  Man  'cross  de  river  say,  '  Hello  ! ' 

"  Brer  B'ar  raise  up  en  'low,  ( How  you  like 
f er  somebody  ter  call  you  Hello  ? ' 

"  Man  holler  back,  6  Come  put  me  'cross/ 


26        UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  B'ar  'spon',  <  Ah-yi.' 

"  De  man  wuz  ri(iin,  a  gray  mar  ,  en  de  gray 
mar'  had  a  gray  colt  wid  'er.  Brer  B'ar  swung 
de  flat  on  t'er  side,  en  whiles  she  wuz  a-swing- 
\ul  he  uz  countin'  his  money. 

"  Oh,  de  rope  is  long,  ketch  a  holt,  ketch  a  holt. 
Oh,  de  rope  is  long,  ketch  a  holt,  — 
A  dimefer  de  mar',  a  dimefer  de  man, 
En  a  thripfer  de  little  gray  colt." 

"  De  flat  she  swung  'roun',  en  Brer  B'ar  he 
sung  out,  '  Ride  in,  mister,  en  make  yo'se'f 
at  home.' 

"  Right  den  en  dar,"  continued  Uncle  Re- 
mus, leaning  back  in  his  chair  and  lifting  his 
eyebrows,  "right  den  en  dar  de  trouble  be- 
gun. Nobody  wa'n't  ter  blame ;  nobody 
wa'n't  de  'casion  un  it.  Hit  des  come  up  dry 
so,  des  like  de  measles  did  when  you  had  urn." 

"  What  trouble  was  it,  Uncle  Remus?  "  the 
little  boy  asked. 

"Hit  des  broke  out  by  hit's  own  'lone 
se'f,"  responded  the  old  man,  solemnly.  "  De 
man,  he  cluck  ter  de  mar',  en  try  f er  ter  ride 
'er  in  de  flat,  but  de  mar'  she  hilt  er  head 
down  en  sorter  snort,  en  'fuse  ter  budge.  De 
man  try  ter  coax  'er,  but  she  won't  be  coaxed. 
Den  he  gi'  'er  de  whip  en  spur,  but  she  whirl 


FUN  AT  THE  FERRY.  27 

'roun'  en  'fuse  ter  go  in  de  flat.  She  'd  go 
up,  she  'd  go  down,  she  'd  go  anywhar  en 
eve'ywhar  'ceptin'  in  de  flat.  Den  de  man  lit 
en  tried  ter  lead  'er,  but  de  mar'  drug  'im 
'bout  over  de  san'  like  he  ain't  weigh  mo'  'n 
two  poun'  en  a  half.  Brer  B'ar  try  ter  he'p, 
but  't  ain't  do  no  good.  De  colt,  seed  dat 
his  mammy  wuz  skeer'd,  en  he  'gun  ter  whicker 
en  squeal  en  run  'roun'  like  a  pig  wid  hot  dish- 
water on  his  back.  Dis  make  a  bad  matter 
wuss. 

"  Dar  dey  stood.  De  man,  he  study,  en  Brer 
B'ar,  he  study,  but  'tain't  do  no  good.  Bimeby 
Brer  B'ar  look  'roun',  en  who  should  he  see 
settin'  cross-legged  on  a  stump  a-watchin'  un 
am,  but  ole  Brer  Rabbit?  Dar  he  wuz,  des 
ez  natchul  ez  one  er  deze  yer  dagarrytypes. 
Fum  whar  he  stood  Brer  B'ar  could  n't  tell 
whedder  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  laughin'  er  whed- 
der  he  wuz  cry  in',  but  his  face  wuz  mighty 
wrinkled  up.  Brer  B'ar  call  'im,  but  Brer 
Rabbit  shuck  his  head.  Brer  B'ar  ax  'im  ter 
come  he'p  'im  git  de  mar'  on  de  flat,  but 
Brer  Rabbit  shuck  his  head.  Brer  B'ar  wuz 
^out  ter  'buze  Brer  Rabbit  'fo'  comp'ny,  but 
a  n'er  notion  struck  'im,  en  he  tuck  en  wob- 
bled off  ter  whar  Brer  Rabbit  wuz   setting 


28        UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOT. 

Time  he  got  whar  dey  could  hold  er  confab, 
Brer  Rabbit  'low  :  — 

u  c  What  de  name  er  goodness  is  you  all 
tryin'  ter  do  down  dar?  What  kinder  capers 
is  you  cuttin'  up  ?  I  bin  settin'  here  watchin' 
you,  en  des  dyin'  er  laughin'  at  de  way  you  en 
de  man  en  dem  creeturs  been  gwine  on.' 

"  Brer  B'ar  try  ter  'splain,  but  Brer  Rabbit 
keep  a-talkin' :  — 

" '  Go  on  back  down  dar,  Brer  B'ar,  en 
fool  'roun'  wid  um  some  mo'.  Fer  gracious 
sake  lemme  have  my  fun  out !  Go  on,  Brer 
B'ar  —  go  on  !  Whiles  I  'm  a-settin'  here 
chawin'  my  terbacker,  lemme  'joy  myse'f,  en 
git  de  wuf  er  my  holiday.  Go  joon  'roun' 
some  mo' ! ' 

"Den  Brer  B'ar  up'n  tell  Brer  Rabbit 
what  de  matter  is,  en  Brer  Rabbit  laugh  en 
holler  fit  ter  kill  hisse'f.  He  low:  <  My 
goodness,  Brer  B'ar,  I  had  de  idee  dat  you  all 
been  cuttin'  up  dem  capers  a-purpose.' 

"  Brer  B'ar  'low  :  '  No,  bless  gracious  ! 
Dat  man  yonder  want  ter  be  put  'cross.  He 
des  bleedz  ter  be  put  'cross,  but  how  I  gwine 
do  it,  I  '11  never  tell  you.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  sezee  :  i  Well,  Brer  B'ar, 
ef  you  let  dat  bodder  you  mo'n  a  minnit,  you  '11 


FUN  AT  THE  FERRY.  29 

make  me  b'lieve  dat  you  got  dropsy  er  de 
head.  I  hear  tell  dat  lots  er  folks  is  gittin' 
down  wid  dat  kinder  sickness.' 

"  Den  Brer  B'ar  say  he  speck  he  got  it,  kaze 
he  can't  make  no  'rangement  fer  ter  git  dat 
old  mar'  on  de  flat.  Brer  Rabbit  look  at  'im 
right  hard,  en  sorter  wrinkle  up  his  face.  He 
'low,  sezee :  — 

" '  Brer  B'ar,  hit  des  ez  easy  ez  gwine  ter 
sleep  in  a  swing.' 

"  Brer  B'ar  say,  sezee :  i  Brer  Rabbit,  how 
I  gwine  do  !  Ef  you  '11  tell  me  dat,  I  '11  do 
anything  you  ax  me;  you  can't  ax  me  nothin' 
I  won't  do.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  sezee  :  *  Well  den,  Brer 
B'ar,  all  you  got  ter  do  is  ter  shove  de  colt 
on  de  flat,  en  de  mammy  '11  foller  right  atter.' 

"  Old  Brer  B'ar  went  a-wobblin'  back  ter  de 
river,  en  when  he  got  dar  he  driv  de  colt  on 
de  flat,  en  de  mar'  f ollered  atter,  same  ez  ef 
she  'd  'a'  been  born  en  raise  on  a  flat.  When 
Brer  B'ar  see  dat,  he  'low,  '  Well ! ' 

"  De  man  ax  'im  who  tol'  'im  how  ter  do 
dat.  Brer  B'ar  make  answer  dat  't  wuz  Brer 
Rabbit,  en  den  he  went  on  to  tell  de  man 
'bout  what  er  soon  creetur  Brer  Rabbit  is,  dat 
nobody  can't  fool  'im,  en  nobody  can't  outdo 


30       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

'im.  De  man  lissen,  an  den  he  low  dat  he 
comin'  back  dat  away  in  a  day  er  two,  en  he  bet 
a  pot  er  honey  agin  a  dish  er  cream  dat  he  kin 
outdo  Brer  Babbit.  Brer  B'ar  tuck  de  bet,  en 
den  dey  shuck  han's  ter  make  it  mo'  bin  din'. 

"  Well,  't  wan't  long  atter  dat  'f  o'  here  come 
de  man  back,  en  dis  time  he  had  two  mar's. 
He  wuz  ridin'  one,  en  leadin'  de  udder,  en  dey 
wuz  bofe  des  ez  much  alike  ez  two  peas.  Dey 
wuz  de  same  color,  de  same  size,  en  de  same 
gait.  Brer  B'ar  tuck  de  man  'cross  on  t'er 
side,  en  den  he  say  dat  now  is  de  time  fer  ter 
settle  de  bet.     He  'low,  sezee  :  — 

"  '  One  er  deze  mar's  is  de  mammy,  en  de 
udder  one  is  de  colt.  Now  call  up  Brer  Bab- 
bit, en  ax  'im  ter  tell  me  which  is  which,  en 
which  is  de  udder.  Ax  'im  ter  tell  me  which 
is  de  mammy,  en  which  is  de  colt.  En  he 
ain't  got  ter  look  in  der  mouf  nudder.' 

"  Brer  B'ar  look  at  um  mighty  close,  en  den 
he  shake  his  head. 

"  Man  say,  '  Go  fetch  me  my  dish  er 
cream/ 

"  Brer  B'ar  look,  en  look,  en  still  he  shake 
his  head. 

"  Man  say,  '  Go  fetch  my  dish  er  cream/ 

"  Brer  B'ar  feel  mighty  bad,  kaze  he  smel] 


FUN  AT  THE  FERRY.  31 

de  pot  er  honey  in  de  man's  saddle-bags,  en  it 
make  his  mouf  water. 

"  Man  keep  on  sayin',  '  Go  fetch  my  dish 
er  cream.' 

"  But  Brer  B'ar  ain't  gwine  ter  give  up  dat 
away.  He  done  made  de  'rangement  fer  ter 
call  Brer  Rabbit  when  de  man  come  back,  en 
he  went  'pon  top  er  de  hill  en  holler  fer  'im. 
I  tell  you  now,  't  wan't  long  '  fo '  Brer  Rabbit 
hove  in  sight.  He  come  a-hoppin'  en  a-jump- 
in',  he  come  a-rippin'  en  a-rarin'. 

"  Brer  B'ar  'low,  sezee  :  '  Ef  you  know'd 
what  you  got  ter  do,  I  lay  you  would  n't  be  in 
sech  a  hurry.' 

"  Den  he  up'n  tell  Brer  Rabbit  de  whole 
circumstance  er  de  case.  Brer  Rabbit  laugh, 
but  Brer  B'ar  he  look  sollumcolly.  Brer 
Rabbit  tuck'n  tol'  Brer  B'ar  fer  ter  git  two 
bunches  er  grass  en  put  um  dar  front  er  de 
mar's.  Brer  B'ar  do  des  like  Brer  Rabbit  tell 
'im,  en  den  de  mar's  sot  in  ter  eatin' ;  but 
one  un  um  eat  'er  bunch  fust,  en  start  ter 
eatin'  on  t'er  bunch.  Den  de  mar'  what  wuz 
eatin'  on  dat  bunch  helt  up  'er  head. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  sezee :  '  Dat  un  what 
holdin'  up  'er  head,  she  de  mammy.' 

"  De  man  he  give  up.     He  say  dat  beat  his 


32      UNCLE  REMUS  AND   THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

time,  en  den  he  ax  Brer  Rabbit  how  kin  he 
teH. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  sezee :  i  De  colt,  bein' 
ez  she  is  de  youngest,  is  got  de  bes'  toofies. 
De  best  toofies  eat  de  grass  fust.  Den  when 
de  mammy  see  de  colt  ain't  got  none,  she 
willin,  ter  'vide  wid  'er.  Ef  de  mammy  had 
made  at  de  colt's  bundle,  de  colt  'd  sholy  V 
bit  at  'er.' 

"De  man  look  'stonish,  but  he  ain't  sati'- 
fied.  He  gun  Brer  B'ar  de  pot  er  honey,  but 
he  say  he  got  n'er  pot,  en  he  willin'  ter  bet 
dat  he  kin  fool  Brer  Rabbit  nex'  time.  Brer 
B'ar  tuck  de  bet. 

"  Den  de  man  lef '  his  hosses  dar,  en  tuck  a 
little  basket  en  went  off  in  de  woods.  He 
wuz  gone  a  right  smart  little  whet,  but  bimeby, 
here  he  come  back.  He  hilt  de  basket  high, 
so  Brer  Rabbit  can't  see  de  inside,  en  den  he 
hung  it  on  a  tree  lim\  Den  he  ax  Brer  Rab- 
bit what  de  basket  got  in  it. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  study,  en  den  he  'low,  sezee : 
'  De  sparrer  kin  tell  you.9 

"  De  man  look  at  'im  hard,  en  den  he  say,, 
sezee :  '  What  kinder  creetur  is  you,  nohow  ? * 

"  He  tuck  de  basket  down,  he  did,  en  sho* 
*nuff,  dar  wuz  a  sparrer  in  it.     He  gun  Brer 


FUN  AT  THE  FERRY,  33 

B'ar  de  t'er  pot,  en  ez  he  wuz  gwine,  he  holler 
back  at  Brer  Rabbit,  sezee :  — 

" ' You  er  one  er  deze  yer  graveyard  rab- 
bits, dat  w'at  you  is/ 

"  Brer  Rabbit  laugh,  but  he  ain't  say  no- 
thin'.  He  des  dip  'is  paw  in  de  pot  er  honey 
en  lick  it  off,  en  he  work  his  mouf  like  it  tas'e 
mighty  good." 

"  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  little  boy,  as  the 
old  man  paused,  "  how  did  Brother  Rabbit 
know  there  was  a  sparrow  in  the  basket  ?  " 

"  Who  say  he  know  it,  honey  ?  " 

"Did  n't  you  say  so?" 

"Shoo,  honey,  freshun  up  yo'  'membunce. 
When  de  man  ax  Brer  Rabbit,  What  in  dar? 
he  make  answer  dat  a  sparrer  kin  tell  'im, 
kaze  a  sparrer  flyin'  'roun'  kin  see  what  in  de 
basket." 

"Well,"  said  the  little  boy,  with  a  sigh, 
"  I  thought  Brother  Rabbit  knew." 

"  Luck  tol'  'im,  honey ;  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  a 
mighty  man  fer  luck." 


IV. 

DEATH   AND   THE   NEGRO    MAN. 

One  day  Uncle  Kemus  was  grinding  the 
axe  with  which  he  chopped  kindling  for  the 
kitchen  and  the  big  house.  The  axe  was 
very  dull.  It  was  full  of  "gaps/'  and  the 
work  of  putting  an  edge  on  it  was  neither 
light  nor  agreeable.  A  negro  boy  turned  the 
grindstone,  and  the  little  boy  poured  on  water 
when  water  was  needed. 

"  Ef  dis  yer  axe  wuz  a  yard  longer,  it  ud  be 
a  cross  cut  saw,  en  den  ef  we  had  de  lumber 
we  could  saw  it  up  en  build  us  a  house,"  said 
the  old  man. 

The  negro  boy  rolled  his  eyes  and  giggled, 
seeing  which  Uncle  Eemus  bore  so  heavily  on 
the  axe  that  the  grindstone  could  hardly  be 
turned.  The  negro  boy  ceased  giggling,  but 
he  continued  to  roll  his  eyes. 

"  Turn  it !  "  exclaimed  the  old  man.  u  Turn 
it !  Ef  you  don't  turn  it,  I  '11  make  you  stan' 
dar  plum  twel  night  gwine  thoo  de  motions. 


DEATH  AND  THE  NEGRO  MAN.  35 

I  '11  make  you  do  like  de  nigger  man  done 
wben  he  got  tired  er  work." 

The  old  man  stopped  talking,  but  the  grind- 
ing went  on.  After  awhile,  the  little  boy 
asked,  — 

"  What  did  the  man  do  when  he  got  tired 
of  work?" 

"  Dat  's  a  tale,  honey,  en  tellin'  tales  is 
play  in',"  replied  Uncle  Remus.  He  wiped  the 
blade  of  the  axe  on  the  palm  of  his  hand,  and 
tried  the  edge  with  his  thumb.  "  She  won't 
shave,"  he  said,  by  way  of  comment,  "  but  I 
speck  she  '11  do  ter  knock  out  kindlin'.  Yit 
ef  I  had  de  time,  I  'd  like  ter  stan'  here  en  see 
how  long  dish  yer  triflin'  vilyun  would  roll 
dem  eyes  at  me." 

In  a  little  while  the  axe  was  supposed  to  be 
sharp  enough,  and  then,  dismissing  the  negro 
boy,  Uncle  Remus  seated  himself  on  one  end 
of  the  frame  that  supported  the  grindstone, 
wiped  his  forehead  on  his  coat  sleeve,  and 
proceeded  to  enjoy  what  he  called  a  breathing 
spell. 

"  Dat  ar  nigger  man  you  hear  me  talk 
about,"  he  remarked,  "  wuz  a-gittin'  sorter  oF, 
en  he  got  so  he  ain't  want  ter  work  nohow  you 
kin  fix  it.     When  folks  hangs  back  fum  work 


36      UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

what  dey  bin  set  ter  do,  hit  natchully  makes  bad 
matters  wuss,  en  dat  de  way  't  wuz  with  dish 
yer  nigger  man.  He  helt  back,  en  he  hung 
back,  en  den  de  white  folks  got  fretted  wid 
'im  en  sot  'im  a  task.  Gentermens  !  dat  nig- 
ger man  wuz  mad.  He  wuz  one  er  deze  yer 
Affiky  niggers,  en  you  know  how  dey  is  — • 
bowlegged  en  bad  tempered.  He  quoiled  en 
he  quoiled  when  he  'uz  by  his  own  lone  se'f, 
en  he  quoiled  when  he  'uz  wid  tudder  folks. 

"  He  got  so  mad  dat  he  say  he  hope  ole 
Gran'sir  Death  '11  come  take  him  off,  en  take 
his  marster  en  de  overseer  'long  wid  'im.  He 
talk  so  long  en  he  talk  so  loud,  dat  de  white 
folks  hear  what  he  say.  Den  de  marster  en 
de  overseer  make  it  up  'mongst  deyse'f  dat 
dey  gwine  *er  play  a  prank  on  dat  nigger 
man. 

"  So  den,  one  night,  a  leetle  atter  midnight, 
de  marster  got  'm  a  white  counterpane,  he  did, 
en  wrop  hisse'f  in  it,  en  den  he  cut  two  eye- 
holes in  a  piller-case,  en  drawed  it  down  over 
his  head,  en  went  down  ter  de  house  whar  de 
nigger  man  stay.  Nigger  man  ain't  gone  ter 
bed.  He  been  fryin'  meat  en  bakin'  ashcake, 
en  he  sot  dar  in  de  cheer  noddin',  wid  grease 
in  his  mouf  en  big  hunk  er  ashcake  in  his 


DEATH  AND  THE  NEGRO  MAN.  37 

han\  De  door  wuz  half-way  open3  en  de  fire 
burnin'  low. 

"JDe  marster  walk  in,  he  did,  en  sorter  cle'r 
up  his  th'oat.  Nigger  man  ain't  wake  up. 
Ef  he  make  any  movement,  it  uz  ter  clinch 
de  ashcake  a  leetle  tighter.  Den  de  marster 
knock  on  de  door  —  blim-blim-blim  !  Nig- 
ger man  sorter  fling  his  head  back,  but 't  wan't 
long  'fo'  hit  drapt  forrerd  ag'in,  en  he  went 
on  wid  his  noddin'  like  nothin'  ain't  happen. 
De  marster  knock  some  mo'  —  blam-blam- 
blam  !  Dis  time  de  nigger  wake  up  en  roll 
his  eye -balls  roun'.  He  see  de  big  white 
thing,  en  he  skeered  ter  move.  His  han' 
shake  so  he  tu'n  de  ashcake  loose. 

"  Nigger  man  low,  *  Who  dat  ? ' 

"  De  marster  say :  *  You  call  me,  en  I 
come.' 

"  Nigger  man  say :  '  I  ain't  call  you.  What 
yo'  name?' 

"  Marster  'low,  '  Grandsir  Death.' 

"  Nigger  man  shake  so  he  can't  skacely  set 
still.  De  col'  sweat  come  out  on  'im.  He  'low, 
'Marse  Death,  I  ain't  call  you.  Somebody 
been  fool  you.' 

"De  marster  'low,  'I  been  hear  you  call 
me  p'intedly.     I  listen  at  you  ter-day,  en  yis- 


38       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

tiddy,  en  day  'f  o'  yistiddy.  You  say  you  want 
me  ter  take  you  en  yo'  marster  en  de  overseer. 
Now  I  done  come  at  yo'  call.' 

"  Nigger  man  shake  wuss.  He  say :  6  Marse 
Death,  go  git  de  overseer  fust.  He  lots  bigger 
en  fatter  dan  what  I  is.  You  '11  like  him  de 
bes'.  Please,  suh,  don't  take  me  dis  time,  en 
I  won't  bodder  you  no  mo'  long  ez  I  live.' 

"  De  marster  'low,  i  I  come  f er  de  man  dat 
call  me  !  I  'm  in  a  hurry  !  Daylight  mus'  n't 
ketch  me  here.    Come  on  ! ' 

"  Well,  suh,  dat  nigger  man  make  a  break 
for  de  winder,  he  did,  en  he  went  thoo  it  like 
a  frog  divin'  in  de  mill  pon'.  He  tuck  ter 
de  woods,  en  he  'uz  gone  mighty  nigh  a  week. 
When  he  come  back  home  he  went  ter  work, 
en  he  work  harder  dan  any  er  de  res'.  Some- 
body come  'long  en  try  ter  buy  'im,  but  his 
marster  'low  he  won't  take  lev'm  hunder'd 
dollars  for  'im,  —  cash  money,  paid  down  in 
his  han' !  " 


WHERE   THE    HARRYCANE    COMES    FROM. 

While  Uncle  Remus  was  telling  the  little 
boy  how  the  negro  man  had  been  frightened 
by  his  master,  the  clouds  began  to  gather  in 
the  southwest,  dark  and  threatening.  They 
rose  higher  and  higher,  and  presently  they 
began  to  fly  swiftly  overhead.  Uncle  Remus 
studied  them  carefully  a  moment,  and  then 
remarked  sententiously  :  — 

"  Mo'  win'  dan  water,  I  speck." 

"  How  can  you  tell,  Uncle  Remus  ?  "  asked 
the  little  boy. 

"  Caze  when  cloud  got  water  in  it  you  kin 
see  de  shadder  er  de  rain  ;  you  can  see  where 
she  starts  ter  break  off  fum  de  cloud.  Dat 
cloud  yonder  look  black,  but  she  's  all  stirred 
up  ;  you  can't  see  no  rain  trailin'  down.  She 
look  like  she  been  tousled  and  tumbled." 

Just  then  the  old  man  and  the  little  boy 
felt  the  cool  wind  strike  their  faces,  and  the 
leaves  of  the  trees  began  to  rustle.     Straight- 


40       UNCLE  EEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

way  they  heard  a  sighing  sound  in  the  dis- 
tance, which  gradually  increased  to  a  steady 
roar,  accompanied  by  an  occasional  gleam  of 
lightning  and  rumbling  of  thunder. 

"  I  speck  we  better  git  in  under  de  shin- 
gles/' said  Uncle  Kemus.  "  It  mought  be  a 
harrycane,  an  den  agin  it  mought  n't." 

They  went  into  the  old  negro's  cabin,  and 
sat  there  watching  the  approaching  storm.  It 
was  not  much  of  a  storm  after  all.  There 
was  a  very  high  wind,  which  seemed  to  blow 
through  the  tops  of  the  trees  (as  Uncle  Re- 
mus expressed  it,  "  She  rid  high  ")  without 
reaching  the  ground.  While  the  gale  in  the 
upper  air  was  at  its  height,  there  was  a  sud- 
den downpour  of  hail,  which  rattled  on  the 
roof  with  startling  effect  for  a  few  moments. 
In  half  an  hour  the  clouds  had  been  whisked 
away  out  of  sight,  and  the  sun  was  shining 
again.  The  little  boy  had  a  good  many  re- 
marks to  make  about  the  wind  and  the  hail, 
and  a  great  many  questions  to  ask.  Uncle 
Remus  himself  was  unusually  talkative,  and, 
finally,  in  response  to  some  suggestion  of  the 
child's,  said :  — 

"  Dem  what  done  seed  one  harrycane  ain't 
gwine  hone  atter  no  mo'  —  dat  dey  ain't.     I 


WHERE  THE  HABRYCANE  COMES  FROM.     41 

use  ter  hear  ole  Miss  talk  'bout  a  bed  tick  dat 
wuz  blow'd  f um  Jones  county  mos'  ter  'Gusty. 
Dat  same  harrycane  blow'd  de  roof  off'n  a 
house  whar  de  folks  wuz  eatin'  supper,  en 
did  n't  put  de  candle  out.  Dat  what  ole 
Miss  say,"  said  the  old  man,  noting  the  little 
boy's  look  of  astonishment,  —  "  dat  what  ole 
Miss  say,  en  she  yo'  gran-mammy.  You  kin 
'spute  it  ef  you  wanter.  It  tuck  a  mule  en 
landed  'im  in  de  tree  top,  en  tuck  de  mat- 
tress fum  under  a  baby  in  de  cradle  en  lef 
de  baby  layin'  dar.  I  wuz  stannin'  right  by 
when  ole  Miss  sesso." 

"  Where  do  the  harrycanes  start  from, 
Uncle  Eemus  ?  "  asked  the  little  boy. 

The  old  man  chuckled,  as  he  took  a  chew 
of  tobacco :  — 

"  What  de  use  er  me  tellin'  you,  honey  ? 
You  won't  nigh  believe  me,  en  mo'n  dat ; 
you  '11  go  up  yander  en  tell  Miss  Sally  dat  de 
ole  nigger  done  gone  ravin'  'stracted." 

"  Now,  Uncle  Eemus,  you  know  I  won't," 
protested  the  little  boy. 

"  Well,  folks  lots  older  en  bigger  dan  what 
you  is  ud  go  en  do  it,  en  not  so  much  ez  bat 
der  eyes."  € 

The  old  man  paused,  took  off  his  spectacles, 


42       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

and  rubbed  his  eyes  with  thumb  and  forefin- 
ger. Replacing  the  glasses,  he  looked  care- 
fully around,  laid  his  hand  confidentially  on 
the  little  boy's  shoulder,  and  said  in  a  low 
whisper :  — 

"  I  '11  tell  you  whar  de  harrycane  starts. 
Dey  starts  in  de  big  swamp !  In  a  hollow 
tree  !  Down  dar  whar  de  bullace  vines 
grows  !     Dat  's  whar  dey  starts." 

"  I  don't  see  how  that  can  be,"  said  the 
puzzled  youngster. 

"I  speck  not,"  remarked  Uncle  Remus, 
dryly.  "  You  dunner  how  't  is  dat  dat  ar 
acorn  in  yo'  han'  is  got  a  great  big  oak  tree 
in  it.  Dey  got  ter  be  a  startin'  place.  Ef 
trees  wuz  ter  start  out  trees,  you  'd  see  a  mon- 
st'us  upsettin'  all  roun'  ev'eywheres.  Dey  'd 
be  trouble,  mon,  en  a  heap  un  it." 

"  But  how  can  a  harrycane  start  in  a  hollow 
tree,  Uncle  Remus  ?  "  the  child  asked. 

"  Well,  suh,  one  time  when  I  wuz  a  little 
bigger  dan  what  you  is,  dey  wuz  a  ole  Affiky 
man  live  on  de  place,  en  he  kep'  a-tellin'  me 
tales,  and  bimeby  one  day  he  'low  he  wanter 
shew  me  some  harrycane  seed.  I  ain't  had 
much  sense,  but  I  had  'nuff  fer  ter  tell  'im  I 
don't  wanter  look  at  urn,  kaze  I  f ear'd  dey  'd 


WHERE  THE  HABRYCANE  COMES  FROM.     43 

sprout  en  come  up  right  'fo'  my  eyes.  Den 
dat  ole  Affiky  man,  he  squinch  his  eyes  at  me 
en  tell  me  de  tale  how  de  harrycane  start. 

"  Hit 's  all  on  account  er  ole  Sis  Swamp-Owl. 
All  de  birds  er  de  a'r  sot  her  ole  man  fer  ter 
watch  de  vittles  one  time,  en  he  tuck'n  went 
ter  sleep  en  let  some  un  steal  it.  Dey  kotch 
'im  sleep,  en  f um  dat  time  out  dey  start  in  ter 
fight  'im  eve'y  time  he  show  his  head  in  day- 
light. Dis  make  Ole  Sis  Swamp-Owl  mad,  en 
so  one  day,  when  de  hot  wedder  come,  she 
make  up  her  min'  dat  she  gwine  ter  gi'  de 
tudder  birds  some  trouble.  She  come  out  de 
holler  tree  en  sot  up  in  de  top  lim's.  She 
look  to'rds  sundown,  rain-seeds  floatin'  'roun' ; 
she  look  up  in  de  elements,  dey  look  hazy. 
She  tap  on  de  tree. 

"  '  Wake  up,  ole  man  ;  harrycane  gittin' 
ripe.' 

"  She  stretch  out  'er  wings,  so  —  en  flop 
um  down  —  dis  away  —  en  right  den  an  dar 
de  harrycane  seed  sprouted." 

Uncle  Remus  used  his  arms  to  illustrate  the 
motion  of  the  wings. 

"  When  she  flop  'er  wings,  de  tree  leafs 
'gun  ter  rustle.  She  flop  um  some  mo',  en 
de  lim's  'gun  ter  shake,  en  de  win'  kotch  up 


44       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

mo'  win,  en  git  harder  en  harder,  twel  bimeby 
it  look  like  it  gwine  ter  claw  de  grass  out  de 
groun\  Den  de  thunder  en  de  lightnin'  dey 
jin'd  it,  en  it  des  went  a-whirlin'. 

"  Sence  dat  time,  whenever  ole  Sis  Owl  gits 
tired  er  de  crows  en  de  jaybirds,  en  de  bee- 
martins  pickin'  at  her  en  her  folks,  she  des 
comes  out  en  flops  her  wings,  en  dar  's  yo5 
harrycane." 


VI. 


WHY   BROTHER   WOLF   DID  N  T   EAT   THE 
LITTLE    RABBITS. 

"Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  little  boy  one 
day,  "  why  don't  you  come  up  to  the  big 
house  sometimes,  and  tell  me  stories  ?  " 

"  Shoo,  honey,  de  spoon  hatter  go  ter  de 
bowl's  house.  Ef  I  wuz  atter  you  ter  tell  me 
tales,  I  'd  come  up  dar  en  set  in  de  back 
porch  en  lissen  at  you  eve'y  day,  en  some- 
times eve'y  night.  But  when  de  spoon  want 
anything,  it  hatter  go  ter  de  bowl.  Hit  bleedz 
ter  be  dat  away." 

"  Well,  you  used  to  come." 

"  Des  so  ! "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus.  "  But 
whar  wuz  you  'bout  dat  time  ?  Right  flat  er 
yo'  back,  dat 's  whar  you  wuz.  You  laid  dar 
en  swaller'd  dat  doctor  truck  twel  I  be  blest 
ef  you  had  mo'  heft  dan  a  pa'tridge  egg  wid' 
de  innerds  blow'd  out.  En  dar  wuz  Miss 
Sally  a-cryin'  en  gwine  on  constant.  Ef  she 
wan't  cryin'  bout  you,  she  wuz  quoilin'  at  me 


46       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

en  Marse  John.  'Oman  tongue  ain't  got  no 
Sunday.  Co'se,  when  I  git  dar  whar  you  wuz, 
I  hatter  set  down  en  tell  tales  fer  ter  make 
you  fergit  'bout  de  fuss  dat  wuz  gwine  on. 
I  'member  one  time/'  Uncle  Remus  went  on, 
laughing,  "  I  wuz  settin'  dar  by  yo'  bed, 
tellin'  some  great  tale  er  nudder,  en  de  fus' 
news  I  know'd  I  woke  up  and  foun'  myse'f 
fast  asleep,  en  you  woke  up  en  foun'  yo'se'f 
in  de  land  er  Nod.  Dar  we  wuz,  —  me  in  de 
cheer,  en  you  in  de  bed  ;  en  I  'd  nod  at  you, 
en  you  'd  sno'  back  at  me  ;  en  dar  wuz  de  old 
torty-shell  cat  settin'  by  de  h'ath,  runnin'  dat 
ar  buzz-wheel  what  cats  has  got  somewhars  in 
der  innerds ;  en  de  clock  wuz  a-clockin'  en  de 
candle  a-splutterin' ;  en  des  'bout  dat  time 
Miss  Sally  come  in  en  rap  me  'pon  topper  de 
naked  place  on  my  head  wid  er  thimble ;  en 
I  kotch  my  breff  like  a  cow  a-coughin',  en  den 
Miss  Sally  start  in  ter  quoilin',  en  Marse  John 
ax  'er  what  she  doin',  en  she  'low  she  des 
whisperin'  ter  me ;  en  Marse  John  say  ef  she 
call  dat  whisperin',  he  dunner  what  she  call 
squallin' ;  en  den  I  up  en  groanded  one  er  deze 
yer  meetin'-house  groans. 

"  Dem  wuz  great  times,  mon,"  continued  the 
old  man,  after  pausing  to  recover  his  breath. 


THE  LITTLE  RABBITS.  47 

*  Dey  mos'  sholy  wuz.  Hit  look  like  ter  me 
'bout  dem  days  dat  you  wan't  no  bigger  dan 
a  young  rabbit  atter  de  hide  been  tuck  off. 
You  cert'nly  wuz  spare-made  den.  I  sot  dar 
by  yo'  bed,  en  I  say  ter  myse'f  dat  ef  I  wuz  de 
ole  Brer  Wolf  en  you  wuz  a  young  rabbit,  I 
would  n't  git  hongry  nuff  fer  ter  eat  you, 
caze  you  wuz  too  bony." 

"  When  did  Brother  Wolf  want  to  eat  the 
young  rabbit,  Uncle  Remus  ? "  inquired  the 
little  boy,  thinking  that  he  saw  the  sugges- 
tion of  a  story  here. 

He  was  not  mistaken.  The  old  man  re- 
garded him  with  well  feigned  astonishment. 

"Ain't  I  done  tole  you  'bout  dat,  honey? 
Des  run  over  in  yo'  min',  en  see  ef  I  ain't." 

The  youngster  shook  his  head  most  em- 
phatically. 

"  Well,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  ole  Brer 
Wolf  want  ter  eat  de  little  Rabs  all  de  time, 
but  dey  wuz  one  time  in  'tickeler  dat  dey 
make  his  mouf  water,  en  dat  wuz  de  time 
when  him  en  Brer  Fox  wuz  visitin'  at  Brer 
Rabbit's  house.  De  times  wuz  hard,  but  de 
little  Rabs  wuz  slick  en  fat,  en  des  ez  frisky 
ez  kittens.  Ole  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  off  som'ers, 
en  Brer  Wolf  en  Brer  Fox  wuz  waitin  'fer  'im. 


48       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

De  little  Eabs  wuz  playin'  'roun',  en  dough 
dey  wuz  little  dey  kep'  der  years  open.  Brer 
Wolf  look  at  urn  out'n  de  cornder  uv  his  eyes, 
en  lick  his  chops  en  wink  at  Brer  Fox,  en 
Brer  Fox  wunk  back  at  'im.  Brer  Wolf 
cross  his  legs,  en  den  Brer  Fox  cross  his'n. 
De  little  Kabs,  dey  frisk  en  dey  frolic. 

"  Brer  Wolf  ho'd  his  head  to'rds  um  en 
'low,  '  Dey  er  mighty  fat.' 

"  Brer  Fox  grin,  en  say,  '  Man,  hush  yo' 
mouf ! ' 

"  De  little  Rabs  frisk  en  frolic,  en  play 
furder  off,  but  dey  keep  der  years  primed. 

"  Brer  Wolf  look  at  um  en  low,  c  Ain't  dey 
slick  en  purty  ?  ' 

"  Brer  Fox  chuckle,  en  say,  6  Oh,  I  wish 
you  'd  hush  ! ' 

"  De  little  Rabs  play  off  furder  en  furder, 
but  dey  keep  der  years  open. 

"  Brer  Wolf  smack  his  mouf  ;  en  'low,  €  Dey 
er  joosy  en  tender.' 

"  Brer  Fox  roll  his  eye  en  say,  '  Man,  ain't 
you  gwine  ter  hush  up,  'fo'  you  gi'  me  de  fid- 
gets ? ' 

"  De  little  Rabs  dey  frisk  en  dey  frolic,  but 
dey  hear  eve'ything  dat  pass. 

"  Brer  Wolf  lick  out  his  tongue  quick,  en 
'low,  *  Less  us  whirl  in  en  eat  um.' 


THE  LITTLE  BABBITS.  49 

rt  Brer  Fox  say,  '  Man,  you  make  me  hon- 
gry  !    Please  hush  up  ! ' 

u  De  little  Rabs  play  off  f  urder  en  f  urder, 
but  dey  know  'zackly  what  gwine  on.  Dey 
frisk  en  dey  frolic,  but  dey  got  der  years  wide 
open. 

"  Den  Brer  Wolf  make  a  bargain  wid  Brer 
Fox  dat  when  Brer  Rabbit  git  home,  one  un 
urn  ud  git  'im  wropped  up  in  a  'spute  'bout 
fust  one  thing  en  den  anudder,  whiles  tudder 
one  ud  go  out  en  ketch  de  little  Rabs. 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  i  You  better  do  de  talkin', 
Brer  Wolf,  en  lemme  coax  de  little  Rabs  off. 
I  got  mo'  winnin'  ways  wid  chilluns  dan  what 
you  is.' 

"  Brer  Wolf  say,  '  You  can't  make  gourd 
out'n  punkin,  Brer  Fox.  I  ain't  no  talker. 
Yo'  tongue  lots  slicker  dan  mine.  I  kin  bite 
lots  better'n  I  kin  talk.  Dem  little  Rabs  don't 
want  no  coaxin' ;  dey  wants  ketchin'  —  dat 
what  dey  wants.  You  keep  ole  Brer  Rabbit 
busy,  en  I  '11  ten'  ter  de  little  Rabs.' 

"  Bofe  un  um  know  'd  dat  whichever  cotch 
de  little  Rabs,  de  tudder  one  ain't  gwine  smell 
hide  ner  hair  un  um,  en  dey  flew  up  en  got 
ter  'sputin',  en  whiles  dey  wuz  'sputin'  en 
gwine  on  dat  away,  de  little  Rabs  put  off  down 


50       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

de  road,  —  blickety-blickety ,  —  for  ter  meet 
der  daddy.  Kase  dey  know'd  ef  dey  stayed 
dar  dey  'd  git  in  big  trouble. 

?  Dey  went  off  down  de  road,  de  little  Rabs 
did,  en  dey  ain't  gone  so  mighty  fur  'fo'  dey 
meet  der  daddy  comin'  long  home.  He  had 
his  walkin'  cane  in  one  han'  en  a  jug  in  de 
udder,  en  he  look  ez  big  ez  life,  en  twice  ez 
natchul. 

"  De  little  Rabs  wrun  to'rds  'im  en  holler, 
i  What  you  got,  dadd/  ?  What  you  got, 
daddy  V 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  fc  Norinv'  but  er  jug  er 
'lasses.' 

"  De  little  Rabs  holler, c  Lemme  tas'e,  daddy ! 
Lemme  tas'e,  daddy ! ' 

"  Den  ole  Brer  Rabbit  sot  de  jug  down  in 
de  road  en  let  um  lick  de  stopper  a  time  er 
two,  en  atter  dey  done  get  der  win'  back,  dey 
up'n  tell  'im  'bout  de  'greement  dat  Brer 
Wolf  en  Brer  Fox  done  make,  en  'bout  de 
'spute  what  dey  had.  Ole  Brer  Rabbit  sorter 
laugh  ter  hisse'f,  en  den  he  pick  up  his  jug  en. 
jog  on  to'rds  home.  When  he  git  mos'  dar  he 
stop  en  tell  de  little  Rabs  fer  stay  back  dar  out 
er  sight,  en  wait  twel  he  call  um  'fo'  dey 
come.     Dey  wuz  mighty  glad  ter  do  des  like 


THE  LITTLE  BABBITS.  51 

dis,  kaze  dey  'd  done  seed  Brer  Wolf  tushes, 
en  Brer  Fox  red  tongue,  en  dey  huddle  up  in 
de  broom-sage  ez  still  ez  a  mouse  in  de  flour 
bar'l. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  went  on  home,  en  sho  'nuff, 
he  fin'  Brer  Wolf  en  Brer  Fox  waitin'  fer  'im. 
Dey  'd  done  settle  der  'spute,  en  dey  wuz  set- 
tin*  dar  des  ez  smilin'  ez  a  basket  er  chips. 
Dey  pass  de  time  er  day  wid  Brer  Rabbit,  en 
den  dey  ax  'im  what  he  got  in  de  jug.  Brer 
Rabbit  hummed  en  haw'd,  en  looked  sorter 
solium. 

"  Brer  Wolf  look  like  he  wuz  bleedz  ter 
fin'  out  what  wuz  in  de  jug,  en  he  keep  a  pes- 
terin'  Brer  Rabbit  'bout  it ;  but  Brer  Rabbit 
des  shake  his  head  en  look  solium,  en  talk 
'bout  de  wedder  en  de  craps,  en  one  thing  en 
anudder.  Bimeby  Brer  Fox  make  out  he  wuz 
gwine  atter  a  drink  er  water,  en  he  slip  out, 
he  did,  fer  ter  ketch  de  little  Rabs.  Time  he 
git  out  de  house,  Brer  Rabbit  look  all  'roun' 
ter  see  ef  he  lis'nen,  en  den  he  went  ter  de 
jug  en  pull  out  de  stopper. 

"  He  han'  it  ter  Brer  Wolf  en  say,  '  Tas'e 
dat.' 

"  Brer  Wolf  tas'e  de  'lasses,  en  smack  his 
mouf .  He  'low,  '  What  kinder  truck  dat  ? 
Hit  sho  is  good.' 


52       UNCLE  EEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  git  up  close  ter  Brer  Wolf  en 
say,  '  Don't  tell  nobody.     Hit 's  Fox-blood.' 

"  Brer  Wolf  look  'stonish'.  He  'low,  '  How 
you  know  ? ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  c  I  knows  what  I  knows  ! ' 
"  Brer  Wolf  say,  '  Gimme  some  mo' !  * 
"  Brer  Rabbit  say,   i  You  kin  git  some  mo' 
fer  yo'se'f  easy  'nuff,  en  de  fresher  't  is,  de 
better.' 

"  Brer  Wolf  'low,  c  How  you  know  ?  f 
"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  c  I  knows  what  I  knows ! ' 
"  Wid  dat  Brer  Wolf  stepped  out,  en  start 
to'rds  Brer  Fox.  Brer  Fox  seed  'im  comin', 
en  he  sorter  back  off.  Brer  Wolf  got  little 
closer,  en  bimeby  he  make  a  dash  at  Brer 
Fox.  Brer  Fox  dodge,  he  did,  en  den  he  put 
out  fer  de  woods  wid  Brer  Wolf  right  at  his 
heels. 

"  Den  atter  so  long  a  time,  atter  Brer  Rab- 
bit got  done  laughin',  he  call  up  de  little  Rabs, 
gi'  um  some  'lasses  fer  supper,  en  spanked  um 
en  sont  um  ter  bed." 

"  Well,  what  did  he  spank  'em  for,  Uncle 
Remus  ?  "  asked  the  little  boy. 

"  Ter  make  um  grow,  honey,  —  des  ter  make 
um  grow !  Young  creeturs  is  got  ter  have  der 
hide  loosen'd  dat  away,  same  ez  young  chit 
Inns." 


THE  LITTLE  RABBITS.  53 

"Did  Brother  Wolf  catch  Brother  Fox?" 
"  How  I  know,  honey  ?  Much  ez  I  kin  do 
ter  f  oiler  de  tale  when  it  keeps  in  de  big  road, 
let  'lone  ter  keep  up  wid  dem  creeturs  whiles 
dey  gone  sailin'  thoo  de  woods.  De  tale  ain't 
persoo  on  atter  um  no  furder  dan  de  place 
whar  dey  make  der  disappear'nce.  I  tell  you 
now,  when  I  goes  in  de  woods,  I  got  ter  know 
whar  I  'm  gwine." 


VII. 

MRS.    PARTRIDGE    HAS    A   FIT. 

"I  reckon  maybe  you  done  got  de  idee 
dat  Brer  Rabbit  is  in  about  de  smartest  cree- 
ter  in  de  whole  er  creation/'  said  Uncle  Re- 
mus, after  he  had  cleaned  out  his  pipe,  and 
refilled  it.  "  Well,  suh,  ef  you  got  dat  idee, 
you  er  mighty  much  mistaken,  kaze  eve'y  once 
in  a  while  sump'n  er  nudder  'ud  happen  fer 
ter  take  de  starch  out'n  Brer  Rabbit.  Hit 
allers  happen  dat  away.  Go  whar  you  will  en 
when  you  may,  en  stay  long  ez  you  choosen 
ter  stay,  en  right  dar  en  den  you  '11  sholy  fin' 
dat  folks  what  git  full  er  consate  en  proudness 
is  gwine  ter  git  it  tuck  out'n  urn.  You  kin 
see  it  gwine  on  right  here  'f  o'  yo'  eyes.  Look 
at  dat  Yaller  Jake.  Miss  Sally  got  'im  ter 
drive  de  carriage  t'er  Sunday,  en  'fo'  he  got 
back  home  he  done  f  ergot  dat  his  mammy  wuz 
a  nigger  'oman.  He  'uz  high  up  one  day,  en 
under  de  strap  de  nex'. 

"  Dat  de  way  wid  Brer  Rabbit.     Des  'bout 


MXS.  PARTRIDGE  HAS  A  FIT.  55 

time  he  git  it  stuck  in  his  min'  dat  dey  ain't 
nobody  kin  outdo  'im,  up  somebody  'd  jump 
en  do  'im  scan'lous.  Dem  what  he  ain't  got 
in  de  cornder  er  his  min',  dey  de  ve'y  ones  what 
make  'im  feel  mighty  umble-come-tumble. 

"  One  time,  when  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  feelin* 
like  he  'uz  high  ez  a  poplar  tree  en  big  aroun' 
ez  a  gin-house,  he  tuck  a  notion  dat  he  want 
some  bird  eggs.  Creeturs  gits  notions  in 
der  heads  same  ez  folks  does,  en  dat  de  kind 
er  notion  Brer  Rabbit  tuck  up.  Nothin  '11  do 
but  he  mus'  have  some  bird  eggs.  Dat  de 
way  he  put  it  down.  He  bleedz  ter  have  bird 
eggs. 

"  He  got  'im  a  basket,  he  did,  en  hung  it  on 
his  arm,  en  sot  out  ter  hunt  urn.  He  tuck  a 
nigh  cut  thoo  de  woods,  en  whiles  he  gwine 
'long  struttin'  en  hummin'  one  er  deze  yer 
sassy  chunes,  he  come  'cross  Miss  Pa'tridge. 
You  done  hear  'bout  Miss  Pa'tridge,  ain't 
you?"  Uncle  Remus  asked,  noting  the  little 
boy's  look  of  surprise.  "  Mos'  any  day  in  de 
week,  en  Sunday  flung  in  fer  good  medjer 
you  kin  hear  um  hollerin'  en  axin'  ole  Bob 
White  ef  his  peas  mos'  ripe,  en  will  'is  dogs 
bite,  speshul  at  night. 

"  Well,  suh,  whiles  Brer  Rabbit  gwine  'long 


56       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

huntin'  bird  eggs,  he  struck  up  wid'  Miss 
Pa'tridge.  She  'd  done  grabbled  a  hole  in  de 
hot  san',  en  she  wuz  settin'  in  it,  flingin'  up 
de  dust  wid  foot  en  wing. 

"  Atter  dey  'd  howdied,  Brer  Rabbit  'low, 
•  What  make  you  waller  in  de  dust  ? ' 

"  Miss  Pa'tridge  say,  '  I  'm  tryin'  ter  gitf 
de  freckles  off.  Where  you  gwine  wid  dat 
baskit?' 

"Brer  Rabbit  'low  he  huntin'  bird  eggs. 
Miss  Pa'tridge  ask  'im  ef  't  ain't  bad  manners 
ter  rob  bird-nesses.  Brer  Rabbit  'low  he  done 
hear  talk  'bout  it,  but  when  a  man  git  hongry, 
he  can't  stan'  on  manners.  Dey  jower'd,  dey 
did,  twel  bimeby  Miss  Pa'tridge  say  dat  ef 
Brer  Rabbit  is  bent  on  robbin'  bird-nesses, 
she  'd  take  en  show  'im  whar  some  wuz ;  en 
wid  dat,  off  dey  put,  Miss  Pa'tridge  leadin'  de 
way. 

"Fust  dey  come  whar  dey  wuz  a  nes'  wid 
two  big  eggs  in  it.  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  'Dat 
ain't  no  bird-nes'.     Dat's  a  hen-nes'.' 

"  Miss  Pa'tridge  wuz  'stonish'd.  She  say, 
'  Lawsy,  Brer  Rabbit,  I  hear  tell  dat  hens  lays 
mo'  dan  two  eggs.' 

"  Dey  went  on,  en  bimeby  dey  come  ter  a 
Guinny-nes'.  Miss  Pa'tridge  'low, i  Dis  is  sho 
'nuff  bird-nes'.' 


MBS.  PARTRIDGE  HAS  A  FIT.  57 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  Ain't  you  got  no  sense, 
Wan  ?  Dis  is  Pot  Rack  nes\  Lemme  go 
'head.     I  '11  fin'  bird-nes'.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  lead  de  way  right  spang  ter 
Miss  Pa'tridge  nes'.  Dis  kinder  flustrate  de 
ole  lady,  but  she  say  ter  herse'f  dat  her  nes'  is 
so  hid  by  de  grass  dat  sholy  Brer  Rabbit 
won't  be  able  ter  fin'  it.  But  Brer  Rabbit 
got  sharp  eyes.  He  see  whar  de  nes'  is,  but 
he  sorter  snuffle  'roun'  en  make  like  he  huntin' 
it. 

"  He  'low,  6  Look  like  I  smell  bird-egg.' 

"  Miss  Pa'tridge  laugh  en  fan  'erse'f  wid  a 
heart-leaf,  en  say,  '  How  de  name  er  goodness 
kin  anybody  smell  bird-egg  ? ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  '  I  '11  show  you ; '  en  wid 
dat  he  unkivered  de  nes',  en  dar  't  wuz  wid  in 
'bout  a  hatful  er  eggs  piled  up  in  it. 

"Miss  Pa'tridge  make  a  great  'miration. 
She  say,  c  Lawsy,  yes !  you  kin  smell  um, 
Brer  Rabbit,  en  who  'd  a  thunk  it? ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  start  ter  put  um  in  his  basket, 
but  Miss  Pa'tridge  sorter  dance  'roun',  she  did, 
en  say,  '  Wait,  Brer  Rabbit,  you  better  lemme 
see  ef  dey  er  good,  kaze  I  done  fergit  mo' 
'bout  bird-eggs  dan  you  ever  know'd.' 

"  Wid  dat  Miss  Pa'tridge  break  one  uv  um 


58       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

en  tas'e  it,  en,  man,  suh !  she  ain't  mo'  'n 
git  it  in  'er  mouf  'fo'  she  fell  over  backerds, 
en  had  de  wuss  kinder  fit.  You  done  see 
chickens  wid  der  head  chop  off.  Well,  Miss 
Pa'tridge  done  wuss'n  dat.  She  flewed  up, 
en  fell  down  en  flutter,  en  scramble  'roun'  in  de 
leaves  twel  Brer  Rabbit  'gun  ter  git  skeered. 
When  Miss  Pa'tridge  ud  sorter  flutter  to'rds 
him,  he  'd  jump  back  en  shake  his  foots  like  a 
cat  does  when  she  git  water  on  um,  en  he  feel 
so  funny  he  'd  whirl  'roun'  en  shake  hisse'f 
when  a  piece  er  grass  tickle  'im  on  de  leg. 

"  When  Miss  Pa'tridge  kin  ketch  'er  breff, 
she  squall  out,  i  Run,  Brer  Rabbit,  run ! 
Dey  er  snake  eggs.  Run,  Brer  Rabbit,  run ! 
Dey  er  rank  pizen  ! ' 

"  When  Brer  Rabbit  hear  dis,  I  let  you 
know  he  put  out  f  um  dar  like  de  dogs  wuz  atter 
'im.  Miss  Pa'tridge  went  off  in  de  bushes  en 
made  anudder  nes',  en  tuck  her  eggs  dar,  en 
sot  down  on  um  en  res'  'erse'f ;  en  sometimes 
when  she  'd  be  noddin'  she  'd  wake  up  en  laugh 
at  de  way  she  fool  ole  Brer  Rabbit. 

"  Maybe  you  '11  be  a-iellin'  dis  tale  some  er 
dese  days,"  Uncle  Remus  went  on,  beaming 
down  on  the  little  boy,  "  en  some  un  '11  whirl 
in  en  'spute  it.     When  dat  de  case,  you  des  ax 


MRS.  PARTRIDGE  HAS  A  FIT.  59 

urn  ter  go  whar  Miss  Pa'tridge  got  'er  lies'  en 
see  ef  she  don't  do  des'  like  she  done  when 
she  fool  Brer  Rabbit.  She  seed  how  it  work 
den,  en  she  done  tell  all  'er  chilluns  dat  dat  de 
bes'  way  ter  do.  En  den,  'pon  top  er  dat,  you 
ax  urn  ef  dey  ever  hear  er  Brer  Rabbit  huntin' 
bird-eggs  sence  dat  time.  Des  ax  urn  dat,  en 
I  boun'  dey  won't  'spute  yo'  word  no  mo'  atter 
dat." 

"  Well,  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  little  boy, 
"  why  does  n't  Brother  Rabbit  hunt  bird 
eggs?" 

"  Kaze  he  skeer'd  he  '11  git  pizened,"  re- 
sponded the  old  man  promptly. 


vni. 

BROTHER   FOX   "  SMELLS   SMOKE." 

One  day  the  little  boy  was  going  through 
the  negro  quarters  yelling  at  the  top  of  his 
voice,  repeating  the  refrain  of  a  nonsense 
song  he  had  heard  the  plough-hands  sing. 

" High,  my  lady !  Brinjer,  ho" 

When  he  came  near  Uncle  Remus' s  house, 
the  old  man  called  out :  — 

"Heyodar?     Who  dat?" 

"  Me  !     It 's  me-me  !     Brinjer,  ho !  " 

"  Well,  I  'clar  ter  gracious  I  'm  glad  er  dat. 
I  low'd  maybe  it  uz  ole  Brer  Rabbit  gwine  by 
sellin'  mustard  poultices.  You  holler  des  like 
'im." 

This,  of  course,  was  a  challenge  to  the  little 
boy  to  ask  for  a  story,  and  he  accepted  it  at 
once. 

"  Shoo  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus,  after  he 
had  teased  the  youngster  awhile.  "  I  done  tol* 
you  dat  tale  too  long  ago  ter  fergit  about." 

But  the  little  boy  protested  so  seriously  that 


BROTHER  FOX  "SMELLS  SMOKE."  61 

the  old  man  settled  himself  back  in  his  chair 
and  began. 

"  Well,  one  time  dey  wuz  a  man,  en  dish 
yer  man  had  a  farm.  He  had  pigs,  en  he  had 
chickens,  en  he  had  ducks.  He  wuz  gwine  on 
farmin',  en  raisin'  pigs  en  ducks  en  chickens, 
twel  bimeby,  one  day,  he  miss  a  pig.  He  ain't 
say  nothin',  en  nex'  day  he  miss  a  chicken. 
Still  he  ain't  say  nothin',  en  de  nex'  day  atter 
he  miss  a  duck. 

"  Den  he  'low,  '  Hi !  what  kinder  doin's  is 
dis?' 

"  He  study  'bout  it,  en  den  he  fix  'im  up  a 
trap,  en  put  a  pig  in  it,  en  set  it  out  by  de 
hoss  lot.  He  ain't  cotch  nothin',  but  he  see 
tracks  'roun'  de  trap. 

"  He  'low,  6  Hey  !  Dish  yer  look  like  Brer 
Fox  been  foolin'  'roun'  here.  I  know  'im, 
kase  de  holler  er  his  foot  makes  a  hole  in  de 
groun.' 

"  Den  he  tuck  de  pig  out  en  put  a  chicken 
in  de  trap.  Nex'  mornin'  he  went  out,  he 
did,  en,  sho'  nuff,  dar  wuz  Brer  Fox  settin' 
in  dar  'long  wid  some  chicken  fedders,  en  he 
look  mighty  umble-come-tumble. 

"De  man  look  at  de  fedders,  en  'low,  'I 
glad  you  brung  yo'  bed  wid  you,  kaze  you  'd 
a  slep'  hard  ef  you  had  n't.' 


62       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Fox,  he  talk  mighty  polite.    He  'low, 


6 1  wish  you  please,  suh,  turn  me  out.  I  wuz 
passin'  by  las'  night  on  my  way  home  f  um  de 
dance,  en  I  heard  a  chicken  hollering  en  flut- 
tering en  I  come  in  fer  ter  see  what  de  matter. 
When  I  got  in,  de  chicken  wuz  done  gone,  en 
den  de  door  shot  tight,  en  here  I  hat  ter  stay.' 

"  Man  say,  '  Ef  dat  chicken  wuz  ter  holler 
now,  I  boun'  he  'd  skeer  you.' 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  '  How  come  ? ' 

"  Man  say,  '  'Kaze  he  so  close  ter  you.' 

"  Man  got  'im  a  rope  en  tied  Brer  Fox 
hard  en  fas'.  He  tied  all  his  foots  tergedder, 
en  den  he  tuck  Brer  Fox  home  en  hung  'im 
up  on  a  nail  in  de  wall,  en  tole  his  ole  'oman 
dat  she  mus'  watch  'im  twel  he  come  home. 
Den  de  man  went  ter  work  in  de  fiel'. 

"  De  man's  wife,  she  watch  en  watch  whiles 
she  shelled  peas.  Den  she  'd  go  en  stir  de 
stew  in  de  pot,  en  come  back  en  watch,  en 
shell  mo'  peas. 

"  Bimeby,  Brer  Fox  say,  l  Look  like  you 
got  a  mighty  heap  er  peas  dar.' 

"  De  'oman  'low,  c  Laws  a  massy,  yes  !  A 
heap  here,  en  a  heap  mo'  ter  come  !  Han's  in 
de  fiel'  got  ter  be  fed.  Lawsy,  yes  !  A  whole 
passel  er  peas,  en  mo'  ter  come  ! ' 


BROTHER  FOX  "  SMELLS  SMOKE."  63 

u  Brer  Fox  say,  '  Ef  you  '11  take  me  down 
en  ontie  me,  I  '11  shell  dem  peas  f er  you,  whiles 
you  er  fixin'  de  rest  er  de  dinner.  Den  you 
kin  tie  me  up  ag'in  en  hang  me  on  de  nail.' 

"  De  'oman,  she  shuck  'er  head,  but  she 
keep  on  studyin'  'bout  it.  Brer  Fox,  he  keep 
on  a-talkin',  en  he  talk  so  saf  en  he  talk  so 
smart  dat  de  'oman  put  it  down  in  'er  min' 
dat  he  ain't  bad  ez  dey  say  he  is.  Den  she 
tuck  Brer  Fox  down  en  ontied  'im,  en  he  lit 
in  ter  shellin'  peas  des  ez  hard  ez  he  kin.  He 
kep'  one  eye  on  de  'oman,  en  de  'oman  she 
kep'  one  eye  eta  him.  De  'oman  stirred  de 
stew  in  de  pot,  en  Brer  Fox,  he  fumble  wid 
de  peas.  De  'oman,  she  sif  de  meal,  en  Brer 
Fox,  he  fumble  wid  de  peas. 

"  Hit  went  on  dis  away,  twel  bimeby  Brer 
Fox  make  a  break  fer  de  door,  but  de  'oman 
'uz  too  quick  fer  'im.  She  slam  de  do',  she' 
did,  en  chase  Brer  Fox  'roun'  de  room  wid 
a  battlin-stick,  en  she  push  'im  so  close  dat 
he  bleedz  ter  run  up  de  chimbley.  Man, 
suh !  dey  wuz  trouble  den  ef  dey  never  wuz 
none  befo'  !  When  Brer  Fox  light  up  de 
chimbley  he  turned  de  pot  er  stew  over,  en 
put  out  de  fier,  en  scald  de  'oman.  She  gun 
a  squall,  she  did,  but  Brer  Fox  done  gone ! 


64       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOT. 

"  'T  wan't  long  fo'  de  man  en  de  fiel'  han's 
come  home  fer  ter  git  der  dinner,  en  when 
dey  fin'  dey  ain't  no  dinner  dar,  den  dey  wuz 
a  rippit.  De  man,  he  jower  en  jower,  en  de 
'oman,  she  tuck'n  cry,  twel  bimehy  she  flew 
mad,  en  den  she  sot  in  ter  jowerin',  en  she 
outjowered  de  man.  She  ax  'im  how  come 
he  ain't  kill  Brer  Fox  while  he  had  'im,  stid- 
der  bringin'  'im  dar  whar  he  kin  cut  up  his 
didos,  en  spile  de  dinner,  en  scald  her  all  on 
de  foots,  en  ruin  her  shoes,  en  put  out  de 
fier  ?  De  man  can't  say  nothin' ;  he  des 
hush  up  en  go  long  'bout  his  business,  hon- 
gry  dough  he  mought  be." 

"  Well,  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  little  boy, 
as  the  old  man  closed  his  eyes  and  leaned 
back  his  head  against  his  chair,  "  did  the 
man  catch  Brother  Fox  ?  " 

"  De  man  ain't  ketch  'im,  but  he  got  kotch. 
When  de  man  lef  his  ole  'oman  a- jowerin'  en 
a-jawin'  at  'im,  he  went  out  in  de  pastur,  en  sot 
on  de  fence.  He  sot  dar,  he  did,  en  he  feel 
mighty  bad.  He  done  plum  outdone.  He 
le'nt  his  head  on  his  han',  en  do  like  some- 
body got  de  jaw-ache.  . 

"  On  top  er  de  hill,  not  so  mighty  fur  fum 
dar,  wuz  de  place  whar  Brer  Rabbit  live  at. 


BROTHER  FOX  "SMELLS  SMOKE:*  65 

He  see  de  man  come  out  en  set  on  de  fence, 
en  he  watch  'im.  De  man  still  set  dar,  en 
Brer  Kabbit  crope  little  closer,  en  watch  'im. 
Bimeby  Brer  Rabbit  come  out  de  bushes  en 
ax  de  man  what  de  matter.  De  man  up  en 
tell  'im ;  en  den  ole  Brer  Rabbit  laugh,  en  say 
he  ain't  know  Brer  Fox  wuz  so  sassy  en  spry. 
He  'low,  '  I  speck  I  '11  hatter  take  'im  down  a 
peg  or  two.  He  been  fightin'  shy  er  me  dis 
long  time.  I  feard  he  bin  studyin'  up  some 
bran  new  tricks.' 

"  Den  Brer  Rabbit  ax  de  man  how  much 
he  '11  gi'  'im  ef  he  '11  make  Brer  Fox  feel  sorry 
en  sore  on  account  er  his  prank.  De  man  say 
he'll  let  Brer  Rabbit  grabble  in  his  goober 
patch,  en  nibble  de  cabbage  des  ez  much  ez 
he  want  ter. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  '  En  you  won't  sic  de 
dog  on  me  ? ' 

"  Man  say,  '  I  won't  sic  de  dog  on  you.' 
a  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  i  It 's  a  bargain.' 
"  Den  ole  Brer  Rabbit  begin  fer  ter  com- 
mence fer  ter  rope  Brer  Fox  in.  He  tell 
de  man  he  mus'  have  some  chicken  gizzuds. 
Man  went  en  got  um.  Den  Brer  Rabbit 
wen'  back  on  de  hill  whar  he  live  at,  en  got 
his  wallet  en  his  walkin'  cane.     In  de  wallet 


66       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

he  put  de  chicken  gizzuds,  en  on  his  walkin' 
cane  he  hung  de  wallet.  Den  he  went  out 
f  er  ter  take  a  walk. 

"  He  ain't  gone  so  mighty  fur  'f o'  he  see 
Brer  Fox  gwine  'long  sniffin'  de  a'r  en  trot- 
tin'  wid  his  head  up  like  a  blin'  hoss.  Brer 
Rabbit  hail  Brer  Fox,  an  ax  'hn  whar  he 
gwine.  Brer  Fox  'spon'  dat  he  ain't  gwine 
nowhars  in  'tic'lar,  en  he  ax  wharbouts  Brer 
Rabbit  gwine  wid  his  walkin'  cane  en  wallet. 
Brer  Rabbit  'spon'  dat  he  huntin'  fer  some- 
body fer  ter  he'p  'im  move  in  some  hay.  All 
dis  time  Brer  Fox  wuz  walkin'  'roun'  en  'roun' 
sniffin'  de  a'r. 

"Bimeby,  he  up'n  'low,  'Brer  Rabbit,  I 
b'lieve  in  my  soul  I  smell  chicken  gizzuds.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  I  'speck  you  does,  Brer 
Fox,  kaze  I  got  um  right  here  in  my  wallet.' 

"  Den  Brer  Fox  jaw  begun  ter  trimble,  en 
he  fair  dribble  at  de  mouf,  kaze  ef  dey  is  any- 
thing on  de  topper  side  er  de  yeth  what  he 
love  mo'  dan  anudder,  't  is  chicken  gizzuds. 

"  He  'low,  '  How  many  is  you  got,  Brer 
Rabbit?' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  c  Some'rs  'twixt  sev'm 
en  'lev'm.' 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  '  What  you  gwine  do  wid 
um,  Brer  Rabbit  ? ' 


BROTHER  FOX  "SMELLS  SMOKE."  67 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  I  gwine  gi'  um  ter  de 
man  what  he'ps  me  wid  my  hay.' 

"  Brer  Fox  jump  up  in  de  a'r,  he  did,  en 
'low,  *  Show  me  de  hay,  Brer  Rabbit !  Show 
me  de  hay !     I'mde  man  what  kin  move  it.' 

"  So  Brer  Rabbit  start  back  de  way  he 
come,  en  Brer  Fox  went  'long  wid  'im.  Brer 
Fox  trot  'long  on  de  side  whar  de  wallet  wuz, 
en  one  time  he  went  ter  look  in  it,  but  Brer 
Rabbit  too  smart  fer  dat. 

"  He  'low,  c  You  kin  look  at  um  when  you 
done  yearned  um,  en  not  a  blessed  minnit 
sooner.' 

"  Well,  't  wan't  long  'f  o'  dey  come  ter  whar 
de  pile  er  hay  wuz.  Brer  Fox  ax  Brer  Rab- 
bit what  he  gwine  do  wid  all  dat  dry  grass,  en 
Brer  Rabbit  say  he  gwine  ter  feed  his  cow 
wid  some,  en  some  he  gwineter  stuff  in  his 
bed  tick.  Dey  sorter  palaver' d,  dey  did,  but 
bimeby  Brer  Fox  he  got  a  good  big  turn  er 
de  ruffage  on  his  back,  en  start  up  de  hill. 
Brer  Rabbit  tuck  out  his  flint  en  steel  en 
struck  it  on  de  hay. 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  '  What  dat  ?  ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  Cricket  hollerin'.' 

"  Den  de  grass  'gun  ter  crackle  en  blaze, 
en  Brer  Fox  low,  <  What  dat  ? ' 


68       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Eabbit  say,  '  Grasshopper  singinY 

"  Brer  Fox,  he  mozey  'long,  he  did,  en 
bimeby  he  'low,  '  I  smell  smoke.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  i  Somebody  burnin'  de 
new  grounY 

"  Atter  while,  Brer  Fox  'low, c  I  feel  mighty 
hot.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  [  Wedder  monst'us  warm.' 

"  'T  wan't  long  'fo'  de  hay  burn  down  en 
Brer  Fox,  he  fetched  one  squall  en  jump  out 
fum  under  it.  He  twis',  he  turn,  he  roll,  he 
jump,  but  't  ain't  do  no  good,  en  den  he  make 
a  break  fer  de  creek.  De  ha'r  done  burnt 
off'n  his  back,  en  de  hide  blistered.  Dat 
what  he  git  fer  tryin'  ter  steal  fum  de  man, 
en  fer  turnin'  over  de  pot  er  stew,  stidder 
waitin'  twel  he  got  a  good  chance  ter  go  out 
de  door.  Ef  he  'd  'a'  done  dat,  he  'd  'a'  saved 
his  manners  en  his  hide  too." 

"  I  think,"  said  the  little  boy,  as  Uncle  Re- 
mus paused  to  fill  his  pipe,  "  that  Brother 
Rabbit  was  very  cruel." 

"  Shoo,  honey,"  exclaimed  the  old  man. 
"  You  might  talk  dat  away  'bout  folks,  but 
creeturs,  —  well,  folks  is  folks  en  creeturs  is 
creeturs,  en  you  can't  make  um  needer  mo' 
ner  less." 


IX. 

BROTHER    FOX    STILL    IN   TROUBLE. 

Uncle  Remus  sat  and  smoked  his  pipe  re- 
flectively for  some  time  after  the  little  boy  had 
criticised  the  heartlessness  of  the  "  creeturs." 
When  he  spoke,  he  showed  that  he  had  been 
thinking  the  matter  over.  He  took  the  pipe 
from  his  mouth  and  blew  a  cloud  of  smoke  in 
the  air. 

"  Uh-uh  !  "  he  exclaimed,  "  't  ain't  no  use 
er  talkin'.  Creeturs  is  creeturs.  You  er  what 
you  is,  en  you  can't  be  no  is-er ;  I  'm  what  I 
am  en  I  can't  be  no  am-er.  It  all  done  been 
fix,  en  I  ain't  see  nobody  yit  what  kin  onfix 
it.  Creeturs  is  natchally  got  ha'sh  idees,  en 
you  may  take  notice  :  wharsomever  you  see 
ha'r  en  bristles,  right  dar  you  er  mo'  dan  ap' 
ter  fin'  claws  en  tushes.  Hit 's  des  like  I  tell 
you,  honey ! 

"  You  flung  me  off'n  de  track,  but  I  ain't 
done  wid  dat  fuss  twix  Brer  Rabbit  en  Brer 
Fox.     You  sorter  flinch'd  kaze  Brer  Rabbit 


70       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

tuck  en  burnt  a  blister  on  Brer  Fox  back,  en 
it  sot  me  ter  studyin' ;  but  we  ain't  come  ter 
de  wuss.  Ef  you  er  too  tetchy  f er  ter  set  dar 
whiles  I  runs  on,  you  kin  des  go  up  ter  de  big 
house  en  watch  Sis  Tempy  fret  over  dat  churn. 
I  hear  'er  quoilin'  now." 

The  only  reply  the  little  boy  made  was  to 
settle  himself  more  firmly  on  the  split-bottom 
chair  in  which  he  was  sitting.  Seeing  which, 
the  old  man  continued :  — 

"  Now,  den,  what  do  Brer  Rabbit  do  atter 
he  scorch  Brer  Fox?  Do  he  go  off  some'rs 
en  set  down  en  mope,  kaze  Brer  Fox  rushed  out 
fum  under  de  burnin'  straw?  Ef  you  t'ink 
he  gwine  do  dat  away,  you  mighty  much 
mistaken.  He  des  ez  restless  ez  he  yever  is 
been.  He  move  'bout  en  he  work  his  min', 
he  jump  'roun'  en  study. 

"  He  got  'im  a  string  er  red  pepper,  en  he 
stewed  it  down  wid  some  hog  fat  en  mutton 
suet.  Den  he  pick  out  de  pepper,  en  when  de 
fat  en  de  suet  git  col'  he  tuck'n  spread  de 
salve  on  a  long  piece  er  rag.  He  tuck  dis  rag, 
he  did,  en  put  it  in  his  wallet,  en  den  he  got 
down  his  walkin'  cane,  en  went  down  de  road 
to'rds  de  place  whar  Brer  Fox  live  at.  He 
ain't  gone  so  mighty  fur  'f o'  he  see  Brer  Fox 


BBOTHEB  FOX  STILL  IN  TROUBLE.         71 

settin'  down  nussin'  hisse'f .  Time  he  see  'im 
Brer  Rabbit  'gun  ter  holler  :  — 

" c  N'yam  !  n'yam  !  'Intment  fer  swellin's ! 
Salve  fer  burns  en  blisters  !     N'yam,  n'yam  ! ' 

"  He  kep'  a-hollerin'  dis  away  des  loud  ez  he 
kin.  He  hoi'  his  head  up  like  he  ain't  see 
Brer  Fox,  en  he  wuz  gwine  on  by,  but  Brer 
Fox  call  'im.  Brer  Rabbit  look  at  'im,  but  he 
ain't  stop.  Den  Brer  Fox  call  'im  ag'in.  Den 
Brer  Rabbit  stop  en  look  mighty  hard. 

"  He  holler  back :  '  What  you  want  'long 
er  me  ?  Ef  't  wan't  kaze  you  got  de  impidence 
er  Ole  Scratch  hisse'f ,  you  would  n't  dast  ter 
have  de  face  ter  hail  me  whiles  I  gwine  'long 
'tendin'  ter  my  own  business.  Talk  quick ! 
I  ain't  got  no  time  fer  ter  fool  wid  yo'  sort ! ' 

"  Den  Brer  Fox  ax'  'im  what  he  so  mighty 
mad  'bout,  en  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  6  Look  how 
you  done  me  'bout  dat  hay.  Ain't  you  say  you 
gwine  ter  fetch  it  on  top  er  de  hill  fer  me  ? ' 

"  Brer  Fox  look  'stonish.  He  say,  c  Name 
er  goodness,  Brer  Rabbit !  You  see  wid  yo' 
own  eyes  what  de  reason  I  can't  fetch  it  up 
dar.  Look  at  my  back,  what  got  a  blister  on 
it  fum  de  top  er  my  head  plum  to  de  een  er 
my  tail !  I  des  like  ter  see  de  man  what  kin 
tote  grass  when  she  git  dat  hot.' 


72       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  look  at  Brer  Fox  back,  en  he 
make  a  great  'miration.  He  'low,  'She  sho 
wuz  hot,  Brer  Fox,  en  you  got  de  marks  un  it. 
I  des  tuck  a  notion  you  wuz  playin'  off  one  er 
yo'  pranks  on  me,  en  my  feelin's  wuz  hurted.' 

"  Brer  Fox  say,  *  I  hear  you  gwine  on  by 
hollerin'  'bout  some  kind  er  'intment  er  nuther 
what  '11  pacify  burns,  en  dat  what  make  I  holler 
at  you.' 

"Wid  dat  Brer  Rabbit  went  down  in  his 
wallet  en  f  otch  out  de  red-pepper  salve,  en  say 
ter  Brer  Fox  dat  he  mus'  git  his  ole  'oinan  fer 
ter  spread  de  plarster  on  de  place  des  soon  ez 
he  kin.  Brer  Fox  tuck  it  en  wobble  off  home 
des  fas'  ez  he  kin.  Brer  Rabbit,  he  f oiler  'long 
out  er  sight,  en  hide  in  de  bushes  whar  he  kin 
see  en  hear  what  gwine  on. 

"Well,  suh,  't wan't  long  'fo'  Brer  Rabbit 
hear  Brer  Fox  fetch  a  squall,  en  he  shot  out'n 
de  house,  en  in  'bout  sev'm  jumps  he  landed 
in  de  creek,  dough  de  creek  wuz  mo'  'n  a  half 
mile  off.  Foxes  is  skeer'd  er  water,  same  ez 
cats,  but  dat  ar  fox,  he  des  roll  en  waller  in 
de  water.  Brer  Rabbit  still  foller  atter,  en 
when  he  git  whar  he  kin  see  Brer  Fox,  he  des 
sot  down  en  hoi'  his  han's  on  his  side  fer  ter 
keep  fum  bustin'  de  buttons  off'n  his  wescut 
wid  laughin'. 


BROTHER  FOX  STILL  IN  TROUBLE.         73 

"Bimeby  he  holler  out,  '  Gracious  good- 
ness, Brer  Fox !  what  de  matter  ?  Is  dat  de 
way  you  goes  a-fishin'  ? ' 

"  Brer  Fox  say :  '  I  'm  ruint,  Brer  Rabbit  I 
You  done  ruint  me !  Dat  er  stuff  you  gi'  me 
is  right  rank  pizen  ! ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  open  his  wallet,  en  look  in  it. 
Den  he  'low :  '  Sholy  I  ain't  gun  you  de  wrong 
physic  !  Lawsy !  yes  I  is !  Stidder  de  n'yam- 
n'yam  'intment,  I  done  gone  en  gun  you  de 
n'yip-n'yip  plarster.  I  b'lieve  'n  my  soul  I  'm 
a-losin'  my  sev'm  senses ! ' 

"  Den  he  sorter  fell  back  in  de  bushes  en 
like  ter  kill  hisse'f  laughin\  Ef  ole  Brer  Fox 
could  er  seed  Brer  Rabbit  rollin'  'bout  in  de 
leaves  en  makin'  de  trash  fly,  he  'd  'a'  made 
sho  dat  he  done  gone  en  got  some  er  de  n'yip- 
n'yip  plarster  on  hisse'f." 

"What  do  n'yam-n'yam  and  n'yip-n'yip 
mean,  Uncle  Remus?"  inquired  the  youngster. 

"Hit's  des  de  name  er  de  physic,  I  speck. 
You  know  yo'se'f  what  quare  names  doctors  is 
got  fer  der  truck.  Dars  ippygag,  en  jollup, 
en  bone-set,  en  burdock,  en  one  thing  en 
ernudder.  De  names  tas'e  bitter,  let  'lone  de 
truck." 

"  Well,  Uncle  Remus,  what  became  of 
Brother  Fox?" 


74        UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"Ef  you  er  anyways  tetchy,  honey,  you 
better  put  yo'  finger  in  yo'  years,  kaze  de 
tale  gits  wuss  en  wuss.  'T  ain't  nothin'  but 
trouble  'pon  top  er  trouble  for  Brer  Fox. 
You  done  got  yo'  ears  plugged  ?  Well,  den, 
atter  so  long  a  time,  Brer  Fox  got  well  er  de 
burn  en  de  blister,  en  he  went  on  'bout  his 
business  same  ez  any  udder  creetur.  He  wuz 
gwine  'long  by  de  river  bank  one  day,  en  he 
hear  a  mighty  hammerin'  not  fur  off,  en  he 
say  ter  hisse'f  dat  he  b'lieve  he  '11  go  see  what 
all  de  fuss  wuz  'bout.  He  went  'long,  he  did, 
en,  bless  gracious!  who  should  he  see  but 
Brer  Rabbit  wid  his  coat  off  en  his  sleeves 
rolled  up,  hammerin'  en  nailin' ;  en  nailin'  en 
hammerin'. 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  '  What  you  doin'  dar,  Brer 
Rabbit?' 

"Brer  Rabbit  say,  'Des  makin'  a  boat, 
Brer  Fox.' 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  *  What  you  want  wid  a 
boat,  Brer  Rabbit?' 

"Brer  Rabbit  say,  'Ter  go  ter  my  fish- 
traps  in.' 

"Brer  Fox  look  'roun',  en  see  planks  en 
scantlin's  a-lyin'  'roun',  en  he  make  up  hi? 
min'  dat   he   ain't  gwine  ter  go  ter  all  dat 


BROTHER  FOX  STILL  IN  TROUBLE.  75 

trouble  des  fer  de  sake  er  one  little  boat.  So 
he  set  on  de  bank  en  fight  san' flies  en  skeeters, 
en  watch  Brer  Rabbit  make  his  boat.  En  he 
ain't  had  ter  wait  long  nudder,  kaze  Brer 
Rabbit,  dough  he  wuz  light  in  de  body,  wuz 
mighty  handy,  en  he  got  his  boat  ready  in  a 
little  er  no  time.  Den  he  got  in  it  en  paddle 
up  de  river,  en  't  wan't  long  'fo'  here  he  come 
back  wid  a  long  string  er  fish. 

"  Dis  make  Brer  Fox  dribble  at  de  inouf , 
kaze  ef  dey  's  any  kinder  vittles  what  he  like 
mo'  dan  any  udder  kind,  it 's  fish.  So  he 
make  up  his  min'  dat  he  bleedz  ter  have  a 
boat.  Den  he  ax  Brer  Rabbit  ef  a  mud  boat 
won't  do  des  good  ez  any  yuther  kind,  en 
Brer  Rabbit  make  answer  dat  while  mud 
boats  might  suit  some  folks,  dey  don't  suit 
him. 

"  Brer  Fox  ain't  got  de  knack  er  makin' 
plank  boats,  en  so  he  say  ter  hisse'f  dat  he 
gwine  ter  show  Brer  Rabbit  dat  some  folks 
know  a  thing  er  two  ez  well  ez  yuther  folks. 
Wid  dat,  he  whirl  in,  en  make  'im  a  boat 
out  'n  clay,  en  when  it  done  got  dry  in  de  sun, 
he  shove  it  out  in  de  water  en  jump  in  wid  his 
paddle. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  dar  wid  his  plank  boat, 


76       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

fer  ter  see  it  well  done,  en  when  Brer  Fox 
start,  he  start  too.  Well,  suh,  hit 's  des  like  I 
tell  you  !  Brer  Fox  ain't  hit  many  licks  wid 
his  paddle  'f  o'  de  mud  'gun  ter  melt ;  de  boat 
went  down,  en  dar  wuz  ole  Brer  Fox  a  scufflin' 
in  de  water.  Atter  so  long  a  time  he  got 
back  ter  de  bank,  but  I  let  you  know  he  ain't 
make  no  mo'  boats,  needer  mud  boats  nor 
plank  boats." 


X. 

WHY  BROTHER  FOx's  LEGS  ARE  BLACK. 

"  Honey,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  shaking  the 
ashes  irom  his  pipe  by  tapping  it  gently  on 
the  hearthstone,  "how  long  sence  you  seed  a 
fox?" 

"  Why,  don't  you  know  papa  brought  two 
home  not  very  long  ago  ?  " 

"  Dat  wuz  las'  fall,"  suggested  Uncle  Re- 
mus. "  One  wuz  a  red  en  tudder  one  wuz  a 
gray.    Ain't  you  notice  how  der  legs  look  ?  " 

The  child  thought  a  moment.  "  Why,  yes," 
he  exclaimed.    "  Their  legs  were  black." 

"  Now,  den,"  said  the  old  man,  leaning 
back  in  his  chair  and  looking  wise,  "  how  come 
dat  ?  Dar  dey  wuz  —  one  fox  red  en  tudder 
fox  gray,  en  yit  der  legs  black.  I  wish  you  'd 
please,  suh,  be  so  good  en  so  kind,  ef  you  got 
der  time  ter  spar',  ter  tell  me  how  come  dey 
bofe  got  black  legs  ?  "  Uncle  Remus' s  tone 
was  that  of  a  humble  seeker  after  knowledge, 


78       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

and  his  earnestness  was  comic  indeed,  though 
it  seemed  to  the  child  to  be  properly  serious. 

"  I  never  thought  of  that/'  said  the  little 
boy.     "  I  can  ask  papa." 

Uncle  Remus  gave  a  derisive  snort,  and  shut 
his  mouth  with  a  snap,  and  began  to  hum  a 
tune  through  his  nose.  It  was  a  sure  sign  of 
displeasure. 

"  Well,  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  child  in  a 
penitent  tone,  "  I  thought  you  wanted  to 
know  sure  enough.  And,  anyhow,  if  you 
don't,  I  do." 

"  Go  ax  yo'  pa,"  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus. 
"  Go  ax  'im.  Ole  nigger  man  like  me  don't 
know  nothin'.     Go  ax  yo'  pa." 

"You  tell  me,"  said  the  child  coaxingly. 
"  If  papa  knows,  he 's  too  busy  to  tell  me  right 


now." 


?  >> 


"He  '11  never  tell  you  in  de  roun'  worl 
remarked  Uncle  Remus  emphatically.  "  He 
dunner  no  mo'  'bout  it  dan  de  man  in  de  moon 
—  ef  dey's  any  man  dar ;  en  ef  dey  ain't  no 
man  dar,  he  dunno  no  mo'  'bout  it  dan  de  man 
what  ain't  dar." 

Then  the  old  negro  made  a  pretense  of 
changing  the  conversation,  but  this  the  little 
boy  would  n't  hear  to. 

"Well,"   Uncle  Remus  said,  after  awhile> 


WHY  BROTHER  FOX'S  LEGS  ARE  BLACK.    79 

"  ef  I  don't  tell  you,  you  '11  pester  me  twel  I 
does  tell  you,  en  so  what  de  odds  ?  'T  ain't  no 
great  tale  nohow,  en  so  I  des  might  ez  well  out 
wid  it,  en  git  some  peace  er  mind. 

"  One  time  Brer  Kabbit  en  Brer  Fox  went 
out  in  de  woods  huntin',  en  atter  so  long  a 
time,  dey  'gun  ter  git  hongry.  Leas'  ways 
Brer  Fox  did,  kaze  Brer  Rabbit  had  brung  a 
ashcake  in  his  wallet,  en  eve'y  time  he  got  a 
chance  he  'd  eat  a  mou'ful  —  eve'y  time  Brer 
Fox  'd  turn  his  back,  Brer  Rabbit  'd  nibble  at 
it.  Well,  endurin'  er  de  day,  Brer  Fox  'gun 
ter  get  mighty  hongry.  Dey  had  some  game 
what  dey  done  kill,  but  dey  wuz  a  fur  ways  f urn 
home,  en  dey  ain't  had  no  fier  fer  ter  cook  it. 

"  Dey  ain't  know  what  ter  do.  Brer  Fox 
so  hongry  it  make  his  head  ache.  Bimeby  de 
sun  gun  ter  git  low,  en  it  shine  red  thoo  de 
trees. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  c  Yonder,  whar  you  kin 
git  some  fier.' 

"  Brer  Fox  say,   '  Wharbouts  ? ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  '  Down  whar  de  sun  is. 
She  '11  go  in  her  hole  terrectly,  en  den  you  kin 
git  a  big  chunk  er  fier.  Des  leave  yo'  game 
here  wid  me,  en  go  git  de  fier.  You  er  de 
biggest  en  de  swiftest,  en  kin  go  quicker. 

"  Wid  dat  Brer  Fox  put  out  ter  whar  de 


80       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

sun  is.  He  trot,  he  lope,  en  he  gallup,  en 
bimeby  he  git  dar.  But  by  dat  time  de  sun 
done  gone  down  in  her  hole  en  de  groun',  fer 
ter  take  a  night's  rest,  en  Brer  Fox  he  can't 
git  no  fier.  He  holler  en  holler,  but  de  sun 
ain't  pay  no  'tention.  Den  Brer  Fox  git  mad 
en  say  he  gwine  ter  stay  dar  twel  he  gits  some 
fier.  So  he  lay  down  topper  de  hole,  en  'fo' 
he  knowed  it  he  drapt  asleep.  Dar  he  wuz, 
en  dar  whar  he  got  kotch. 

"  Now  you  know  mighty  well  de  sun  bleedz 
ter  rise.  Yo'  pa  kin  tell  you  dat.  En  when 
she  start  ter  rise,  dar  wus  Brer  Fox  fas'  asleep 
right  'pon  topper  de  hole  whar  she  got  ter  rise 
fum.  When  dat  de  case,  sump'n  n'er  bleedz 
ter  happen.  De  sun  rise  up,  en  when  she  fin' 
Brer  Fox  in  de  way,  she  het  'im  up  en  scorch 
his  legs  twel  dey  got  right  black.  Dey  got 
black,  en  dey  er  black  ter  dis  ve'y  day." 

"What  became  of  Brother  Rabbit?"  the 
little  boy  asked. 

Uncle  Remus  laughed,  or  pretended  to 
laugh,  until  he  bent  double. 

"  Shoo,  honey,"  he  exclaimed,  when  he 
could  catch  his  breath,  "  time  Brer  Fox  got 
out'n  sight,  Brer  Rabbit  tuck  all  de  game  en 
put  out  fer  home.  En  dar  whar  you  better  go 
yo'se'f." 


XI. 

WHY  BROTHER  BULL  GROWLS  AND  GRUMBLES. 

One  day  as  Uncle  Remus,  assisted  by  the 
little  boy,  was  sorting  out  shucks  and  damp- 
ening them,  for  the  purpose  of  making  horse- 
collars,  a  big  red  bull  went  along  the  public 
road.  He  held  his  head  down,  and  every  few 
steps  he  gave  forth  a  low,  rumbling  bellow. 
Uncle  Remus  looked  at  the  bull,  and  then 
at  the  little  boy,  and  then  shook  his  head 
solemnly. 

"You  hear  dat,  don't  you?  You  hear 
dat  creetur,  gwine  'long  out  dar,  growlin'  en 
grumblin'  en  complainin'  ter  hisse'f?  Well, 
he  got  a  mighty  good  reason  f  er  gwine  on  dat 
away ;  but  who  '11  tell  you  ?  You  may  spit 
on  yo'  thumb  en  turn  over  de  leaves  er  all  de 
books  up  dar  in  Marse  John's  liberry,  yit  you 
won't  fin'  out  in  um.  You  may  ax  Marse 
John,  you  may  ax  Miss  Sally,  you  may  ax 
a  preacher,  yit ;  but  none  un  um  '11  ever  tell 
you.     Den   who    kin   tell    you  ?     Me !     Ole 


82       UNCLE  BEMTJS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

Man  Remus,  de  nigger  what  smell  cake  en  yit 
can't  git  none !  " 

The  little  boy  laughed,  and  drew  forth  from 
his  pocket  a  slice  of  cake.  The  old  man's 
features  lost  something  of  their  severity,  as  he 
took  the  cake  and  placed  it  on  the  plank  that 
served  as  a  mantel. 

"  I  '11  lay  er  up  dar,"  he  remarked,  "  twel 
I  'gin  ter  feel  a  cravin'  in  my  gizzud.  Now, 
den,  lemme  see:  what  pint  wuz  we  'sputin' 
'bout?  We  want  'sputin'  'bout  deze  shucks, 
en  we  wan't  'sputin'  'bout  no  plain  corn-bread. 
I  'clar  ter  gracious !  De  sight  er  cake  natch- 
ally  drives  eve'ything  else  out'n  my  head." 

"  Why,  Uncle  Remus  !  You  were  talking 
about  the  bull  that  went  along  the  road  just 
now,"  said  the  little  boy. 

"  Tooby  sho' !  "  exclaimed  the  old  man. 
"  Look  like  a  bull  is  too  big  fer  ter  be  driv' 
out'n  my  min'  by  a  little  piece  er  cake  like 
dat,  but  dat  des  de  way  it  come  'bout.  Well, 
dat  ar  bull  wuz  gwine  on  by,  grumblin'  en 
a-growlin'.  You  wuz  settin'  right  whar  you 
could  hear  'im  wid  yo'  own  years.  Dat  'zackly 
what  he  wuz  doin'.  Time  I  hear  'im,  it  put 
me  in  min'  er  de  time  when  ole  Brer  Bull 
change   hisse'f  inter  a  man  en  went  'roun' 


r 


WHY  BROTHER  BULL  GROWLS.  83 

courtin.'  Whiles  he  wuz  gwine  on  dis  away, 
he  come  'cross  a  'oman  which  he  like  'er  looks 
mighty  well,  en  seem  like  she  like  him. 

"  Well,  suh,  Brer  Bull,  he  'd  graze*  roun'  in 
de  pastur  all  night,  en  in  de  daytime  he  'd 
turn  ter  be  a  man  en  call  on  de  'oman,  en 
cas'  sheep-eyes  at  'er,  en  tell  'er  right  pine- 
blank  how  purty  she  is.  Hit  kep'  on  dis 
away  twel  bimeby  de  'oman  got  so  she  can't 
do  nothin'  't  all  widout  runnin'  over  in  'er  min' 
'bout  dish  yer  nice  man  what  comin'  courtin.' 
She  can't  skacely  cook  dinner.  She  'd  lif  de 
ladle  f  er  ter  stir  de  pot,  in  hoi'  it  in  de  a'r  a 
minnit,  en  den  —  belingy-bang-dang  I  —  it  'd 
drap  on  de  flo'.  She  can't  keep  'way  fum  de 
lookin'-glass,  a-breshin'  'er  ha'r  en  plasterin' 
down  'er  beau-ketchers. 

"  Now,  den,  dey  wuz  a  little  boy  livin'  dar 
wid  de  'oman.  He  mought  'er  been  some 
bigger  dan  what  you  is,  but  he  wan't  no  older. 
He  wuz  sharp  ez  a  bamboo  brier,  en  his  foot 
wuz  light  en  quick  ez  ole  Brer  Rabbit  hisse'f . 
He  watch  mighty  close.  He  notice  dat  when 
de  man  wuz  courtin',  dey  wan't  no  Brer  Bull 
in  de  pastur,  en  when  dey  wan't  no  man  er 
courtin',  dar  wuz  Brer  Bull  grazin'  'roun'.  He 
got  behime  a  'simmon  tree,  de  little  boy  did, 


84       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

en  watch  how  Brer  Bull  change  hisse'f.  He 
watch,  en  he  see  Brer  Bull  set  down  on  his 
hunkers  des  like  a  dog.  Den  he  'd  shake  his 
head  en  say,  '  Ballybaloo-bill ! '  Wid  dat  his 
horns  'ud  swink,  en  his  tail  'ud  swivel,  en  mos' 
'fo'  you  kin  bat  yo'  eye  dar  he  'd  stan'  change 
inter  a  man.  Den  de  little  boy  'ud  slip  back 
ter  de  house,  en  pick  up  chips  fer  ter  put  on 
de  oven-lid  ter  bake  bread. 

"  Bimeby  de  little  boy  got  so  oneasy  dat  he 
don't  eat  much.  He  wuz  skeerd  de  'oman 
gwine  ter  marry  Brer  Bull.  En  sho'  'nuff, 
dat  des  'zactly  what  de  'oman  laid  off  ter  do. 
When  de  boy  see  dat,  he  des  up'n  tell  de 
'oman  all  'bout  it,  but  stidder  believin'  'im,  she 
got  mad,  en  come  mighty  nigh  snatchin'  'im 
baT -headed.  But  de  boy,  he  watch,  en  keep 
on  watchin',  en  bimeby  he  hear  what  de  man 
say  when  he  change  back  inter  Brer  Bull. 

"  So,  one  day,  whiles  de  man  eatin'  dinnei 
at  de  'oman  house,  de  boy  han'  'roun'  de  vit- 
tles,  en  when  he  come  ter  de  man,  he  say, 
'  Billyh  aloo-bal ! '  De  man  looked  skeerd  en 
put  his  han's  up  ter  his  head,  but  't  ain't  do 
no  good;  he  horns  done  'gun  ter  grow,  en 
hoofs  come  out  on  his  han's  en  foots,  en  de 
cloze  drap  off,  en  mos'  'fo'  de  man  kin  git 


WHY  BROTHER  BULL  GROWLS.  85 

out'n  de  door,  he  done  change  inter  Brer 
Bull,  en  he  curl  his  tail  topper  his  back  en 
rush  out  ter  de  pastur'. 

"  Well,  de  'oman  make  'umble  'polergy  ter 
de  boy,  but  he  rub  hisse'f  in  de  naberhoods  er 
de  coat-tails,  whar  she  spank  'im."  The  old 
man  paused  a  moment,  and  then  went  on :  "I 
been  livin'  'roun'  here  a  mighty  long  time, 
but  I  ain't  never  see  no  polergy  what  wuz 
poultice  er  plarster  nuff  fer  ter  swaje  a  swellin' 
er  kyo  a  bruise.  Now  you  des  keep  dat  in  yo' 
min'  en  git  sorry  'fo'  you  hurt  anybody.  I 
been  takin'  notice  deze  many  long  years  dat 
'  Did  n't~go-ter-do-it '  is  de  ve'y  chap  what  do 
it  all." 

"But,  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  little  boy, 
"  what  became  of  Brother  Bull  and  the  boy 
that  found  him  out  ?  " 

"  Well,  I  tell  you,"  responded  the  old  man, 
"  dat  boy  wuz  name  Simmy-Sam,  en  he  wuz 
mo'  sharper  dan  what  folks  tuck  'im  ter  be. 
His  common  sense  done  tell  'im  dat  atter  he 
make  dat  explosure  'bout  Brer  Bull  he  'd  hat- 
ter keep  his  wedder  eye  open.  So  he  slip  off 
ter  whar  his  mammy  live  at,  en  she  gun  'im  a  lit- 
tle bundle  er  flapjacks,  en  tol'  'im  ter  go  back 
en  'ten'  ter  his  business,  en  keep  out'n  Brer 
Bull's  way. 


86       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"Ole  Brer  Bull  wuz  grazin'  in  de  pastur' 
des  like  nothin'  ain't  happen,  but  he  keep  on 
de  watch.  When  he  'd  see  Simmy-Sam  any- 
whars  out'n  de  yard,  Brer  Bull  'ud  sorter  feed 
to'rds  'im,  but  Simmy-Sam  wan't  talon'  no 
chances,  en  he  kep'  close  ter  kivver.  But 
creeturs  is  mo'  patient-like  dan  what  folks  is, 
en  bimeby  it  got  so  dat  Simmy-Sam  'ud  go 
f urder  en  f urder  f  um  de  house,  en  one  day  de 
'oman  sont  'im  out  in  de  woods  atter  some 
pine  kindlin',  en  he  got  ter  playin'  en  f  oolin' 
'roun'.  You  know  how  chillun  is,  en  how  dey 
will  do:  well,  dat  des  de  way  Simmy-Sam 
done.  He  des  frolicked  'roun'  out  dar  in  de 
brush,  twel  bimeby  he  hear  ole  Brer  Bull  come 
a-rippin'  en  a-snortin'  thoo  de  woods  !  Hit  in 
about  looked  like  his  time  wuz  up." 

"What  did  he  do?"  the  little  boy  asked, 
as  Uncle  Remus  paused  to  search  in  his  pocket 
for  some  tobacco  crumbs.  The  old  man  had 
a  knack  of  holding  the  youngster  in  suspense 
at  a  critical  point  in  a  story. 

"  What  he  do  ?  Well,  suh,  dar  wuz  Simmy- 
Sam,  yonder  wuz  a  tree,  en  here  come  Brer 
Bull.  Now,  in  a  case  er  dat  kind,  what 
Simmy-Sam  gwine  do?  'Fo'  you  kin  ax  de 
question,  he  des  shinned  up  de  tree  like  one  er 


WHY  BROTHEB  BULL  GROWLS.  87 

deze  yer  rusty-back  lizzuds.  Brer  Bull  come  up 
en  hit  de  tree  wid  'is  horns  —  kerblip  !  But 
't  ain't  do  no  good.  He  walk  'roun'  en  switch 
his  tail  en  shake  his  head,  but  Simmy-Sam  des 
laugh  at  'im.  Brer  Bull  back,  he  did,  en  hit 
de  tree  wid  his  horns  —  kerblam!  'T  ain't 
do  no  good. 

"He  kep'  on  dis  away  twel  he  got  plum 
tired,  en  den  he  stop  ter  res'.  Atter  he  got 
his  win'  back,  he  sot  down,  he  did,  en  change 
hisse'f  inter  a  man,  en  de  man  had  a  axe.  Den 
Simmy-Sam  git  skeerd,  kaze  he  know  dat 
when  de  axe  start  ter  talk,  dat  tree  got  ter 
come  down.     De  man  look  up,  en  sorter  grin. 

"  He  low,  '  I  got  you,  is  I  ? ' 

"  Simmy-Sam  say,    '  Yasser,  I  speck  you  is.' 

"  Man  'low,  '  You  better  come  down  en  save 
me  de  trouble  er  cuttin'  down  de  tree.' 

"  Simmy-Sam  say,  '  I  skeerd.' 

"  Man  'low,  '  Skeerd  er  no  skeerd,  you  bet- 
ter come  down.' 

"  Simmy-Sam,  '  Cut  some  fust,  en  lemme  see 
how  it  feel.' 

"  Wid  dat,  de  man  let  in  ter  cuttin'  hard  ez 
he  kin  —  blap  !  blip  !  blip  !  blap  !  'Bout  dat 
time,  Simmy-Sam,  whiles  he  wuz  feelin'  in  his 
pocket  f  er  his  hankcher  so  he  kin  wipe  de  water 


88       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

out'n  his  eyes,  come  'cross  de  little  bundle  er 
flapjacks  what  his  mammy  gi'  'im.  He  onroll 
de  bundle,  en  dey  wuz  three  un  um  in  dar.  He 
tuck  one  un  um,  he  did,  en  drap  it  down  on 
de  man,  en  one  er  de  man's  arms  fall  off.  De 
man  ain't  wait  ter  put  de  arm  back  on ;  he 
des  tuck  de  ax  in  one  han'  en  kep  on  choppin' 
hard  ez  he  kin. 

"  Simmy-Sam  see  dis,  en  he  mak  'ase  en 
drap  anudder  flapjack.  It  no  sooner  drap  dan 
de  man's  tudder  arm  fall  off.  Dar  he  wuz  — 
ain't  got  no  arms,  en  can't  do  no  cuttin'.  Look 
like  nobody  can  be  skeerd  un  'im  when  he  in 
dat  kinder  fix.  But  Simmy-Sam  fear'd  de 
man  kin  run  at  'im  en  fall  topper  'im.  So 
den,  ter  make  sho,  he  drapt  de  las'  flapjack, 
en  de  man  head  fell  off.  Wid  dat,  Simmy- 
Sam  clum  down  de  tree,  en  tuck  is  foot  in  his 
han'  en  put  out  fer  home." 

"His  foot  in  his  hand,  Uncle  Remus?" 
The  little  boy  was  somewhat  perplexed,  and 
the  familiar  saying  struck  strangely  on  his 
ear. 

"  Shoo,  honey !  You  done  hear  me  say 
dat  many  en  many  's  de  time.  When  any- 
body run  fas',  dey  say  he  done  tuck  his  foot  in 
his  han'." 


WHY  BROTHER  BULL  GROWLS.  89 

"Did  the  man  die?"  the  little  boy  in- 
quired. 

The  old  man  laughed  softly  to  himself,  and 
looked  at  the  eager  face  of  the  child. 

"  Why  tooby  sho'  not !  tooby  sho'  not ! 
*T  wan't  no  man.  Ole  Brer  Bull  had  des 
change  hisse'f  inter  a  man,  en  how  kin  it  be  a 
sho'  'nuff  man  ?  Atter  Simmy-Sam  done  got 
out  er  sight,  Brer  Bull  got  his  man  parts  ter- 
gidder  des  like  a  jinted  snake  does,  en  den  he 
change  hisse'f  back  ter  his  own  se'f,  en  he 
done  stay  dat  away,  kaze  he  feard  dat  some 
little  chap  er  nudder  will  come  'long  en  fling  a 
battercake  at  'im. 

"  En  mo'  dan  dat,  he  bin  gwine  'long  fum 
dat  day  ter  dis,  holdin'  his  head  down  en 
growlin'  en  grumblin'  like  sump'n  n'er  done 
hurted  his  feelin's.  En  ef  you  '11  notice  right 
close,  he  don't  like  fer  no  youngsters  fer  ter 
come  foolin'  'roun'  whar  he  stay  at." 

"  What  became  of  Simmy-Sam  ?  "  asked  the 
little  boy. 

"  He  des  grow'd  up,  I  speck,  like  yuther 
chaps.  He  grow'd  up  en  got  ter  huntin'  wil' 
cattle,  kaze  Brer  Bull  sot  'im  ag'in'  all  de 
cattle  kin'.  What  he  done  en  how  he  done 
it,  I  '11  tell  you  some  er  deze  odd-come-shorts 


90        UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

when  I  ain't  got  time  fer  ter  be  ez  busy  ez 
I  '11  hatter  be  fum  dis  on.  I  hear  Miss  Sally 
holler' n'  atter  you  now.  Ef  she  ax  you  whar 
you  been  en  what  you  been  doin',  des  tell  'er 
you  been  down  here  runnin'  on  wid  de  ole 
nigger." 


xn. 

THE  MAN  AND  THE  WILD  CATTLE. 

One  day  Uncle  Remus  saw  the  little  boy 
going  round  the  place  with  a  bow  and  arrow, 
shooting  at  the  chickens  and  everything  that 
came  in  his  way.  The  bow  Uncle  Remus  had 
made  himself,  under  protest,  and  he  had  also 
gathered  a  handful  of  reeds  from  the  swamp 
and  showed  the  enterprising  youngster  how  to 
fashion  them  into  arrows.  The  outfit  was 
crude  and  clumsy  enough,  but  it  was  used  with 
such  unexpected  effect  that  the  old  man  was 
compelled  to  interfere. 

"  I  lay  ef  Miss  Sally  see  you  gwine  on  dis 
away,  she  '11  put  dat  er  bow  behime  de  dum- 
bly, en  she  '11  take  dem  ar  arrers  en  w'ar  um 
out  on  you.  I  boun'  I  ain't  gwine  ter  fix  you 
up  no  mo'  contraptions,  ef  dat  de  way  you  does 
—  massy creein'  de  cats,  en  de  chickens,  en  de 
Lord  knows  what !  " 

"  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  little  boy  quite 
seriously,    "  don't  you  see  I  am  a  wild  In* 


92       UNCLE  EEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

dian  ?  "  He  had  a  half-dozen  feathers  stuck 
in  the  band  of  his  hat.  The  old  man  looked 
at  the  child  and  smiled,  in  spite  of  his  efforts 
to  assume  an  air  of  severity. 

"  What  kinder  Injuns  is  dem,"  he  asked, 
"  what  goes  a  pursuin'  atter  chickens  ?  Ef 
you  er  huntin'  war,  des  go  up  yonder  whar  dat 
ar  Dominicker  hen  got  de  young  chickens ;  go 
up  dar  en  'sturb  'er,  en  ef  she  don't  make  you 
squall,  de  fust  letter  er  my  name  ain't  ole  man 
Remus.  Dey  wuz  a  man  one  time  what  had  a 
bow  en  arrers  dat  done  'im  some  good,  but  dat 
time  gone  by." 

"  Tell  me  about  it,  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the 
little  boy. 

"  Oh,  you  ain't  got  time  for  dat ! "  responded 
the  old  man.  "  You  er  lots  too  busy  !  Go  on 
en  pursue  atter  de  chickens  en  den  atter  de 
cats.  Go  on  !  ef  you  don't  make  'aste  dey  '11 
git  away,  en  den  de  Injun  man  '11  hatter  go 
widout  his  dinner.     Go  on,  Injun  !  " 

But  the  little  boy  put  down  his  bow  and  ar- 
rows, and  remained,  and  after  awhile  Uncle 
Remus  told  him  the  story. 

"  Well,  suh,  one  time  dey  wuz  a  man,  en  he 
live  close  by  a  great  big  woods.  Dey  ain't  no 
woods  'roun'  here  big  ez  what  dat  woods  wuz. 


THE  MAN  AND  THE  WILD  CATTLE.  93 

Git  on  a  swif '  hoss  en  gallop  'im  sev'm  days  en 
sev'm  nights,  en  you  'd  go  ez  fur  ez  de  woods 
wus  wide.  Git  on  de  same  hoss  and  gallop 
'im  under  whip  en  spur  'lev'm  days  en  'lev'm 
nights,  en  you  'd  go  ez  fur  ez  de  woods  wuz 
long.  De  woods  wuz  full  er  horned  cree- 
turs,  en  in  about  all  un  um  wuz  cattle.  Dey 
mought  er  been  some  deer  'mongst  um,  but  de 
big  run  un  um  wuz  horned  cattle.  Dey 
roamed  'roun'  in  de  woods,  crappin'  de  grass, 
en  cuttin'  up  der  capers.  Dey  ain't  had  no 
trouble  'bout  nothin'  'ceppin'  what  de  man 
brung  um. 

u  Now,  dish  yer  man,  he  hunt  de  cattle  f er 
der  hide  en  taller.  He  had  a  bow  en  arrer, 
en  he  had  two  big  dogs,  en  de  cattle  what 
'scape  fum  his  bow  en  arrer  he  'd  ketch  wid 
his  dogs.  Dey  want  no  common  run  er  dogs 
—  dey  wuz  big  ez  a  good  size  calf,  —  en  dey 
wuz  mo'  servigrous  dan  a  pant'er.  Dey  wor- 
ried de  horned  creeturs  constant.  One  on  um 
wuz  name "  — 

"  Minny  -  Minny  -  Morack  !  "  exclaimed  the 
little  boy,  "  and  the  other  was  named  Folla- 
malinska ! " 

"  Lord-a-massy,  honey  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle 
Remus,  pretending  to  be  astonished.  "  Who 
toleyoudat?" 


94       UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Don't  you  know  you  told  me  about  the 
little  boy  in  the  tree  that  called  his  dogs  to 
kill  the  leopard  woman  ?  " 

The  old  negro  threw  his  head  back  and 
laughed.     After  awhile  he  went  on. 

"  Well,  suh,  dat  little  boy  what  I  been  tell 
you  'bout,  he  grow'd  up,  en  come  ter  be  a 
hunter :  en  dem  two  dogs,  dey  grow'd  'long 
wid  'im,  en  dey  got  wuss  dan  dey  wuz  when 
dey  kil't  de  'oman  —  lots  wuss.  So  he  hunt 
de  cattle,  en  de  dogs  kill  um  scan'lous. 

"  It  went  on  dat  away  twel  bimeby  de  wil' 
cattle  helt  a  meetin'  f  er  ter  git  up  some  kinder 
plan  ter  make  way  wid  de  man.  De  onliest 
way  dey  kin  do  is  ter  fix  it  so  dey  kin  ketch 
de  man  by  hisse'f .  Dey  study  en  study,  but 
dey  dunner  how  dey  gwine  ter  fetch  dat  about. 
De  dogs  wuz  in  de  way.  Ef  dey  kin  git  de 
man  by  hisse'f,  dey  kin  run  in  on  'im  en  hook 
'im  inter  jiblets,  but  ef  de  dogs  'long  wid  'im, 
den  dey  git  kil't  deyse'f .   So  dey  study  en  study. 

"  Bimeby  a  nice  young  cow,  white  ez  snow, 
say  she  gwine  ter  try  a  trick.  She  'low  she 
gwine  ter  change  inter  a  young  'oman  en  make 
'im  marry  'er.  Den  she  say  she  '11  swade  'im 
ter  stay  home  long  ez  she  kin,  en  when  she 
can't  swade  'im  no  longer,  den  she  '11  take  en 


THE  MAN  AND  THE  WILD  CATTLE.  95 

tie  de  dogs  so  dey  can't  go  'long  wid  'im  when 
he  go  huntin',  en  den  de  horned  creeturs  kin 
cloze  in  on  'im  en  make  way  wid  'im.  De 
Brindle  Cow  shuck  'er  head  en  'low,  '  Oh-ho  ! ' 
en  de  Dun  Cow  switch  'er  tail  en  'low,  '  Ah- 
ha  ! '  en  dat  de  way  dey  settle  it. 

"  So  den,  de  nex'  time  de  man  start  fer  ter 
go  huntin',  he  come  'cross  a  young  'oman  in 
de  woods.  She  wuz  a  likely  lookin'  gal,  mon  ! 
—  des  ez  purty  ez  red  shoes  wid  blue  strings 
in  um.  De  man  he  look  at  'er,  he  did,  en  de 
gal,  she  look  back  at  'im,  en  den  dey  bofe  look 
at  one  anudder." 

"  That  was  the  white  cow,  was  n't  it,  Uncle 
Remus  ?  "  asked  the  little  boy. 

"  Tooby  sho'  't  wuz,  honey !  "  exclaimed  the 
old  man,  warming  up  to  the  story  ;  "  't  wan't 
nobody  else  in  de  roun'  worl'.  She  des  went  en 
change  'erse'f  bodaciously  f um  a  cow  en  come 
ter  be  a  likely  young  'oman.  How  she  done  it, 
I  'U  never  tell  you,  but  de  creeturs  in  dem  days 
wuz  des  ez  mischievious  ez  dey  could  be ;  dey 
wan't  no  eend  ter  der  tricks.  Des  ter  set  here 
en  chat  about  it,  it  don't  seem  like  dat  a  cow 
kin  change  'erse'f  twel  she  come  ter  be  a 
'oman,  but  dar  she  wuz  right  'f  o'  de  man's  two 
eyes,  en  how  you  gwine  git  roun'  dat  ?  Dat 
what  I  'd  like  ter  know ! 


96        UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Now,  den,  dar  wuz  de  likely  young  'oman, 
en  dar  wuz  de  man.  De  'oman,  she  hilt  'et 
head  down  like  she  'shame;  en  de  man,  he 
stood  dar,  he  did,  en  make  sheep-eyes  at  'er. 
Well,  you  know  how  't  is  when  folks  do  dat 
away.  Atter  'while,  de  man,  he  sorter  sidle  up 
ter  de  young  'oman  en  ax  'er  ef  she  '11  have  'im, 
en  de  young  'oman,  she  tuck'n  chaw  on  'er  bon- 
net string,  en  'low  dat  she  ain't  know  nothin' 
contrary  ter  de  question.  Dat  de  way  wim- 
min  folks  say,  i  Yasser,  en  thanky  too  ! '  Den 
dey  went  off  en  got  married,  en  de  man  took 
de  young  'oman  home,  en  dey  sot  up  house- 
keepin'. 

"  De  man  sorter  drapt  his  huntin'  atter  dat. 
Look  like  he  sorter  los'  de  appetite  fer  killin' 
de  wil'  cattle  fer  der  hide  en  taller.  His  bow 
en  arrer  wuz  put  up  on  de  shelf,  en  he  stayed 
'roun'  de  house.  De  dogs  ain't  know  what 
ter  make  er  dis  ;  dey  wonder  en  wonder  what 
de  matter  is,  en  some  days  dey  'd  stan'  on  de 
door-sill  en  look  at  de  man  en  whine.  All  dis 
time  de  wil'  cattle  wuz  roamin'  in  de  woods, 
grazin',  en  cuttin'  up  der  capers. 

"  Bimeby  de  man  'gun  ter  hone  fer  ter  go 
huntin',  en  one  night  he  tuck'n  tol'  de  young 
'oman  dat  he  bleedz  ter  go  huntin'  de  nex' 


THE  MAN  AND  THE  WILD  CATTLE.  97 

flay.  So,  'fo'  day  de  nex'  mornin',  de'  oman 
went  out  en  tied  de  dogs  hard  en  fas',  en  den 
crope  back  ter  bed.  De  man,  he  got  up,  he 
did,  en  fried  him  a  rasher  er  meat,  en  drapt 
a  pone  er  cornbread  in  his  wallet,  en  den  he 
put  out  fer  ter  hunt  de  wiP  cattle.  He  ain't 
pay  no  'tention  ter  de  dogs,  kaze  he  been  in 
de  habits  er  gwine  a-huntin'  widout  'em,  en 
when  he  need  um  right  bad,  he  'd  des  holler 
en  call  um.  No  matter  how  fur  off  he 
mought  be,  he  'd  des  put  his  han'  ter  his 
mouf  en  holler  :  — 

u  f  Minny-Minny  Morack  !  Follamalinska  ! 
Here,  boys,  here  !  ' 

"  Some  er  de  wiP  cattle  seed  'im  a-comin', 
en  dey  went  en  tole  de  yuthers,  en  den  de 
whole  drove  tuck  ter  der  heels  en  made  off  e? 
hard  ez  dey  could.  De  man  follow'd  der 
tracks,  en  dis  wuz  'zackly  what  dey  want. 
Dey  wanter  toll  de  man  des  ez  fur  in  de 
woods  ez  dey  kin.  Bimeby  he  come  on  um 
in  one  er  deze  yer  big  open  places,  like  de 
clay  galls  you  see  in  a  pine  thicket.  Dar  de 
wil'  cattle  tuck  der  stan',  en  dey  wuz  so  many 
un  um  it  look  like  dey  fair  swarmed  all  over 
de  face  er  de  yeth. 

"  Den  de  man  draw'd  his  bow  en  let  fly  his 


98       UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

arrers,  en  called  his  dogs  ez  loud  ez  he  could. 
He  lissen  fer  de  dogs,  but  de  mo'  he  lissen  de 
mo'  he  ain't  hear  urn,  en  he  keep  shootin'  at 
de  cattle  en  callin'  de  dogs,  twel  he  ain't  got 
but  three  arrers  lef.  Den  de  wil'  cattle  put 
der  heads  down  en  histed  der  tails  in  de  a'r, 
en  come  er  rushin'  at  'im  same  ez  a  harry- 
cane.  De  big  ole  bulls  Uow,  lOo-hoo!  Now 
we  got  you  ! '  en  de  cows  dey  holler,  'Ma-hah  I 
Now  we  git  yd*  hide  en  taller  !  ' 

"  But  des  'bout  dat  time  de  man  tuck  one 
er  de  arrers  what  he  got  lef  en  stuck  it  in  de 
groun',  en  'fo'  you  kin  say  Jack  Robinson 
wid'  yo'  mouf  open,  de  arrer  grow'd  to  be  a 
great  big  tree,  wid  de  man  straddlin'  de  top 
lim's.  Dis  make  de  wil'  cattle  feel  'stonish, 
en  den  dey  got  mad  en  run  at  de  tree  en  hook 
it  twel  der  horns  got  sore.  Den  dey  pawed 
up  de  groun'  en  beller,  des  like  de  cows  does 
when  dey  smell  fresh  beef  blood.  But 't  ain't 
do  no  good,  —  dar  de  tree  wuz,  en  dar  she 
stood. 

"  Den  some  er  de  wil'  cattle  put  out  en  got 
some  axes,  en  'gun  ter  cut  de  tree  down,  en 
it  look  like  mighty  skeery  times  fer  de  man. 

"  Settin'  in  de  top  er  de  tree,  he  call  his 
dogs,  'Minny-Minny  Morack  !  Follamalirv 
ska  !    Here,  boys,  here  ! ' 


THE  MAN  AND   THE  WILD  CATTLE.  99 

"  Down  at  de  bottom  er  de  tree  de  wil' 
cattle  dey  chop  en  chop,  '  Blam  !  blip-blip- 
blam  !  Blip-blip-blam  !  blam  !  Blam-blam- 
blam  !     Blip-blip-blam  ! ' 

"  Co'se  no  tree  can't  stan'  dat  kinder  doin's, 
en  dis  un  'gun  ter  git  shaky.  De  man  call 
de  dogs,  en  dey  ain't  come  !  De  axes  call  de 
tree,  en  bimeby  down  she  come !  Time  she 
struck  de  groun'  de  man  stuck  anudder  arrer 
in  de  groun',  en  up  it  grow'd  bigger  dan  tud- 
der  one. 

"  De  man  he  call  his  dogs,  i  Minny-Minny 
Morack  !  Follamalinska  !  Here,  boys, 
here  ! ' 

"  De  axes  dey  call  on  de  tree,  ( Down ! 
down !  Dip-dip-down !  Down-dip !  Dip- 
down  !     Dippy-dip  !     Dippy-down  !  ' 

"  De  dogs  ain't  come,  but  de  tree  come,  en 
de  man  des  had  time  f  er  ter  stick  his  onliest 
arrer  in  de  groun'  'f o'  de  wil'  cattle  swarmed 
in  on  'im.  De  arrer  grow'd  up  bigger  en 
bigger  dan  de  yuthers.  In  de  top  de  man 
sot  en  call  de  dogs  louder  en  louder,  en  at  de 
butt  de  wil'  cattle  cut  harder  en  harder. 

"Now  all  dis  time,  de  dogs  hear  de  man 
callin',  en  dey  pull  at  de  ropes  en  tug  at  um 
hard  ez  dey  kin,  but  de  ropes  big  en  strong. 


100    UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  TEE  LITTLE  BOY. 

De  man,  he  call,  en  de  dogs,  dey  tug.  Bime* 
by  dey  sot  in  ter  gnyawin',  en  des  'fo'  de  las' 
tree  fell  dey  gnyaw'd  de  ropes  in  two.  Man, 
suh  !  When  dey  did  git  loose,  dey  des  come 
a  callyhootin'  !  De  man  hear  urn  comin',  en 
he  call  louder.  De  wiT  cattle  hear  um  comin', 
en  dey  cut  harder. 

"  De  man  call,  i  Minny-Minny  Morach  ! 
Follamalinska  !     Come,  hoys,  come  ! ' 

"  De  axes  talk, 6  Tree-down  !  Tree-down  ! 
Trip-trip-tree-down  ! ' 

"  Bimeby,  des  ez  de  tree  come  down  Tcer- 
blashity-blam  !  de  dogs  rush'd  up.  De  man 
sik't  um  on,  en  dey  wuz  so  mad  dat  dey 
stroy'd  mighty  nigh  all  de  wil'  cattle.  Atter 
dey  done  kil't  all  dey  could,  de  man  seed  a 
snow  white  cow  layin'  mongst  de  res'.  De 
hide  wuz  so  nice  dat  he  save  it  f  er  hisse'f . 

"  He  went  back  home,  but  his  wife  done 
gone,  en  he  ain't  never  see  'er  twel  dis  day. 
He  ain't  know  nothin'  'tall  'bout  de  white 
cow." 


XIII. 

BROTHER   RABBIT  FRIGHTENS  BROTHER  TIGER. 

"  'T  ain't  de  biggest  en  de  strongest  dat 
does  de  mostest  in  dis  world/'  said  Uncle 
Remus  one  day,  when  lie  and  the  little  boy 
were  talking  over  matters  and  things  in  gen- 
eral. The  little  boy  had  been  talking  about 
the  elephant  and  the  tiger  which  he  had  seen 
in  a  traveling  menagerie,  and  he  had  asked 
the  old  man  why  the  elephant  was  so  strong 
and  the  tiger  so  fierce. 

"No,  honey,  don't  let  nobody  fool  you 
'bout  dat.  De  cuckle-burr  got  needer  life 
ner  lim',  yit  when  it  git  in  de  sheep  wool  it 
kin  travel  fast  ez  de  sheep,  you  know  dat 
yo'se'f .  De  elephen'  may  be  strong ;  I  speck 
he  is  ;  en  de  tiger  maybe  servigrous  ez  dey  say 
he  is ;  but  Brer  Rabbit  done  outdone  bofe 
un  urn." 

"  How  was  that,  Uncle  Remus  ?  "  the  little 
boy  asked. 

"  Well,  he  done  it  so  easy,  honey,  dat 't  ain't 


102    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

skacely  no  tale.  'T  ain't  nothin'  dat  '11  'ston 
ish  you,  en  't  ain't  nothin'  dat  '11  make  you 
laugh.  Hit 's  des  some  er  Brer  Rabbit's 
eve'y-day  doin's,  des  like  you'd  set  down  tei 
eat  a  plain  dinner  er  pot-liquor  en  dumplin's. 
wid  no  pie  fer  ter  take  de  greasy  tas'e  out'n 
yo*  mouf." 

The  youngster  wanted  to  hear  about  it  any- 
how, and  he  said  so.  Whereupon  Uncle  Re- 
mus continued :  — 

"  One  time,  whiles  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  gwine 
'long  thoo  de  woods,  he  struck  up  wid  Brer 
Tiger.  'Twan't  nowHrs  'bout  here,  honey," 
explained  the  old  man,  observing  the  child's 
look  of  astonishment.  "  'T  wuz  in  some  er 
de  'jinin'  counties.  Brer  Rabbit  struck  up 
wid  Brer  Tiger,  he  did,  en  atter  dey  passed 
de  time  er  day,  dey  went  amblin'  long  ter- 
gedder.  Brer  Rabbit  talk  so  big  en  walk  so 
uppity  dat  Brer  Tiger  look  at  'im  sideways 
en  grin.  Bimeby  dey  come  ter  whar  der  wuz 
a  creek,  en  dey  want  no  foot-log  in  sight. 
Brer  Tiger  ain't  want  ter  wet  his  feet  no  mo' 
dan  a  cat  do,  en  needer  do  Brer  Rabbit,  en  so 
dey  went  up  de  creek  huntin'  fer  a  foot-log. 
Dey  go,  en  go,  but  dey  ain't  fin'  none. 

"Bimeby  Brer  Rabbit  'low  he  know  how 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER  TIGER.    103 

fcer  cross.  Brer  Tiger  ax  'im  how.  Den  Brer 
Rabbit  grab  a  grape-vine  hangin'  fum  de  tree 
lim',  en  tuck  a  runnin'  start  en  swung  hisse'f 
on  tudder  side.  When  he  tu'n  de  vine  loose, 
it  flew  back  ter  whar  Brer  Tiger  wuz,  en  Brer 
Tiger  he  cotch  holt  en  made  f  er  ter  swing  his- 
se'f 'cross.  Time  he  done  lef  de  groun'  good, 
de  vine  broke,  en  he  come  down  on  his  back 
in  de  creek,  kersplash  ! 

"  Co'se  dis  make  'im  feel  bad,  en  when  he 
crawl'd  out  en  shuck  hisse'f,  en  see  Brer 
Rabbit  settin  up  dar,  dry  en  clean,  a-laughin' 
fit  ter  kill,  hit  make  'im  feel  wuss.  He 
fetched  er  growl  er  two,  en  popped  his  mouf 
tergedder,  but  Brer  Rabbit  kep'  one  eye  on 
im. 

"Brer  Tiger  'low,  'How  come  you  ain't 
skeer'd  er  me,  Brer  Rabbit  ?  All  de  yuther 
creeturs  run  when  dey  hear  me  cominY 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  6  How  come  de  fleas  on 
you  ain't  skeer'd  un  you  ?  Dey  er  lots  littler 
dan  what  I  is.' 

"  Brer  Tiger  'low,  '  Hit 's  mighty  good  fer 
you  dat  I  done  had  my  dinner,  kaze  ef  I  'd 
a-been  hongry  I  'd  a-snapped  you  up  back  dar 
at  de  creek.' 

"  Brer   Rabbit   say,  '  Ef  you  'd  done  dat, 


104    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

you  'd  er  had  mo'  sense  in  yo'  hide  dan  what 
you  got  now.' 

"  Brer  Tiger  'low,  c  I  gwine  ter  let  you  off 
dis  time,  but  nex'  time  I  see  you,  watch  out ! ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say, '  Bein  's  you  so  monst'us 
perlite,  I  '11  let  you  off  too,  but  keep  yo'  eye 
open  nex'  time  you  see  me,  kaze  I  '11  git  you 
sho.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  talk  so  biggity  dat  Brer 
Tiger  put  on  his  studyin'  cap,  en  he  make  up 
his  min'  dat  dey  ain't  room  'nuff  in  dat  county 
fer  bofe  him  en  Brer  Rabbit.  Brer  Tiger 
turn  'roun',  he  did,  en  watch  Brer  Rabbit  go 
tippin'  off,  en  he  look  so  little  en  so  sassy  dat 
it  make  Brer  Tiger  mad.  Hit  make  'im  so 
mad  dat  he  kotch  holt  uv  a  tree  en  clawed 
mos'  all  de  bark  off'n  it.  Bless  gracious  !  de 
f urder  he  git  fum  Brer  Rabbit,  de  mo'  mad- 
der he  got.  He  des  declar'  dat  de  nex'  time 
he  strike  up  wid  Brer  Rabbit  he  gwine  ter 
gobble  'im  up  widout  sayin'  grace. 

"  So,  den,  dar  'twuz,  Brer  Tiger  'ginst  Brer 
Rabbit,  en  Brer  Rabbit  'ginst  Brer  Tiger  : 
one  big,  en  tudder  one  little ;  one  servigrous 
fum  de  word  go,  en  tudder  one  got  needer 
tush  ner  claw.  Hit  look  mighty  bad  fer  Brer 
Rabbit !    Well,  I  wish  ter  goodness  you  could 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER   TIGER.    105 

er  seed  'im  'bout  dat  time.  He  went  'long 
thoo  de  woods  ez  gay  ez  a  colt  in  a  barley- 
patch.  He  wunk  at  de  trees,  he  shuck  his  fis- 
ties  at  de  stumps,  he  make  like  he  wuz  quoilin' 
wid  'is  shadder  kaze  it  foller  'long  atter  'im 
so  close ;  en  he  went  on  scan'lous,  mon  ! 

Brer  Babbit  ain't  gone  so  mighty  fur  'fo' 
he  hear  a  big  noise  in  de  bushes,  en  lo  en  be- 
holes,  dar  wuz  ole  Brer  Elephen  trompin' 
'roun'  en  th'ashin'  out  de  tops  er  de  saplin's. 
He  look  big  ez  a  young  house,  but,  bless  yo' 
soul !  dat  ain't  set  Brer  Rabbit  back  none. 
He  des  march  up  en  ax  ole  Brer  Elephen  how 
he  come  on,  en  one  word  led  to  anudder,  twel 
Brer  Rabbit  up'n  tell  ole  Brer  Elephen  all 
'bout  de  confab  what  he  been  had  wid  Brer 
Tiger.  Den  he  'low  dat  ef  ole  Brer  Elephen 
will  loan  'im  a  helpin'  han'  dey  kin  drive 
Brer  Tiger  bodaciously  out'n  de  county.  Ole 
Brer  Elephen  flop  his  years  en  shake  his 
snout  like  he  sorter  jubious. 

"  He  'low,  '  I  ain't  gwine  ter  git  hurted,  is 
I,  Brer  Rabbit?' 

"Dis  make  Brer  Rabbit  roll  his  eyes  en 
study. 

"  He  ax, ' Who  de  name  er  goodness  gwine 
hurt  you,  Brer  Elephen  ? ' 


106    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Elephen  'low, '  Brer  Tiger  got  sharp 
claws  en  long  tushes.  I  skeer'd  he  bite  me 
en  scratch  me.' 

"Brer  Rabbit  say,  ''Cordin'  ter  dat  I 
oughter  be  skeer'd  uv  a  flea,  kaze  des  ez  I  kin 
sqush  a  flea,  des  dat  away  you  kin  sqush  Brer 
Tiger.  Yit  dey  ain't  gwine  be  no  squshin' 
done.  Ef  you'll  do  what  I  tell  you,  we'll 
des  take'n  run  Brer  Tiger  out'n  de  county. 
Goodness  knows,  ef  my  upper  lip  wuz  long 
en  limber  like  yone,  I  'boun'  I  'd  a  done  got 
rid  er  Brer  Tiger  long  'f  o'  now  ! ' 

"  Brer  Elephen,  he  'gree  ter  do  what  Brer 
Rabbit  say,  but  he  flop  his  years  en  work  his 
snout  like  he  mighty  restless  in  de  min',  en 
Brer  Rabbit  holp  'im  up  de  best  way  he  kin 
wid  biggity  talk. 

"  Soon  nex'  mornin'  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  up  en 
a-movin'.  He  done  had  eve'y thing  fix,  en 
he  sot  'roun'  in  de  bushes  whar  he  kin  see 
Brer  Tiger  long  ways  off.  Bimeby  he  see 
Brer  Tiger  come  sidlin'  down  de  path,  en  no 
sooner  is  Brer  Rabbit  seed  'im  dan  he  make 
a  break  en  run  ter  whar  Brer  Elephen  stan- 
nin'.  Den  Brer  Rabbit  tuck  en  wrop  a  long 
vine  'roun'  one  er  ole  Brer  Elephen's  behime 
legs,  en  den  'roun'  a  tree.     He  fix  it  so  dat 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER  TIGER.    107 

anybody  passin'  'long  would  make  sho'  de  leg 
tied  hard  en  fas'.  Den  ole  Brer  Elephen 
kneel  down,  en  Brer  Rabbit  tuck  a  runnin' 
start  en  light  up  on  his  back.  Dey  done  had 
all  de  'rangements  made,  en  when  Brer  Tiger 
come  'long,  he  seed  a  sight  dat  make  'im  open 
his  eyes.  Dar  wuz  Brer  Rabbit  on  top  er 
ole  Brer  Elephen  back,  en  dar  wuz  ole  Brer 
Elephen  wid  his  behime  leg  tied  ter  de  tree, 
a-swingin'  backerds  en  forrerds,  en  a-rockin' 
f  um  side  ter  side. 

"  Brer  Tiger  look  at  um  a  little  while,  en 
de  notion  strike  'im  dat  Brer  Rabbit  wuz 
cotch  up  dar  en  can't  git  down.  Dis  make 
Brer  Tiger  laugh  twel  he  show  all  his  tushes. 
He  walk  'roun',  he  did,  en  feel  so  good  he  rub 
hisse'f  'ginst  de  saplin's  des  like  you  seen  cats 
rub  up  'ginst  cheer-legs.  Den  he  sot  down 
flat  er  de  groun'  en  grin  at  Brer  Rabbit,  en 
lick  his  chops.  Ole  Brer  Elephen  swing  back- 
erds en  forrerds,  en  rock  fum  side  to  side. 

"  Brer  Tiger  'low,  '  I  tole  you  I  'd  git  you, 
Brer  Rabbit,  en  now  I  done  come  atter  you.' 

"  Brer  Elephen  swing  backerds  en  forrerds, 
en  rock  fum  side  ter  side. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say, e  You  done  come,  is  you  ? 
Well,  des  wait  a  minnit  twel  I  git  thoo  skin- 


108    UNCLE  EEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

nin'  dis  creetur  what  I  des  cotch.  Stay  dai 
twel  I  git  good  en  ready  fer  you.' 

"  Den  Brer  Rabbit  dip  down  his  head  by 
ole  Brer  Elephen's  year  en  whisper,  '  Squall 
when  I  put  my  nose  on  yo'  neck.  Don't  be 
skeer'd.     Des  squall.' 

"Den  ole  Brer  Elephen  squeal  thoo  dat 
snout  er  his'n;  you  mought  er  heerd  'im  a 
mile  er  mo'. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  holler  out,  i  Des  wait,  Brer 
Tiger.  Yo'  turn  '11  come  terreckly.  It  '11 
go  mighty  hard  wid  you  ef  I  hatter  run  atter 
you.' 

"  Ole  Brer  Elephen  swing  backerds  en  f or- 
rerds,  en  rock  fum  side  ter  side.  Eve'y  time 
Brer  Rabbit  'd  nibble  behime  his  years,  he  'd 
squall  out  en  tromple  de  groun'. 

"When  he  fus'  seed  Brer  Rabbit  up  dar 
on  ole  Brer  Elephen's  back,  Brer  Tiger  sorter 
sot  hisse'f  on  de  groun'  fer  ter  make  a  jump 
at  'im,  but  time  he  see  how  ole  Brer  Elephen 
hollerin'  en  prancin',  Brer  Tiger  riz  en  'guy 
ter  back  off.  A  hick'y  nut  fell  off'n  a  tree  en 
hit  de  groun',  en  Brer  Tiger  jump  like  some- 
body shot  at  'im.  When  Brer  Rabbit  see  dis, 
it  tickle  'im  so  dat  he  come  mighty  nigh 
laughin'    out  loud.      But   he   dip   his   head 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER  TIGER.    109 

down,  en  make  like  he  gnyawin'  ole  Brer  Ele- 
phen  on  de  neck,  an  ole  Brer  Elephen,  he 
squall  loud  ez  he  kin. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  prance  up  en  down  on  Brer 
Elephen  back  like  he  huntin'  fer  a  mo'  tender 
place,  en  holler  out :  — 

" 6  Don't  go  'way,  Brer  Tiger.  Des  wait ; 
I  '11  be  ready  fer  you  terreckly.' 

"  Brer  Tiger  he  back  off,  en  Brer  Elephen 
swing  backerds  en  forrerds,  en  rock  fum  side 
ter  side,  en  squeal  thoo  his  snout. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  holler  out,  i  No  use  ter  git 
weak-kneed,  Brer  Tiger.  Gi'  me  time.  Dis 
Elephen  blood  tas'e  salty.  It  make  me  dry. 
You  won't  have  long  ter  wait.' 

"  Brer  Tiger,  he  back  off  en  back  off.  Brer 
Rabbit,  he  make  out  he  bitin'  ole  Brer  Ele- 
phen on  de  year.  Ole  Brer  Elephen  swing 
backerds  en  forrerds,  en  rock  fum  side  ter 
side,  en  snort  en  tromple  de  grass. 

"  'Bout  dat  time  Brer  Rabbit  make  like  he 
gwine  ter  come  down.  He  make  like  he 
huntin'  fer  a  saft  place  ter  jump,  en  when 
Brer  Tiger  see  dat,  he  made  a  break  en  des 
fell  over  hisse'f  tryin'  ter  get  out'n  reach. 
Brer  Rabbit  holler  at  'im,  but  he  ain't  stop ; 
ke  des  keep  a-runnin',  en  't  wuz  many  a  long 


110     UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

day  'fo'  de  creeturs  seed  'im  back  dar  in  dat 
settlement. 

"  Elephen  skeer'd  er  tiger/'  Uncle  Kemus 
went  on,  by  way  of  explanation.  "En  all 
de  time  dat  Brer  Rabbit  wuz  talkin'  ter  Brer 
Tiger,  Brer  Elephen  wuz  so  skeer'd  dat  a 
little  mo  'n  he  'd  'a'  went  tarin'  thoo  de  woods 
like  a  harrycane.  Ez  'twuz,  des  ez  soon  ez 
Brer  Tiger  got  out'n  sight,  old  Brer  Elephen 
retched  up  wid  his  snout  en  wrung  de  top 
off'n  er  saplin'  en  'gun  ter  fan  hisse'f  wid 
it." 

"  Uncle  Remus,"  said  the  little  boy,  when 
the  old  man  had  brought  the  story  to  a  close, 
"  did  you  ever  see  an  elephant  ?  " 

"  Well,  suh,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  after  a 
long  pause,  "  you  tetch  me  in  a  tender  place, 
you  sho'ly  does.  I  seed  um,  en  I  ain't  seed 
um.     Now,  how  kin  you  make  dat  out  ?  " 

"How  could  that  be?"  asked  the  child, 
laughing. 

"  I  tell  you  now,  dey  ain't  no  fun  in  it," 
continued  the  old  negro,  trying  to  frown.  "  I 
done  hear  talk  dat  dey  wuz  a  show  gwine  ter 
come  'long  de  road,  on  de  way  ter  town,  but 
it  drapt  out'n  my  min',  twel  one  day  I  wuz 
vidin'  dat  ar  roan  mule,  takin'  a  letter  over 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER   TIGER.    Ill 

ter  Marse  Bill  Little's.  I  went  on,  I  did,  en 
tuck  de  note  en  start  back  wid  de  answer. 
Marse  Bill  Little  had  done  gi'  me  a  dram  fer 
ole  'quaintance  sake,  en  I  wuz  warm  in  my 
feelin's.  Dat  ar  roan  mule  des  paced  'long 
free  en  easy,  en  dey  want  no  happier  nigger 
dan  what  I  wuz. 

"  Well,  suh,  I  heard  a  little  fuss  in  front  er 
me,  en  I  raise  my  head,  en  right  dar  at  me, 
right  spang  'pon  topper  me,  wuz  a  great  big 
elephen.  I  des  got  a  glimpse  un  'im,  kaze 
de  roan  mule  seed  'im  time  I  did,  en  she  des 
give  a  squat  en  a  flutter,  en  de  nex'  thing  I 
know'd  my  head  wuz  driv  in  de  groun'  in 
about  up  ter  my  neck.  I  dunner  how  long  I 
laid  dar,  but  time  I  got  de  mud  en  grit  out'n 
my  eyes  de  elephen  wuz  done  gone.  You  may 
say  I  seed  de  elephen,  er  you  may  say  I  ain't 
seed'  im;  I  ain't  gwine  ter  'spute  'bout  it. 
But  dat  ar  roan  mule  seed  im." 


XIV. 

BROTHER   BILLY   GOAT   EATS   HIS   DINNER. 

One  Saturday  afternoon,  Uncle  Eemus  was 
sitting  in  the  door  of  his  cabin  enjoying  the 
sunshine,  while  the  little  boy  was  mending,  or 
trying  to  mend,  a  small  wagon  with  which  he 
had  been  playing.  It  was  a  half  holiday  on 
the  plantation,  and  there  were  several  groups 
of  negroes  loitering  about  the  quarters.  Or- 
dinarily the  little  boy  would  have  been  inter- 
ested in  their  songs  or  in  the  drolleries  that 
were  passing  from  lip  to  lip,  and  from  group 
to  group;  but  now  he  was  too  busy  with 
his  broken  wagon.  The  old  man  watched 
the  child  through  half  closed  eyes,  and  with 
a  smile  that  was  grim  only  in  appearance. 
Finally,  seeing  that  the  little  chap  was  grow- 
ing impatient,  Uncle  Kemus  cried  out  with 
some  asperity,  — 

"  What  you  doin'  longer  dat  waggin  ?  Gi' 
me  here  !  Fus'  news  you  know,  you  won't  have 
no  waggin." 


BROTHER  BILLY  GOATS  DINNER.         113 

The  little  boy  carried  it  to  the  old  man  very 
readily. 

"  Sump'n  the  matter  wid  de  runnin'  gear/' 
Uncle  Remus  remarked.  "  I  dunnerhow  come 
it  got  any  runnin'  gear.  If  you  had  a  i'on 
waggin,  it  would  n't  las'  you  twel  termorrer 
night." 

Just  at  that  moment,  Big  Sam  happened  to 
get  into  an  angry  dispute  with  Becky's  Bill. 
Big  Sam  was  almost  a  giant,  but  Becky's  Bill 
had  a  free  mind  and  a  loud  tongue,  and  he 
made  a  great  deal  more  noise  than  Sam.  This 
seemed  to  irritate  Uncle  Remus. 

"  Hush  up,  you  triflin'  vilyun !  "  he  said. 
"  You  talk  bigger  dan  de  Billy  Goat  did." 

The  other  negroes  laughed  at  this,  and 
Becky's  Bill  soon  dropped  the  quarrel,  which 
was  not  hard  to  do,  seeing  that  Big  Sam  was 
saying  very  little.  The  allusion  to  the  Billy 
Goat  attracted  the  attention  of  the  little  boy. 
He  felt  sure  there  was  a  story  somewhere  be- 
hind it,  and  when  Uncle  Remus  had  finished 
his  wagon,  he  began  to  investigate  it. 

"  What  did  the  Billy  Goat  talk  about  ?  " 
he  asked. 

"  Go  en  break  yo'  waggin  ;  you  gwine  ter 
break  it  anyhow,  en  you  des  ez  well  go  now." 


114    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  I  won't  break  it  any  more,  Uncle  Remus," 
said  the  little  boy.  "  I  'm  going  to  grease  it 
and  put  it  away.  What  did  the  Billy  Goat 
talk  about  ?  "  " 

"  He  talked  'bout  deze  yer  little  chaps  what 
pesters  folks  constant,  en  he  say  dey  better 
quit  der  'havishness  en  Tarn  how  ter  don't. 
Dat  what  he  say." 

"  Now,  Uncle  Remus,  you  know  that  is  n't 
what  the  Billy  Goat  said." 

"  Well,  he  ought  ter  say  it  if  he  ain't,"  re- 
marked the  old  man. 

The  shrewd  youngster  placed  himself  in 
the  attitude  of  a  listener  and  patiently  waited. 
Uncle  Remus  watched  him  a  moment.  Then 
he  shook  his  head  and  said  resignedly :  — 

"  You  sho'  does  bang  my  time.  You  er 
wuss'n  Brer  Rabbit." 

The  little  boy  blushed  and  smiled  at  this, 
for  he  regarded  it  as  a  high  compliment. 

"  Yasser,"  Uncle  Remus  went  on,  U  wuss'n 
Brer  Rabbit  —  lots  wuss.  Hen  can't  cackle 
widout  you  wanter  see  what  kinder  egg  she 
lay ;  ole  Brer  Billy  Goat  can't  take  a  chaw  ter- 
backer  in  jue  season  widout  you  want  ter  know 
what  he  talkin'  'bout.  En  ef  dey  is  any  tale 
'bout  Brer  Billy  Goat,  't  ain't  no  good  tale  fer 


BROTHER  BILLY  GOATS  DINNER.         115 

chilluns,  kaze  dey  might  take  a  notion  dat  big 
talk  is  de  right  kinder  talk,  en  when  dey  take 
dat  notion,  somebody  got  ter  frail  'em  out  wid 
a  bresh  broom." 

The  little  boy  said  nothing,  but  sat  listen- 
ing. 

"  I  mighty  fear'd  you  '11  hatter  skuzen  me," 
Uncle  Remus  remarked,  after  a  pause.  "  Look 
like  my  'membunce  wobblin'  'roun'  like  a  hoss 
wid  de  blin'  staggers.  Yit,  nigh  ez  I  kin  git 
at  all  de  ins  en  outs  er  dish  yer  tale  what  we 
been  talkin'  'bout,  dey  wuz  one  time  when 
Brer  Wolf  wuz  gwine  lopin'  'roun'  de  settle- 
ment feelin'  mighty  hongry.  He  want  some 
vittles  fer  hisse'f,  en  he  want  some  fer  his 
fambly,  yit  it  seem  like  he  can't  fin'  none  no- 
whars.  He  talk  wid  Brar  B'ar,  en  he  hear 
tell  dat  shote  meat  mighty  good,  but  he  can't 
fin'  no  shote;  he  hear  tell  dat  goat  meat 
mighty  good,  but  he  can't  fin'  no  goat. 

"  But  bimeby,  one  day  whiles  he  gwine  'long 
de  road,  he  seed  a  big  rock  layin'  in  a  fiel',  en 
on  top  er  dish  yer  rock  wuz  Brer  Billy  Goat. 
'T  wan't  none  er  deze  yer  little  bit  er  rocks ; 
it  'uz  mighty  nigh  ez  big  ez  dish  yer  house, 
en  ole  Brer  Billy  Goat  wuz  a-standin'  up  dar 
kinder  ruminatin'  'bout  ol'  times.     Brer  Wolf 


116     UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

loped  up,  he  did,  en  made  ready  f er  ter  see 
what  kinder  tas'e  goat  meat  got.  Yit  he  took 
notice  dat  Brer  Billy  Goat  wuz  ehawin'  away 
like  he  eatin'  sump'n.  Brer  Wolf  sorter  wait 
awhile,  but  Brer  Billy  Goat  wuz  constant 
a-chawin'  en  a-chawin'.  Brer  Wolf  look  en 
he  look,  but  Brer  Billy  Goat  keep  on  a-chawin* 
en  a-chawin'. 

"  Brer  Wolf  look  close.  He  ain't  see  no 
green  grass,  he  ain't  see  no  shucks,  he  ain't 
see  no  straw,  he  ain't  see  no  leaf.  Brer  Billy 
Goat  keep  on  a-chawin'  en  a-chawin'.  Brer 
Wolf  study,  but  he  dunner  what  de  name  er 
goodness  Brer  Billy  Goat  kin  be  eatin'  up  dar. 
So  bimeby  he  hail  'im. 

"  He  'low,  sezee,  '  Howdy,  Brer  Billy  Goat, 
howdy.  I  hope  you  er  middlin'  peart  deze 
hard  times  ? ' 

"  Brer  Billy  Goat  shake  his  long  beard  en 
keep  on  a-chawin'. 

"  Brer  Wolf  'low,  sezee,  '  What  you  eatin', 
Brer  Billy  Goat  ?  Look  like  it  tas'e  mighty 
good.' 

"  Brer  Billy  Goat  'low,  i  I  'm  a-eatin'  dish 
yer  rock ;  dat  what  I  'm  a-eatin'.' 

"  Brer  Wolf  make  answer,  '  I  'm  mighty 
hongry  myself,  —  but  I  don't  speck  I  kin  go 
dat.' 


BROTHER  BILLY  GOATS  DINNER.         117 

"  Brer  Billy  Goat  'low,  c  Come  up  whar  I 
is,  en  I  '11  break  you  off  a  hunk  wid  my 
horns.' 

"  Brer  Wolf  say,  sezee,  dat  he  mighty  much 
erbleege,  but  he  speck  he  hatter  be  gittin' 
'long,  en  he  'low  ter  hisse'f,  *  Ef  Brer  Billy 
Goat  kin  eat  rock  like  dat,  I  speck  I  better  go 
'long  en  let  'im  'lone.' 

"  Brer  Billy  Goat  holler  at  'im  en  say,  sezee, 
e  Ef  you  can't  clime  up  Brer  Wolf,  I  kin  come 
down  dar  en  help  you  up.  De  rock  whar  I  is 
is  mo'  fresher  dan  dat  down  dar.  It  's  some 
harder,  but  it 's  lots  mo'  fresher.' 

"  But  Brer  Wolf  ain't  stop  ter  make  an- 
swer. He  des  kep'  a-gwine.  He  tuck  it  in 
his  head  dat  if  Brer  Billy  Goat  kin  eat  rock 
dat  away,  't  won't  do  ter  fool  'long  wid  'im, 
kaze  ef  a  creetur  kin  eat  rock,  he  kin  eat  what- 
somdever  dey  put  'fo'  im." 

"  What  was  Brother  Goat  chewing  ?  "  asked 
the  little  boy. 

"  Nothin'  't  all,  honey.  He  wuz  des  chawin' 
his  cud  en  talkin'  big,  en  I  done  seed  lots  er 
folks  do  dat  away  —  niggers  well  ez  white 
folks." 


XV. 

THE    KING   THAT   TALKED    BIGGITY. 

Uncle  Eemus  paused,  leaned  his  head  side- 
wise  on  his  hand,  and  regarded  the  little  boy 
intently.  After  awhile  he  closed  his  eyes 
slowly  and  remarked  :  - — 

"  I  speck  maybe  you  done  git  de  idee  dat 
biggity  talk  goes  a  mighty  long  ways.  Well, 
den,  you  des  well  ter  git  dat  idee  out'n  yo* 
head.  De  bluffin'  man  is  mos'  sholy  gwine 
ter  git  bluffed  —  dey  ain't  no  two  ways  'bout 
dat.  Brer  Billy  Goat  tuck'n  bluff  Brer  Wolf, 
but  spozen  Brer  Wolf  had  de  sense  what  he 
oughter  bin  bo'n  wid  ?  Man,  suh !  he'd  a 
made  mince-meat  out'n  Brer  Billy  Goat  'fo* 
you  kin  wink  yo'  fingers  en  wiggle  yo'  eyeleds. 
You  hear  de  fuss  what  dat  ar  Becky's  Bill  wuz 
a-makin'  des  now  ?  Well,  ef  Big  Sam  had  'a' 
made  at  'im,  he  'd  'a'  galloped  off  bellerin'  like 
a  calf. 

"  Dat  put  me  in  min'  er  de  time  when  dey 
wuz  a  king  some'rs.     Hit  mought  er  bin  'roun* 


THE  KING  THAT  TALKED  BIGGITY.         119 

here,  er  it  mought  er  bin  back  up  dar  in  Fer- 
ginny;  no  matter  'bout  dat,  hit  uz  some'rs. 
Dat  ar  king  wuz  one  er  deze  yer  ole  timey 
kings.  He  bin  settin'  up  dar  kingin'  over  um 
so  long  dat  his  ha'r  done  drap  out,  en  his  toofies 
got  loose,  en  his  han'  shake  wid  de  palsy. 
When  de  folks  see  dat,  dey  say  dat  it 's  in 
about  time  for  dat  king  ter  stop  kingin',  en 
let  some  yuther  somebody  do  some  kingin'. 
But  de  ole  king  he  helt  on,  like  tick  on  a 
cow.     He  des  kep'  on  a-kingin'. 

"Bimeby  de  folks  git  tired,  en  dey  meet 
tergedder  en  choosen  a  n'er  king.  De  ole 
king  ax  who  is  he ;  but  de  folks  'fuse  ter  give 
his  name  out.  Dey  fear'd  de  ole  king  gwine 
ter  whirl  in  en  make  way  wid  'im.  De  ole 
king  ax  is  he  ole  man.  De  people  'spon'  dat 
he  older  dan  some  folks,  en  lots  younger  dan 
some  yuthers.  Kaze  he  mighty  mean  man,  en 
dey  know  dat  ef  dey  tell  'im  dey  done  choosen 
a  ole  man,  he  '11  sen'  out  en  have  all  de  ole 
folks  kil't ;  en  ef  dey  tell  'im  dey  done  gone  en 
choosen  a  young  man,  dey  know  he  '11  never  res' 
tell  he  done  massycreed  all  de  young  people. 
Yasser  !  Dat  'zackly  de  kinder  man  what  he 
wuz,  en  dem  folks  what  he  been  kingin'  over, 
dey  know  dat  dey  hatter  step  mighty  thin  ef 
dey  want  to  keep  der  hides  whole. 


120     UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Den  you  oughter  hear  dat  ole  king  talk 
biggity.  He  des  fa'rly  poun'  de  groun'.  He 
rip,  he  rave,  he  fume,  he  fret.  Yit  't  ain't  do 
no  good.  Dar  wuz  de  folks,  en  dey  des  stood 
der  groun'  en  kep'  der  eye  on  'im.  Bimeby 
de  ole  king  sorter  cool  down.  He  seed 't  wan't 
no  use  fer  ter  be  cuttin*  up  no  didos,  so  he 
pick  up  his  hat  en  his  hankcher  whar  he  done 
drap  um,  en  got  back  on  de  whatzisname." 

"  On  his  throne  ?  "  the  little  boy  suggested. 

"  I  speck  so,  honey,"  responded  Uncle  Re- 
mus, with  a  laugh.  "  He  got  back  on  de 
place  whar  dey  set  when  dey  do  der  kingin', 
en  he  'low,  sezee :  — 

" '  You  all  got  de  idee  dat  kaze  I  'm  ole  en 
shaky  dat  I  ain't  got  no  sense,  but  I  'm  des 
a-gwine  ter  show  you.  Go  en  tell  de  man 
what  you  done  choosen  dat  'f  o'  he  kin  be  king 
he  got  ter  sen'  me  a  beef.  'T  ain't  got  ter  be 
no  bull,  en  't  ain't  got  ter  be  no  cow.  When 
he  do  dat,  he  kin  be  king ;  kaze  den  I  '11  know 
he  got  sense  'nuff  fer  ter  do  de  kingin'  fer 
you  all  des  same  ez  I  bin  doin'  it.' 

"De  folks  look  at  one  anudder  en  shake 
der  heads,  en  den  dey  go  off  en  hoi'  a  confab. 
Dey  dunner  what  dey  gwine  to  do.  De  man 
what  dey  choosen  fer  ter  be  der  new  king  wuz 


THE  KING  THAT  TALKED  BIGGITY.        121 

a  young  man,  en  dey  skeerd  he  can't  do  what 
de  ole  king  say.  Bimeby  some  un  urn  went 
en  broke  de  news,  en  de  young  man  sorter 
raise  his  head  en  wink  one  eye.  He  'low, 
sezee :  — 

"  '  Go  back  en  tell  de  ole  king,  dat  I  got  a 
fine  steer  fattenin'  in  my  pens,  but  he  got  ter 
come  git  'im ;  but  he  ain't  got  to  come  in  de 
day  ner  needer  in  de  night.' 

"  When  de  folks  hear  dis,  it  make  um  feel 
sorter  holp  up,  en  dey  went  back  en  tole  de 
ole  king  what  de  young  man  say.  He  sot 
dar,  he  did,  en  sorter  study,  en  scratch  his 
head.  Den  he  ax  um  ef  dey  be  so  good  ez  ter 
gi'  'im  a  chaw  terbacker.  He  tuck  a  big 
chaw,  en  den  he  pick  up  his  hat  en  his  cane, 
en  grab  his  kyarpet-bag,  en  tell  'um,  c  So 
long.' 

"Now,  den,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  after  a 
pause,  "  what  good  is  it  do  dat  man  f  er  ter 
talk  his  biggity  talk  ?  I  wish  somebody  be  so 
good  ez  ter  tell  me  dat." 


XVI. 

BROTHER   RABBIT'S    MONEY   MINT. 

One  day  the  little  boy  was  telling  Uncle 
Remus  about  how  much  money  one  of  his 
mother's  brothers  was  going  to  make.  Oh, 
it  was  ever  so  much  —  fifty,  a  hundred,  may 
be  a  thousand  bales  of  cotton  in  one  season. 
Uncle  Remus  groaned  a  little  during  this  re- 
cital. 

"Wharbouts  he  gwine  ter  make  it?"  the 
old  man  inquired  with  some  asperity. 

"  Oh,  in  Mississippi,"  said  the  little  boy. 
"  Uncle  James  told  papa  that  the  cotton  out 
there  grows  so  high  that  a  man  sitting  on  his 
horse  could  hide  in  it." 

"  Did  Marse  Jeems  see  dat  cotton  hisse'f  ?  " 
asked  Uncle  Remus. 

"  Yes,  he  did.  He  's  been  out  there,  and 
he  saw  it  with  his  own  eyes.  He  says  he  can 
make  ever  so  many  hundred  dollars  in  Missis- 
sippi where  he  makes  one  here." 

"  Marse  John  ain't  gwine,  is  he  ?  " 


BROTHER  RABBITS  MONEY  MINT.        123 

"  No ;  I  heard  papa  tell  mamma  that  Uncle 
James  was  drawing  his  long  bow,  and  then 
mamma  said  she  reckoned  that  her  kinfolks 
were  as  truthful  as  anybody  else's." 

Immediately  Uncle  Remus' s  features  lost 
their  severity,  and  he  lay  back  in  his  chair  to 
laugh. 

"  Dat  Miss  Sally,  up  en  down.  Hit  her  kin- 
nery  en  you  got  ter  hit  her.  But  yo'  pa  know 
Marse  Jeems,  en  I  been  knowin'  'im  sence  he 
wuz  in  his  teens ;  en  when  he  git  ter  talkin* 
he  '11  stretch  his  blanket  spite  er  de  worl'.  He 
allers  would  do  dat,  en  he  allers  will.  Now, 
dat  des  de  long  en  de  short  un  it.  I  don't 
keer  ef  he  is  kin  ter  Miss  Sally,  he  '11  talk  wil\ 

"  Bless  yo'  soul,  honey.  I  done  hear  talk 
er  Massasip  long  'fo'  you  wuz  bornded.  I 
done  seed  um  go  dar,  en  I  done  seed  um  come 
back,  en  eve'y  time  I  hear  folks  talk  'bout 
makin'  mo'  money  off  dar  dan  dey  kin  any- 
whars  nigher  home,  it  put  me  in  min'  er  de 
time  when  Brer  Fox  went  huntin'  de  place 
whar  dey  make  money." 

"Is  it  a  story,  Uncle  Remus?"  asked  the 
little  boy. 

"  Well,  't  ain't  ez  you  may  say  one  er  deze 
yer  reg'lar  up  en  down  tales,  what  runs  cross- 


124     UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

ways.  Dish  yer  tale  goes  right  straight 
Brer  Fox  meet  up  wid  Brer  Rabbit  in  de  big 
road,  en  dey  pass  de  time  er  day,  en  ax  one  er 
nudder  how  der  fambly  connection  is.  Brer 
Fox  say  he  sorter  middlin'  peart,  en  Brer  Rab- 
bit say  he  sorter  betwix  '  My  gracious  ! 9  en 
i  Thank  gracious  !  '  Whiles  dey  er  runnin' 
on  en  confabbin',  Brer  Fox  hear  sump'n  rat- 
tlin'  in  Brer  Rabbit's  pocket. 

"  He  'low,  '  Ef  I  ain't  mighty  much  mis- 
taken, Brer  Rabbit,  I  hear  money  rattlin'.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  sorter  grin  slow  en  hoi'  his 
head  keerless. 

"  He  say,  '  'T  ain't  nothin'  much  —  des 
some  small  change  what  I  bleedz  ter  take  wid 
me  in  de  case  er  needcessity.' 

"  Wid  dat  he  drawed  out  a  big  han'ful  er 
speeshy-dollars,  en  quarters,  en  sev'mpunces, 
en  thrips,  en  all  right  spang-bang  new.  Hit 
shined  in  de  sun  twel  it  fair  blin'  yo'  eyes. 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  '  Laws  a  massy,  Brer 
Rabbit !  I  ain't  seed  so  much  money  sence 
I  sol'  my  watermilions  las'  year.  Ain't  you 
skeerd  some  un  '11  fling  you  down  en  take  it 
'way  f um  you  ? ' 

"Brer  Rabbit  say,  'Dem  what  man  'nuff 
ter  take  it  kin  have  it  5 '  en  he  des  strut  'long 


BROTHER  RABBITS  MONEY  MINT.        125 

de  road  dar  mo'  samer  dan  one  er  deze  yer 
milliumterry  mens  what  got  yaller  stripes  on 
der  britches. 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  '  Whar  de  name  er  good- 
ness you  git  so  much  new  speeshy,  Brer 
Babbit?' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  I  git  it  whar  dey  make 
it  at ;  dat  whar  I  git  it.' 

"  Brer  Fox  stop  by  de  side  er  de  road,  en 
look  'stonish.  He  low,  '  Wharbouts  does  dey 
make  dish  yer  speeshy  at  ? ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  Fust  in  one  place  en 
den  in  anudder.  You  got  ter  do  like  me, 
Brer  Fox ;  you  got  ter  keep  yo'  eye  wide 
open.' 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  '  Fer  massy  sake,  Brer 
Rabbit,  tell  me  how  I  gwine  ter  fine  de  place.' 

"  He  beg  en  he  beg,  Brer  Fox  did,  en  Brer 
Rabbit  look  at  'im  hard,  like  he  got  some 
doubts  on  his  min'.  Den  Brer  Rabbit  sot 
down  by  de  side  er  de  road  en  mark  in  de  san' 
wid  his  walkin'  cane. 

"  Bimeby  he  say,  '  Well,  spozen  I  tell  you, 
you  '11  go  blabbin'  it  'roun'  de  whole  neigh- 
borhoods, en  den  dey  '11  git  it  all,  en  we  won't 
git  none  't  all.' 

"  But  Brer  Fox  des  vow  en  declar'  ter  gra- 


126     UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BQY. 

cious  dat  he  won't  tell  a  livin'  soul,  en  den  ole 
Brer  Babbit  sorter  bent  hisse'f  back  en  cle'r 
up  his  th'oat. 

"  He  say,  t  'T  ain't  much  atter  you  fine  it 
out,  Brer  Fox ;  all  you  got  ter  do  is  ter  watch 
de  road  twel  you  see  a  waggin  come  'long.  Ef 
you  '11  look  right  close,  you  '11  see  dat  de  wag- 
gin,  ef  hit  7s  de  right  kind  er  waggin,  is  got 
two  front  wheels  en  two  behime  wheels;  en 
you  '11  see  f uddermo'  dat  de  front  wheels  is 
lots  littler  dan  de  behime  wheels.  Now,  when 
you  see  dat,  what  is  you  bleedz  ter  b'lieve  ? ' 

"  Brer  Fox  study  little  while,  en  den  shuck 
his  head.  He  'low,  '  You  too  much  fer  me? 
Brer  Rabbit.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  look  like  he  feel  sorry  kaze 
Brer  Fox  sech  a  numbskull.  He  say,  i  When 
you  see  dat,  you  bleedz  ter  b'lieve  dat  atter 
so  long  a  time  de  big  wheel  gwine  ter  ketch  de 
little  one.  Yo'  common  sense  ought  ter  tell 
you  dat.' 

"  Brer  Fox  'low,  ( Hit  sholy  look  so.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  K  Ef  you  know  dat  de  big 
wheel  gwine  ter  ketch  de  little  wheel,  en  dat 
bran  new  money  gwine  ter  drap  fum  betwixt 
um  when  dey  grind  up  'ginst  one  anudder, 
what  you  gwine  do  den  ? ' 


BROTHER  RABBITS  MONEY  MINT.        127 

"  Still  Brer  Fox  study,  en  shake  his  head. 
Brer  Rabbit  look  like  he  gittin'  sick. 

"  He  say,  '  You  kin  set  down  en  let  de  wag- 
gin  go  on  by,  ef  you  don't  want  no  bran  new 
money.  Den  agin,  ef  you  want  de  money, 
you  kin  foller  'long  en  keep  watch,  en  see 
when  de  behime  wheels  overtake  de  front  uns 
en  be  on  han'  when  de  money  starts  ter  drap- 
pin  . 

"  Brer  Fox  look  like  he  got  de  idee.  He 
sorter  laugh. 

"Brer  Rabbit  say,  <Nex'  time  you  see  a 
waggin  gwine  by,  Brer  Fox,  des  holler  for  me 
ef  you  don't  want  ter  take  no  chances.  Des 
bawl  out !  I  ain't  got  'nuff  speeshy,  en  I 
ain't  gwine  ter  have  'miff.' 

"  Brer  Fox,  he  broke  off  a  broom  straw  en 
'gun  ter  chaw  on  it,  en  des  'bout  dat  time, 
dey  hear  a  waggin  comin'  'cross  de  hill. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  { Des  say  de  word,  Brer 
Fox,  en  ef  you  ain't  gwine  'long  atter  de  wag- 
gin, I  '11  go  myse'f  ! ' 

"Brer  Fox  say,  i Maybe  de  wheels  done 
grinded  tergedder  back  yonder  a  piece.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  'low,  '  I  ain't  got  time  ter 
'spute,  Brer  Fox.  Ef  you  ain't  gwine,  des  say 
de  word ! ' 


128    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Fox  sorter  laugh  like  he  shame.  He 
say,  '  I  b'lieve  I  '11  go  a  little  piece  er  de  way 
en  see  how  de  wheels  run.' 

"  Wid  dat,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  looking  up 
at  the  ceiling  with  a  peculiar  smile,  "Brer 
Rabbit  wish  Brer  Fox  good  luck,  en  went  on 
'bout  his  business.  Yit  he  ain't  go  so  fur  dat 
he  can't  watch  Brer  Fox's  motions.  At  de  rise 
er  de  nex'  hill  he  look  back,  en  dar  he  see  Brer 
Fox  trottin'  'long  atter  de  waggin.  When  he 
see  dat,  Brer  Rabbit  des  lay  down  in  de  grass 
en  kick  up  his  heels  en  holler." 

Uncle  Remus  laughed,  and  the  little  boy 
laughed.  The  old  negro's  merriment  was  as 
keen  as  that  of  the  youngster,  for  his  humor 
swept  over  a  wide  field  of  human  experience. 
The  little  boy  laughed  at  the  transparent  trick ; 
Uncle  Remus  no  doubt  beheld  in  his  imagina- 
tion a  long  procession  of  human  Brer  Foxes 
"  polin'  'long,"  up  hill  and  down  hill,  waiting 
for  the  hind  wheels  to  overtake  the  front  ones. 
After  a  while  the  little  boy  asked  what  became 
of  Brother  Fox. 

"  Well,  honey,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  he 
des  foller  'long,  trottin'  en  gallopin',  waitin' 
f  er  de  wheels  ter  ketch  up  wid  one  anudder. 
Ef   he  ain't   in  Massasip  by   dis  time,  I  'm 


BROTHER  RABBITS  MONEY  MINT.         129 

mighty  much  mistaken.  I  boun'  yo'  Unc' 
Jeems  '11  see  'im  when  he  go  out  dar !  Brer 
Fox  had  ter  take  his  foot  in  his  han',  en  git 
dar  de  bes'  way  he  kin  ;  yo'  Unc'  Jeems  gwine 
by  conveyance." 


xvn. 


WHY   THE   MOON'S   FACE   IS   SMUTTY. 


"  Hit  's  money,  honey,  de  worl'  over/'  re* 
marked  Uncle  Remus,  after  a  somewhat  pro- 
longed silence.  "  Go  whar  you  will,  en  go 
when  you  may,  en  stay  ez  long  ez  mought  be, 
en  you  '11  fin'  folks  huntin'  atter  money  — 
mornin'  en  evenin',  day  en  night. 

"  Look  at  um  !  Why,  dar  's  de  Moon,"  — 
something  in  the  attitude  or  the  countenance 
of  the  child  caused  Uncle  Remus  to  stop  sud- 
denly and  laugh. 

"  The  Moon,  Uncle  Remus  ? "  exclaimed 
the  youngster.    "  What  about  the  Moon  ?  " 

"  Well,  you  know  how  folks  talk  'bout  de 
Moon.  You  '11  hear  um  say  she 's  on  her  fus' 
quarter,  en  den  on  'er  las'  quarter ;  en  dat  des 
'zackly  de  way  dey  talk  'bout  money.  I  hear 
tell  dat  one  time  dey  wuz  a  man  gwine  'long 
en  de  woods,  en  he  hear  a  mighty  jinglin'  en 
rattlin'.  He  look  'roun',  en  see  it  wuz  de  Moon 
er  changin'.     Seem  like  she  lacked  a  quarter, 


WHY  THE  MOON'S  FACE  IS  SMUTTY.      131 

en  de  man  pulled  out  his  money-purse  en  flung 
de  quarter  in,  en  den  she  change  all  right. 

"  But  dat  ain't  no  tale ;  hit  des  a  rig," 
Uncle  Remus  continued,  not  waiting  to  see  the 
effect  of  this  venerable  joke.  "  De  tale  dat  I 
been  hearin'  'bout  de  moon  ain't  got  no  money 
in  it,  en  dat  mighty  funny,  too,  kaze  it  look 
like  money  is  mix  up  wid  mos'  eve'ything. 

"  In  dem  days,  way  back  yander,  de  Moon 
use  ter  come  down  en  get  behime  a  big  poplar 
log,  when  she  wanter  make  a  change.  She 
ain't  want  nobody  to  see  'er.  She  'd  rise  later 
en  later  eve'y  night,  des  like  she  do  now,  en 
den  to'rds  de  las'  she  'd  drap  down  on  de  fur 
een  er  de  Ian',  over  dat  away,  en  slip  behime 
de  poplar  log  en  change  all  she  want  ter. 

"  But  one  time  dey  wuz  a  man  gwine  'long 
thoo  de  woods  totin'  a  bag  er  charcoal,  what 
he  been  burnin'.  He  been  watchin'  de  coal 
kil'  sence  midnight  de  night  befo',  en  he 
uz  so  tired  out  en  broke  down  dat  stidder 
singin'  er  whistlin',  like  folks  does  when  dey 
go  thoo  de  woods,  he  uz  des  gwine  'bout  his 
business  widout  making  any  fuss.  He  wuz 
axin  hisse'f  ef  dey  'd  be  any  hot  ashcake  wait- 
in'  fer  'im,  en  whedder  de  ole  'oman  'd  save 
*im  any  pot-liquor  f um  dinner. 


132    UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  He  wuz  gwine  'long  dis  away,  when  de 
fus'  news  lie  know,  he  come  right  'pon  de 
Moon  whiles  she  wuz  changin'.  Man,  suh ! 
Dey  wuz  de  bigges'  flutternient  den  en  dar  dat 
dey  'sever  been  befo'  er  since.  Folks  'way  off 
thought  dey  could  hear  thunder,  dough  dey 
wan't  nothin'  in  de  roun'  worl'  but  de  Moon 
tryin'  fer  ter  git  out  de  way  er  de  man. 

"  De  man,  he  drapt  de  bag  er  charcoal  en 
run  like  ole  Scratch  wuz  atter  'im.  He  des 
tored  thoo  de  woods  like  a  harrycane  wuz  blow- 
in'  'im  'long.  He  'uz  gwine  one  way  en  de 
Moon  anudder,  but  de  Moon  she  tripped  en  fell 
right  topper  de  bag  er  charcoal,  en  you  kin 
see  de  signs  un  it  down  ter  dis  day.  Look  at 
'er  when  you  will,  en  you  '11  see  dat  she  look 
like  she  been  hit  'cross  .de  face  wid  a  sut-bag. 
Don't  take  my  word  fer  it.  Des  look  fer  yo'- 
se'f  !  Dar  't  is !  Ever  sence  dat  day  de  Moon 
done  got  so  she  do  'er  changin'  up  in  de  ele- 
ments." 

After  awhile  the  little  boy  asked  what  be- 
came of  the  man  that  had  the  bag  of  char- 
coal. 

"  What  dat  got  ter  do  wid  de  tale  ?  "  said 
Uncle  Remus,  sharply.  "  Long  ez  de  Moon 
is  up  dar  all  safe  en  soun',  'ceppin'  de  smut, 


WHY  THE  MOON'S  FACE  IS  SMUTTY.      133 

it  don't  make  no  diffunce  'bout  no  man.  You 
run  'long  en  tell  yo'  Unc'  Jeems  dat  ef  he 
gwine  gi'  you  anything  he  better  let  you  have 
it  'f  o'  he  go  out  dar  ter  Massasip  —  kaze,  I 
tell  you  right  now,  Massasip  is  des  anudder 
name  fer  trouble.  I  done  seed  it  work  out 
dat  away." 


xvm. 

BROTHER   RABBIT    CONQUERS    BROTHER    LION. 

"  Uncle  Remus/'  remarked  the  little  boy, 
one  day,  "  papa  says  that  the  animals  have  n't 
got  sure  enough  sense." 

"  Did  Marse  John  tell  you  dat?"  asked  the 
old  man,  letting  his  shoe-hammer  drop  from 
his  hands,  as  though  astonishment  had  ren-, 
dered  him  helpless.  "  Did  Marse  John  set  up 
flat-footed  in  a  cheer  and  tell  you  dat  de 
creeturs  ain't  got  sho  'nuff  sense?  Ain't  he 
wink  his  eye  when  he  tell  you  dat?  Ain't 
you  see  his  chin  drap  ?  " 

The  little  boy  had  seen  none  of  these  mani- 
festations, and  he  said  so. 

"Well,"  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus,  with  a 
groan,  "I  dunner  how  come  Marse  John  fer  ter 
take  on  dat  away.  He  used  to  be  a  mighty 
joker  when  he  wuz  fust  married;  but  look 
like  he  too  ole  fer  dat  kinder  doin's  now. 
When  you  go  back  up  dar,  yon  tell  Marse 
John,  dat  time  he  been  wid  de  creeturs  long 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER  LION.    135 

ez  I  is,  he  won't  set  up  dar  wid  a  straight  face 
en  say  dat  dey  ain't  got  sho  'miff  sense.  Des 
ax  'im  how  dat  ole  blue  sow  up  dar  in  de  woods 
pastur'  know  when  ter  shake  de  plum  tree. 
Ax  'im  who  tol'  'er  how  ter  bump  'er  head 
'ginst  de  floor  er  de  crib  en  shatter  de  corn 
out.  En  den,  when  he  git  thoo  tellin'  you 
'bout  dat,  ax  'im  how  dat  brindle  cow  larn't 
how  ter  open  all  de  plantation  gates  wid  'er 
horn. 

"I  be  blest,"  continued  Uncle  Remus, 
laughing  a  little,  "  ef  dat  cow  ain't  a  sight. 
Ef  Marse  John  '11  des  let  'er  come  in  de  house, 
she  '11  go  up  sta'rs  en  onlock  his  trunk  wid  'er 
horn,  en  chaw  up  dat  ar  claw-hammer  coat 
what  he  got  married  in.  She  mos'  sholy  will. 
Co'se  de  creeturs  can't  talk  none,  so  folks  kin 
tell  what  dey  say ;  but  ef  you  gwine  ter  blame 
anybody  fer  dat,  blame  de  folks,  don't  blame 
de  creeturs. 

"  Take  um  up  one  side  en  down  de  yuther, 
en  all  'roun?  ez  fur  ez  dey  go,  en  dey  got  much 
sense  ez  folks.  Dey  ain't  got  law  sense,  en 
dey  ain't  got  buyin'  en  sellin'  sense,  but  what 
dey  want  wid  it  ?  What  dey  gwine  do  wid 
it  ef  dey  had  it  ?  Tell  me  dat !  De  ole  cow, 
she   want  ter  git  in  de  sallid  patch,  en  she 


136    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

know  how  ter  open  de  gate.  De  ole  sow  want 
ripe  plums,  en  she  shake  de  tree ;  she  want 
corn,  en  she  bump  'er  head  'ginst  de  planks 
en  shatter  it  out.  What  mo'  do  dey  want? 
Dey  done  got  der  eddycation. 

"  De  littler  de  creeturs  is,  de  mo'  sense  dey 
got,  kaze  dey  bleedz  ter  have  it.  You  hear 
folks  say  dat  Brer  Kabbit  is  full  er  tricks.  It 's 
des  de  name  dey  give  it.  What  folks  calls 
tricks  is  creetur  sense.  Ef  ole  Brer  Lion  had 
much  sense  ez  Brer  Rabbit,  what  de  name 
er  goodness  would  de  balance  er  de  creeturs 
do  ?  Dey  would  n't  be  none  un  um  lef '  by 
dis  time." 

"  The  Lion  could  n't  catch  Brother  Rabbit, 
could  he,  Uncle  Remus  ?  "  said  the  little  boy. 

"Now  you  talkin',  honey,"  exclaimed  the 
old  man,  enthusiastically.  "  'Long  side  er 
Brer  Rabbit  ole  Brer  Lion  ain't  knee  high  ter 
a  duck.  He  mighty  strong ;  he  mighty  ser- 
vigrous ;  but  when  it  come  ter  head-work  he 
ain't  nowhar. 

"  Dey  wuz  one  time  when  Brer  Lion  wuz 
sorter  playin'  overseer  wid  de  yuther  creeturs. 
It  seem  like  he  got  de  idee  dat  all  un  um  got 
ter  pay  'im  toll,  kaze  he  de  strongest  en  de 
mos'  servigrous.     He  claim  one  out'n  eve'y 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER  LION.    137 

fambly  :  one  sheep  f um  de  sheeps,  one  goat 
fum  de  goats,  en  one  fum  all  de  kinds. 
Bimeby,  atter  so  long  a  time,  he  sont  word  ter 
Brer  Rabbit  dat  his  turn  done  come,  en  Brer 
Rabbit  he  sont  back  word,  'All  a-settin'.' 
Co'se  dis  make  ole  Miss  Rabbit  en  all  de  chil- 
luns  feel  mighty  bad.  De  chilluns,  dey  sot 
'roun'  a-whimperin'  en  a-snufflin',  en  ole  Miss 
Rabbit,  she  went  'bout  cryin'  en  wipin'  'er 
eyes  on  'er  apern.  But  Brer  Rabbit,  he  sot 
up  en  smoke  his  seegyar,  en  tell  um  for  ter 
quit  der  'havishness  en  larn  how  ter  don't. 

"  He  'low,  '  Ole  'oman,  ef  I  ain't  back  by 
supper-time,  des  set  my  vittles  down  dar  on  de 
ha'th,  so  it  '11  keep  sorter  warm.' 

"  Ole  Miss  Rabbit  say,  dat  stidder  wantin' 
vittles,  he  '11  be  vittles  hisse'f,  en  den  she 
snuffle  wuss  en  wuss.  But  Brer  Rabbit  he 
des  hoot  at  'er,  en  den  he  tuck  down  his 
walkin'  cane  en  put  out  fer  ter  see  Brer  Lion. 
De  little  Rabs,  dey  holler  out,  i  Good-by, 
daddy  ! '  en  Brer  Rabbit,  he  holler  back,  i  So 
long ! '  Ole  Miss  Rabbit,  she  look  atter  'im, 
she  did,  en  den  she  flung  'er  apern  over  'er 
head,  en  des  boo-hoo. 

"  But  Brer  Rabbit,  he  march  down  de  road 
ez  gay  ez  ef  he  gwine  ter  a  frolic.     He  march 


138    UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

on,  he  did,  en  des  'fo'  he  git  ter  de  place  whar 
ole  Brer  Lion  stay  at,  he  hid  his  walkin'  cane 
in  de  fence  cornder,  en  rumpled  up  his  ha'r  en 
draw'd  hisse'f  up  twel  he  look  like  he  ain't 
bigger  'n  a  poun'  er  soap  atter  a  hard  day's 
washin'.  Den  he  went  whar  dey  wuz  a  big, 
deep  spring,  a  little  piece  off  f  urn  de  road,  en 
look  at  hisse'f  in  de  water.  He  sort  er  roach 
back  his  years,  en  make  hisse'f  look  umble- 
come-tumble,  en  den  he  draw'd  his  mouf  'roun' 
en  wunk  one  eye,  en  shuck  his  fist  at  his  shad- 
der  in  de  water. 

"He  got  back  in  de  big  road,  he  did,  en 
crope  'long  like  he  ailin',  limpin'  fus  on  one 
foot  en  den  on  tudder,  en  bimeby  he  come  ter 
de  place  whar  ole  Brer  Lion  stay  at.  Brer 
Rabbit  sorter  drag  hisse'f  'long,  en  make  a 
bow.  Brer  Lion  look  at  'im  sideways,  en  ax 
'im  whar  he  gwine.  Brer  Rabbit  say  he  come 
de  mo'  willin'  kaze  it 's  his  turn  ter  come,  en 
he  been  f  eelin'  mighty  po'ly  dis  long  time.  He 
talk  mighty  weak  en  trimbly. 

"  Brer  Lion  look  at  'im  right  close,  en  'low, 
'You  won't  make  a  moufful.  Time  I  eat 
you,  I  '11  des  be  gettin'  hongry  good.' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  c  Yasser,  I  know  I  ain't 
fat,  en  I  speck  I  got  lots  er  fleas  on  me,  but 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER  LION.    139 

I  'm  mighty  willin'.  I  got  a  bad  cough,  en 
I  'm  tired  er  fallin'  off.  I  'm  des  about  ez  fat 
ez  de  mule  de  man  had,  which  he  hatter  tie  a 
knot  in  his  tail  fer  ter  keep  'im  fum  slippin' 
thoo  de  collar.' 

"Brer  Lion  look  at  'im,  en  study.  Brer 
Rabbit  'uz  so  skeer'd  he  talk  weaker  en  weaker. 

"  He  say,  i  Whiles  I  comin'  'long  des  now, 
I  seed  a  creetur  dat  uz  mos'  big  en  fat  ez  what 
you  is,  en  I  'low  ter  myse'f  dat  I  wish  ter  good- 
ness I  uz  fat  ez  he  is ;  so  Brer  Lion  kin  make 
out  his  dinner/ 

"  Brer  Lion  'low,  '  Who  is  he  ? ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  '  I  ain't  ax  'im  'is  name. 
He  'fuse  ter  'spon'  ter  my  howdy,  en  he  look  so 
servigrous  dat  I  put  out  fum  dar.' 

"  Brer  Lion  say,  '  Come,  show  me  whar  he 
is/ 

"  Brer  Rabbit  say,  *  I  'd  do  it  in  a  minnit, 
Brer  Lion,  but  I  skeer'd  he  '11  hurt  you.' 

"Brer  Lion  sorter  bristle  up  at  dis.  He 
'low,  'Hurt  who?  Come  on,  en  go  wid  me 
whar  he  is,  en  I  '11  show  you  who  '11  git  hurted, 
en  dat  in  short  order ! ' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  shuck  his  head.  He  say, 
6  You  better  take  me,  Brer  Lion.  I  ain't 
much,  but  I  'm  sump'n,  en  dat  ar  creetur  what 


140    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

I  seed  will  sholy  hurt  you.  He  got  claws  en 
he  got  tushes,  kaze  I  done  seed  um.  Don't 
go  whar  he  is,  Brer  Lion,  ef  you  got  any 
friendly  feelin'  fer  yo'  fambly.  Dat  creetur 
will  sholy  cripple  you  ! ' 

"Dis  make  Brer  Lion  mighty  mad.  He 
'low,  '  Git  right  in  de  road  dar  en  show  me 
whar  he  is  ! ' 

"Brer  Rabbit  say,  'Well,  ef  I  bleedz  ter 
go,  Brer  Lion,  I  '11  go.  I  done  toT  you,  en 
dat 's  all  I  kin  do/ 

"Dey  went  on,  dey  did,  en  Brer  Rabbit 
tuck  Brer  Lion  ter  de  spring.  When  dey  got 
dar,  Brer  Rabbit  look  'roun'  en  say,  *  He  uz 
right  'roun'  here  somers,  en  he  ain't  so 
mighty  fur  off  now,  kaze  I  feel  it  in  my 
bones.' 

"  Den  he  crope  up,  Brer  Rabbit  did,  en  look 
in  de  spring.  Time  he  do  dis,  he  fetched  a 
squall  en  jump  back :  i  Ouch,  Brer  Lion !  he 
in  dar !     Less  run  !     He  '11  git  us,  sho ! ' 

"  Brer  Lion  walk  up  ter  de  spring  en  look 
in.  Sho  'nuff,  dar  wuz  a  big  creetur  lookin' 
back  at  'im.  Brer  Lion  holler  at  'im.  De 
creetur  in  de  spring  ain't  say  nothin'.  Brer 
Lion  shuck  his  head;  de  creetur  shuck  his. 
Brer  Lion  showed  his  tushes ;  de  creetur  grin 


WM-f'X  ''/^frZ,  f,^>\%* 


BROTHER  RABBIT  AND  BROTHER  LION.    141 

at  'im.  Dey  kep'  on  dis  away,  twel  bimeby 
Brer  Lion  git  so  mad  dat  he  jump  in  de  spring 
head  foremos'.  When  he  in  dar  he  can't  git 
out  no  mo',  en  so  dar  he  is,  strangled  wid  de 
water  en  drownded  fer  de  want  er  bof e  sense 
en  breff. 

"  Brer  Rabbit,  he  caper  'roun'  dar  some  lit- 
tle time,  en  den  he  put  out  fer  home,  en  when 
he  git  dar,  he  tuck  his  chilluns  on  his  knee  en 
tole  um  a  mighty  tale  'bout  how  he  make  way 
wid  ole  Brer  Lion;  en  all  de  creeturs  hear 
'bout  it,  en  dey  go  'roun'  en  say  dat  Brer 
Eabbit  sholy  is  got  deze  'ere  things  up  here." 

Uncle  Remus  tapped  his  forehead  signifi- 
cantly, and  the  little  boy  laughed. 


XIX. 

),    HOUSE  ! " 


"I  don't  think  Brother  Lion  had  much 
sense,"  remarked  the  little  boy  after  awhile. 

"  Yit  he  had  some/'  responded  Uncle  Re- 
mus.  "  He  bleedz  ter  had  some,  but  he  ain't 
got  much  ez  Brer  Rabbit.  Dem  what  got 
strenk  ain't  got  so  mighty  much  sense.  You 
take  niggers  —  dey  er  lots  stronger  dan  what 
white  folks  is.  I  ain't  so  strong  myse'f,"  re- 
marked the  old  man,  with  a  sly  touch  of  van- 
ity that  was  lost  on  the  little  boy,  "  but  de 
common  run  er  niggers  is  lots  stronger  dan 
white  folks.  Yit  I  done  tuck  notice  in  my  time 
dat  what  white  folks  calls  sense  don't  turn  out 
ter  be  sense  eve'y  day  en  Sunday  too.  I  ain't 
never  see  de  patter-roller  what  kin  keep  up 
wid  me.  He  may  go  hoss-back,  he  may  go 
foot-back,  it  don't  make  no  diffunce  ter  me. 
Dt3y  never  is  kotch  me  yit,  en  when  dey  does, 
I  '11  let  you  know. 

*  Dat  de  way  wid  Brer  Rabbit,"  Uncle  Re« 


"HEYO,  HOUSE!"  143 

mus  went  on,  after  a  pause.  "  De  few  times 
what  he  been  outdone  he  mighty  willin'  fer 
ter  let  um  talk  'bout  it,  ef  it  '11  do  um  any 
good.  Dem  what  outdo  'im  got  de  right  ter 
brag,  en  he  ain't  make  no  deniance  un  it. 

"Atter  he  done  make  way  wid  ole  Brer 
Lion,  all  de  yuther  creeturs  say  he  sholy  is  a 
mighty  man,  en  dey  treat  'im  good.  Dis  make 
'im  feel  so  proud  dat  he  bleedz  ter  show  it, 
en  so  he  strut  'roun'  like  a  boy  when  he  git 
his  fust  pa'r  er  boots. 

"  'Bout  dat  time,  Brer  Wolf  tuck  a  notion 
dat  ef  Brer  Rabbit  kin  outdo  ole  Brer  Lion, 
he  can't  outdo  him.  So  he  pick  his  chance 
one  day  whiles  ole  Miss  Rabbit  en  de  little 
Rabs  is  out  pickin'  sallid  fer  dinner.  He  went 
in  de  house,  he  did,  en  wait  fer  Brer  Rabbit 
ter  come  home.  Brer  Rabbit  had  his  hours, 
en  dis  wuz  one  un  um,  en 't  wan't  long  'f o'  here 
he  come.  He  got  a  mighty  quick  eye,  mon, 
en  he  tuck  notice  dat  ev'ything  mighty  still. 
When  he  got  little  nigher,  he  tuck  notice  dat 
de  front  door  wuz  on  de  crack,  en  dis  make 
'im  feel  funny,  kaze  he  know  dat  when  his  ole 
'oman  en  de  chillun  out,  dey  allers  pulls  de 
door  shet  en  ketch  de  latch.  So  he  went  up 
a  little  nigher,  en  he  step  thin  ez  a  batter- 


144    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

cake.  He  peep  here,  en  he  peep  dar,  yit  he 
ain't  see  nothin'.  He  lissen  in  de  chimbley 
cornder,  en  he  lissen  und'  de  winder,  yit  he 
ain't  hear  nothin'. 

"  Den  he  sorter  wipe  his  mustach  en  study. 
He  'low  ter  hisse'f,  6  De  pot  rack  know  what 
gwine  on  up  de  chimbley,  de  rafters  know 
who 's  in  de  loft,  de  bed  -  cord  know  who 
und'  de  bed.  I  ain't  no  pot-rack,  I  ain't  no 
rafter,  en  I  ain't  no  bed-cord,  but,  please  gra- 
cious !  I  'm  gwine  ter  fin'  who 's  in  dat  house, 
en  I  ain't  gwine  in  dar  nudder.  Dey  mo' 
ways  ter  fin'  out  who  fell  in  de  mill-pond  wid- 
out  fallin'  in  yo'se'f .' 

"  Some  folks,"  Uncle  Remus  went  on, 
"would  'a'  rushed  in  dar,  en  ef  dey  had,  dey 
would  n't  'a'  rushed  out  no  mo',  kaze  dey 
wouldn't  'a'  been  nothin'  't  all  lef  un  um  but 
a  little  scrap  er  hide  en  a  han'f ul  er  ha'r. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  got  better  sense  dan  dat. 
All  he  ax  anybody  is  ter  des  gi'  'im  han'-room- 
ance,  en  dem  what  kin  ketch  'im  is  mo'  dan 
welly-come  ter  take  'im.  Dat  'zackly  de  kinder 
man  what  Brer  Rabbit  is.  He  went  off  a  lit- 
tle ways  fum  de  house  en  clum  a  'simmon 
stump  en  got  "ip  dar  en  'gun  ter  holler. 

"  He  'low,  e  Heyo,  house  ! ' 


"HEYO,  HOUSE!"  145 

u  De  house  ain't  make  no  answer,  en  Brer 
Wolf,  in  dar  behhne  de  door,  open  his  eyes 
■wide.  He  ain't  know  what  ter  make  er  dat 
kinder  doin's. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  holler,  '  Heyo,  house  !  Why 
n't  you  heyo  ? ' 

"  House  ain't  make  no  answer,  en  Brer  Wolf 
in  dar  behime  de  door  sorter  move  roun'  like 
he  gittin'  restless  in  de  min'. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  out  dar  on  de  'simmon  stump 
holler  mo'  louder  dan  befo',  (  Heyo,  house  ! 
Heyo  ! ' 

"  House  stan'  still,  en  Brer  Wolf  in  dar  be- 
hime de  door  'gun  ter  feel  col'  chills  streakin' 
up  and  down  his  back.  In  all  his  born  days 
he  ain't  never  hear  no  gwines  on  like  dat.  He 
peep  thoo  de  crack  er  de  door,  but  he  can't  see 
nothin'. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  holler  louder,  '  Heyo,  house ! 
Ain't  you  gwine  ter  heyo  ?  Is  you  done  los' 
what  little  manners  you  had  ?  ' 

"  Brer  Wolf  move  'bout  wuss'n  befo'.  He 
feel  des  like  some  un  done  hit  'im  on  de  fun- 
ny-bone. 

"  Brer  Rabbit  holler  hard  ez  he  kin,  but 
still  he  ain't  git  no  answer,  en  den  he  'low, 
6  Sholy  sump^n  nudder  is  de  matter  wid  dat 


146    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

house,  kaze  all  de  times  befo'  dis,  it  been  hoi- 
ler'n  back  at  me,  Heyo,  yo'se'f ! ' 

"  Den  Brer  Rabbit  wait  little  bit,  en  bimeby 
he  holler  one  mo'  time,  '  Heyo,  house  ! ' 

"  Ole  Brer  Wolf  try  ter  talk  like  he  speck 
a  house  'ud  talk,  en  he  holler  back,  '  Heyo, 
yo'se'f!' 

"  Brer  Rabbit  wunk  at  hisse'f .  He  low, 
<  Heyo,  house  !  why  n't  you  talk  hoarse  like 
you  got  a  bad  col'  ? ' 

"  Den  Brer  Wolf  holler  back,  hoarse  ez  he 
kin, c  Heyo,  yo'se'f  ! ' 

"  Dis  make  Brer  Rabbit  laugh  twel  a  little 
mo'  en  he  'd  a  drapt  off'n  dat  ar  'simmon  stump 
en  hurt  hisse'f. 

"He  'low,  <Eh-eh,  Brer  Wolf!  dat  ain't 
nigh  gwine  ter  do.  You  'U  hatter  stan'  out  in 
de  rain  a  mighty  long  time  'f o'  you  kin  talk 
hoarse  ez  dat  house  ! ' 

"  I  let  you  know,"  continued  Uncle  Remus, 
laying  his  hand  gently  on  the  little  boy's  shoul- 
der, "  I  let  you  know,  Brer  Wolf  come  a-slink- 
in'  out,  en  made  a  break  f  er  home.  Atter  dat, 
Brer  Rabbit  live  a  long  time  wid'out  any  er 
de  yuther  creeturs  a-pesterin  un  'im ! " 


XX. 

ACCORDING  TO  HOW  THE  DROP  PALLS, 

"  Is  I  gwine  tell  you  a  tale  right  now  ? '" 
said  Uncle  Remus,  in  response  to  a  question 
by  the  little  boy.  "  Well,  I  ain't  right  cer- 
tain en  sho'  'bout  dat.  It 's  'cordin  ter  how 
de  drap  falls." 

"  Pshaw !  "  exclaimed  the  youngster,  "  I  've 
heard  you  say  that  before.  I  don't  know  what 
you  mean  when  you  say  it 's  according  to  how 
the  drop  falls." 

"  Ah-yi !  "  retorted  Uncle  Remus  trium- 
phantly, "  Den  I  'm  a  punkin  ahead  er  yo' 
'simmon,  is  I  ?  " 

"  It 's  according  to  how  the  drop  falls,"  re- 
joined the  little  boy,  laughing. 

"  De  way  dat  sayin'  come  'bout,"  said  Un- 
cle Remus,  "  may  be  funny,  but  't  ain't  no 
tale.  It  des  happen  so.  One  time  dey  wuz  a 
'oman  call  on  a  neighbor  'oman  des '  f  o'  din- 
ner-time. I  dunner  whedder  de  neighbor 
'oman  like  dis  mighty  well,  but  she  'uz  mon 
st'us  perlite  all  de  same. 


'  148    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  She  'low,  c  Come  right  in,  en  take  off 
yo'  things  en  make  yo'se'f  at  home.  You  '11 
hatter  skuzen  my  han's,  kaze  I  'm  makin'  up 
dough.  Fling  ye'  bonnet  on  de  bed  dar,  en 
take  a  seat  en  be  seated.' 

"Well,  de  tudder'  'oman,  she  sot  dar  en 
talk,  en  watch  de  neighbor  'oman  mix  dough 
f  er  de  bread,  en  dey  run'd  on  des  like  wimmin 
folks  does.  It  seem  like  de  neighbor  'oman 
got  a  bad  col',  en  her  eyes  run  water  twel  some 
un  it  crope  down  ter  de  een  er  her  nose  en 
hang  dar.  De  tudder  'oman,  she  watch  it, 
whiles  dey  er  talkin'.  De  neighbor  'oman  she 
work  up  de  dough,  en  work  it  up,  en  talk. 
Sometimes  she  'd  hoi'  her  head  f  um  over  de 
tray  en  talk,  en  den  ag'in  she  'd  hoi'  it  right 
spang  over  de  dough,  en  shake  'er  head  en  talk. 

"  Bimeby  she  'low,  '  Won't  you  stay  ter 
dinner  ?  I  '11  have  dis  bread  done  in  two 
shakes  uv  a  sheep's  tail.' 

"De  tudder  'oman  say,  CI  can't  tell  you, 
ma'am ;  it 's  'cordin'  ter  how  de  drap  falls.' 

"  De  tudder  'oman  say,  '  Dey  ain't  a  cloud 
in  de  sky,  so  't  ain't  gwine  ter  rain.  You  des 
ez  well  stay.' 

C/  De  tudder  'oman  'low,  '  I  done  tole  you 
de  ti-ufe ;  hit  's  'cordin'  ter  how  de  drap  falls.' 


ACCORDING  TO  HOW  THE  DROP  FALLS.    149 

"  So,  atter  dat,  when  folks  wan't  right  cer- 
tain en  sho'  'bout  what  dey  gwine  do,  dey  'd 
up  en  say  't  wuz  'cordin'  ter  how  de  drap  fall." 

"  Well,  how  did  it  fall,  Uncle  Remus  — 
in  the  bread-tray,  or  on  the  table,  or  on  the 
floor  ?  "  the  little  boy  inquired. 

"  Lawsy,  honey  !  "  responded  the  old  man, 
"  ef  I  'uz  er  tell  you,  I  'd  hatter  dream  it,  en 
dreamin'  ain't  gwine  do  you  er  me  any  mo' 
good  dan  it  done  de  nigger  man  what  had  de 
possum." 

"  I  never  heard  of  that,"  said  the  little  boy. 

"  Oh,  yes  you  is !  "  Uncle  Remus  asserted 
with  some  emphasis.  "  You  been  hearin' 
'bout  it  off'n  on  sence  you  uz  knee-high  ter  a 
duck,  en  you  ain't  much  mo'n  dat  right  now. 
No,  suh !  You  des  got  de  idee  in  yo'  min' 
dat  when  I  set  down  fer  ter  tell  you  sump'n 
hit's  bleedz  ter  be  a  tale,  en  when  yuther 
folks  tells  it  't  ain't  nothin'  but  talk.  I  ain't 
got  no  secret  'bout  dish  yer  nigger  man  what 
had  de  possum,  but  I  tell  you  right  now,  't  ain't 
no  tale.  Too  many  folks  done  been  fool  wid 
it. 

"  Well,  den,  one  time  dey  wuz  a  nigger 
man,  en  dish  yer  nigger  man  had  a  big  fat 
possum  en  a  half  er  peck  er  sweet  'taters. 


150    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

He  tuck  de  possum  en  de  taters  home,  en  he 
lay  urn  down,  —  de  possum  on  one  side  de 
fireplace  en  de  taters  on  tudder  side.  Den  he 
get  some  wood  and  chips  en  make  'im  a  fier, 
en  den  he  fotch  out  de  skillet.  He  put  de 
possum  in  dar,  he  did,  en  he  put  de  taters  in 
de  ashes  close  by  fer  ter  keep  'im  comp'ny. 
Den  he  raked  out  some  hot  embers  en  sot  de 
skillet  on  um,  en  he  put  on  de  skillet  led,  en 
piled  some  embers  'pon  topper  dat. 

"  He  sot  dar,  he  did,  en  wait  fer  de  possum 
fer  ter  git  done,  en  whiles  he  wuz  a-waitin'  he 
struck  up  a  song.  Maybe  you  done  hear  it 
'fo'  now,  but  dat  ain't  make  no  diffunce  ter 
me,  kaze  when  I  git  started  dis  away,  I  'm  like 
de  bull  yearlin'  gwine  down  de  lane ;  dem 
what  gits  in  de  way  gwine  ter  git  run'd  over 
—  dey  mos'  sholy  is  !  " 

Uncle  Remus  leaned  back  in  his  chair, 
closed  his  eyes,  and  began  to  pat  his  foot. 
Then,  after  a  little  pause,  he  sang  this  frag- 
ment of  a  song :  — 

"  Virginny  cut,  chaw  terbacker, 
Nigger  dance  ter  merlatter ; 
Hoe  de  corn,  dig  er  tater, 
Plant  terbacker,  't  is  no  matter. 

"  Mix  de  meal,  fry  de  batter, 
Nigger  dance  ter  merlatter ; 


ACCORDING  TO  HOW  THE  DROP  FALLS.    151 

Warm  de  cake  in  er  platter, 
Fry  um  in  de  cooney  fat. 

"  Grab  er  tater  out  de  ash, 
Nigger  dance  ter  merlatter ; 
Possum  meat  dar  in  der  platter, 
Shoo !  he  make  de  nigger  fatter." 

Uncle  Remus's  voice  was  full  of  melody, 
and  he  sang  the  song  to  a  rollicking  tune. 
The  little  boy  was  so  much  pleased  that  he 
asked  the  old  man  to  sing  it  again. 

"  Bless  yo'  soul,  honey.  Ef  I  git  in  a  fa'r 
way  er  singin',  de  niggers  '11  all  quit  der 
work  en  crowd  'roun'  here  en  jine  in  wid  me, 
en  we  '11  have  a  reg'lar  ole-timey  camp-meetin' 
gwine  on  here  'fo'  you  know  it.  I  ain't  got 
no  time  fer  dat. 

"Now,  den,  dish  yer  nigger  man,  what  I 
been  tellin'  you  'bout,  he  got  his  taters  in  de 
ashes  en  his  possum  in  de  skillet,  en  he  sot 
dar  en  sing  de  song,  en  watch  um  all  cook. 
Atter  so  long  a  time  dey  got  done,  en  he  pull 
de  taters  out'n  de  embers,  en  push  de  skillet 
'way  fum  de  fier.  He  'low  ter  hisse'f,  he 
did,  dat  col'  possum  is  better' n  hot  possum, 
dough  bofe  un  um  is  good  nuff  fer  anybody. 
So  he  say  he  '11  des  let  it  set  dar  en  cool,  en 


152    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

soak  in  de  gravy.  Den  he  say  he  b'lieve 
he  '11  do  some  noddin',  kaze  den  he  '11  dream 
he  eatin'  de  possum,  en  den  he  '11  wake  up  en 
eat  'im  sho  nuff,  en  have  de  'joyment  er  eatin 
'im  two  times. 

"  Well,  suh,  dat  des  de  way  he  done.  He 
sot  back  in  his  cheer,  de  nigger  man  did,  en 
he  nodded  en  nodded,  en  he  work  his  mouf 
des  like  he  eatin'  possum,  en  he  grunt  in  his 
sleep  like  he  feelin'  good.  But  whiles  he  set- 
tin'  dar  sleepin',  a  nudder  nigger  man  smell  de 
possum,  en  he  crope  up  ter  de  door  en  peep  in. 
He  seed  how  de  Ian'  lay,  en  he  slipped  off  his 
shoes  en  stole  in.  He  lif'  up  de  led  er  de 
skillet,  en  dar  wuz  de  possum.  He  look  on  de 
side  er  de  h'ath,  en  dar  wuz  de  taters.  Now, 
den,  when  dat  de  case,  what  gwine  ter  hap- 
pen? Possum,  en  tater,  en  hongry  nigger! 
Well,  suh,  de  fust  news  you  know,  de  possum 
wuz  all  bones,  de  taters  wuz  all  peelin's,  en  de 
nigger  wuz  mo'  dan  a  nigger.  He  fix  de 
bones  in  one  little  pile,  en  he  fix  de  peelin's  in 
anudder  little  pile,  en  den  he  tuck  some  er  de 
possum  gravy  en  rub  it  on  de  tudder  nigger's 
mouf  en  han's,  en  den  he  went  on  'bout  his 
business. 

"  'T  wan't  so  mighty  long  atter  dat  'f o'  de 


ACCORDING  TO  HOW  THE  DROP  FALLS.    153 

noddin'  nigger  wake  up.  He  open  his  eyes, 
he  did,  en  stretch  hisse'f,  en  look  at  de  skillet 
en  laugh. 

"He  'low,  'You  er  dar,  is  you?  Well, 
I  '11  tell  you  howdy  now,  en  terreckly  I  '11  tell 
you  good-by ! ' 

"He  tuck  de  led  off'n  de  skillet,  en  dey 
ain't  no  possum  dar.  He  look  'roun'  fer  de 
taters,  en  dey  ain't  no  taters  dar.  Dey  ain't 
nothin'  dar  but  a  pile  er  bones  en  a  pile  er 
tater-peelin's.  De  nigger  sot  down  in  his 
cheer  en  went  ter  studyin'.  He  look  at  his 
han's,  en  he  see  possum  grease  on  um.  He 
lick  out  his  tongue,  en  he  tas'e  possum  gravy 
on  his  mouf.  He  shuck  his  head  en  study. 
He  look  at  his  han's :  *  Possum  been  dar  ! '  He 
lick  his  mouf :  '  Possum  been  dar,  too ! '  He 
rub  his  stomach :  '  But  I  be  bless  ef  any  pos- 
sum been  here  !  ■  " 


XXI. 

A   FOOL   FOR   LUCK. 

Uncle  Remus  did  not  pause  to  see  whether 
the  little  boy  liked  the  possum  story  or  not. 
Perhaps  he  felt  that  it  deserved  no  attention, 
being  only  a  plantation  joke  —  a  remnant  of 
a  tale  which  had  not  sufficient  interest  to  pre- 
serve it. 

"  Dat  nigger  man,"  he  remarked,  "  wuz  big 
'nuff  fool  f er  ter  have  mo'  luck  dan  dat.  You 
heern  what  de  ole  sayin'  sez,  <  fool  f er  luck  en 
po'  man  fer  chillun.'  Well,  one  time  dey  wuz 
a  man  what  do  so  funny  dat  folks  call  'im  a 
fool.  He  uz  a  hard  workin'  man,  too,  en"  he 
raise  good  craps,  but  he  do  like  he  cripple 
und'  de  hat.  He  had  a  crib  full  er  co'n,  en 
bimeby  he  'gun  ter  miss  it.  He  watch  de 
crib  at  night  en  in  de  daytime,  but  he  ain't 
see  nobody  takin'  none,  en  de  corn  keep  on 
gettin'  lower  en  lower.  De  man  live  on  de 
river,  en  on  de  yuther  side  de  river  dey  wuz  a 
big  woods.     Bimeby  somebody  tell  de  man  dat 


A  FOOL  FOB  LUCK.  155 

de  squir'ls  wuz  totin'  off  his  corn.  De  man 
laugh  en  say  dat  ef  squir'ls  kin  tote  off  his 
corn,  sev'm  bushels  at  a  time,  dey  er  mo'  dan 
welcome.     But  he  watch  all  de  same. 

"  He  got  up  'f  o'  day,  en  went  en  sot  by  de 
crib,  en  't  wan't  long  'f  o'  he  seed  a  sight  dat 
make  'im  rub  his  eyes.  He  hear  a  racket  on 
de  fence  en  a  clatter  in  de  bushes,  en  de 
squir'ls  'gun  ter  swarm  'roun'  de  crib,  en  all 
un  um  come  f  um  to'rds  de  river.  De  man  sot 
en  watch  um.  Dey  clum  up  in  de  crib,  dey 
did,  en  eve'y  blessed  one  un  um  tuck  a  year  er 
corn  in  dey  mouf  en  start  back  'cross  de  river. 
De  man  foller  'long  atter  um. 

"  When  dey  git  ter  de  river,  dey  put  de  corn 
down,  en  hunt  'roun'  twel  dey  git  a  piece  er 
bark.  Dey  put  de  bark  in  de  water*  en  lay  de 
corn  in  it,  den  dey  shove  out  fum  sho,  en  h'ist 
der  tails  fer  sails  en  go  on  'cross.  Eve'y  one 
had  a  piece  er  bark,  en  dey  ferry  dat  corn 
'cross  like  dey  done  been  use  ter  dat  kinder 
business. 

"  De  man,  he  sot  dar  like  he  dazed.  He  go 
back  de  nex'  mornin'  en  watch,  en  he  see  da 
same  kind  er  doin's.  Eve'y  squir'l  tuck  a  year 
er  corn,  en  eve'y  squir'l  got  'im  a  piece  er 
bark,  en  h'ist  his  tail  'pon  his  back  en  sail 


156    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

'cross  de  river.  De  man  ain't  say  a  word.  He 
ain't  so  much  ez  shoo  at  urn.  He  des  set  dar 
en  watch  urn  en  laugh.  Mo'  dan  dat,  he  went 
en  tol'  yuther  folks  'bout  it  en  laugh  some 
mo'.  Dey  ax  'im  why  n't  he  make  de  squir'ls 
drap  de  corn,  en  he  des  wunk  at  um  en  grin» 
Den  dey  say  he  bleedz  ter  be  a  fool,  en  he 
wunk  en  laugh  som  mo'. 

"  Bimeby,  when  de  corn  'gun  ter  git  low  in 
de  crib,  de  man  tuck  his  gun  en  his  ax,  en 
went  'cross  de  river  fer  ter  look  atter  it.  He 
wuz  gwine  'long,  huntin'  fer  de  corn,  when  up 
jump  a  rabbit.  He  raise  his  gun  en  shot,  en 
des  ez  he  shot  de  rabbit  run  inter  a  covey  er 
pa'tridges.  At  de  shot  a  turkey  gobbler 
flopped  up  en  flew'd  in  a  big  poplar,  en  de 
man  lammed  loose  wid  de  yuther  barrel,  en  de 
gobbler  drapt  over  en  lodged  up  dar.  Den  he 
look  over  de  groun'  en  fin'  one  dead  rabbit,  en 
lev'm  dead  pa'tridges.  One  pa'tridge  had  'er 
wing  broke,  en  she  scrambled  off  in  de 
bushes.  De  man  foller'd  on  atter,  en  ter- 
reckly  he  come  ter  whar  dey  wuz  a  turkey  nes' 
wid  a  hatful  er  turkey  eggs. 

"Den  he  clum  up  de  tree  fer  ter  git  de 
turkey.  When  he  got  up  dar,  he  see  dat  de 
turkey  done  drap  in  a  hole  like,  en  he  pull  'er 


A  FOOL  FOB  LUCE.  157 

out,  en  down  in  dar  wuz  all  his  corn.  He 
clum  down,  he  did,  en  got  de  axe  an  'gun  ter 
cut  de  tree  down.  He  ain't  mo'n  chopped 
thoo  de  bark  'fo'  he  seed  sump'n  nudder  run- 
nin'  out,  en  he  look  at  it  close,  en  it  uz  de  pyo 
honey. 

"He  'low,  'Hi!  I'm  gittin'  de  rent  fer 
my  corn ! ' 

"  Den  he  chopped  him  out  a  stob  en  plugged 
up  de  hole,  en  got  his  game  en  his  turkey 
eggs,  en  put  out  fer  home.  Whiles  he  gwine 
back  anudder  rabbit  jump  up.  De  man  ain't 
got  no  load  in  his  gun,  so  he  des  flung  de 
gun  at  'im.  De  rabbit  went  on,  but  when  de 
man  start  ter  pick  up  de  gun,  he  feel  de  groun' 
givin'  way  'neat'  his  foots,  en  'f o'  he  kin  ketch 
hisse'f  he  done  drapt  down  in  a  hole." 

"  Was  it  a  big,  deep  hole  ?  "  the  little  boy 
inquired,  with  some  show  of  eagerness. 

"  Well,  suh,  't  wuz  over  his  head,"  re- 
sponded Uncle  Remus,  vaguely.  "  It  seem 
like  some  un  had  made  de  hole  en  kivered  it 
wid'  a  plank,  en  den  put  dirt  on  de  plank.  It 
been  done  so  long  dat  de  man  come  'long  des 
in  time  fer  ter  fall  thoo.  When  he  'gun  ter 
fall,  he  make  up  his  min'  dat  't  wuz  all-night- 
Isom  dar  wid   him.     But  he  struck  bottom 


158    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

quicker'n  he  speckted  he  would,  en  when  he  git 
over  his  skeer  he  'gun  ter  feel  'roun'  fer  ter 
see  if  it  's  him  er  some  yuther  man  what  drapt 
in  dar.  Whiles  he  uz  feelin'  'roun'  fer  ter  see 
see  who  he  wuz,  en  whar  he  wuz,  en  what  he 
doin'  dar,  he  put  his  han'  on  sump'n  hard  en 
col'. 

"  Yasser !  right  den  en  dar  he  put  his  han' 
on  sump'n  hard  en  col'  —  en  what  you  reckon 
it  was  ?  Nothin'  in  de  roun'  worF  but  a  keg 
er  money  !  He  scrambled  out  er  dar,  atter  he 
lif '  de  keg  out,  en  den  he  roll  it  down  to  his 
canoe,  en  tuck  it  home.  He  count  it  up,  de 
man  did,  en  he  fin'  he  got  forty-lev'm  hundr'd 
dollars  in  hard  speeshy.  Wen  he  git  rested, 
he  tuck  his  hoss  en  waggin  en  a  empty  bar'l, 
en  went  'roun'  by  de  bridge,  en  back  ter  de 
place  whar  he  fin'  de  honey.  He  pull  de  plug 
out'n  de  tree  en  let  de  honey  run  in  de  bar'l 
twel  it 's  full,  en  den  he  tuck  it  home  en  fetch 
back  two  mo'  bar'ls,  en  got  dem  full.  Hit  went 
on  dis  away  twel  he  got  I  dunner  how  many 
bar'ls  er  honey.  En  den,  when  he  cut  down 
de  tree  en  haul  de  corn  home,  he  fin'  he  got 
mo'  dan  he  had  at  fust,  kaze  de  squir'ls  been 
stealin'  somebody  else  corn  'long  wid  his'n ! 

"  So  den,  dar  he  wuz,  wid  ez  much  money 


A  FOOL  FOR  LUCK.  159 

ez  he  want,  en  mo'  honey  dan  a  drove  er  mules 
kin  pull,  en  mo'  corn  dan  what  he  had  befo', 
en  all  de  game  he  want,  en  all  bekaze  he  de 
biggest  fool  in  sev'm  Nunited  States." 

Seeing  that  the  little  boy  was  disposed  to 
regard  his  story  somewhat  dubiously,  Uncle 
Remus  made  this  concluding  remark  :  — 

"  Tooby  sho,  dis  ain't  no  creetur  tale,  but  ef 
't  ain't  so,  how  come  folks  talkin'  'bout  it  yit  ? 
I  wish  you  be  so  good  ez  ter  tell  me  dat." 

But  the  little  boy  was  not  prepared  to  argue 
the  matter. 


XXII. 

THE    MAN   AND    HIS    BOOTS. 

u  You  done  hear  me  say  dat  de  creeturs  is 
got  mos'  ez  much  sense  ez  folks,  ain't  you, 
honey  ? "  inquired  Uncle  Remus,  one  day, 
when  he  and  the  little  boy  were  alone  together. 
The  youngster  nodded  assent.  "  Well,  den," 
said  the  old  man  solemnly,  "  I  'm  bleedz  ter 
tell  you  dat  sense  don't  stan'  fer  goodness. 
De  creeturs  dunno  nothin'  'tall  'bout  dat  dat 's 
good  en  dat  dat  ain't  good.  Dey  dunno 
right  fum  wrong.  Dey  see  what  dey  want, 
en  dey  git  it  ef  dey  kin,  by  hook  er  by  crook. 
Dey  don't  ax  who  it  b'longs  ter,  ner  whar- 
bouts  it  come  fum.  Dey  dunno  de  diffunce 
'twix  what 's  dern  en  what  ain't  dern. 

"Miss  Sally  say  no  longer'n  yistiddy,  dat 
I  'd  keep  on  tellin'  you  deze  creetur  tales  twel 
bimeby  you  '11  git  mix  up  in  de  min'  en  f ergit 
all  'bout  yo'  Sunday-school  lesson ;  but  I  laid 
down  dis  pint  ter  Miss  Sally,  dat  ef  a  chap 
'bout  yo'  age  en  size  dunno  de  diffunce  'twix 


THE  MAN  AND  HIS  BOOTS.  161 

creetur  doin's  en  folks'  doins',  he  better  be 
turned  out  ter  graze.  I  ain't  tellin'  you  deze 
tales  on  account  er  what  de  creeturs  does,  I  'm 
a  tellin'  um  on  account  er  de  way  de  creeturs 
does.  How  de  name  er  goodness  kin  folks  go 
on  en  steal  en  tell  fibs,  like  de  creeturs  done, 
en  not  git  hurted?  Dey  des  can't  do  it. 
Dead  dog  never  dies,  en  cheatin'  never  th'ives 

—  not  when  folks  git  at  it. 

"  One  time,"  Uncle  Remus  continued,  after 
delivering  this  little  sermon,  "  dey  wuz  a  man 
what  hear  talk  er  some  er  Brer  Rabbit's  doin's 

—  how  he  lay  down  in  de  road  whiles  a  man 
wuz  gwine  'long  wid  some  fishes  in  a  waggin, 
en  how  he  run  'roun'  en  lay  down  ag'in ;  en 
keep  on  doin'  dat  twel  bimeby  de  man  went 
back  atter  de  fust  rabbit  he  seed,  en  den  Brer 
Rabbit  had  a  chance  f er  ter  git  de  fishes  —  I 
done  mos'  fergit  dat  ar  tale  off'n  my  min\ 
But  howsomever  hit  wuz,  de  man  done  hear 
tell  'bout  it,  en  he  'low  ter  hisse'f  dat  he  des 
ez  smart  ez  what  Brer  Rabbit  is. 

"  So,  one  day,  he  got  'im  a  bran  new  pa'r 
er  boots  wid  red  tops  on  um,  en  whiles  he  set- 
tin'  side  er  de  road  looking  at  um,  he  hear 
somebody  comin'  'long  in  a  waggin.  He 
know'd  who  de  somebody  wuz,  kaze  he  seed 
um  on  de  rise  er  de  hill. 


162    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  De  man  in  de  waggin  had  some  calico  fer 
ter  make  his  wife  a  dress,  en  some  blue  chany 
ware  fer  ter  put  in  de  cubberd.  De  man  what 
had  de  boots,  he  tuck'n  flung  one  un  um  in  de 
road,  en  hid  hisse'f  in  de  bushes  fer  ter  see 
what  de  tudder  man  gwine  do. 

"  Well,  suh,  de  man  in  de  waggin,  he  come 
'long,  en  he  see  de  boot  in  de  road.  He  hol- 
ler at  his  hoss  fer  ter  'w'o  dar  ! '  en  he  look  at 
de  boot  right  hard,  like  he  studyin'. 

"  He  'low, '  Ef  dey  wuz  two  un  you,  I  'd  take 
you,  but  one  boot  ain't  gwine  do  nobody  no 
good,  'ceppin  hit 's  a  wooden-legged  man.' 

"So  he  driv  on,  en  de  man  what  lay  de 
boot  dar,  he  put  out  en  went  on  ahead  en 
flung  de  yuther  boot  in  de  road.  De  man  in 
de  waggin,  he  come  'long,  he  did,  en  he  see 
de  yuther  boot. 

"  He  'low,  c  Heyo !  dish  yer  boot  makes 
tudder  boot  good.  Wo,  dar,  hoss !  I  '11  go 
back  en  git  'er.' 

"  Wid  dat,  he  drapt  de  lines  on  de  dash- 
board en  went  back  atter  de  odd  boot.  Whiles 
he  gone,  de  man  what  had  de  boots  tuck  de 
calico  en  de  crockery  en  made  off  wid  um. 

"  He  hid  um  in  de  underbresh,  en  den  he 
come  back  en  lissen  fer  ter  see  what  de  yuther 


THE  MAN  AND  HIS  BOOTS.  16? 

man  gwine  do.  Well,  suh,  de  yuther  man 
come  back  wid  de  boot,  en  den  he  had  two. 
Time  he  clum  in  de  waggin  he  seed  dat  some- 
body done  steal  his  calico  en  his  crockery,  but 
he  ain't  say  nothin\  He  des  look  at  de  boots 
en  laugh. 

"  De  man  in  de  bushes  ain't  know  what  ter 
make  er  dis.  He  stood  dar,  he  did,  en  scratch 
his  head  en  study.  He  watch  de  yuther  man, 
en  fur  ez  he  kin  see  him  he  wuz  lookin'  at  de 
boots  en  laughin'.  De  man  in  de  bushes  say 
he  gwineter  see  what  de  matter  wid  dem  ar 
boots,  when  de  yuther  man  in  de  waggin  kin 
swap  off  calico  en  crockery  fer  um  en  still  feel 
good  'nuff  fer  ter  laugh.  So  de  man  in  de 
bushes  he  run  'roun'  en  head  de  yuther  man 
off,  en  met  'im  in  de  road.  He  come  drivin' 
'long,  still  lookin'  at  de  boots  en  laughin'. 
Look  like  when  he  see  de  man  in  de  road  it 
make  'im  laugh  wusser  dan  befo\ 

"  De  man  in  de  road  'low,  *  You  mus'  be 
havin'  a  mighty  heap  er  fun  all  by  yo'se'f.' 

"De  man  in  de  waggin  laugh  like  he 
gwine  ter  bus'  wide  open.  All  he  kin  say  is, 
'  Lawsy  massy  !  deze  boots  !  deze  boots  !  deze 
boots ! ' 

"  De  man  in  de  road  'low,  '  What  de  matter 


164    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

wid  de  boots,  dat  dey  er  so  mighty  funny? 
Dey  ain't  look  funny  ter  me.' 

"  De  man  in  de  waggin  look  like  he  choke 
wid  laughin.  When  he  ketch  his  breff  he  hol- 
ler, c  Oh,  deze  boots !  deze  boots !  ■ 

"Man  in  de  road  'low,  'You  ain't  gwine 
crazy,  is  you  ?  • 

"  Man  in  de  waggin  say,  <  You  'd  be  crazy 
too  ef  somebody  had  'a'  come  'long  en  drapt 
deze  boots  whar  you  could  git  um.  Lawsy 
massy !  deze  boots  ! ' 

"  Man  in  de  road  'low,  i  What  kinder  doin's 
is  deze?  You  better  lemme  git  up  dar  en 
take  you  home  ter  yo'  fambly  ! ' 

"  Man  in  de  waggin  say,  '  My  folks  '11  laugh 
too,  when  dey  know  what  I  knows ;  en  you  'd 
laugh  yo'se'f  ef  you'd  'a'  been  comin'  'long 
de  road  en  fin'  deze  boots  what  got  red  in 
de  top.' 

"  Man  in  de  road  say,  ( I  had  a  pair  des  like 
um,  en  day  ain't  make  me  laugh.' 

"  Man  in  de  waggin  say,  '  You  'd  laugh 
wusser  dan  me  ef  you  'd  er  pick  deze  boots  up 
in  de  road  en  f oun'  one  ten  dollar  bill  in  one 
un  um,  en  anudder  ten  dollar  bill  in  tudder 
one.' 

"Man  in  de  road  'low,    ' Lemme  see  dem 


M 


m  k 


THE  MAN  AND  HIS  BOOTS.  165 

boots !  —  Dey  er  mine  !  Han'  urn  here  !  I 
tuck'n  los'  um  yistiddy  whiles  I  comin'  fum 
town.     Gi'  me  de  money  ! ' 

"  Man  in  de  waggin  shet  his  eye.  He  say, 
1  You  right  sho  dey  er  yone  ? ' 

"  Man  in  de  road  'low,  '  Yes  dey  is,  en  I 
got  de  proof  un  it ! ' 

"  Man  in  de  waggin  say,  6  Well  en  good ! 
Git  up  here  en  go  along  wid  me,  en  show  de 
pToof.' 

"  Man  in  de  road  jump  up  on  de  wheel,  but 
'f  o'  he  kin  set  down  de  man  in  de  waggin  flung 
'im  back  in  de  waggin  body  en  jump  on  'im 
en  tie  'im,  en  tuck  'im  off  ter  de  calaboose. 
Dar  dey  make  'im  tell  what  he  done  wid  de 
calico  en  de  chany  ware,  en  dey  kep'  'im,  I 
dunner  how  long ;  en  'f o'  dey  turn  him  loose 
dey  tuck  'im  out  en  hit  'im  thirty-nine  on  de 
naked  hide. 

"  Co'se,"  continued  Uncle  Remus,  seeing  a 
shade  of  perplexity  on  the  little  boy's  face, 
u  de  man  in  de  waggin  ain't  fin'  no  money  in 
de  boots.  He  des  puttin'  on,  so  he  kin  fin'  de 
man  what  drap  um,  kaze  he  know  dat  right 
whar  he  fin'  de  man  dat  drap  um,  right  dar 
he  '11  fin'  de  man  what  stoled  his  calico  en 
crockery.      Dat  what  make  I  say  dat  folks 


166    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

ain't  got  no  business  mockin'  de  way  de  cree- 
turs  does.  Dey  er  bound  ter  git  cotch  up  wid, 
en  right  den  dey  er  in  deep  trouble.  Creeturs 
kin  take  what  ain't  dern,  en  tell  fibs,  en  dey 
don't  no  harm  come  fum  it ;  but  when  folks 
tries  it,  dey  er  bleedz  ter  come  ter  some  bad 
eend.     Now,  you  des  watch  um." 


XXIII. 


BBOTHER   MUD    TURTLE' S    TRICKERY. 


"  I  don't  like  deze  yer  tales  'bout  folks,  no 
how  you  kin  fix  urn,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  after 
an  unusually  long  pause,  during  which  he 
rubbed  his  left  hand  with  the  right,  in  order 
to  run  the  rheumatism  out.  "  No,  suh,  I 
don't  like  um,  kaze  folks  can't  play  no  tricks, 
ner  git  even  wid  der  neighbors,  widout  hurtin' 
somebody's  feelin's,  er  breakin'  some  law  er 
nudder,  er  gwine  'ginst  what  de  preacher  say. 

"  Look  at  dat  man  what  I  des  been  tellin' 
you  'bout.  He  let  de  udder  man  fool  'im  en 
ketch  'im,  en  mo'  dan  dat,  he  let  um  tote  'im 
off  de  calaboose.  He  oughter  been  tuck  dar ; 
I  ain't  'sputin'  dat,  yit  ef  dat  had  been  some 
er  de  creeturs,  dey  'd  er  sholy  got  loose  fum 
dar. 

"When  it  comes  ter  talkin'  'bout  gittin' 
loose,"  Uncle  Remus  continued,  settling  him- 
self comfortably  in  his  chair,  "  I  git  ter  run- 
nin'  on  in  my  min'  'bout  ole  Brer  Fox  en 


168    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY, 

ole  Brer  Mud  Turkle.  Dey  had  some  Mnder 
fallin'  out  once  'pon  a  time.  I  dunner  jwhat. 
I  speck  hit 's  got  a  tale  hung  on  it,  but  de 
tale  done  switch  itself  out'n  my  min\  Yit 
dey  'd  done  had  a  fallin,  out,  en  dey  want 
no  love  los'  betwixt  um.  Well,  suh,  one  day 
Brer  Fox  wuz  gwine  down  de  creek  fishin'. 
Little  ez  you  may  think  un  it,  Brer  Fox  was 
monst'us  fon'  er  fishes,  so  eve'y  chance  he 
got  he  'd  go  fishin\" 

"  On  Sunday,  too  ? "  inquired  the  little 
boy.  He  had  been  lectured  on  that  subject 
not  long  before. 

"  Well,  I  tell  you  now,"  replied  Uncle  Ee- 
mus,  laughing,  "  Brer  Fox  is  like  'oman's 
tongue,  he  ain't  got  no  Sunday." 

"What  kind  of  bait  did  he  have?"  the 
youngster  asked. 

"What  he  want  wid  bait,  honey?  He 
ain't  got  no  bait,  en  no  pole,  en  no  hook. 
He  des  went  down  de  creek,  en  when  he  come 
ter  a  good  place,  he  'd  wade  in  en  feel  und' 
de  rocks  en  und'  de  bank.  Sometimes  he  'd 
ketch  a  horny-head,  en  den  ag'in  he  'd  ketch 
a  peerch.  Well,  suh,  he  went  on  en  went  on? 
en  he  had  bad  luck.  Look  like  de  fishes  wuz 
all  gone  fum  home,  but  he  kep'  on,  en  kep* 


BROTHER  MUD  TURTLE'S  TRICKERY.      169 

on.  He  'low  ter  hisse'f  dat  he  bleedz  ter 
have  some  fish  fer  dinner.  One  time  he  put 
his  han'  in  a  crawfish  nes'  en  got  nipt,  en 
anudder  time  he  tetched  a  eel,  en  it  made  de 
col'  chills  run  'cross  'im.     Yit  he  kep'  on. 

"  Bimeby  Brer  Fox  come  ter  whar  ole  Brer 
Mud  Turkle  live  at.  I  dunner  what  make  ole 
Brer  Mud  Turkle  live  in  such  a  damp  place 
like  dat.  Look  like  him  en  his  folks  'ud  have 
a  bad  col'  de  whole  blessid  time.  But  dar  he 
wuz  in  de  water  und'  de  bank,  layin'  dar  fas' 
asleep,  dreamin'  'bout  de  good  times  he  'd  have 
when  de  freshet  come.  He  'uz  layin'  dar  wid 
his  eyes  shot,  when  de  fus'  news  he  know  he 
feel  sump'n  nudder  fumblin'  'roun'  his  head. 
'T  wan't  nobody  but  ole  Brer  Fox  f eelin'  'roun' 
und'  de  bank  fer  fishes. 

"  Brer  Mud  Turkle  move  his  head,  he  did, 
but  de  fumblin'  kep'  on,  en  bimeby  he  open 
his  mouf  en  Brer  Fox  fumble  en  fumble,  twel 
bimeby  he  got  'is  han'  in  dar,  en  time  he  do 
dat,  ole  Brer  Mud  Turkle  shet  down  on  it. 
En  I  let  you  know,"  continued  Uncle  Remus, 
shaking  his  head  slowly  from  side  to  side 
as  if  to  add  emphasis  to  the  statement,  "  I  let 
you  know  when  ole  Brer  Mud  Turkle  shet 
down  on  yo'   han',  you  got  ter  cut   off   his 


170    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

head,  en  den  wait  twel  it  thunder  'f  o'  he  turn 
loose. 

"  Well,  suh,  he  shet  down  on  ole  Brer  Fox, 
en  ef  you  'd  'a'  been  anywhars  in  dat  settle- 
ment you  'd  'a'  heard  squallin'  den  ef  you  ain't 
never  hear  none  befo\ 

"  Brer  Fox  des  hilt  his  head  back  en  holler 
'Ouch!  Ouch!  What  dis  got  me?  Ouch! 
Turn  me  aloose  !  Ouch  !  Somebody  better 
run  here  quick !     Laws  a  massy !     Ouch  ! ' 

"  But  Brer  Mud  Turkle,  he  helt  on,  en  he 
feel  so  much  comfort  dat  he'd  er  in  about 
went  ter  asleep  ag'in  ef  Brer  Fox  had  n't  er 
snatched  en  jerked  so  hard  en  a-holler'd  so 
loud. 

"Brer  Fox  holler,  en  Brer  Mud  Turkle 
hoi'  on  —  Brer  Fox  holler,  en  Brer  Mud  Tur- 
kle hoi'  on.  Dar  dey  wuz  —  nip  en  tug, 
holler  en  hoi'  fas' !  Bimeby  it  hurt  so  bad 
dat  Brer  Fox  des  fetched  one  loud  squall  en 
made  one  big  pull,  en  out  come  ole  Brer  Mud 
Turkle,  a-hangin'  ter  his  han'. 

"  Well,  suh,  when  dey  got  out  on  de  bank 
en  Brer  Mud  Turkle  sorter  woke  up,  he  tuck'n 
turn  Brer  Fox  loose  widout  waitin'  fer  de 
thunder.  He  ax  Brer  Fox  pardon,  but  Brer 
Fox,  he  ain't  got  no  pardon  fer  ter  gi'  'im. 


BROTHER  MUD  TURTLE'S  TRICKERY.     Ill 

"  Brer  Mud  Turkle  make  like  he  skeer'd. 
He  'low,  '  I  'clar'  ter  gracious,  Brer  Fox  !  Ef 
I'd  a  know'd  't  wuz  you,  I  'd  'a'  never  shet 
down  on  you  in  de  roun'  worl' ;  kaze  I  know 
what  a  danger  some  man  you  is.  I  know'd 
yo'  daddy  befo'  you,  en  he  wuz  a  dangersome 
man.' 

"  But  Brer  Fox  'fuse  ter  lissen  ter  dafc 
kinder  talk.  He  say,  i  I  been  wantin'  you  a 
long  time,  en  now  I  got  you.  I  got  you 
right  where  I  want  you,  en  when  I  git  thoo 
wid  you,  yo'  own  folks  would  n't  know  you, 
ef  dey  wuz  ter  meet  you  in  de  middle  er  de 
road.' 

"  Brer  Mud  Turkle  cry  on  one  side  his  face 
en  laugh  on  tudder.  He  'low,  c  Please,  suh, 
Brer  Fox,  des  let  me  off  dis  time,  en  I  '11  be 
good  friend  'long  wid  you  all  de  balance  er 
de  time.  Please,  suh,  Brer  Fox,  let  me  off 
dis  time ! ' 

"  Brer  Fox  say,  '  Oh,  yes !  I  '11  let  you  off, 
I  'm  all  de  time  a-lettin'  off  folks  what  bite 
me  ter  de  bone !  Oh,  yes !  I  '11  let  you  off, 
but  I  '11  take  en  skin  you  fust.' 

"Brer  Mud  Turkle  'low,  '  Spozen  I  ain't 
got  no  hide  on  me  —  den  what  you  gwine  to 
do?' 


172    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Fox  grit  his  tushes.  He  say,  ■  Ef 
you  ain't  got  no  hide,  I  '11  fin'  de  place  whar 
de  hide  oughter  be  —  dat  's  what ! ' 

"Wid  dat,  he  make  a  grab  at  Brer  Mud 
Turkle's  neck,  but  Brer  Mud  Turkle  draw  his 
head  en  his  foots  und'  his  shell,  en  quile  up 
his  tail,  en  dar  he  wuz.  He  so  ole  and  tough 
he  got  moss  on  his  shell.  Brer  Fox  fool  wid 
'im,  en  gnyaw  en  gouge  at  de  shell,  but  he  des 
might  ez  well  gnyaw  en  gouge  at  a  flint  rock. 
He  work  en  he  work,  but  't  ain't  do  no  good ; 
he  can't  git  Brer  Mud  Turkle  out  er  his  house 
no  way  he  kin  fix  it. 

"Ole  Brer  Mud  Turkle  talk  at  'im.  He 
'low,  '  Hard  ain't  no  name  f er  it,  Brer  Fox  ! 
You  '11  be  jimber-jaw'd  long  'fo'  you  gnyaw 
thoo  my  hide  ! ' 

"  Brer  Fox  gnyaw  en  gouge,  en  gouge  en 
gnyaw. 

"  Brer  Mud  Turkle  'low, 6  Dey  ain't  but  one 
way  f er  ter  git  dat  shell  off,  Brer  Fox  ! ' 

"  Brer  Fox  'fuse  ter  make  answer.  He 
gouge  en  gynaw,  en  gnyaw  en  gouge. 

"Brer  Mud  Turkle  'low,  '  Tushes  ain't 
gwine  git  it  off !  Claws  ain't  gwine  git  it  off  ! 
Yit  mud  en  water  will  do  de  work.  Now 
I  'm  gwine  ter  sleep.' 


BROTHER  MUD  TURTLE'S  TRICKERY.     173        f 

"  Brer  Fox  gnyaw  en  gouge,  en  gouge  en 
gnyaw,  en  bimeby  he  git  tired,  mo'  speshually 
when  he  hear  ole  Brer  Mud  Turkle  layin'  in 
dar  snorin'  des  like  somebody  sawin'  gourds. 
Den  he  sot  down  en  watch  Brer  Mud  Turkle, 
but  he  ain't  move.     He  do  des  like  he  sleep. 

"  Den  Brer  Fox  git  de  idee  dat  he  '11  play  a 
trick  on  Brer  Mud  Turkle.  He  holler  out, 
'  Good-by,  Brer  Mud  Turkle !  You  er  too 
much  fer  me  dis  time.  My  han'  hurt  me  so 
bad,  I  got  ter  go  home  en  git  a  poultice  on  it. 
But  I  '11  pay  you  back  ef  hit 's  de  las'  ac' ! ' 

"  Brer  Fox  make  like  he  gwine  off,  but  he 
des  run  'roun'  en  hid  in  de  bushes.  Yit  does 
you  speck  he  gwine  fool  Brer  Mud  Turkle  ? 
Shoo,  honey !  Dat  creetur  got  moss  on  his 
back,  en  he  got  so  much  sense  in  his  head  his 
eyes  look  red.  He  des  lay  dar,  ole  Brer  Mud 
Turkle  did,  en  sun  hisse'f  same  ez  ef  he  wuz 
on  a  rock  in  de  creek.  He  lay  dar  so  still  dat 
Brer  Fox  got  his  impatients  stirred  up,  en  he 
come  out  de  bushes  en  went  ter  Brer  Mud 
Turkle  en  shuck  'im  up  en  ax'd  'im  how  he 
gwine  git  de  shell  off. 

"  Brer  Mud  Turkle  'low,  <  Tushes  ain't 
gwine  git  it  off  !  Claws  ain't  gwine  git  it 
off !     Yit  mud  en  water  will  do  de  work ! ' 


174    UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Brer  Fox  say,  '  Don't  riddle  me  no  rid- 
dles. Up  en  tell  me  like  a  man  how  I  gwine 
ter  git  yo'  shell  off ! ' 

"  Brer  Mud  Turkle  'low,  '  Put  me  in  de  mud 
en  rub  my  back  hard  ez  you  kin.  Den  de  shell 
bleedz  ter  come  off.  Dat  de  reason  dey  calls 
me  Brer  Mud  Turkic' 

"  Well,  suh,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  laughing 
heartily,  "  Brer  Fox  ain't  got  no  better  sense 
dan  ter  b'lieve  all  dat  truck,  so  he  tuck  en 
shove  Brer  Mud  Turkle  'long  twel  he  got  'im 
in  de  mud,  en  den  he  'gun  ter  rub  on  his  back 
like  somebody  curryin'  a  hoss.  What  happen 
den  ?  Well,  dey  ain't  nothin'  't  all  happen, 
'ceppin'  what  bleedz  ter  happen.  De  mo'  he 
rub  on  de  back,  de  deeper  Brer  Mud  Turkle 
go  in  de  mud.  Bimeby,  whiles  Brer  Fox  wuz 
rubbin'  right  hard,  Brer  Mud  Turkle  sorter 
gun  hisse'f  a  flirt  en  went  down  out  er  reach. 
Co'se  dis  make  Brer  Fox  splunge  in  de  water, 
en  a  little  mo'  en  he  'd  a  drown' ded  right  den 
en  dar.  He  went  out  on  de  bank,  he  did,  en 
whiles  he  settin'  dar  dryin'  hisse'f  he  know'd 
dat  Brer  Mud  Turkle  wuz  laughin'  at  'im,  kaze 
he  kin  see  de  signs  un  it." 

The  little  boy  laughed,  but  he  shook  his 
head  increduously. 


BROTHER  MUD  TURTLE'S  TRICKERY.      175 

"  Well,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  ef  you  gwine 
ter  'spute  dat,  you  des  ez  well  ter  stan*  up  en 
face  me  down  'bout  de  whole  tale.  Kaze  when 
Brer  Fox  see  bubbles  risin'  on  de  water  en 
f  ollerin'  atter  one  anudder  he  bleedz  ter  know 
dat  Brer  Mud  Turkle  down  under  dar  laughin' 
fit  ter  kill  hisse'f." 

This  settled  the  matter.  The  child  was  con^ 
vinced. 


XXIV. 

HOW   THE    KING   RECRUITED    HIS   ARMY. 

One  day  Uncle  Remus  had  occasion  several 
times  to  go  to  his  "  Miss  Sally  "  with  informa- 
tion about  some  incident,  accident,  or  happen- 
ing on  the  plantation.  Each  time  his  mistress 
would  say,  "  Did  n't  I  tell  you  so  ?  "  She  had, 
in  fact,  said  to  him  the  night  before,  when  the 
little  boy's  father  was  preparing  to  take  a 
short  journey  away  from  home,  that  she  was 
certain  everything  would  go  to  ruin  on  the 
place.  Uncle  Remus,  on  the  other  hand,  had 
assured  her  that  everything  would  go  along 
all  right.  It  happened,  however,  that  every- 
thing seemed  to  go  wrong.  A  mule  ran  over 
a  calf  and  hurt  it.  A  cow  trying  to  get  out 
of  the  way  of  the  mule  had  her  horn  knocked 
off,  and  the  mule,  a  little  later,  snagged  itself 
on  the  end  of  a  fence  rail.  Consequently, 
when  Uncle  Remus  went  to  tell  his  mistress  of 
these  things,  making  three  several  visits,  the 


HOW  THE  KING  RECRUITED  HIS  ARMY.    Ill 

lady  exclaimed,  with  increasing  emphasis  each 
time,  "  Did  n't  I  tell  you  so  ?  " 

Finally  Uncle  Remus  remarked,  as  he  was 
going  away :  "  Nex'  time  I  come,  Miss  Sally, 
I  'm  gwine  ter  tell  you  de  cow  done  swaller'd 
de  gritstone." 

Whereat  his  mistress  laughed  and  told  him 
not  to  worry  her  any  more.  The  little  boy 
happened  to  hear  the  remark  about  the  cow 
swallowing  the  grindstone,  and  so  he  followed 
the  old  man  to  find  out  something  about  it. 

"Dat  what  you  taggin'  atter  me  'bout?" 
said  Uncle  Remus.  "  Well,  goodness  knows ! 
it  done  got  so  now  dat  folks  can't  open  der 
mouf  but  what  dey  got  ter  be  tagged  at,  en 
nagged  at,  kaze  udder  folks  git  de  idee  dat 
dey  's  a  tale  some'rs  behime  it.  I  thank  my 
stars  dey  ain't  no  tale  in  dat  grinestone,  kaze 
dey  ain't  no  livin'  man  kin  set  flat  down  en 
tell  tales  while  dish  yer  plantation  gwine  ter 
rack  en  ruin.  Marse  John  '11  row  me  up  de 
river  when  he  come  back  here  en  fin'  de  whole 
blessid  place  turned  wrongsud-outerds.  I  'm 
dat  pestered  I  dunner  whedder  I  'm  eend 
uperds  er  eend  downerds ! " 

"  Well,  Uncle  Remus,"  persisted  the  little 
boy,  "  how  can  a  cow  swallow  a  grindstone  ?  " 


178    UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Dar  now  !  "  exclaimed  the  old  man,  stop- 
ping suddenly  and  staring  at  the  child  ;  "  des 
lissen  at  dat !  No  wonder  I  'm  gittin'  bal'- 
headed  en  wobbly  in  de  legs.  Mules  en  cows 
gwine  ter  rack,  Miss  Sally  hollerin'  '  I  tole 
you  so  ! '  en  chilluns  gwine  'roun'  axin'  'bout 
cows  swallin'  grinestones.  Ef  dat  ain't  'nuff 
fer  ter  run  anybody  ravin'  'stracted,  I  wish 
you  'd  tell  me  what  is !  " 

"  Well,  you  said  something  to  mamma  about 
a  cow  swallowing  a  grindstone,"  remarked  the 
boy,  confidently. 

"  Oh ! "  said  Uncle  Remus,  «  dat 's  diffunt ! 
Now  I  know  what  you  talkin'  'bout!  Man, 
suh !  you  had  me  skeer'd.  My  min'  wuz  up 
yander  at  de  corn-crib  wid  dat  fool  mule  what 
snag  hisse'f,  en  when  I  hear  you  talk  'bout 
cow  eatin'  grinestone,  I  'lowed  dat  I  had  mo' 
trouble  on  my  han's.  Dat  what  I  tole  Miss 
Sally  ain't  got  no  tale  behime  it.  Hit 's  des  a 
sayin'. 

"  It  seem  like  dey  wuz  a  man,  which  had  a 
wife,  en  eve'y  time  sump'n  'd  happen,  she  up 
en  'low,  '  I  tole  you  so  I '  Hit  kep  on  dis 
away,  twel  one  day  dish  yer  man  seed  de  cow 
run  thoo  de  yard  en  turn  over  de  grinestone. 
So  de  man,  he  run  en  tell  his  wife  dat  de  cow 


HOW  THE  KING  RECRUITED  HIS  ARMY,    179 

done  swaller'd  de  grinestone,  en  she  up'n  say, 
'Itoleyouso!'" 

But,  after  all,  the  saying  reminded  Uncle 
Kemus  of  a  story,  and  he  told  it  by  fits  and 
starts,  while  he  was  looking  after  the  welfare 
of  the  wounded  mule,  and  the  crippled  calf, 
and  the  cow  with  the  broken  horn. 

"  One  time,  dey  wuz  a  boy,  en  dish  yer  boy 
wuz  mighty  smart.  He  wuz  like  a  slick  thrip 
—  little  but  ole.  I  dunner  what  dey  call  'im 
in  dem  times,  but  in  deze  days  we  'd  call  'im  a 
runt,  en  laugh  at  'im.  Well,  dish  yer  boy  had 
a  head  on  'im.  He  look  like  he  dried  up,  but 
nummine  dat.  Dem  what  got  ahead  er  'im 
had  ter  git  up  long  'fo'  day,  en  ef  dey  ain't 
take  keer  dey  'd  fin'  'im  up  befo'  um. 

"  One  season,  when  de  blackberries  wuz 
ripe,  he  went  'roun'  en  tole  de  folks  dat  ef 
dey  'd  take  der  baskets  en  der  buckets  en  go 
out  en  git  de  blackberries,  he'd  gi'  um  half 
dey  pick.  Hit  been  so  seldom  dat  de  folks 
git  a  chance  f  er  ter  make  any  extry  money  dat 
dey  mighty  glad  ter  have  de  chance  ter  pick 
blackberries.  So  dey  all  went  out  en  pick  en 
pick,  twel  dey  pick  two  waggin  loads  un  um. 
Well,  dis  yer  swunk  up  boy,  wbich  he  look 
like  he  ain't  got  no  sense  skacely,  he  'vide  fa'r, 


180    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

dey  ain't  no  two  ways  'bout  dat.  He  tuck  half 
en  gi'  urn  der  half  back." 

"  What  was  his  name,  Uncle  Kemus  ? " 
asked  the  little  boy,  somewhat  interested  in 
this  remarkable  transaction. 

"  Linktum  Lidy  Lody,"  the  old  man  an- 
swered promptly.  "  I  had  de  idee  I  done  tole 
you  dat.  But  nummine  !  Dat  what  dey  call 
'im,  en  dat  what  he  call  hisse'f —  Linktum 
Tidlum  Tidy.  Hit  run  'long  so  funny  dat  I 
dunntr  wharbouts  de  fergiven  name  stops  at 
en  wharbouts  de  f  ambly  name  begins  at.  Fer 
short  en  sweet  dey  call  'im  Tinktum  Tidy. 

"  Well,  dish  yer  Tinktum  Tidlum,  he  'vide 
out  far  wid  de  folks.  He  tuck  his  half  er  de 
blackberries  en  gi'  um  der  half.  Dey  want  no 
'sputin'  'bout  it.  But  den  when  de  folks  git 
der  half,  dey  ax  deyse'f  what  dey  gwine  do 
wid  it.  Dey  want  ter  sell  it  ter  Tinktum  Tidy, 
but  he  'low  he  got  des  ez  much  blackberries  ez 
he  know  what  ter  do  wid.  Atter  a  while  de 
folks  say  dat  ef  dey  can't  sell  der  share  er  de 
blackberries,  dey  des  ez  well  put  um  in  Tink- 
tum Tidy's  pile,  en  dat  what  dey  done;  en  den 
he  tuck  de  two  waggin  loads  to  town  en  sold 
um  fer  de  cash  money. 

"Bimeby  some   er  de   mo'  longer  headed 


HOW  THE  KING  RECRUITED  HIS  ARMY.    181 

folks  sot  down  en  got  ter  studyin'  'bout  it,  en 
dey  ax  deyse'f  how  come  dey  got  ter  go  out 
en  pick  blackberries  f er  dat  little  bit  er  swunk 
up  chap.  Dey  study  en  study,  but  de  mo' 
dey  study  de  mo'  foolish  dey  feel. 

"Well,  suh,  de  tale  got  out,  en  it  travel 
'roun'  en  'roun'  twel  de  King  got  wind  un  it, 
en  he  tuck  en  sont  fer  Tinktum  Tidy.  Dis 
make  de  folks  what  pick  de  blackberries 
mighty  glad,  kaze  dey  got  de  idee  dat  de 
King  gwine  ter  put  de  little  swunk  up  chap 
in  de  calaboose  fer  foolin'  um.  But  Tinktum 
Tidy  ain't  skeer'd.  He  wrop  up  a  change  er 
cloze  in  his  hankcher,  en  put  out  ter  whar  de 
King  stay  at.  Some  er  de  folks  went  'long 
fer  ter  see  what  gwine  ter  come  er  de  little 
swunk  up  chap  what  fool  um. 

u  Bimeby  dey  got  ter  whar  de  King  live,  en 
Tinktum  Tidy  des  march  right  'long  in,  en 
tole  um  dat  de  King  done  sont  fer  'im.  Dey 
tuck  'im  in  a  big  room  whar  dey  wuz  a  whole 
passel  er  yuther  folks,  en  tole  'im  ter  wait  dar 
twel  de  King  come.  Eve'ybody  look  at  'im 
hard,  he  wuz  so  swunk  up  en  puny,  en  he 
look  right  back  at  um,  des  like  he  wuz  one  er 
de  quality.  Atter  while,  here  come  de  King. 
Time  he  got  settled  on  de  flatform,  his  eye 


182    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

drapt  on  Tinktum  Tidy,  en  he  ax  what  dat  ar 
runt  doin'  dar. 

"  Dey  up'n  tell  de  King  dat  dat 's  de  chap 
what  make  de  folks  pick  so  much  blackberries. 
When  de  King  hear  dis,  he  lay  back  en  laugh 
fit  ter  kill  hisse'f .  He  call  Tinktum  Tidy  up 
en  ax  'im  all  'bout  how  he  been  doin',  en  den 
he  'low,  de  King  did,  dat  Tinktum  Tidy  mus' 
be  mighty  smart.  But  Tinktum  Tidy,  he  say 
dat  't  ain't  him  dat 's  smart,  hit 's  de  folks 
what  pick  de  blackberries,  kaze  folks  what 
kin  pick  dat  much  in  so  little  time  is  bleedz 
ter  be  smart. 

"  Den  de  King  run  his  han'  in  his  pocket 
en  pull  out  lev'm  grains  er  corn.  He  'low, 
6  Take  dish  yer  corn  en  do  what  you  please 
wid  it,  but  de  crap  I  want  f  um  it  is  'lev'm 
strong  men  f er  ter  put  in  my  army.' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  tuck  de  corn  en  tie  it  up 
in  one  cornder  er  his  hankcher.  He  'low, 
'  Not  countin'  harrycanes  en  high  water,  I  '11 
be  back  in  a  fortnight.  Ef  'lev'm  strong  men 
wuz  ez  easy  ter  pick  ez  blackberries,  I  'd  sen' 
some  yuther  folks,  but  I  '11  hatter  go  atter  de 
men  myse'f.' 

"  Wid  dat  he  make  his  bow,  he  did,  en  tuck 
his  foot  in  his  han'  en  put  out.     He  travel  all 


HOW  THE  KING  RECRUITED  HIS  ARMY.    183 

dat  day,  en  'bout  night  he  come  ter  a  tavern, 
en  dar  he  stop.  De  man  ax  'im  whar  he  come 
fum,  what  his  name,  en  whar  he  gwine.  He 
say  he  come  fum  Chuckerluckertown,  en  he 
name  Tinktum  Tidy,  en  he  gwine  on  a  long 
journey.  When  bedtime  come,  he  call  de  man 
in  de  room  en  show  'im  de  corn. 

"  He  'low,  '  Here  de  'lev'm  grains  er  corn 
de  King  gi'  me.  I  '11  lay  it  on  de  table.  I  'm 
feard  de  Big  Gander  gwine  ter  eat  it.' 

"  De  man  say  he  '11  shet  de  door  so  de  Big 
Gander  can't  git  it.  Den  dey  all  went  ter  bed. 
Tinktum  Tidy  wait  twel  eve'ybody  got  still,  en 
den  he  got  up  en  drapt  de  corn  thoo  de  crack 
er  de  floor.     Den  he  went  ter  sleep. 

"  Nex'  mornin'  he  wake  up  soon  en  'larm 
de  neighborhood.  He  holler  out :  c  I  tole  you 
so !  I  tole  you  so  !  De  Big  Gander  done  eat 
de  'lev'm  grains  er  corn  what  de  King  gi'  me  ! 
De  Big  Gander  done  eat  de  'lev'm  grains  er 
corn  de  King  gi'  me  ! ' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  holler  so  loud  en  so  long 
dat  he  skeer  de  man.  Den  de  man's  ole  'oman, 
she  stuck  'er  head  out  de  winder  en  sot  up  a 
squall. 

"  She  say,  '  Take  de  Big  Gander  en  go  on 
off  fum  here  !     Take  'im  en  go  ! ' 


184    UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  tuck  de  Big  Gander  und' 
his  arm  en  went  polin'  down  de  big  road.  He 
travel  all  dat  day  twel  night,  en  he  come  ter 
an  udder  town,  en  he  went  en  put  up  at  de  tav- 
ern. When  bedtime  come,  he  tied  de  gander 
by  de  leg  ter  de  bedstid,  en  den  he  call  de  mam 

"  Here  de  Big  Gander  dat  eat  'lev'm  grains 
er  corn  dat  de  King  gi'  me.  I  '11  tie  'im  here, 
kaze  I  'm  feard  de  Boo-Boo  Black  Sheep  '11 
kill  'im.' 

u  Man  say,  '  Black  Sheep  can't  git  'im  here.' 

"  In  de  middle  er  de  night  Tinktum  Tidy 
got  up  en  broke  de  Big  Gander's  neck  en  flung 
'im  out  in  de  barn-yard.  Nex'  mornin'  he  got 
up  soon,  en  'gun  ter  holler. 

He  'low,  '  I  tole  you  so !  I  tole  you  so ! 
Boo-Boo  Black  Sheep  done  kill  de  Big  Gan- 
der dat  eat  the  'lev'm  grains  er  corn  de  King 
gi'  me ! ' 

"  When  de  man  hear  talk  er  de  King,  he  got 
skeer'd.  Hit  make  'im  shake  in  his  shoes.  He 
say,  t  Take  Boo-Boo  Black  Sheep  en  go  'long  I 
You  done  fetch  me  bad  luck ! ' 

"Den  Tinktum  Tidy  fastened  Boo-Boo 
Black  Sheep  wid  a  rope,  en  led  'im  off  down 
de  big  road.  Bimeby  he  come  ter  whar  dey 
wuz  anudder  town,  en  he  went  en  put  up  at 


HOW  THE  KING  RECRUITED  HIS  ARMY.    185 

de  tavern.  When  bedtime  come  he  call  de 
man. 

"  He  'low,  c  Here  Boo-Boo  Black  Sheep  dat 
kill  de  Big  Gander,  dat  eat  de  'lev'm  grains 
er  corn  de  King  gi'  me.  I  '11  tie  'im  here  ter 
de  bedstid  kaze  I  'm  feard  de  Brindle  Cow  '11 
hook  'im.' 

"  Man  say,  '  Brindle  Cow  can't  git  'im  in 
here.' 

"  'Twix'  midnight  en  day,  Tinktum  Tidy 
got  up  en  kill  de  Black  Sheep  en  put  'im  in  de 
lot  wid  de  Brindle  Cow.  Den  he  got  up  soon 
in  de  mornin',  en  'gun  ter  holler. 

"  He  'low,  '  I  tole  you  so  !  I  tole  you  so  ! 
De  Brindle  Cow  done  kill  Boo-Boo  Black 
Sheep  dat  kill  de  Big  Gander  dat  eat  de  'lev'm 
grains  er  corn  de  King  gi'  me ! ' 

"  Dis  make  de  man  feel  skeer'd.  He  say, 
6  Take  de  Brindle  Cow  en  go  ! ' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  led  de  Brindle  Cow  off  down 
de  road  en  make  his  way  ter  de  nex'  town. 
He  got  dar  by  de  time  night  come,  en  put  up 
at  de  tavern.  When  bedtime  come,  he  tuck 
en  call  de  man. 

"  He  'low,  '  Here  de  Brindle  Cow  dat  kill 
de  Boo-Boo  Black  Sheep  dat  kill  de  Big  Gan- 
der dat  eat  de  'lev'm  grains  er  corn  de  King 


186    UNCLE  BEMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

gi'  me.  I  '11  tie  'er  here  by  de  chimbley,  whar 
de  Koan  Hoss  can't  git  'er.' 

"  De  man  say,  6 1  know  mighty  well  de  Roan 
Hoss  can't  git  'er  here.' 

"Des  'fo'  day  Tinktum  Tidy  tuck  de  Brin- 
dle  Cow  in  de  stable  en  made  way  wid  'er. 
Den  when  daylight  come  he  'gun  ter  holler. 

"  He  'low,  '  I  tole  you  so !  I  tole  you  so  i 
De  Roan  Hoss  done  kill  de  Brindle  Cow  dat 
kill  de  Boo-Boo  Black  Sheep  dat  kill  de  Big 
Gander  dat  eat  the  'lev'm  grains  er  corn  de 
King  gi'  me.' 

"  De  man  git  skeer'd  when  he  hear  de  name 
er  de  King,  en  he  say,  6  Take  de  Roan  Hoss 
en  go  on  whar  you  gwine  ! ' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  got  on  de  Roan  Hoss  en 
went  trottin'  down  de  big  road.  He  went  on 
en  went  on,  he  did,  twel  he  come  ter  a  place 
whar  he  had  ter  cross  a  creek.  Close  by  de 
road  he  seed  a  ole  man  settin'.  He  look  at 
de  ole  man  en  de  ole  man  look  at  'im. 

"  Bimeby  de  ole  man  say,  i  Howdy,  son  ! ' 
Tinktum  Tidy  say,  '  Howdy,  Gran 'sir  ! ' 

"  De  ole  man  'low,  '  Son,  come  wipe  my 
eyes ! ' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  say,  ( I  '11  wipe  um,  Gran'- 
eir,  ef  so  be  it  '11  do  you  any  good.'     Den  he 


HOW  THE  KING  RECRUITED  HIS  ARMY.    187 

got  down  off'n  de  Roan  Hoss  en  wipe  de  ole 
man's  eyes. 

"  De  ole  man  say, i  Thanky-do,  son  !  thanky- 
do  ! '  Tinktum  Tidy  say,  '  You  er  mo'  dan 
welcome,  Gran' sir ! '  Den  he  got  on  de  Roan 
Hoss  en  wuz  'bout  ter  ride  off. 

"  De  ole  man  'low,  6  Son,  come  scratch  my 
head ! ' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  say,  '  I  '11  scratch  yo'  head, 
Gran' sir,  ef  so  be  it  '11  do  you  any  good.' 
Den  he  got  down  off'n  de  Roan  Hoss  en  scratch 
de  ole  man's  head. 

"  De  ole  man  say,  '  Thanky-do,  son  !  thanky- 
do  ! '  Tinktum  Tidy  say,  '  You  er  mo'  dan 
welcome,  Gran'sir ! ' 

"  Den  he  start  fer  ter  ride  off  ag'in,  but  de 
ole  man  'low,  '  Son,  come  he'p  me  up  ! ' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  say,  { I  'U  he'p  you  up, 
Gran'sir,  ef  so  be  it  '11  do  you  any  good ! ' 

"  So  he  went  en  he'ped  'im  up,  en  it  seem 
like  dat  when  de  ole  man  got  on  his  foots  his 
strenk  come  back.  He  straighten  up,  he  did, 
en  look  lots  younger  dan  what  he  did. 

"  He  'low,  '  Son,  I  been  settin'  here  gwine 
on  ten  year,  en  you  er  de  onliest  one  dat  ever 
do  what  I  ax  um.  Some  laugh  at  me,  en  some 
cuss  at  me,  but  all  went  on  der  way,  en  eve'y 


188    UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  LITTLE  BOY. 

one  dat  pass  fell  in  wid  'lev'm  robbers  whaf 
live  down  de  road  a  piece  en  got  robbed, 
Now  bein's  ez  you  done  what  I  axt  you,  I  'm 
mo'  dan  willin'  fer  ter  do  what  you  ax  me.' 

"  Wid  dat,  Tinktum  Tidy  up  en  tole  de  ole 
man  how  come  he  ter  be  gwine  'long  dar,  en 
'bout  how  de  King  want  'im  ter  fetch  back 
'lev'm  strong  men  fer  ter  go  in  de  army. 

"  De  ole  man  'low,  '  Son,  dey  er  waitin'  fer 
you  right  down  de  road.  Keep  right  on  twel 
you  come  ter  whar  dey 's  a  big  white  house. 
Ride  'roun'  dat  house  sev'm  times  one  way  en 
sev'm  times  de  udder  way,  en  say  de  words  dat 
come  in  yo'  head.  Don't  git  skeer'd,  kase  I 
won't  be  so  mighty  fur  off.' 

"  Tinktum  Tidy  rid  off  down  de  road,  he  did, 
en  went  on  twel  he  come  ter  de  big  white 
house.  Den  he  rid  'roun'  it  sev'm  times  one 
way  en  sev'm  times  de  udder  way. 

"  He  'low,  '  Dis  is  de  Roan  Hoss  dat  kill  de 
Brindle  Cow  dat  kill  de  Boo-Boo  Black  Sheep 
dat  kill  de  Big  Gander  dat  eat  de  'lev'm  grains 
er  corn  de  King  gi'  me.  I  want  lev'm  strong 
men  fer  de  King's  army.' 

"  En  bless  yo'  soul,  honey !  "  exclaimed  Un- 
cle Remus,  by  way  of  emphasis,  "  de  door  er 
de  big  white  house  flew'd  open,  en 'lev'm  strong 


HOW  THE  KING  BECBUITED  HIS  ABMY.    189 

men  come  marchin'  out.  By  dat  time  de  ole 
man  had  come  up,  en  dey  ax  'im  what  dey 
mus'  do. 

"  He  'low,  '  Mount  yo'  hosses,  sons,  en  go 
jine  de  King's  army ! ' 

"So  dey  went,  en  de  King  wuz  mighty 
proud.  He  look  'roun'  at  eve'ybody  en  say, 
*  I  tole  you  so  ! '  en  he  fix  it  up  so  dat  Tinktum 
Tidy  hed  des  ez  much  ez  he  kin  eat  en  w'ar, 
en  mighty  little  work  f  er  ter  do  all  de  balance 
er  his  days." 


HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 


HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 


I. 

THE  PLOUGH-HANDS'   SONG. 

[The  italics  serve  to  mark  what  may  be  called  the  refrain 
choruses.  The  variable  nature  of  these  gives  unexpected 
coloring,  not  to  say  humor,  to  the  songs  in  which  they  oc- 
cur. Any  typographical  arrangement  of  these  choruses  must 
be,  in  the  very  nature  of  things,  awkward  and  ineffective.] 


Nigger  mighty  happy  w'en  he  layin'  by  co'n  — 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantin' ; 
Nigger  mighty  happy  w'en  he  year  de  dinner- 
ho'n  — 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantin' ; 
En  he  mo'  happy  still  w'en  de  night  draws  on  — 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantin' ; 
Dat  sun  's  a-slantin'  des  ez  sho  's  you  bo'n ! 
En  it 's  rise  up,  Primus !  fetch  anudder  yell : 
Dat  ole  dun  cow  des  a-shakin'  up  'er  bell, 
En  de  frogs  chunin'  up  'f o'  de  jew  done  fell : 
Good-night,  Mr.  Killdee  1 1  wish  you  mighty  well ! 
—  Mr,  Killdee  !  I  wish  you  mighty  well ! 
I  wish  you  mighty  well! 


194  HIS  SONOS  AND  BALLADS. 

n. 
De  00*11  '11  be  ready  'g*inst  dumplin'  day, 

Dat  sun 's  a-slantin* ; 
But  nigger  gotter  watch,  en  stick,  en  stay, 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantin' ; 
Same  ez  de  bee-martin  watchin'  un  de  jay, 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantm' ; 
Dat  sun 's  a-slantin*  en  a-slippin*  away ! 
Den  it 's  rise  up,  Primus !  en  gin  it  t'  um  strong : 
De  cow 's  gwine  home  wid  der  ding-dang-dong ; 
Sling  in  anudder  tetch  er  de  ole  time  song : 
Good-night,  Mr.  Whipperwill !  dorit  stay  long  1 
—  Mr,  Whipperwill !  dorit  stay  long  1 
— Dorit  stay  long  ! 

EH. 

De  shadders,  dey  er  creepin'  todes  de  top  er  de  hill, 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantin' ; 
But  night  don't  'stroy  w'at  de  day  done  buil', 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantin* ; 
'Less  de  noddin'  er  de  nigger  give  de  ash-cake  a 
chill  — 

Dat  sun  's  a-slantin* ; 
Dat  sun  's  a-slantin*  en  slippin'  down  still ! 
Den  sing  it  out,  Primus !  des  holler  en  bawl, 
En  w'ilst  we  er  strippin'  deze  mules  fer  de  stall, 
Let  de  gals  ketch  de  soun*  er  de  plantashun  call ; 
Ohy  it's  good-night  ladies!  my  love  unteryou  all! 
—  Ladies  !  my  love  unter  you  all ! 
—  My  love  unter  you  all! 


A  SONG  OF  THE  MOLE.  195 

II. 

A  SONG  OP  THE  MOLE. 

(Putnam  County,  Georgia.    1862.) 

De  jay-bird  hunt  de  sparrer-nes', 

De  bee-martin  sail  all  'roun', 
De  squir'l,  he  holler  f um  de  top  er  de  tree, 

Mr.  Mole,  he  stay  in  de  groun' ; 
He  hide  en  he  stay  twel  de  dark  drap  down ; 

Mr.  Mole,  he  stay  in  de  groun'. 

De  w'ipperwill  holler  fum  'cross  de  fence ; 

He  got  no  peace  er  min' ; 
Mr.  Mole,  he  grabble  en  he  dig  twel  he  Ian* 

Un'need 1  de  sweet-tater  vine ; 
He  Ian'  down  dar  whar  no  sun  ain't  shine, 

Un'need  de  sweet-tater  vine. 

De  sparrer-hawk  whet  his  bill  on  de  rail ; 

Oh,  ladies,  lissen  unter  me ! 
Mr.  Mole,  he  handle  his  two  little  spade, 

Down  dar  whar  no  eye  kin  see. 
He  dig  so  fur  en  he  dig  so  free, 

Down  dar  whar  no  eye  kin  see. 

De  nigger,  he  wuk  twel  de  dark  drap  down, 
En  den  Mr.  Mole  is  he ; 

1  Underneath. 


196  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

He  sing  his  song  de  whole  night  long, 
Whar  de  patter-roller *  never  kin  see  5 

He  sing  en  he  play  —  oh,  gals,  go  'way ! 
Whar  de  patter«roller  never  kin  see. 


III. 

"OH,   GIMME  DE  GAL  ! " 
I. 

De  boss,  he  squall  ter  de  rompuV  boys : 
Don't  bodder  dat  jug  in  de  spring  ! 

De  jug,  he  guggle  out  good-good-good  ! 
Nigger,  he  holler  en  sing: 

Oh,  gimme  de  gal,  de  big  greasy  gal, 
Wat  wrop  up  'er  ha'r  wid  a  string/ 

II. 
Little  bird  flutter  w'en  de  big  speckle  hawk 

Sail  up  en  light  in  de  pine  ; 
Wen  de  overseer  come  en  look  thoo  de  fence, 

Nigger  don't  cut  no  shine, 
But  he  roll  up  he  eye,  en  he  break  loose  en  sing : 

En  I  wish  dat  big  gal  'uz  mine  I 

m. 
Oh,  de  speckle  hawk  light  in  de  top  er  de  pine, 

En  dar  he  set  en  swing ; 
De  overseer  lean  his  chin  on  de  fence, 
And  lissen  at  de  cotton-choppers  sing ; 
1  Patrol. 


r 


1 


4 


M     \ 


CHRISTMAS  DANCE  SONG.  197 

Don't  nobody  bodder  dot  sway-back  gal 
Wat  wrop  up  'er  hd'r  wid  a  string  ! 

IV. 

Oh,  de  strappin'  black  gal,  de  big  greasy  gal ! 

She  kyar  herself  mighty  fine  ! 
How  de  boys  gwineter  f oiler  along  in  de  row, 

A-waitin'  fer  ter  ketch  her  sign  t 
De  boss  mighty  close,  yit  I  study  en  I  wish  — 

En  I  wish  dat  big  gal  yuz  mine  ! 


IV. 

CHRISTMAS   DANCE   SONG. 

[This  song  is  sung  with  what  Uncle  Remus  would  call  the 
"knee  racket;"  that  is  to  say,  it  is  a  "patting"  song.  If 
the  reader  will  bear  in  mind  that  the  rhythmical  effect  is 
based  on  time  —  or  recurring  and  invariable  pauses  —  there 
will  be  no  difficulty  in  catching  the  swing. 

Rabbit  foot  quick,  Rabbit  foot  light, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 

Hop,  skip,  jump !     Oh,  mon,  lie  's  a  sight ! 
Kaze  he  res'  all  de  day  en  run  all  de  night, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap, 
Oh,  Rabbit-tum-a-hash ! 

Crow  fly  eas',  de  crow  fly  wes', 
- —  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 
Jay-bird  hunt  de  sparrer  nes', 
En  he  eat  all  de  aigs  fer  ter  see  w'ich  de  bes', 


198  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap, 
Oh,  Rabbit-tum-a-hash ! 

Little  pot  simmer,  big  pot  bubble, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 
Dumplin'  flirt  like  he  done  got  in  trouble, 
He  flirt  en  he  flip  twel  he  look  like  he  double, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap, 
Oh,  Rabbit-tum-a-hash ! 

Pot,  he  bigger  dan  de  fryin'  pan, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 

En  'pun  dis  groun'  I  take  my  stan', 

I  druther  be  a  nigger  dan  a  po'  w'ite  man, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 
Oh,  Rabbit-tum-a-hash ! 

Nigger,  he  chunk  up  de  fire  en  grin, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 

Oh,  do  run  yer,  Miss  Sooky  Blueskin, 
You  ferget  fer  ter  put  dat  seas'nin'  in, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 
Oh,  Rabbit-tum-a-hash! 

Wen  Pa'tridge  call  —  "  Bob  White,  Bob  White ! " 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 

"  Does  yo'  dogs  bite  ?  "     "  Oh,  yes,  at  night ! " 
Oh,  den,  Mister  Rabbit  lif '  he  foot  mighty  light, 

—  Tum-a-hash,  tum-a-heap ! 
Oh,  Rabbit-tum-a-hash ! 


"  DEM  LAMS  A-CR YIN'  1 "  199 

V. 

"DEM  LAM'S   A-CRYIN'!" 

Ain't  you  year  dem  Lam's  a-cryin'  ? 

Cryin,'  cryin',  cry  no  mo' ! 
Lam's  a-shoutin',  Lam's  a-cryin', 

Cryin',  cryin',  on  de  udder  sho' ! 

One  fer  Paul  en  one  fer  Silas, 

En  one  fer  ter  make  my  heart  rejoice ! 

Don't  you  year  dem  Lam's  a-cryin'  ? 
O  dat  Saviour  blessid  voice ! 

Don't  you  year  dem  Lam's  a-cryin'  ? 

Satan  crawl  en  Satan  creep ; 
Lam's  a-shoutin',  Lam's  a-cryin', 

O  Good  Shepherd,  feed  my  sheep ! 

He  kin  stop  dem  Lam's  fum  cryin', 

He  kin  make  dis  heart  rejoice ; 
No  mo'  callin',  no  mo'  cryin', 

Wen  my  dear  soul  shill  git  hit's  choice  I 

Jesus  watch  w'iles  you  been  weepin' ; 

"Weepin',  weepin',  weep,  soul,  weep ! 
All  his  talkin'  soun'  like  singin'  — 

O  Good  Shepherd,  feed  my  sheep ! 


200  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

One  fer  Paul  en  one  fer  Silas, 

En  one  fer  ter  make  my  heart  rejoice ! 

Don't  you  year  dem  Lam's  a-cryin'  ? 
O  dat  Saviour  blessid  voice ! 


VI. 

"RUN,   NIGGER,   RUN!" 

Do,  please,  marster,  don't  ketch  me, 
Ketch  dat  nigger  behime  dat  tree ; 
He  stole  money  en  I  stole  none, 
Put  him  in  de  calaboose  des  for  fun ! 
Oh,  run,  nigger,  run  !  de  patter-roller  ketch  you- 
Hun,  nigger,  run  !     Hit 's  almos'  day  1 

Some  folks  say  dat  nigger  won't  steal, 
But  I  kotch  one  in  my  corn-fiel' ; 
He  run  ter  de  eas',  he  run  ter  de  wes', 
He  run  he  head  in  a  hornet's  nes' ! 
Oh,  run,  nigger,  run  1  de  patter-roller  ketch  you  ■ 
Hun,  nigger,  run  !    Hit 's  almos*  day  1 

My  ole  Miss,  she  prommus  me 
Dat  w'en  she  die,  she  set  me  free ; 
But  she  done  dead  dis  many  year  ago, 
En  yer  I  'm  a-hoein'  de  same  ole  row ! 
Oh,  run,  nigger,  run  !  de  patter-roller  ketch  you  • 
Run,  nigger,  run  !    Hit 's  almos'  day  I 


CORN-SHUCKING  SONG.  201 

I  'm  a-hoein'  across,  I  'm  a-hoein'  aroun', 
I  'in  a-cleanin'  up  some  mo'  new  groun', 
Whar  I  lif '  so  hard,  I  lif '  so  free, 
Dat  my  sins  rises  up  in  f  ronter  me ! 
Oh,  run,  nigger,  run  !  de  patter-roller  ketch  you  -— 
Run  nigger,  run  1    Hit 's  almos'  day  ! 

But  some  er  dese  days  my  time  will  come, 
I  '11  year  dat  bugle,  I  '11  year  dat  drum, 
I  '11  see  dem  armies  a-marchin'  along, 
I  '11  lif  my  head  en  jine  der  song  — 
I  '11  hide  no  mo'  behime  dat  tree, 
Wen  de  angels  flock  fer  ter  wait  on  me ! 
Oh,  run,  nigger,  run  !  de  'patter-roller  ketch  you  — 
Run,  nigger,  run  !    Hit  fs  almos>  day  I 


VII. 

CORN-SHUCKING  SONG. 

[A  rail  was  placed  in  the  middle  of  the  compile,  at  the  bot- 
tom. The  shuckers  were  divided  into  two  competing  gangs, 
and  there  was  a  rivalry  as  to  which  side  should  reach  the  rail 
first.    Hence  the  song.] 

Hit  's  a  mighty  dry  year  w'en  de  crab-grass  fail, 

Oh,  row,  row,  row !  who  laid  dat  rail  ? 
Hit 's  a  mighty  dark  night  w'en  de  nigger  tu'n  pale, 
De  big-foot  nigger  dat  laid  dat  rail ! 

Oh,  row,  row,  row  !  who  laid  dat  rail  t 
Hinktum,  ranktum,  laid  dat  rail ! 


202  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

Show  me  de  nigger  dat  laid  dot  rail, 
Oh,  row,  row,  row  !  who  laid  dot  rail  t 

Wen  nigger  git  los',  hit 's  de  same  ole  tale, 

Oh,  row,  row,  row !  who  laid  dat  rail? 
Ten  mile  ter  de  church,  one  mile  ter  de  jail, 
Oh,  show  me  de  nigger  dat  laid  dat  rail ! 
Big-foot  nigger  dat  laid  dat  rail ! 
Oh,  row,  row,  row  !  who  laid  dat  rail  f 
Rinhtum,  ranhtum,  laid  dat  rail ! 

Wen  niggers  fuss,  de  w'ite  folks  frail, 

Oh,  row,  row,  row !  who  laid  dat  rail  ? 
We  er  gittin'  dar  now,  don't  tell  no  tale, 

Show  me  de  nigger  dat  laid  dat  rail ! 
I  '11  stick  he  head  in  a  big  tin  pail, 

Oh,  tu'n  me  aloose !  lemme  tetch  dat  rail ! 
Oh,  row,  row,  row  !  who  laid  dot  rail  ? 
Big-foot  nigger  dat  laid  dat  rail ! 
Oh,  show  me  de  nigger  dat  laid  dat  rail9 
Rinhtum,  ranhtum,  laid  dat  rail  I 

VIII. 

oh,  july!  dis  long  time! 
(Putnam  County,  Georgia.   1858.) 

Mr.  Coon,  Mr.  Coon,  he  rack  mighty  fas', 
Mr.  Coon,  Mr.  Coon,  he  slip  f roo  de  grass  — 
En  yit  Mr.  Coon  gits  cotch  at  las' ! 


Ofl,  JULY  I  DIS  LONG  TIME!  203 

Oh,  July !     Dis  long  time ! 
Dis  long  time  !     Oh,  July ! 
Oh,  July  !     Dis  strong  time ! 
Dis  strong  time !     Oh,  July ! l 

Mr.  Rabbit,  Mr.  Rabbit,  he  run  en  squot, 
He  lif '  he  foot  lak  de  groun'  mighty  hot  — 
En  yit  Mr.  Rabbit  lan's  safe  in  de  pot ! 

Oh,  July !     Dis  strong  time ! 

Dis  strong  time !     Oh,  July ! 

Oh,  July !     Mighty  long  time ! 

Mighty  long  time !     Oh,  July ! 

Mr.  Fox,  Mr.  Fox,  he  git  over  groun', 
He  run  cross-ways  en  he  run  all  'roun'  — • 
En  yit  Mr.  Fox  will  be  run  down ! 

Oh,  July !     Dis  long  time ! 

Dis  long  time !     Oh,  July ! 

Oh,  July !     Dis  wrong  time ! 

Dis  wrong  time !     Oh,  July ! 

Mr.  Mink,  Mr.  Mink,  he  slicker  dan  sin, 
He  make  'im  a  hole  en  den  he  slip  in  — 
En  yit  Mr.  Mink  will  lose  he  skin  ! 

Oh,  July  !     Mighty  wrong  time ! 

Mighty  wrong  time !     Oh,  July ! 

Oh,  July !     Mighty  long  time ! 

Mighty  long  time !     Oh,  July ! 

1  This  refrain  chorus  belongs  to  a  dozen  different  songs. 
Its  meaning  must  be  taken  literally.  July  is  a  long  time,  a 
hot  time,  and  a  strong  time  to  those  who  work  in  the  sun. 


204  BIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

IX. 

WALK-A  CHALK. 
(In  and  around  Sapelo,  Georgia  Coast.) 

'E  walk-a  chalk,  da  honkry  man, 
'E  eat  urn  rice,  'e  sop  um  pan ; 
'E  sop  um  pan,  'e  lick  um  dry, 
'E  smack  'e  mout',  'e  roll  'e  y-eye : 
Ki!    Walk-a  chalk! 

Da  honkry  man,  'e  walk-a  chalk, 
'E  mout'  so  full  'e  no  kin  talk, 
'E  shed  'e  y-eye,  'e  wuk  um  jaw, 
'E  no  kin  talk,  'e  chaw  um  chaw : 
Hi!    Walk-a  chalk! 

'E  wipe  'e  mout',  'e  shed  'e  y-eye, 
'E  'tretch  um  out,  lak  gwan  fer  die, 
'E  flup  'e  head  smack  in  da  pan, 
'E  dream  'e  yerry  da  buckra-man !  * 
'E  walk-a  chalk! 

X. 

"COME  ALONG,  TRUE  BELIEVER !" 

Come  along,  true  believer,  come  along : 
De  time  is  a  rollin'  'roun', 

1  White  man  ;  boss  ;  overseer. 


"COME  ALONG,   TRUE  BELIEVER  !  "        205 

Wen  clem  w'at  stan's  a-haltin'  by  de  way 

Won't  w'ar  no  glory  crown  ! 
Oh,  de  sun  shine  white,  de  sun  shine  bright  — 

Year  de  news  w'at  de  spirit  tells  : 

De  angels  say  dere  's  nothin'  fer  to  do 

But  ter  ring  dem  charmin'  bells  ! 

Almos'  home  !  almos'  home  ! 

We  faints  and  falls  by  spells : 
Angels  say  ain't  nothin'  fer  to  do 
But  ter  ring  dem  charmin'  bells ! 

Come  along,  true  believer,  come  along ! 

De  way  is  open  wide  : 
No  use  for  sinners  to  be  stum'lin'  'roun' 

A-huntin'  for  de  hev'mly  guide ! 
Oh,  saints,  slip  thro' !     Oh,  sinners,  come  too  I 

En  a-year  w'at  my  Lord  tells : 
De  angels  say  dere  's  nothin'  fer  to  do 
But  ter  ring  dem  charmin'  bells ! 

Almos'  home  !  almos'  home  ! 

We  faints  and  falls  by  spells : 
Angels  say  ain't  nothin'  fer  ter  do 
But  ter  ring  dem  charmin'  bells ! 

Come  along,  true  believer,  come  along, 

En  walk  in  de  hev'mly  way  ! 
I  rastle  wid  Jacob  all  night  —  all  night  — 

I  rastle  wid  Jacob  all  day  ! 
My  cross  is  heavy,  and  it 's  O  my  Lord ! 

En  I  year  w'at  de  spirit  tells  : 


206  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

De  angels  say  dere  's  nothin'  fer  ter  do 
But  ter  ring  dem  charmin'  bells  ! 

Almos'  home  !  almos'  home ! 

We  faints  and  falls  by  spells ! 
Angels  say  ain't  nothin'  fer  to  do 
But  ter  ring  dem  charmin'  bells  I 

XL 

A  NEGRO   LOVE   SONG. 

Track  in  de  paff  whar  rabbit  bin  play'n', 

(Hey,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 
Han'  me  down  my  walkin'-cane, 

(Hi,  my  Lily  !  go  down  de  road  !) 
Hey,  my  Lily  !  de  cow  done  lowed, 

(Go  down  de  road !  —  go  down  de  road  !) 
Hit 's  wet  on  de  grass  whar  de  jew  bin  po'd, 

(Hi,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 

Mighty  long  way  froo  de  narrer  lane, 

(Hey,  my  Lily  !  go  down  de  road  !) 
En  kildee  holler  like  he  callin'  up  rain, 

(Hi,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road  !) 
Hey,  my  Lily !  de  chicken  done  crowed, 

(Go  down  de  road !  —  go  down  de  road !) 
Sun  gone  down  en  moon  done  showed, 

(My  Lily,  my  Lily  !  go  down  de  road !) 

Han'  me  down  my  walkin'-cane, 
(Hey,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 


"DE  OL'  SHEEP  SHARP.  207 

Big  owl  holler  :    No  use  stay'n', 
(Hi,  my  Lily  !  go  down  de  road !) 

Big  nigger  tote  de  little  gal  load, 

(Go  down  de  road !  —  go  down  de  road !) 

Kase  too  big  a  turn  make  nigger  leg  bowed, 
(My  Lily,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 

Han'  me  down  my  walkin'-cane, 

(Hey,  my  Lily  !  go  down  de  road !) 
De  boys  all  sing,  an'  keep  on  say'n' ; 

(Hi,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 
Nigger  will  drink  fum  'n'er  nigger's  go'd, 

(Go  down  de  road  !  —  go  down  de  road !) 
En  some  folks  git  w'at  dey  ain't  never  growed, 

(My  Lily,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 

One  man  lose  w'at  'n'er  man  gain, 
(Hey,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 

You  git  yo'  shawl  en  han'  my  cane, 
(Hey,  my  Lily !  go  down  de  road !) 

XII. 


Oh,  de  ole  Sheep  sharp  w'en  he  shell  dat  corn, 
(Come  along  !  come  along  !) 

He  shell  dat  corn  by  de  rattle  er  his  horn, 
(Oh,  do  come  along !) 

But  he  wan't  so  sharp  when  he  sont  it  ter  mill, 
(Come  along !  come  along !) 


2(fS  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

Kase  he  sont  it  ter  mill  by  de  Whipperwill, 
(Oh,  do  come  along  \) 

He  sont  it  ter  mill  by  de  Whipperwill, 

(Come  along !  come  along !) 
W'ich  he  drap  de  bag,  en  let  it  spill, 

(Oh,  do  come  along  !) 
En  w'atter  you  reckon  he  did  declar', 

(Come  along !  come  along !) 
Wen  de  folks  pass  by,  en  fine  'im  dar  ? 

(Oh,  do  come  along !) 

De  day  done  gone,  en  de  night  ain't  long, 

(Do  come  along  /) 
Oh,  ladies  all,  I  mus1  sing  my  song, 

(Do  come  along  /) 

Mr.  'Possum,  he  clam  de  'simmon  tree, 

(Come  along,  come  along !) 
En  he  wink  he  eye,  en  grin  at  me, 

(Oh,  do  come  along !) 
I  up  wid  a  rock,  en  let  'er  fly, 

(Come  along !  come  along !) 
Kerblip  !  I  tuck  'im  in  de  eye, 

(Oh,  do  come  along !) 

De  day  done  gone,  en  de  night  ainH  longf 

(Do  come  along  /) 
Oh,  ladies  all,  Imus'  sing  my  song9 

(Do  come  along  /) 


"DE  OV  SHEEP  SHAMP."  209 

Ole  Marster  say  he  never  is  see, 

(Come  along  !   come  along !) 
No  'possum  half  ez  fat  ez  he, 

(Oh,  do  come  along !) 
Dey  flinged  away  de  head  en  de  feet, 

(Come  along !  come  along !) 
En  den  had  'nuff  fer  all  ter  eat, 

(Oh,  do  come  along !) 

De  day  done  gone,  en  de  night  ain't  long, 

{Do  come  along  /) 
Oh,  ladies  all,  I  mils'  sing  my  song, 

{Do  come  along  /) 

Dey  tuck  'im  down  ter  Polly  Bell, 

(Come  along !  come  along !) 
Bekaze  dey  know  she  cook  'im  well, 

(Oh,  do  come  along  !) 
She  made  a  pie,  en  she  made  a  stew, 

(Come  along !  come  along !) 
A  roas'  en  a  fry,  en  a  bobbycue, 

(Oh,  do  come  along !) 

De  day  done  gone,  en  de  night  ainH  long, 

{Do  come  along  /) 
Oh,  ladies  all,  Imus'  sing  my  song, 

{Do  come  along  /) 


210  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS, 


XIII. 


Oh,  sinner !  don't  take  yo'  time, 
Dar  's  a  road  we  all  mus'  clime  — 
Hit 's  a  road  full  er  f  aintin'  spells : 
De  way  mighty  long, 
But  soul  get  strong 
When  she  year  dem  charmin'  bells. 
Oh,  sing,  my  soul ! 
Oh,  ring  en  roll ! 
Ring-a  dem  charmin'  bells ! 

De  road  mighty  full  er  dus', 
But  sinner  kin  quench  his  thus', 
By  drinkin'  f  um  de  Jacob  wells : 
En  de  soul  git  strong 
Wen  she  year  dat  song  — 
Oh,  ring  dem  charmin'  bells ! 
Oh,  Jerdun  roll ! 
Oh,  sing,  my  soul ! 
Ring-a  dem  charmin'  bells  I 

Oh,  sufferin'  sinner,  rise  — 
Lif  up  dem  'umbel  eyes  — 
Lissen  w'at  de  Speret  tells : 

Oh,  do  git  strong 

En  sing  dat  song  — 


RING  DEM  CHARMIN'  BELLS.  211 

I  year  dem  charmin'  bells. 

Oh,  sing,  my  soul ! 

Oh,  ring  en  roll ! 
Ring-a  dem  charmin'  bells ! 

Wen  de  night  git  dark  en  coP, 
En  you  year  dat  Jerdun  roll, 

Dat  de  place  whar  John  befells;1 
Oh,  soul,  git  strong, 
En  sing  dat  song  — 
Oh,  ring  dem  charmin'  bells ! 
Oh,  sing,  my  soul ! 
Oh,  ring  en  roll ! 
Ring-a  dem  charmin'  bells  I 

My  Lord,  he  done  onroll, 
Dat  shinin'  clof  uv  gol', 

En  de  heav'ms  dey  sinks  en  swells, 
Oh,  soul,  sing  strong ! 
Des  shout  dat  song  — 
Oh,  ring  dem  charmin'  bells ! 
Oh,  sing,  my  soul ! 
Oh,  ring  en  roll ! 
Ring-a  dem  charmin'  bells ! 

*  In  other  words,  this  is  what  befell  St.  John.  It  may  be 
well  to  state  in  this  connection  that  this  attempt  to  render  the 
spirit  of  a  very  quaint  song  should  not  be  confounded  with 
'*  Roll,  Jordan,  Roll,"  the  music  of  which  has  been  preserved 
with  wonderful  success  by  the  late  Mrs.  Lucy  McKim  Garri- 
son, nor  with  another  song  with  the  same  refrain.  The  roll- 
ing of  the  Jordan  and  the  ringing  of  the  charming  bells  are 
heard  in  a  dozen  negro  songs. 


212  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

XIV. 

hog-feeder's  song. 

Oh,  rise  up,  my  ladies !     Lissen  unter  me ! 
Gwoop  1     Gwoop  ! 1     Gee-whoop  1     Goo-whee  I 
I  'm  a-gwine  dis  night  f  er  ter  knock  along  er  you ! 
Gwoop  !     Gwoop !     Gee-whoop !     Goo-whoo ! 
Pig-goo  !    Pig-gee  1     Gee-oo-whee  1 

Oh,  de  stars  look  bright,  des  like  dey  gwinter  fall, 
En  way  todes  sundown  you  hear  de  Kildee  call  ,• 
Stee-wee  1    Killdee  !     Pig-goo !    Pig-gee  1 
Pig  !    Pig  1    Pig-goo  1    Pig  1   Pig  1  Pig-gee  I 

De  blue  barrer  squeal  kaze  he  can't  squeeze  thoo, 
En  he  hump  up  his  back  des  like  niggers  do ! 
Oh,  humpty-umpty  blue  !     Pig-gee  1     Pig-goo  ! 
Pig!    Pig!    Pig-gee!    Pig!  Pig!  Pig-goo! 

Oh,  rise  up,  my  ladies !     Lissen  unter  me ! 
Gwoop  !     Gwoo-pee  !     Gee-whoop  !     Goo-whee  ! 
I  'm  a-gwine  dis  night  a-gallantin'  out  wid  you ! 
Gwoop  !    Gwoo-pee  !     Gee-whoop  !     Goo-whoo ! 
Pig-goo  !    Pig-gee  !    Gee-oo-whee  ! 

Ole  sow  got  sense  des  ez  sho  ez  you  er  born, 
Kaze  she  take'n  hunch  de  basket  f er  ter  shatter  out 
corn! 

1  G  hard  here  and  throughout. 


i 


NURSERY  SONG.  213 

Ma'm,  you  make  too  free !     Pig-goo  !    Pig-gee  ! 
Pig  !  Pig  !    Pig-goo  !  Pig  !  Pig  !  Pig-gee ! 

When  de  pig  git  fat,  he  better  stay  close, 
Kaze  fat  pig  nice  fer  ter  hide  out  en  roas' ! 
En  he  tas'e  mighty  good  in  de  barbecue ! 
Oh,  roas'  pig,  shoo  !     'N-yum  !  dat  barbecue ! 
Pig  !  Pig  1   Pig-gee  !    Pig  !    Pig  1    Pig-goo  ! 

Oh,  rise  up,  my  ladies !     Lissen  unter  me  ! 
Gwoop  !    Gwoo-pee !    Gee-whoop !    Goo-whee ! 
I  'm  a-gwine  dis  night  fer  ter  knock  aroun'  wid  you ! 
Gwoop!    Goo-pee!    Gee-whoop!    Goo-whoo! 
Pig-goo  !    Pig-gee  !    Gee-oo-whee  ! 


XV. 

NURSERY  SONG. 

Mammy  went  away  —  she  toF  me  ter  stay, 

An'  take  good  keer  er  de  baby, 
She  toF  me  ter  stay  an'  sing  dis  away : 

Oh,  go  ter  sleepy,  little  baby ! 

Chorus, 

Oh,  go  ter  sleep !     Sleepy,  little  babe, 
Oh,  go  ter  sleepy,  little  baby, 

Kaze  when  you  wake,  you  '11  git  some  cake, 
An'  ride  a  little  white  horsey ! 


214  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

Oh,  de  little  Butterfly,  he  stole  some  pie  — 

Go  ter  sleepy,  little  baby ! 
An'  he  flew'd  so  high,  twel  he  put  out  his  eye  - 

Oh,  go  ter  sleepy,  little  baby ! 
Chorus. 

Oh,  shet  yo'  eye,  an  don't  you  cry  — 

Go  ter  sleepy,  little  baby ! 
Kaze  mammy  's  boun'  f  er  ter  come  bimeby  — 

Oh,  go  ter  sleepy,  little  baby ! 
Chorus. 

We  '11  stop  up  de  cracks  and  sow  up  de  seams 
De  Booger  Man  never  shill  ketch  you ! 

Oh,  go  ter  sleep  and  dream  sweet  dreams  — 
De  Booger  Man  never  shill  ketch  you ! 
Chorus. 

You  shill  hear  dem  silver  bells  ring  — 

Bye-oh,  sweet  little  baby ! 
You  shill  hear  sweet  angels  sing  — 

Oh,  go  ter  sleepy,  little  baby ! 
Chorus, 

De  river  run  wide,  de  river  run  deep  — 

Oh,  bye-oh,  sweet  little  baby ! 
De  boat  rock  slow  —  shill  rock  you  ter  sleep  — 

Oh,  bye-oh,  sweet  little  baby ! 
Chorus. 


MY  HONEY,  MY  LOVE.  215 

XVI. 
MY  HONEY,   MY  LOVE. 

Hit  's  a  mighty  fur  ways  up  de  Far*  well  Lane, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
You  may  ax   Mister  Crow,  you  may  ax  Mister 
Crane, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
Dey  '11  make  you  a  bow,  en  dey  '11  tell  you  de 
same, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
Hit 's  a  mighty  fur  ways  fer  ter  go  in  de  night, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
My  honey,  my  love,  my  heart's  delight  — 

My  honey,  my  love  t 

Mister  Mink,  he  creeps  twel  he  wake  up  de  snipe, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
Mister  Bull-Frog  holler,  Come  alight  my  pipe ! 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
En  de  Pa'tridge  ax,  Ain't  yo'  peas  ripe  ? 

My  honey,  my  love  ! 
Better  not  walk  erlong  dar  much  atter  night, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
My  honey,  my  love,  my  heart's  delight  — 

My  honey,  my  love  1 

De  Bully-Bat  fly  mighty  close  ter  de  groun', 
My  honey,  my  love ! 


216  HIS  SONGS  AND  BALLADS. 

Mister  Fox,  he  coax  'er,  Do  come  down ! 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
Mister  Coon,  he  rack  all  'roun'  en  'roun', 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
In  de  darkes'  night,  oh,  de  nigger,  he 's  a  sight ! 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
My  honey,  my  love,  my  heart's  delight  — 

My  honey,  my  love  ! 

Oh,  flee,  Miss  Nancy,  flee  ter  my  knee, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
'Lev'm  big,  fat  coons  liv'  in  one  tree, 

My  honey,  my  love. 
Oh,  ladies  all,  won't  you  marry  me  ? 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
Tu'n  lef ',  tu'n  right,  we  '11  dance  all  night, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
My  honey,  my  love,  my  heart's  delight  — 

My  honey,  my  love  ! 

De  big  Owl  holler  en  cry  fer  his  mate, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
Oh,  don't  stay  long !     Oh,  don't  stay  late ! 

My  honey,  my  love. 
Hit  ain't  so  mighty  fur  ter  de  Good-by  Gate, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
Whar  we  all  got  ter  go  w'en  we  sing  out  de  night, 

My  honey,  my  love ! 
My  honey,  my  love,  my  heart's  delight  — 

My  honey,  my  love  ! 


HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 


HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 


UNCLE  REMUS  AT  THE  TELEPHONE. 

One  night  recently,  as  Uncle  Remus' s  Miss 
Sally  was  sitting  by  the  fire  sewing  and  sing- 
ing softly  to  herself,  she  heard  the  old  man 
come  into  the  back  yard  and  enter  the  dining- 
room,  where  a  bright  fire  was  still  burning  in 
the  grate.  Everything  had  been  cleared  away. 
The  cook  had  gone  and  the  house  girl  had  dis- 
appeared, and  the  little  boy  was  asleep.  Uncle 
Remus  had  many  privileges  in  the  house  of 
the  daughter  of  his  old  mistress  and  master, 
and  one  of  these  was  to  warm  himself  by  the 
dining-room  fire  whenever  he  felt  lonely,  es- 
pecially at  night.  To  the  lady  there  was  a 
whimsical  suggestion  of  pathos  in  everything 
the  old  negro  said  and  did ;  and  yet  her  atti- 
tude toward  Uncle  Remus  was  one  of  bustling 


220  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

criticism  and  depreciation.  By  leaning  back 
in  her  chair  a  little,  she  could  see  him  as  he 
sat  before  the  fire  enjoying  the  warmth. 

"  I  should  think  it  was  time  for  you  to'  be 
in  bed/'  she  exclaimed. 

"  No'm,  't  ain't,"  responded  Uncle  Kemus. 
"  I  year  tell  dat  w'en  ole  folks  git  ter  bed 
soon,  dey  feelin's  bin  hurted;  en  goodness 
knows  dey  ain't  nobody  hurted  my  feelin's  dis 


"  Well,  there  is  n't  anything  in  there  that 
you  can  pick  up.  I  've  had  everything  put 
under  lock  and  key." 

"Yessum  dey  is  sump'n  n'er  in  yer,  too, 
kaze  yer  Mars  John  supper  settin'  right  down 
yer  'fo'  de  fier,  en  little  mo'  hit  'ud  a  bin  dry 
spang  up,  if  I  had  n't  'a'  drapt  in  des  w'en 
I  did.  I  year  Mars  John  tell  dat  ar  nigger 
'oman  w'at  you  call  yo'  cook  fer  ter  have 
'im  some  fried  aigs  fur  supper,  en  ef  deze  ain't 
fried  en  dried  I  ain't  never  see  none  w'at  is. 
W'en  Mars  John  come,  you  kin  set  plum'  in 
dar  en  year  'im  crack  um  up  in  his  mouf,  same 
lak  cow  chawin'  fodder.  Las'  Sat'd'y  night 
Mars  John  fotch  some  fried  isters  home,  en  ef 
dish  yer  nigger  'oman  stay  on  dis  hill  many 
mo'  days,  he  ull  git  all  his  vittles  cooked  down 


UNCLE  REMUS  AT  THE  TELEPHONE.       221 

town  en  fetch  it  home  in  a  baskit.  Whai 
Mars  John  now  ?  " 

Just  then  there  was  a  call  at  the  telephone. 
The  little  gong  rattled  away  like  a  house  oil 
fire.  As  the  lady  went  to  answer  it,  Uncle 
Remus  rose  from  his  chair  and  crept  on  his 
tip-toes  to  the  door  that  opened  into  the  sitting- 
room.     He  heard  his  Miss  Sally  talking. 

"Well,  what's  wanted?  .  .  .  Oh  — is  that 
you  ?  Well,  I  could  n't  imagine  .  .  .  No  .  .  . 
Fast  asleep  too  long  ago  to  talk  about  .  .  . 
Why  of  course  !  No  !  .  .  .  Why  should  I  be 
frightened !  .  .  .  I  declare  !  you  ought  to  be 
ashamed  .  .  .  Remus  is  here  .  .  .  Two  hours ! 
I  think  you  are  horrid  mean  !  .  - .  .  By-by  !  " 

Uncle  Remus  stood  looking  suspiciously  at 
the  telephone  after  his  Miss  Sally  had  turned 
away. 

"  Miss  Sally,"  he  said  presently,  "  wuz  you 
talkin  ter  Mars  John  ?  " 

"  Certainly.    Who  did  you  suppose  it  was  ?  " 

"  Wharbouts  wuz  Mars  John  ?  " 

"  At  his  office." 

"  Way  down  yan  on  Yallerbamer  Street  ?  '* 

"Yes." 

At  this  piece  of  information,  Urcle  Remus 
emitted  a  groan  that  was  full  of  uoubt  and 


222  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

pity,  and  went  into  the  dining-room.  His 
Miss  Sally  laughed,  and  then  an  idea  seemed 
to  strike  her.  She  called  him  back,  and  went 
again  to  the  telephone. 

"  Is  that  you,  Central !  .  .  .  Please  connect 
eleven-forty  with  fourteen-sixty."  There  was 
a  fluttering  sound  in  the  instrument,  and  then 
the  lady  said :  "  Yes,  it 's  me  !  .  .  .  Here 's  Re- 
mus. .  .  .  Yes,  but  he  wants  to  talk  to  you." 

"  Here,  Remus,  take  this  and  put  it  to  your 
ear.  Here,  simpleton  !  It  won't  hurt  you." 
mm  Uncle  Remus  took  the  ear-piece  and  handled 
it  as  though  it  had  been  a  loaded  pistol.  He 
tried  to  look  in  at  both  ends,  and  then  he 
placed  it  to  his  ear,  and  grinned  sheepishly. 
He  heard  a  thin,  sepulchral,  but  familiar  voice 
calling  out,  "  Hello,  Remus !  "  and  his  sheep- 
ish grin  gave  place  to  an  expression  of  uneasy 
astonishment. 

"  Hello,  Remus  !  Hello-ello-ello-ello-o-o  !  " 

"  Is  dat  you,  Mars  John  ?  " 

"  Of  course  it  is,  you  bandy-legged  old  vil- 
lain. I  have  no  time  to  be  standing  here. 
What  do  you  want  ?  " 

"  How  in  de  name  er  God  you  git  in  dar, 
Mars  John?" 

"In  where?" 


UNCLE  REMUS  AT  THE  TELEPHONE.       223 

"  In  dish  yer  —  in  dish  yer  appleratus." 

"  Oh,  you  be  fiddle-stick  !  What  do  you 
want?" 

"  Mars  John,  kin  you  see  me  —  er  is  she  all 
dark  in  dar  ?  " 

"Are  you  crazy?  Where  is  your  Miss 
Sally?" 

"  She  in  yer,  hollun  en  laughin'.  Mars 
John,  how  you  gwine  git  out'n  dar  ?  " 

"Dry  up!     Good-night!" 

f^FYis,  Miss  Sally,"  said  Uncle  Remus, 
after  listening  a  moment.  "  Dey  's  a  mighty 
zoonin'  gwine  on  in  dar,  en  I  dunner  whe'er 
Mars  John  tryin'  ter  scramble  out,  er  whe'er 
he  des  tryin'  fer  ter  make  hisself  comfertuble 
in  dar." 
fe  "  What  did  he  say,  Remus  ?  " 

"  He  up  en  'low'd  dat  one  un  us  wuz  a  vil- 
yun,  but  dey  was  such  a  buzzin'  gwine  on  in 
dar  dat  I  could  n't  'zactly  ketch  de  rights  un 
it." 

Uncle  Remus  went  back  to  his  place  by  the 
dining-room  fire,  and  after  a  while  began  to 
mutter  and  talk  to  himself. 

"  What 's  the  matter  now  ?  "  his  Miss  Sally 
asked. 

"  I  'uz  des  a-sayin'  dat  I  know  Mars  John 
mus'  be  suffun  some'rs." 


224  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

"Why?" 

"  Oh,  I  des  knows  it ;  kaze'  ef  he  ain't,  wa't 
make  he  talk  so  weak  ?  He  bleedz  ter  be  in 
trouble.  I  'm  a-tellin'  you  de  Lord's  truf e  — 
dat  w'ite  man  talk  like  he  ain't  bigger  den  one 
er  deze  yer  little  teenchy  chany  dolls.  I  boun5 
you,"  he  continued,  "  ef  I  'uz  a  w'ite  'oman 
en  Mars  John  wuz  my  ole  man,  I  'd  snatch  up 
my  bonnet  en  I  'd  natally  sail  'roun'  dish  yer 
town  twel  I  fine  out  w'at  de  matter  wid  'im. 
I  would  dat." 

The  old  man's  Miss  Sally  laughed  until  the 
tears  came  in  her  eyes,  and  then  she  said  :  — 

"  There  's  a  piece  of  pie  on  the  sideboard. 
Do  get  it,  and  hush  so  much  talking." 

"  Thanky,  mistiss,  thanky  !  "  exclaimed 
Uncle  Remus,  shuffling  across  the  room.  He 
got  the  pie  and  returned  to  his  chair.  "  Dish 
yer  pie,"  he  continued,  holding  it  up  between 
his  eyes  and  the  fire  —  "  dish  yer  pie  come  in 
good  time,  kaze  Mars  John  talk  so  weak  en 
fur  off  it  make  me  feel  right  empty.  I  speck 
he  be  well  time  he  git  home,  en  ef  he  'uz  ter 
git  holt  er  dish  yer  pie,  hit  mought  make  'im 
have  bad  dreams." 

In  a  few  moments  the  pie  had  disappeared, 
and  when  his  Miss  Sally  looked  at  him  a  little 
later,  he  was  fast  asleep. 


II. 

UNCLE  REMUS  RECEIVES  A  VALENTINE. 

Uncle  Remus's  Miss  Sally  determined  that 
the  old  man  should  not  be  slighted  on  Valen- 
tine's day,  and  so  she  hunted  around  and  got 
a  comic  one  that  seemed  to  fit  the  case,  and 
put  in  it  a  large  envelope.  Upon  this  she 
pasted  a  number  of  old  postage  stamps,  and 
duly  addressed  it.  When  the  day  arrived, 
she  had  Uncle  Remus  called  from  his  work  in 
the  garden.     He  came  grumbling. 

"  When  yuther  folks  'roun'  yer  git  ter  eat- 
in'  der  sallid  en'  truck,  Mars  John  nee'nter 
come  axin'  me  w'at  gone  wid  our'n.  Kaze 
gyarden  truck  ain't  gwineter  grow  less'n  hit 's 
planted,  en  she  can't  be  planted  less'n  dey  's 
some  un  ter  put  'er  in  de  groun'.  I  ain't  md'n 
got  my  back  fit  ter  de  mattock  twel  yer  dey 
come  a-hollerin'  en  a-bawlin'.  Hit 's  Remus 
dis  en  Remus  dat,  en  'f o'  de  year  out  hit  '11 
be  Remus  kill  de  ole  black  cat." 

"What  has  the  cat  done,  now?"  asked  his 


226  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

Miss  Sally,  who  had  heard  only  a  part  of  the 
old  man's  growl. 

"  Nothin'  't  all,  Miss  Sally ;  she  ain't  done 
nothin'  'tall  ter  me,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  in 
another  tone  altogether.  "  Is  you  want  me, 
Miss  Sally  ?  Dat  slick-head  house  gal  squeal 
so  w'en  she  holler  dat  I  can't  tell  w'at  she 
say." 

"  Yes ;  here  is  a  big  letter  for  you.  I  expect 
it  is  a  valentine." 

Uncle  Remus  adjusted  his  spectacles,  took 
the  letter,  and  examined  it  carefully  on  both 
sides,  and  then  looked  curiously  at  the  super- 
scription. 

"  How  do  she  run,  Miss  Sally  ?  "  indicating 
the  address  with  his  forefinger. 

The  lady  read :  "  Remus  Misery,  Esq., 
West  End,  Atlanta,  Georgia :  At  Home." 

"  Ah-yi !  "  exclaimed  the  old  man,  his  eyes 
twinkling  humorously.  "  Dey  des  know'd  I 
wuz  one  er  de  at-home  niggers  —  dey  did 
dat.  Is  dey  got  de  'squire  on  dar  sho  nuff, 
Miss  Sally  ?  Some  folks  calls  Mars  John  kun- 
nul,  en  some  calls  'im  major,  en  some  calls  'im 
jedge;  but  dish  yer  'squire  business  is  bran 
new  ter  me.  W'at  'uz  de  yuther  name,  Miss 
Sally?" 


i 


UNCLE  BEMUS  RECEIVES  A  VALENTINE.    227 

"  Remus  Misery." 

"  How  de  name  er  goodness  does  dey  fine 
folks  out  dat  away  ?  De  man  w'at  writ  dat 
know  me  by  heart.  Let  'lone  dat,  I  'm  ole 
mizerbul  Miz'ry." 

Still  holding  the  letter,  Uncle  Remus  felt 
of  it  carefully,  pressing  every  part  of  it  be- 
tween his  thumb  and  forefinger. 

"What  are  you  feeling  of  it  for?"  ex- 
claimed his  Miss  Sally.  "  Why  don't  you  open 
it?" 

"  I  'm  too  ole  for  dat,  Miss  Sally,"  said 
Uncle  Remus.  "  Ef  I  feels  any  little  bunch 
er  sumpin'  n'er  in  yer,  den  I  '11  know  some  er 
deze  yer  yuther  niggers  bin  fixin'  up  der  cun- 
jerments  at  me,  en  I  '11  des  take'n  take  it 
'roun'  yan  en  bury  it  whar  Mars  John  p'inter 
made  his  bed  las'  night,  en  dat  '11  ondo  it." 

"  Well,  undoubtedly,  you  are  the  craziest 
old  loon  in  the  country." 

"  Yessum.  But  you  know'd  dat  nigger 
man  w'at  Ole  Miss  got  fum  Mars  Bill  Little 
endurin'  er  de  war,  kaze  he  could  tan  hides 
en  make  shoes  ?  Well,  dat  ve'y  nigger  man 
ain't  bin  on  our  place  mo  'n  a  week,  'f  o'  he 
fine  a  little  bunch  er  sump'n  layin'  on  de  top 
do' -step.     He  pick  'er  up,  he  did,  en  open  'er, 


228  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

en  dey  wan't  nothin'  in  dar  but  some  ha'r,  en 
some  frog  toes,  en  some  dry  roots.  He  take'n 
fling  it  down,  he  did,  en  go  long  'bout  his 
business,  en  dat  night  he  "uz  tuck  wid  a  misery 
in  de  side  er  de  head,  en  hiz  jaw  got  draw'd 
down,  en  look  lak  die  he  would  spite  er  all 
dey  kin  say  and  do.  Hit  went  on  dis  away 
twel  bimeby  ole  Affikin  Jack,  he  tuck'n  come 
up  fum  de  Albenny  place,  en  time  he  lay 
eyes  on  de  nigger,  Brer  Jack  low  he  'uz  cun- 
jud,  en  den  hit  come  out  dat  de  nigger  done 
gone  en  foun'  sump'n  on  de  do' -step.  Brer 
Jack  ax  'im  wharbouts  is  it,  en  de  nigger  'low 
he  dunno  ;  en  den  Brer  Jack  'low  he  boun' 
't  ain't  so  mighty  fur,  en  lo  en  beholes !  he 
tuck'n  pull  de  cunjerments  fum  und'  de  nigger 
bed  tick.  Dat  he  did,  kaze  I  seed  'im  wid  my 
own  eyes.  En  den  Brer  Jack  tuck'n  bury  it, 
he  did,  out  whar  de  dogs  make  der  bed,  en  he 
rub  de  nigger  head  wid  a  rabbit  foot;  en 
't  wan't  two  hours  'f o'  dat  nigger  wuz  wadin* 
'roun'  in  de  tan  vats  ten'in'  ter  he  business. 
Dey  ain't  no  hear-tell  'bout  dis,  Miss  Sally, 
kaze  I  seed  it  wid  my  own  eyes. 

"  I  wish  you  please,  ma'am,  open  it,"  con- 
tinued Uncle  Remus,  "  en  read  w'at  de  intents 
un  it  mought  be,  kaze  I  oughter  be  out  yan 


UNCLE  REMUS  RECEIVES  A  VALENTINE.    229 

right    now,    puttin'  dem  sallid    seed    in    de 
groun\" 

"  Miss  Sally  "  opened  the  envelope,  and 
drew  forth  a  highly  colored  cartoon  of  a  negro 
cramming  a  huge  pie  in  his  mouth.  She 
read :  — 

"  He  eats,  he  sleeps,  he  steals  on  the  sly, 
Nigger,  big  nigger,  with  a  mouthful  of  pie." 

Uncle  Remus  took  the  caricature  and  ex- 
amined it  critically.  Contrary  to  expectations, 
he  did  not  make  any  demonstration  of  anger. 
He  frowned  heavily  for  a  moment,  and  then 
sighed. 

"  Is  dish  year  wa't  folks  calls  a  volyumtine, 
Miss  Sally?  "  he  asked  presently. 

"  Of  course  it  is." 

"  Well,  den,  I  'm  done.  I  can't  stay  'roun* 
yer.  My  time 's  done  up.  I  'm  a-bleedz  ter 
go.  I  know  dey  ain't  no  nigger  man  w'at  'ud 
dast  ter  sen'  me  dis,  en  if  it 's  a  nigger  'oman, 
den  I  ain't  got  no  time  ter  tarry  in  de  state  er 
Georgy.  You  all  bin  treatin'  me  mighty  well, 
you  en  Mars  John,  but  w'en  dey  comes  at  me 
dis  away,  I  bleedz  ter  go." 

"  Why  ?     What  is  the  matter  ?  " 

"  No  'm ;  I  ain't  ezcusin'  you  all ;  I  ain't 
excusin'  nobody  un  it.     Hit  des  happen  so* 


230  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

Yit  I  got  ter  move.  I  is  dat.  Fus'  news  you 
know,  word  '11  go  'roun'  ter  my  ole  'oman  dat 
I  been  kyarin  on  wid  some  yuther  'oman.  She 
look  lak  she  mighty  feebly,  my  ole  'oman  do, 
but  dey  ain't  no  mo'  actier  creetur  dan  w'at  she 
is  w'en  she  git  'er  Affikin  up.  En  den  bime- 
by  yer  '11  come  Brer  John  Henry,  en  he  '11 
gimme  er  invite  f  er  ter  draw  out  er  de  church. 
Oh,  no  'm !  Man  w'at  gits  volyumtines,  dat 
man  ain't  ter  have  no  peace  er  min'  less'n  he 
git  out  er  de  country.  I  done  got  de  'speunce 
un  it,  mon." 

It  is  unnecessary  to  remark  that  the  old  man 
is  still  digging  around  in  his  Miss  Sally's 
garden  and  quarreling  with  the  other  negroes. 


in. 

"miss  sally"  and  the  tree  man. 

The  other  day  Uncle  Remus  had  an  op 
portunity  to  kill  two  birds  with  one  stone  — 
an  opportunity  which  he  promptly  but  quietly 
made  the  most  of.  Last  year  a  consumptive- 
looking  young  man  came  into  the  front  yard 
where  the  old  negro  was  working,  and  after 
walking  around  and  examining  the  shrubbery, 
suggested  that  appearances  could  be  materially 
improved  by  the  addition  of  a  few  trees  and 
flowers.  Uncle  Remus  resented  the  familiar 
way  in  which  the  young  man  went  nosing 
about,  and  he  resented  the  intimation  that  the 
yard  was  n't  as  nice  looking  as  he  and  his  Miss 
Sally  could  make  it. 

"Where  is  the  lady  of  the  house?"  in- 
quired the  young  man. 

"Who?  Miss  Sally?"  responded  Uncle 
Remus,  leaning  confidently  upon  his  rake. 
"  She  in  dar,  some'rs,  I  speck."  The  tone 
was  not  conciliatory. 


$32  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  I  guess  I  can  sell  her  some  ornamental 
trees  and  some  nice  flowers/'  said  the  young 
man. 

"  Goodness  knows  w'at  she  want  wid  um. 
Kaze  she  done  got  all  de  sorts  and  sizes 
w'at  '11  grow  roun'  yer.  I  dunner  wharbouts 
she  gwineter  put  um." 

But  the  young  man  rang  the  bell,  and  pretty 
soon  he  was  engaged  in  showing  the  lady 
through  a  large  portfolio  containing  pictures 
of  flowers  and  trees.  These  pictures  were  not 
beautiful,  but  they  were  casually  attractive. 
They  were  gaudy.  The  green  of  the  trees 
looked  as  if  it  could  be  stirred  with  a  stick, 
and  the  flowers  were  all  in  a  state  of  inflam- 
mation alarming  to  behold.  But  the  young 
man  was  a  good  talker.  His  fluency  seemed 
to  lend  a  sort  of  perspective  to  the  glare  of 
the  pictures.  His  persuasiveness  softened  the 
harsh  outlines  and  gave  tone  to  the  whole. 
Uncle  Remus  sang  aggressively  while  this  was 
going  on,  but  no  one  paid  any  attention  to 
him.  The  lady  purchased  twenty  dollars' 
worth  of  trees,  shrubs,  and  flowers,  and  the 
young  man  went  on  his  way  rejoicing. 

In  due  time  the  order  was  filled,  the  plants 
set   out,  and    the   young  man    collected   his 


! 


"MISS  SALLY"  AND  THE  TREE  MAN.      233 

money,  not  without  a  protest  from  the  lady's 
husband,  in  which  Uncle  Remus  heartily 
joined.  Most  of  the  flowers  withered,  but 
several  of  the  trees  and  shrubs  grew  and 
thrived.  Some  of  them  Uncle  Remus  re- 
cognized as  soon  as  they  put  forth  in  the 
spring,  and  as  soon  as  he  had  verified  his  re- 
cognition by  careful  comparison,  he  dropped 
his  work,  went  to  the  horse  lot,  slipped  under 
the  buggy  shelter,  and  laughed  until  he  was 
exhausted. 

But  he  held  his  peace.  Lately,  however,  his 
Miss  Sally  has  been  teasing  him  so  unmer- 
cifully that  he  has  been  compelled  to  make 
some  counter-demonstration,  and  the  other 
day  it  culminated  in  an  undoubted  victory  for 
the  old  man.  He  begun  it  very  cunningly. 
When  he  was  sure  his  Miss  Sally  could  hear 
him,  he  would  talk  rapidly  to  himself  in  a  low 
tone,  and  then  break  into  a  fit  of  laughter 
that  appeared  to  be  uncontrollable.  Then  he 
would  suddenly  grow  serious,  sigh  heavily, 
groan,  shake  his  head,  and  proceed  with  his 
work  in  a  forlorn,  dejected  sort  of  way.  This 
went  on  day  after  day,  until  his  Miss  Sally 
began  to  have  serious  doubts  of  the  old  man's 
sanity. 


234  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  If  you  go  on  in  this  way,  you  will  land 
in  the  lunatic  asylum/'  she  exclaimed  one 
day,  after  Uncle  Kemus  had  gone  through 
with  one  of  his  paroxysms  of  laughing  and 
groaning.  "  Come !  I  want  you  to  behave 
yourself;  I  don't  want  any  crazy  niggers 
around  here." 

Uncle  Remus' s  only  reply  was  a  groan,  and 
that  was  all  the  explanation  or  excuse  he 
deigned  to  offer. 

But  the  next  day  everything  was  made  clear. 
The  lady  was  in  the  flower-yard  giving  Uncle 
Remus  some  directions,  when  he  suddenly 
dropped  his  hoe,  and  called  out  to  some  person 
going  by,  — 

"  Boss !  —  Oh,  Boss  !  —  I  wish  you  step  dis 
way  a  minit,  ef  you  please,  sir."  It  was  the 
consumptive-looking  nursery  agent.  He  was 
evidently  in  a  hurry,  and  hesitated  about  stop- 
ping.    He  pulled  out  his  watch  nervously. 

"  I  declare,  Uncle !  I  —  er  —  I  have  n't 
hardly"— 

"  Dess  a  minit,  Boss,"  said  Uncle  Remus  in 
an  insinuating  tone.  "  Man  come  by  yer  ter- 
day  en  ax  me  whar  you  live,  kaze  he  say  he 
wanter  git  some  er  dem  s'ubs  w'at  you  bin 
sellin'." 


> 


. 


"MISS  SALLY"  AND  THE  TREE  MAN.      235 

Glancing  at  the  lady,  and  seeing  that  she 
was  paying  no  attention  to  him,  the  plausible 
young  man  seemed  to  recover  his  assurance. 
He  drew  out  his  note-book. 

"  What  was  the  gentleman's  name  ?  I 
should  be  glad  to  supply  him." 

Uncle  Remus  took  off  his  hat  and  scratched 
his  head  slowly. 

"  Lem  —  me  —  see.  Look  lak  I  oughtn'  ter 
f ergit  dat  man  name  off'n  my  mine.  He  come 
'long  yer  day  'f o'  yistiddy,  and  'low,  he  did  : 

" '  Dem  mighty  nice  s'ubs  en  trees  you  got 
dar.     Whar  you  git  um  ? ' 

"  Wid  dat,  I  ups  en  sez,  s'  I, *  Dey  's  a  young 
gentermun  w'at  fetches  um  'roun',  en  I  '11  tell 
'im  'bout  you,'  s'  I. 

"  <  Do  so,'  s'e,  '  en  ef  he  fotch  you  dat  ar 
swamp  poplar,  en  dat  ar  sycamo',  en  dat  ar 
sweet-gum,  en  dat  ar  honey-suckle  bush,  I 
want  some  er  de  same  kin'.  Dey  are  mighty 
scase  'roun'  yer,'  s'e." 

The  lady,  who  had  been  pretending  to  ar- 
range a  rose-vine,  turned  around  at  this,  but 
the  enterprising  agent  was  gone. 

"  Remus  !  "  she  exclaimed  in  a  tragic  voice, 
"  call  that  man  back." 

Uncle  Remus  called  him,  but  the  man  never 


236  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

turned  his  head,  and  he  soon  disappeared 
around  the  corner.  There  was  no  tag  on  the 
sweet-gum  tree,  but  that  on  the  honeysuckle 
read  "  rhododendron/'  that  on  the  sycamore, 
"American  plane-tree,"  and  that  on  the  swamp- 
poplar,  "  American  tulip  tree." 

Uncle  Remus's  Miss  Sally  went  into  the 
house,  and  at  dinner  time  he  learned  that  she 
had  gone  to  bed  with  the  sick  headache.  Just 
before  night,  "  Miss  Sally  "  felt  well  enough  to 
get  up,  and  when  her  husband  came  home  he 
found  her  going  about  the  house  in  a  subdued, 
half  reproachful  way,  with  her  head  tied  up. 
She  had  intended  to  say  nothing  of  the  swindle 
of  which  she  was  the  victim,  but  after  supper 
Uncle  Remus  engaged  the  cook  in  conversa- 
tion, and  after  some  palaver,  his  Mars  John 
heard  him  exclaim,  with  well-feigned  indigna- 
tion :  — 

"  Dat  w'at  makes  I  say  w'at  I  does.  When 
folks  treats  nice  w'ite  'oman  ez  Miss  Sally  is 
dat  away,  den  hit  's  des  'bout  time  fer  ter  go 
'roun'  quirin'  ef  dey  's  any  law  in  deze  Nu- 
ninety  States." 

His  Miss  Sally  also  heard  him,  and  she  be- 
came thoroughly  indignant. 

"  If  you  don't  clear  out  of  that  dining-room, 


i 


"MISS  SALLY"  AND  THE  TREE  MAN.      237 

you  miserable  old  wretch/'  she  exclaimed, 
"  I  '11  brain  you  with  the  coal-scuttle." 

Whereupon  she  cried,  and  told  her  husband 
all  about  it,  and  this  hard-hearted  man  laughed 
so  immoderately  that  "  Miss  Sally  "  fluttered 
off  to  bed  in  a  huff. 

When  the  gentleman  went  to  close  the  house 
for  the  night,  he  found  Uncle  Remus  sitting 
contentedly  by  the  dining-room  fire. 

"  I  speck  Miss  Sally  mighty  mad,"  said  the 
old  philosopher,  when  he  was  roused  from  his 
doze,  "  kaze  she  done  f orgit  f er  ter  put  out 
dem  ar  taters  w'at  she  promise  me.  Dey  er 
up  dar  in  dat  ar  lef-hand  sidebo'd  draw,"  he 
explained,  "  en  de  key,  hit 's  up  dar  on  de  top 
she'f.  Don't  git  um  all,  Mars  John,  kaze 
Miss  Sally  '11  be  a-lightin'  on  ter  me." 


IV. 

INTIMIDATION  OF  A  COLORED  VOTER. 

"  I  hope  you  all  young  gentermens  is  well," 
Baid  Uncle  Remus,  as  he  entered  the  editorial 
rooms  of  "  The  Constitution,"  the  other  day. 
"  I  mighty  po'ly  myse'f,  but  dat  ain't  hender 
me  from  hopin'  dat  yuther  folks  is  keepin' 
way  from  de  doctor  shops.  Many  is  de  po' 
creeter  w'at  done  been  ter  doctor  shops  one 
time  too  much.  Yit  look  at  me.  I  bin  dar 
mighty  nigh  much  ez  anybody,  en  Miss  Sally 
say  dey  's  lots  er  hard  work  in  me  yit,  'vidin' 
anybody  kin  git  it  out'n  me.  In  my  young 
days  I  use  ter  year  talk  dat  de  nighest  road 
ter  de  buryin'-groun'  wuz  'roun'  by  de  doctor 
shop,  but  'spite  er  dat  I  keeps  on  taking 
der  truck,  en  I  ain't  see  dat  it  do  me  no  harm. 
Ef  any  you  young  gentermens  gits  ter  feel- 
in'  low  down  in  de  sperets,  en  sorter  'quare 
in  de  naborhoods  er  de  gizzard,  you  des 
rack  'roun'  to  Mars  Dock  Alexander  en  git 
some    er   dem    ar  quiernine    en    blue    mast 


INTIMIDATION  OF  A  COLORED  VOTER.     239 

pills,  en  ef  dey  don't  set  you  up,  you  kin  des 
lay  de  blame  onter  me.  When  ole  Miss  was 
'live,  de  doctor  'd  come  'roun'  'bout  dis  time  er 
year,  en  all  de  niggers,  little  en  big,  'ud  hatter 
come  up  en  git  a  dost  er  jollup  en  callymel ; 
but  deze  days  you  gotter  hunt  de  doctor  up 
en  git  a  piece  er  paper  en  beat  'roun'  town 
twel  you  kin  fine  some  un  fer  ter  mix  up 
de  truck." 

Uncle  Kemus  paused,  and  then  broke  into 
a  loud  laugh. 

"  Wat  de  name  er  goodness  is  I  doin'  ?  I 
des  crope  up  yer  fer  ter  ax  you  all  young  gen- 
termens  sump'n,  en  yer  I  is  runnin'  on  like  a 
cat- bird  in  a  peach  orchard.  I  dunner  how 
you  all  is,  but  I  ain't  got  no  time  fer  ter  be 
projickin'." 

"  Gracious  heaven  !  "  exclaimed  one  of  the 
young  men,  "  do  you  hear  that  ?  He  says  he 
has  n't  got  time  !  Won't  somebody  lead  him 
out  and  ask  him  to  call  again  and  say  one 
word  —  one  little  word  —  when  he  has  got 
time?" 

"  En  needer  is  I  got  time  fer  ter  be  runnin' 
on  'longer  you  all,"  Uncle  Remus  retorted  in- 
dignantly. "  You  all  kin  take  yo'  shears  an' 
split  dem  ar  newspapers  wide  open,  but  ole 


240         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIE&DS. 

Remus  can't  take  no  shears  en  cut  truck  outer 
t'er  folks  gyardin,  kaze  ef  I  did  dey'd  slap  de 
law  on  me.  En  ef  I  ain't  got  time  ter  stan' 
yer  en  talk,  co'se  I  ain't  got  no  time  fer  ter 
be  gwine  ter  law.  Dat  gyardin  out  dar  at 
Wes'  Een'  callin'  me  right  now,  en  I  ain't  got 
a  minnit  ter  spar'  • —  dat  I  ain't." 

"  Suppose  you  go  down  in  the  fire-escape," 
some  one  suggested,  but  Uncle  Remus  ignored 
the  hint. 

"  Man  down  dar  on  de  street  ax  how  Fgwine 
vote  dis  time,  en  I  des  runned  up  yer  fer  ter 
ax  you  all  gentermens  ef  deyer  a  gwinter  be 
n'er  'lection  in  de  Nunited  States  er  Georgy." 

"  Why,  of  course  there  is  !  " 

"  Now  ain't  dat  too  much ! "  exclaimed 
Uncle  Remus  with  unmistakable  bitterness. 
"  Man  go  up  en  vote,  en  he  ain't  got  time  ter 
change  his  cloze  'f  o'  he  gotter  rack  up  en  vote 
ag'in." 

"  Why,  have  n't  you  heard  about  Boynton, 
Bacon,  and  the  rest  ?  " 

"I   year  Miss   Sally  readin'  out  names  en 
dates,  en  'sputin'  'longer  Mars   John,  but  I 
tuck  de  idee  dey  wuz  one  er  deze  yer  cake- 
walks  gwine  on  up  dar." 
Up  where?" 


a 


INTIMIDATION  OF  A  COLORED  VOTER.    241 

"  Up  dar  whar  de  sleepin'  kyars  comes  f  urn ; 
some'rs  up  dar." 

"  He  seems  to  be  thoroughly  familiar  with 
the  geography  of  our  common  country/'  re- 
marked one  of  the  young  men. 

Uncle  Remus  grinned  broadly. 

"I  lay  dey  don't  fool  me  on  de  cake-walk, 
kaze  dey  wuz  a  nigger  man  in  one  un  um ; 
but  w'at  pester  me  is  deze  yer  'lections  f  oller- 
in'  atter  one  er  n'er  des  lak  a  drove  er  sheep. 
Eve'y  time  dey  comes,  ole  Remus  gits  in 
trouble  wuss  en  wuss." 

"Why  so?" 

"  Des  kaze.  Mars  John  en  Miss  Sally  gits 
ter  'sputin'  'bout  w'ich  de  bes'  man,  en  den 
dey  comes  atter  me.  Hit 's  '  Remus,  how  you 
gwine  ter  vote?  '  en  '  No,  you  ain't,'  en  i  Yes 
you  is,'  ontwel  I  des  natally  gits  wo'  out. 
Hit 's  pull  en  haul,  pull  en  haul,  day  in  en 
day  out,  en  I  ain't  got  no  peace  er  min'  twel 
'lection  day  done  gone.  Miss  Sally  say  vote 
dish  year  way,  Mars  John  say  vote  dat  ar  way, 
en  w'en  dat  de  case,  w'at  a  ole  nigger  like 
me  gwine  do  ?  " 

"  Well,  how  do  you  vote,  after  all?  " 

"  Dat  w'at  I  want  to  know :  dat  des  zackly 
w'at  I  'm  atter.     Mars  John,  he  'low  he  de 


242         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

boss ;  yit  I  notices  dat  w'en  Miss  Sally  say  I 
ain't  gwine  to  git  no  gravy  on  my  grits,  dey 
ain't  no  gravy  dar,  en  de  man  w'at  kin  eat 
grits  widout  gravy  is  got  mo'  strenk  in  his 
stummuck  dan  w'at  I  is.  Fum  dis  out  twel 
atter  de  'lection  done  good  en  gone,  you  kin 
des  put  it  down  dat  de  rheumatiz  done  struck 
me  in  de  j'ints,  en  hit  '11  be  dat  servigrous  dat 
I  can't  move  skacely.  En  eve'y  time  dey  say 
vote,  I  'm  a-gwine  ter  grunt  en  groan  like  one 
er  deze  yer  Wes'  P'int  ingines.  But  shoo ! 
I  ain't  got  time  fer  ter  be  runnin'  on  yer  wid 
you  all." 


A  STORY  OF  A  BLIND  HORSE. 

Uncle  Remus  walked  into  "  The  Constitu- 
tion "  office  one  morning  recently  after  an  ab- 
sence of  several  days.  He  seemed  to  be  rather 
fagged  out,  and  yet  there  was  a  humorous 
twinkle  in  his  eye. 

"  I  'speck  you  all  gentermens  done  got  de 
notion  dat  I'm  a  mighty  kuse  ole  creetur," 
he  said,  chuckling  sheepishly. 

"He  has  been  in  more  trouble,"  said  one 
of  the  young  men  to  another,  in  a  confidential 
tone,  but  loud  enough  for  Uncle  Remus  to 
hear.  "  If  there 's  any  trouble  in  Pulton 
County,  the  old  wretch  will  shut  his  eyes  and 
walk  right  into  it." 

"  Trufe,  too  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus 
with  unction  ;  "  dat 's  de  Lord's  trufe.  Look 
lak  I  done  got  ter  dem  p'ints  whar  I  oughter 
settle  down  en  do  lak  t'er  folks,  but  de  mo' 
w'at  I  try  ter  settle  down,  de  wuss  trouble  I 
draps  inter.     I  done  got  so  I  feared  ter  tu'n 


244         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

a  cornder,  kase  I  mos'  know  ole  Satan  done 
got  some  kinder  trap  set  f  er  me.  It 's  mighty 
kuse  —  mighty  kuse." 

"  Well,  what 's  the  difficulty  now  ?  You 
look  as  if  you  had  just  fought  your  way  out 
of  one  of  Satan's  traps." 

"  I  des  got  out  er  bed,  bless  you  !  "  There 
was  a  hint  of  boastfulness  in  the  old  man's 
tone.  "I  bin  layin'  up  same  lak  man  in 
hospital,  en  I  bin  had  mo'  doctor  truck  dan 
de  law  'lows ;  but  spite  er  dat  I  got  mo'  so' 
places  'roun'  munks  my  ribs  dan  a  man  w'at 
bin  run  over  wid  de  kyars.     I  is,  mon." 

"  Well,  we  might  just  as  well  suspend  opera- 
tions and  let  him  tell  us  all  about  it,"  exclaimed 
the  police  reporter,  flinging  down  his  pencil 
in  despair.  "  Nobody  can  pursue  the  literary 
calling  in  the  building  where  that  old  repro- 
bate does  his  talking." 

"  T'er  day,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  ignoring  the 
police  reporter,  "  Mars  John  holler  me  up  en 
say  he  want  some  grass  seed  sowed  in  de  peach 
orchard.  He  say  he  want  de  groun'  broke  up 
good,  en  den  he  want  de  seeds  horrored  in. 
I  ax  'im  wharbouts  is  I  gwine  ter  git  a  hoss, 
en  he  up'n  'low  I  better  go  borrer  one,  en 
wi'les  I  'm  a  borryin'  de  hoss  I  better  borrer 


A  STORY  OF  A  BLIND  HOUSE.  245 

de  horror.  I  tuck'n  traipse  over  dat  neigh- 
borhood plum  twel  dinner-time,  en  I  ain't  git 
no  hoss.  Dis  man  say  he  done  loant  his'n  out, 
en  t'er  man  say  he  bleedz  ter  do  some  ploughin' 
hisse'f. 

"  Bimeby,  I  struck  up  wid  Brer  Plato,  I 
did,  en  he  say  he  kin  make  out  f  er  ter  loan 
me  his  hoss,  ef  I  '11  take  good  care  un  'im. 
Brer  Plato  hoss  blin'  ez  a  bat,  en  yet  blin' 
hoss  better  dan  no  hoss.  So  I  tuck  'im,  en  I 
put  de  gear  on,  en  I  kyar'd  'im  home  en  broke 
up  de  groun',  an  blin'  do'  he  wuz,  dat  ole 
hoss  move  right  'long.  Atter  I  git  de  groun' 
ploughed  en  de  seed  sowed,  lo  en  beholes,  I 
done  forgit  de  horror,  en  I  tuck'n  ax  Miss 
Sally  'bout  it,  kaze  Mars  John  done  gone 
down  town.  Miss  Sally,  she  up'n  say  dey  want 
no  horrors  in  her  time,  en  she  'low  I  better 
git  a  bresh  en  drag  it  'cross  de  groun',  en  do 
lak  folks  done  w'en  folks  had  some  sense. 
Wid  dat  I  goes,  I  does,  en  I  cuts  me  down  a 
good  size  tree,  en  drug  'er  inter  de  back  yard. 

"Eve'ybody,"  continued  Uncle  Remus, 
"wuz  tennin'  ter  der  own  business.  Miss 
Sally,  she  uz  dustin'  'roun'  in  de  back  po'ch 
whar  dey  wan't  no  dus',  en  Sis  Tempy,  she  uz 
chunkin'  up  chips  roun'  de  wash-pot  en  singin' 


246         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

one  er  dem  ar  glory  chunes.  I  stop  de  hoss 
at  de  back  steps  fer  ter  ax  Miss  Sally  sump'n', 
en  des  'bout  dat  time,  dat  ar  nigger  'oman  w'at 
mess  up  de  w'ite  folks  vittles  fer  'urn  start  ter 
fling  de  dish-water  out  de  winder,  en  de  pan 
come  wid  it  —  kerblimidy  blam  —  blam  !  " 

"What  then?"  one  of  the  young  men 
Asked,  as  Uncle  Remus  paused. 

"  Gentermens  !  you  oughter  des  seed  dat  ole 
blin'  hoss.  He  sorter  squat,  en  den  he  lipped 
up  in  de  a'r,  en  natally  tuck  wings.  De  fus' 
pass  he  make,  he  fling  me  plum  thoo  Miss 
Sally  honeysuckle  vine,  en  wrop  me  'roun'  de 
chanybe'y  tree.  Den  he  run  over  de  wash- 
pot  en  knock  Sis  Tempy  down,  en  drug  dat 
big  bresh  'crosst  'er.  Let  'lone  dat,"  contin- 
ued Uncle  Remus,  speaking  in  a  subdued, 
confidential  tone ;  "  let  lone  dat,  he  drug  dat 
bresh  'crosst  Sis  Tempy  de  wrong  way.  Gen- 
termens, don't  talk  !  I  year  Sis  Tempy  groan- 
in'  'bout  some  kinder  stiffness  in  de  j'ints,  but 
de  way  she  shuck  dem  shins  in  de  a'r  wuz 
scan'lous.  Mc'  *peshually  w'en  de  bilin'  water 
fum  de  wash-pot  run  und'  'er.  She  des  fetch 
one  squall  en  riz  fum  dar,  en  made  fer  de 
house  ;  en  w'en  she  riz,  look  lak  all  'er  cloze 
bin  cut  bobtail."  . . 


A  STORY  OF  A  BLIND  HORSE.  247 

u  What  became  of  the  horse  ?  " 

"  Shoo  !  dat  hoss  gallop  off  in  de  ploughed 
groun'  en  fall  down,  en  time  I  git  whar  he  is, 
he  done  had  a  nap.  He  des  lay  dar  des  ez 
ca'm  ez  a  dead  pig  in  de  sunshine.  Wat  I 
lak  ter  know  is  dish  yer :  Ef  dat  ar  hoss  bun', 
how  kin  he  see  f  er  ter  run  'crosst  Sis  Tempy  ? 
Now  dat  w'at  I  lak  ter  know. 

"  Sis  Tempy  done  sent  me  wud,"  said  Uncle 
Remus,  looking  serious,  "  dat  I  '11  be  a  lots 
older  man  dan  w'at  I  is  'f o'  I  gits  her  fergiv- 
ance ;  en  I  'speck  dat 's  so,  kaze  deze  yer  ole- 
time  niggers  is  a  heap  mo'  servigrous  dan 
w'at  dey  wuz  'f  o'  de  war.  I  'm  gwineter 
give  Sis  Tempy  de  big  road.  You  yeard  my 
horn!" 


VL 

UNCLE   REMUS  IN   LIMBO. 

As  the  result  of  a  very  curious  train  of 
circumstances,  Uncle  Remus  was  brought  up 
before  Recorder  Andy  Calhoun  the  other  day. 
He  was  triumphantly  vindicated,  but  the  cir- 
cumstances that  led  to  his  arrest  as  well  as 
his  vindication  may  be  of  some  interest  to  the 
reader.  It  seems  that  Uncle  Remus's  "  Miss 
Sally,"  after  counting  the  clothes  brought  in 
by  the  washerwoman  recently,  discovered  that 
one  of  her  husband's  night-shirts  was  missing. 
It  happened  to  be  one  which  she  had  made 
herself,  and  she  immediately  called  Uncle  Re- 
mus up  and  told  him  to  go  after  the  missing 
garment,  after  describing  it  with  great  par- 
ticularity. The  old  man  was  perfectly  willing 
to  go  after  the  shirt,  but  two  circumstances 
put  him  out  of  humor.  The  day  was  Friday. 
This  fact  was  ominous  enough  of  itself,  but 
the  omen  was  made  portentous  by  the  addi- 
tional fact  that  Uncle  Remus  was  compelled  to 


UNCLE  REMUS  IN  LIMBO.  249 

turn  back,  after  he  had  gone  a  little  way,  to 
inquire  whether  a  red  or  a  blue  silk  vine  ran 
around  the  collar  of  the  shirt.  This  was  irritat- 
ing, and  when  the  old  man  got  fairly  started, 
he  was  mad.  When  he  reached  the  washer- 
woman's house  she  was  out,  and  he  was  com- 
pelled to  wait  some  little  time  for  her  re- 
turn. When  she  did  come,  Uncle  Remus  was 
thoroughly  worked  up,  and  his  anger  was  in- 
tensified a  thousandfold  by  the  loud  imper- 
tinence of  the  woman,  whose  piercing  treble 
voice  was  the  delight  of  the  religious  congre- 
gation of  which  she  was  the  leading  spirit,  and 
the  terror  of  those  against  whom  it  was  used 
as  a  weapon. 

"  Whar  Mars  John  night-gown  ?  "  exclaimed 
Uncle  Remus  savagely,  as  the  woman  came  up. 

"  Whose  Mars  John  ?  I  let  you  know  here 's 
what  ain't  got  no  Mars  John.  Not  dis  week." 
She  held  her  head  high  in  the  air,  and  her 
loud  tone  was  irritating. 

*  Well,  den,  ef  you  ain't  got  no  Mars  John," 
said  Uncle  Remus,  "  you  ain't  got  no  bizness 
wid  Mars  John  night-gown ;  en  you  des  might 
ez  well  go  in  dar  en  git  it  out'n  yo'  chist,  whar 
you  got  it  hid  away." 

"  You  all  hear  what  he  savin'  ?  "  said  the 


250         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

woman  to  two  or  three  negroes  who  were 
lounging  around. 

"  Git  dat  night-gown  !  "  was  Uncle  Remus' s 
imperative  demand. 

"  Who  ever  hear  talk  er  men  folks  w'arin9 
night-gowns  ? "  the  woman  exclaimed  con- 
temptuously. 

"  Git  dat  night-gown,  you  triflin'  huzzy, 
yelse  I  '11  have  you  brung  up." 

"  Who  up  ?  Have  who  brung  up,  you  nasty, 
low  life  ole  vilyun  !  " 

All  this  and  much  more,  until  presently  a 
policeman  came  along  and  arrested  the  woman 
on  a  charge  of  disorderly  conduct.  Perhaps 
he  ought  to  have  arrested  Uncle  Remus  on 
the  same  charge,  but  the  old  man,  with  an  eye 
to  precisely  such  a  contingency,  made  no  great 
display  of  his  voice.  He  was  very  mad,  but 
he  didn't  yell  as  the  woman  did. 

At  any  rate  the  policeman  did  n't  arrest 
him,  and  the  woman  had  no  sooner  reached 
the  station-house  than  she  preferred  a  charge 
of  "  probusness  "  (as  she  called  it)  against  him, 
and  an  officer  was  sent  after  him. 

Both  the  distinguished  persons  found 
friends  to  answer  for  their  prompt  appearance 
at  Recorder   Calhoun's   court.     The  woman's 


UNCLE  REMUS  IN  LIMBO  251 

society  brethren  came  to  her  aid  in  the  matter, 
and  Uncle  Remus' s  Miss  Sally  sent  this  mes- 
sage over  the  telephone  :  — 

"John,  that  miserable  old  reprobate  has 
been  arrested  by  a  policeman.  .  .  .  No,  I  tell 
you  I  'm  not  joking.  ...  I  wish  you  would 
go  down  and  get  him  out.  .  .  .  Ten  dollars ! 
.  .  .  Well,  what 's  the  use  of  being  a  lawyer 
if  you  can't  get  him  out  without  paying  ten 
dollars  ?  Well,  it  won't  do  for  the  old  wretch 
to  stay  in  that  station-house  all  night  this  kind 
of  weather.  .  .  .  Can't  you  go  now?  .  .  . 
Well,  I  wish  you  would.  .  .  .  Come  home 
soon." 

The  next  morning  both  parties  were  on 
hand  when  court  opened.  The  friends  of  the 
woman  had  employed  a  young  lawyer  to  de- 
fend her,  and  he,  with  an  eye  to  humorous 
results,  pushed  the  case  against  Uncle  Remus. 
In  the  case  against  the  woman,  the  testimony 
of  the  policeman  who  arrested  her  was  suffi- 
cient, and  a  small  fine  was  imposed  upon  her 
which  was  promptly  paid,  after  which  she  and 
her  friends  remained  in  the  court-room  to  en- 
joy the  discomfiture  of  Uncle  Remus. 

The  young  lawyer  rose  and  said  that  as  the 
case  against  the  old  man  was  a  serious  one  he 


252  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

would  beg  the  court  to  indulge  him  in  a  few 
opening  remarks.  He  proposed  to  prove,  he 
said,  that  the  language  employed  by  the  pri- 
soner (giving  solemn  emphasis  to  the  word 
"  prisoner ")  against  his  client  was  not  only 
opprobrious,  but  libelous.  The  prisoner  had 
in  effect  charged  an  honest  woman  with  theft. 
The  charge  was  not  made  openly,  but  by  in- 
direction ;  but  in  a  case  of  this  kind,  what  was 
indirection  but  insinuation  ?  What  was  in- 
sinuation but  slander  ?  What  was  slander  but 
libel  ?  For  his  part,  he  was  glad  that  the  case 
was  not  to  be  tried  before  a  jury,  for  the  pri- 
soner was  old,  and  the  verdict  of  a  jury,  which 
would  be  nothing  less  than  a  term  of  years  in 
the  penitentiary,  might  bear  too  heavily  upon 
him.  The  young  lawyer  went  on  in  this 
strain  for  three  or  four  minutes,  and  finally 
announced  that  if  the  prisoner  had  no  counsel 
he  would  proceed  to  call  his  first  witness  — 
the  woman  who  had  been  so  outrageously 
slandered.  Before  the  witness  could  be  called, 
however,  Uncle  Remus  spoke  up. 

"  Mars  Andy  Calhoun,"  he  said,  "  you  bin 
knowm'  me  a  mighty  long  time,  en  I  bin 
knowin'  you ;  but  ef  dish  yer  de  way  de  matter 
stan',  den  I  'm  gwineter  make  admittance  un 
it,  'fo'  hit  gits  wuss.     I  aint  gwineter  say  1 


UNCLE  REMUS  IN  LIMBO.  253 

did  n't  exzuse  dat  'oman  er  takin'  Mars  John 
night-gown,  kaze  I  did ;  but  yit,  'f  o'  I  go  ter 
de  chain-gang,  I  wish  you  be  so  good  ez  ter 
sen'  er  p'leeceman  out  dar  ter  dat  'oman  house 
en  make  'im  git  dat  night-gown,  kaze  Miss 
Sally  done  sot  'er  heart  on  dat  gyarment,  en 
ef  she  don't  git  it  back,  I  never  is  ter  year  de 
las'  un  it.  I  thank  you  might' ly  ef  you  do 
dat,  Mars  Andy.  De  way  de  p'leeceman  kin  tell 
it  is  by  er  blue  silk  muscadime  vine,  w'ich  de 
vine  she  run  up'n  down  in  front  en  'roun'  de 
collar,  en  all  'roun'  de  rizbuns." 

It  is  perhaps  needless  to  remark  here  that 
when  the  young  lawyer  proceeded  to  call  his 
witness  she  was  gone.  She  was  gone,  and  she 
failed  to  return.  The  prospect  of  a  domi- 
ciliary visit  from  a  policeman  was  a  little  too 
much  for  her.  The  case  against  Uncle  Remus 
was  dismissed,  and  when  the  old  man  got 
home  he  found  that  the  brilliantly  embroid- 
ered night-shirt  had  been  returned.  His  Miss 
Sally  gave  him  a  severe  lecture,  but  his  only 
response  was :  — 

"  You  better  lem  me  hang  Mars  John 
night-gown  out  in  de  sun,  kaze  a  nigger 
'oman  w'at  '11  steal  dat  kind  er  doin's  ain't 
none  too  good  fer  ter  have  de  small-pox  hid 


some'rs  'roun'." 


vn. 

UNCLE   REMUS    THINKS    HE   FINDS    A   SNAKE . 

During  the  past  summer,  the  lady  whom 
Uncle  Remus  calls  "  Miss  Sally/'  and  for  whom 
he  does  odd  jobs,  went  to  one  of  the  Virginia 
watering  places.  For  some  reason  or  other, 
her  stay  was  prolonged  until  the  latter  part  of 
September.  When  she  returned,  she  found 
her  backyard  overgrown  with  grass  and  weeds, 
although  she  had  particularly  cautioned  the 
old  negro  to  keep  it  clean.  She  was  very 
much  surprised  and  somewhat  indignant  at 
the  apparent  neglect,  and  the  next  morning 
she  made  it  convenient  to  be  in  and  about  the 
front  porch  as  much  as  possible,  in  order  to 
employ  the  first  idle  negro  that  came  along 
and  have  the  whole  lot  put  in  order. 

Among  the  first  to  put  in  an  appearance 
was  Uncle  Remus  himself.  He  had  a  small 
garden  hoe  on  his  shoulder  and  a  heavy  cane 
in  his  hand.  He  stopped  at  the  gate  and 
looked  up  and  down  the  street,  and  then  came 


UNCLE  REMUS  FINDS  A  SNAKE.  255 

slowly  into  the  yard.  The  lady  watched  him 
as  he  came  up  the  walk.  His  face,  furrowed 
with  the  lines  of  age  and  laughter,  was  very 
grave,  and  there  was  a  hitch  in  his  gait  which 
told  of  a  struggle  with  rheumatism.  The  lady 
was  watching  him  from  a  window,  and,  some- 
how, her  indignation  disappeared  as  she  gazed 
at  the  weather-beaten  features  of  the  old  man. 
She  had  known  him  since  she  was  a  little 
child,  although  her  own  youth  had  long  since 
taken  wings,  and  she  was  inclined  to  look 
kindly  on  all  his  failings.  He  was  a  family 
appendage,  a  piece  of  furniture  that  had  be- 
come valuable  as  a  relic. 

Though  the  lady  is  a  matron,  with  a  plentiful 
sprinkling  of  gray  in  her  hair,  a  spirit  of  mis- 
chief seized  her.  She  went  forth  on  the  porch, 
and  before  Uncle  Remus,  with  a  happy  smile 
on  his  face,  could  take  off  his  hat  and  give 
her  a  genuine  plantation  greeting,  she  said : 

"Howdy,  old  man.  I  have  no  work  for 
you  to-day."  Then  she  turned  and  began  to 
pull  down  the  dead  Madeira  vines  that  were 
still  clinging  to  the  strings  on  which  they  had 
run  so  bravely  in  the  summer. 

"  Lor',  Miss  Sally !  you  can't  fool  ole  Re- 
mus," exclaimed  the  old  man,  laughing. 


256         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  Did  you  say  you  knew  old  Remus  ?  "  the 
lady  asked  quite  seriously.  "  He  was  a  great 
deal  older  than  you  are,  and  I  expect  he  's 
dead  by  this  time.  Until  I  saw  the  hoe  in 
your  hand  I  thought  you  were  Remus  him- 
self. He  always  carried  a  bag  instead  of  a 
hoe,  and  he  never  went  in  anybody's  yard 
that  he  did  n't  come  out  with  his  bag  full  of 
victuals.  When  you  get  as  old  as  Remus 
was,  you  '11  be  better  off  by  going  to  the  poor- 
house." 

The  lady  talked  so  seriously  that  the  smile 
died  away  on  the  old  man's  face,  and  before 
he  could  say  anything  she  had  gone  into  the 
house  humming  a  tune.  Uncle  Remus  stood 
scratching  his  head  and  reflecting,  and  then 
he  went  slowly  around  the  house,  and  took  a 
seat  on  the  edge  of  the  passage-way  that  led 
from  the  kitchen  to  the  back  porch.  The 
cook,  who  had  been  living  on  the  place  during 
the  lady's  absence,  was  busy  cleaning  up. 

"  Chlory,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  is  you 
notice  Miss  Sally  right  close  sence  she  come 
back?" 

"  I  ain't  got  no  time  ter  watch  white  folks," 
said  the  cook,  who  was  fat  and  high  tem- 
pered. "  What  I  wanter  be  watchin'  Miss 
Sally  fer?" 


UNCLE  REMUS  FINDS  A  SNAKE.  257 

a  I  des  ax  you,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  with  a 
sigh.  He  had  heard  the  blinds  of  the  dining- 
room  window  rattle,  and  he  knew  his  Miss 
Sally  was  listening.  "  I  des  ax  you,"  he  re- 
peated in  a  louder  tone.  "  She  wuz  standin' 
out  yander  in  de  front  er  de  house  des  now, 
en  I  axed  her  howdy,  en  she  sorter  roll  her 
eye,  she  did,  en  'low  dat  I  wuz  dead." 

"  Hush,  man  !  "  exclaimed  the  cook,  coming 
to  the  kitchen  door,  and  looking  at  Uncle 
Remus  in  astonishment. 

"  Dat  'zackly  what  she  say,"  said  the  old 
man,  with  due  solemnity.  "  'T  ain't  so  much 
what  she  say,"  he  went  on,  "  ez  de  way  she 
do.  I  bin  knowin'  Miss  Sally  ev'y  sence  she 
wuz  a  suckin'  baby,  and  I  ain't  never  is  see 
her  show  de  white  er  her  eye  like  she  done 
des  now." 

"  I  say  it !  "  exclaimed  the  cook. 

"  Yassum,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  with  in- 
creased solemnity,  "  she  stood  dar,  she  did,  en 
look  like  she  dazed.  I  des  bin  runnin'  over 
in  my  min'  ef  any  er  de  fambly  bin  'flicted  dat 
away,  en  de  nighest  I  kin  come  at  it  is  dat 
Miss  Sally  gran'ma,  she  had  a  full  blood  br'er 
what  married  a  'oman  dat  showed  de  white  er 
her  eye,  en  dat  'oman  she  had  ter  be  put  in  a 
straight  jacket." 


258         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  Well !  well !  well !  "  exclaimed  the  cook. 
«  You  sho'ly  don't  tell  me  !  " 

Before  Uncle  Remus  could  make  any  reply, 
there  was  a  swish  of  a  dress  on  the  back  porch 
and  a  rattling  of  keys.  Then  a  sharp,  angry 
voice  called  out :  — 

"  Remus,  are  you  going  to  clean  up  that 
yard  ?  If  you  are  not,  I  want  you  to  get  off 
this  lot!" 

"  Yassum,  Miss  Sally,"  exclaimed  Uncle 
Remus,  as  he  seized  his  hoe;  "I  des  gittin' 
me  a  drink  er  water." 

With  that,  the  old  man  began  his  attack  on 
the  grass  and  weeds  in  the  yard,  and  the  lady 
sat  at  a  window  where  she  could  watch  him. 
She  was  not  long  in  observing  that  he  was  in 
no  special  hurry.  He  would  grub  away  for  a 
few  minutes,  and  then  lean  on  the  handle  of 
his  hoe  and  rest.  Frequently,  he  would  turn 
his  hoe  around,  examine  the  blade  of  it,  and 
shake  his  head.  He  seemed  to  get  on  with 
his  work  so  slowly  that  the  lady  put  on  her 
sun-bonnet  and  went  out  to  oversee  the  job. 
For  an  hour  she  kept  the  old  man  very  busy, 
and  he  grew  tired  of  it.  She  was  not  in  the 
habit  of  following  him  up  so  closely.  Finally, 
when  he  saw  that  she  intended  to  see  the  yard 


UNCLE  EEMUS  FINDS  A  SNAKE.  259 

cleaned  then  and  there,  Uncle  Remus  raised 
his  head  and  looked  all  around,  sniffing  the 
air. 

"  What  is  the  matter  now  ?  "  the  lady- 
asked. 

Uncle  Remus  made  no  reply  to  the  question, 
but  continued  sniffing  the  air,  looking  very 
serious.  Presently  he  said  in  a  very  loud  and 
emphatic  tone :  — 

"  I  wonder  wharbouts  is  dat  snake  what  I 
bin  interferin  wid  ?  " 

"What  are  you  talking  about?"  the  lady 
asked  contemptuously. 

"  'Bout  dat  ar  snake  what  I  smells.  I  kin 
allers  smell  um  when  dey  gits  stirred  up." 

"  What  snake? "  asked  the  lady  with  some- 
thing more  than  curiosity. 

"  Dat  ar  snake  what  I  bin  interferin'  wid. 
He  some'rs  closte  'roun'  here,  sho." 

"Where?"  asked  the  lady,  instinctively- 
grasping  her  skirts. 

"  Miss  Sally,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  in  the 
most  business-like  way,  "  I  wish  you  'd  please, 
ma'm,  be  so  good  ez  ter  look  in  dat  bunch  er 
grass  dar.  He  smell  so  rank  he  bleedz  ter 
be  right  'roun'  here." 

Instead  of  searching  in  the  bunch  of  grass, 


260         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"Miss  Sally"  jerked  up  her  skirts,  gave  a 
little  scream,  and  ran  to  the  house  like  a  deer. 
Safe  on  the  back  porch,  she  turned  and  looked 
at  Uncle  Eemus.  The  old  man  was  half  bent, 
and  his  head  was  going  from  side  to  side. 
He  pretended  to  be  searching  for  the  snake, 
but  his  Miss  Sally  knew  that  he  was  laughing 
at  her.  Angry  as  she  was,  she  interfered 
with  Uncle  Remus  no  more,  but  left  him  to 
clean  the  yard  in  his  own  way  and  in  his  own 
time. 


VIII. 

UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  COMET. 

"  You  all  folks  may  be  a  havin'  a  mighty 
good  time,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  rubbing  the 
back  of  his  head  against  the  door  facing, 
"  but  I  let  you  know  dis  ain't  no  wedder  fer 
no  picnics.  I  'm  a-talkin'  now ;  I  'm  a-flingin' 
de  essent  er  de  truf  at  you." 

"  Why,  what  has  come  over  you  ?  "  said  the 
society  editor,  pausing  in  the  middle  of  an 
announcement  relating  to  Miss  Smithkins,  of 
Smithkinsville. 

"  Well,  I  des  tell  you  w'at,"  said  Uncle  Re- 
mus, "  I  bin  mighty  mizerbul,  en  I  ain't  no 
better  now.  Look  like  ter  me  hit  gits  wuss. 
Ef  I  stays  at  home,  I  feels  lonesome ;  en  ef  I 
goes  ter  chu'ch,  I  gits  stirred  up ;  en  ef  I  loafs 
'roun'  town,  I  years  bad  news.  T'er  night  I 
say  ter  myse'f ,  I  did,  i  Remus,  you  ole  rap- 
scallion you,  you  better  go  down  dar  whar  Brer 
John  Henry  preaching  dat  w'at  you  better  do. 
You  better  go  down  dar  en  year  'im  sco'  de 


262         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

sinners.  Wid  dat,  I  tuck  my  foot  in  my  han' 
en  I  put  out,  en  w'en  I  git  dar,  de  house  uz 
full,  en  dey  wuz  all  a  settin'  dar  des  ez  ca'm, 
en  des  ez  cole  blooded  ez  mud-cats  in  de  mont' 
er  Jinerwary.  W'en  I  walk  in,  dey  all  cas' 
der  eyes  on  me,  en  dey  keep  on  a-lookin'  at  me? 
twel  bimeby  I  say  ter  myse'f,  I  did,  "  Bless 
yo'  soul,  childun,  I  '11  des  'bout  show  you  who 
I  is,  en  whar  I  come  fum,  en  I  des  rar'd  my 
head  back  en  I  lit  on  ter  dat  ole  time  chune : 

4  Come  along,  true  believer,  come  along, 
And  walk  in  de  heVmly  way  — 
1  rastle  wid  Jacob  all  night,  all  night, 
I  rastle  wid  Jacob  all  day ! ' 

"  You  ain't  year  me  sing,  is  you,  Boss  ? 
Well,  bless  yo'  soul,  I  shuck  dem  niggers  up, 
en  de  fus'  news  you  know  I  had  urn  swayin' 
backards  en  f orrerds,  same  like  I  had  um  on 
a  string.  I  des  natally  hetted  um  up.  Den  I 
sorter  ease  down,  and  Brer  John  Henry,  he  riz 
en  begin  for  ter  preach.  I  lay  back,  I  did,  f er 
to  'joy  myse'f,  en  I  ain't  mo'n  doze  off  'fo'  he 
begin  fer  ter  tetch  on  de  comic." 

"  On  the  what  ?  "  the  society  editor  asked. 

"  On  de  comic  —  dis  yer  stair  w'at  shows 
up  'fo'  day  wid  'er  back  hair  down.  I  done 
got  my  'spishuns  er  dat  comic,  and  Brer  John 


UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  COMET.  263 

Henry  ain't  no  sooner  totch  on  'er,  dan  I  pick* 
up  my  hat,  I  did,  en  makes  fer  home.  Brer 
John  Henry  done  sont  me  wud  dat  he  gwine 
fetch  me  up  at  confunce,  kaze  I  vi'late  de 
'ciplin',  but  I  done  got  too  ole  en  settle  fer  to 
squat  down  en  year  deze  yer  preacher  mens 
take  der  texes  on  de  comic.  Is  you  seen  'er 
yit,  Boss?" 

"  No,  not  yet." 

"  She  's  a  sight,  mon  !  She  look  lak  she 
done  drap  loose  fum  some'rs  en  lef  a  streak 
er  fier  behime  'er  ez  big  ez  er  omlybus  en  long 
ez  a  freight  train  ;  en,  honey,  she 's  des  a  cally- 
hootin'." 

"  It  is  more  than  probable,"  said  the  political 
editor,  "  that  if  we  don't  bother  the  comet,  the 
comet  won't  bother  us." 

"  Dey  mought  be  mo'  dan  one  proberbul," 
Uncle  Remus  replied,  "  but,  chile,  don't  you 
fret ;  I  ain't  gwine  nigh  dat  comic  —  dat  I 
ain't.  De  furder  off  w'at  she  is  de  mo'  better 
I  feels.  Ef  no  comic  don't  come  a-huntin' 
atter  me,  I  ain't  gwine  huntin'  atter  no  comic 
—  now  you  kin  des  mark  dat  down  wid  de 
p'int  er  yo'  scissors. 

"  Wat  pesters  me,"  continued  Uncle  Remus 
in  a  troubled  tone,    "is  de  way  Miss  Sally 


264         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

gwine  on.  Bless  gracious !  I  can't  git  in  sight 
er  de  house  widout  Miss  Sally  come  a-hollerin' : 
4  Remus  !  Oh,  Remus  !  Man  done  fin'  n'er 
comic.  Yer  de  'count  right  in  de  paper.'  Ef 
I  ain't  forgit  some,  deyer  mo'n  'lev'm  un  um 
right  now  in  de  Nunited  States,  en  deyer  all 
a-makin'  f er  Atlanta,  Georgy.  I  ax  Mars  John 
'bout  it,  en  he  hoot  at  me,  but  Miss  Sally  she 
say  ef  I  don't  b'leeve  w'at  she  say,  I  kin  des 
git  up  'fo'  day  and  look  todes  sunrise,  en, 
bless  gracious !  dar  wuz  de  comic  right  at  me. 
De  way  I  puts  it  down  is  dat  Miss  Sally  got 
mo'  sense  dan  me  en  Mars  John  bofe  put  ter- 
gedder. 

"  Hit  look  like,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  after  a 
little  pause,  "  hit  look  like  dey  can't  be  no  mo' 
'leckshuns  'roun'  in  deze  naborhoods  'cepin' 
dey's  a  comic  hung  up  in  de  elements.  I 
dunner  w'at  kinder  sign  dat  is,  but  dar  she  is. 
Miss  Sally,  she  talk  politics  at  me  eve'y  time 
she  gimme  a  plate  er  vittles,  but  I  mos'  fear'd 
fer  ter  go  up  dar  en  slip  in  my  ballots.  Eve'y 
time  I  year  talk  er  'leckshun,  den  I  year  talk 
er  comics.  Las'  year,  year  'fo'  las',  en  now 
dish  year.  Up  dey  comes  an'  dar  dey  hangs. 
Some  you  kin  see,  en  some  you  can't,  but  you 
kin  year  tell  er  all  un  um.     Dey  comes  up  en 


UNCLE  REMUS  AND  THE  COMET.  265 

dey  looks  at  us  en  den  dey  goes  a-sailin'  off. 
Whar  dey  comes  fum  en  whar  dey  goes  ter,  I 
be  bless  ef  I  know ;  but  w'at  do  dey  come  f er 
eve'y  time  dey 's  a  'leckshun  up  ?  Dat  w'at  I 
wanter  know.  Sho  ez  youer  settin'  dar,  hit 's 
mighty  quare  dat  a  cullud  man  can't  go  en 
cas'  his  ballots  widout  dey  's  a  comic  a-settin' 
up  a-watehin'  'im.  I  ain't  skeered,"  continued 
Uncle  Remus,  moving  towards  the  door,  "  but 
I  'm  gwine  to  keep  one  eye  on  Miss  Sally  an' 
te'r  one  on  de  comic,  an'  w'en  Miss  Sally  starts 
in  f er  ter  pack  up,  den  I  'm  gwineter  go  wid 
'er,  kaze  w'en  dey  done  fool  all  de  yuther 
folks,  de  day  ain't  gwineter  come  w'en  dey 
fool  Miss  Sally." 


IX. 

SOME  ADVICE  TO  A  COLORED  BROTHER. 

Uncle  Remus  had  been  in  the  court-house 
to  see  a  gentleman,  for  whom  he  does  little 
odds  and  ends  of  work.  As  he  came  out  he 
saw,  standing  on  the  stone  steps,  a  stylishly 
dressed  negro  man.  He  had  on  a  shining 
beaver,  a  heavy  watch-chain  ran  across  his  vest 
"  like  de  sun,  moon,  an'  stars  tied  togedder," 
as  the  old  man  described  it  afterwards,  and  a 
silver-headed  cane  was  tucked  under  his  arm. 
Altogether,  he  presented  such  an  imposing 
appearance  that  Uncle  Remus  paused  to  take 
an  inventory  of  him.  The  old  man  has  fogy 
notions,  especially  in  regard  to  colored  people, 
and  to  some  of  the  "  new  issue,"  as  he  calls 
them,  he  is  known  as  "  a  white-folks'  nigger," 
which,  in  the  kitchen,  is  intended  to  be  a  term 
of  very  severe  reproach. 

Perceiving  that  Uncle  Remus  was  eying 
him  rather  closely,  the  negro  straightened  him- 
self up  and  gave  a  military  salute. 


SOME  ADVICE  TO  A  COLORED  BROTHER.    267 

Ignoring  the  salutation,  Uncle  Remus  in- 
quired, u  What  mought  yo'  name  be  ?  "  His 
tone  was  bland  and  insinuating. 

"  My  name,  suh,  is  William  Henry  Haddem, 
de  worl'  'roun'." 

"  William  Henry  Haddem  ?  "  said  Uncle 
Remus,  rubbing  his  head,  and  eying  the  negro 
curiously. 

"  Yes,  suh,  de  worl'  'roun'." 

"  I  'm  mighty  glad  ter  hear  dat,"  said  Uncle 
Remus,  with  the  affectation  of  enthusiasm; 
"  kaze  some  er  deze  here  highfalutin'  niggers 
is  name  William  Henry  on  one  side  er  town 
en  John  Jeems  on  t'er  side.  Yasser  !  right  in 
dish  yer  town,  let  'lone  de  'roun'  worl'." 

"  Well,  suh,"  said  William  Henry,  "  wher- 
ever you  go  you  '11  find  dat  I  am  name  Wil- 
liam Henry  Haddem.  Could  you  be  so  kind, 
suh,  ez  to  tell  me  where  de  gran'  jury  is 
settin'  at?" 

"  What  you  gwine  do  wid  de  gran'  jury  ?  " 
inquired  Uncle  Remus,  with  some  show  of 
solicitude. 

"  Dey  want  me,"  said  William  Henry.  "  Dey 
done  summons  me  ter  come  before  urn." 

"What  dey  want  wid  you?"  Uncle  Remus 
asked. 


268         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  Witness/'  said  the  other,  drawing  himself 
up.  "  I  bin  robbed  right  in  de  public  street ; 
dey  jumped  on  me  and  took  my  money  £um 
me  right  before  my  own  eyes,  and  I  'm  gwine 
up  and  tell  de  gran'  jury  all  about  it." 

"  When  dey  tuck  en  rob  you,"  said  Uncle 
Remus,  "  how  much  did  dey  git  ?  " 

"  Sev'mty-five  dollars,"  said  William  Henry. 

"  Wuz  de  money  all  yone  ? "  asked  Uncle 
Remus,  showing  no  surprise. 

"  All  exceptin'  of  sev'mty  dollars,"  replied 
William  Henry. 

"  Ah-yi !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus.  "  En 
who  is  de  sev'mty  dollars  belong  ter  ?  " 

"  It  belong  to  de  Jacob's  Ladder  Serciety," 
said  William  Henry. 

"  Dar  now  !  "  cried  Uncle  Remus. 

"Yes,  suh,"  said  William  Henry.  "If  it 
had  been  my  money,  I  would  n't  worry  about 
it,  but  I  'm  de  treasurer  ov  de  Jacob's  Ladder 
Serciety,  and  I  feels  in  juty  bound  to  make  a 
riffle  and  try  ter  git  de  money  back." 

"  Des  so  !  "  said  the  old  man. 

"  Yes,  suh,"  William  'Henry  went  on,  grow- 
ing more  confidential.  "  I  wuz  walkin'  along 
with  my  hands  in  my  pockets,  when  two  men 
jumped  on  me  and  got  me  down,  and  when  I 


SOME  ADVICE  TO  A  COLORED  BROTHER.    269 

got  up  frum   dar   I  wuz  perfectly  nickleless. 
Yes,  suh  !  perfectly  nickleless." 

"  Den  what  de  Jacob  Lathers  say  ?  "  in- 
quired Uncle  Remus. 

"  Dey  ain't  held  no  meetin'  sence,"  said 
William  Henry.  "  Ef  de  gran'  jury  will  do 
dere  juty,  I  '11  git  de  money  back  befo'  de 
serciety  meets." 

"  What  you  say  yo'  name  mought  be  ?  " 
said  Uncle  Remus,  shifting  the  weight  of  his 
body  from  one  leg  to  the  other. 

"  William  Henry  Haddem." 

"  Tooby  sho',"  said  the  old  man,  "  Haddem 
had  um,  an  now  he  ain't  got  um.  Is  you  bin 
foolin'  'roun'  deze  here  gran'  juries  en  cote- 
houses  much  ?  " 

"  No,  suh,"  said  William  Henry. 

"So  fur,  so  good,"  said  Uncle  Remus. 
"  You  see  deze  here  steps,  and  dat  dar  door 
dar?  Well,  dey  leads  right  straight  to  de 
chain-gang.  I  bin  see  niggers  go  in  dar 
lookin'  mighty  nigh  ez  big  en  ez  slick  ez  what 
you  is,  en  when  dey  come  out,  dey  mos'  in- 
giner'ly  got  somebody  wid  um  fer  to  p'int  out 
de  way  ter  de  rock-pile.  Dem  white  folks 
waitin'  fer  you  right  now.  Ef  you  go  in  dar, 
foa  ruffle  up  dat  hat  so  she  won't  shine,  and 


270         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

hide  dat  ar  watch-chain  whar  dey  can't  see  it, 
en  den  when  you  git  in  dar  you  up  en  tell  um 
dat  you  done  fergit  'bout  de  circumstance  er 
bein'  robbed,  en  dat  you  speck  you  los'  dat 
money  som'ers  in  de  big  road.  En  den  when 
you  come  out'n  dar,  ef  you  come  out  widout 
any  han'cuffs  on  you,  you  des  take  yo'  foot 
in  yo'  han'  en  go  swap  de  watch-chain  fer  one 
er  dem  ar  long  railroad  tickets  what  look  like 
it  got  j'ints  in  it.     You  hear  me  talkin' ! " 

William  Henry  Haddem  gazed  at  Uncle 
Remus  in  astonishment.  He  looked  at  his 
watch-chain,  examined  his  hat,  and  seemed  to 
be  somewhat  uneasy. 

"  What  de  Jacob's  Ladder  Serciety  gwine 
ter  do  ?  "  he  asked. 

"  Gi'  um  back  der  money  !  "  exclaimed  Un- 
cle Remus ;  "  gi'  um  back  der  money  !  Don't 
you  dast  ter  go  in  dar  en  tell  dem  ar  white 
folks  de  tale  you  bin  tellin'  me!" 

With  that  the  old  man  went  on  his  way. 
He  looked  back  as  he  was  turning  a  corner 
some  distance  away,  and  saw  William  Henry 
Haddem  still  standing  where  he  had  left  him. 


PREACHING  THAT  IS  PREACHING,  AND  UNCLE 
REMUs's  COMMENTS  ON  IT. 

In  a  little  town  not  far  from  Atlanta  there 
has  been  a  controversy  going  on  between  the 
Methodists  and  the  Baptists.  It  has  been  a 
hot  affair  from  beginning  to  end,  and,  as  is 
usual  in  such  cases,  the  bad  feeling  developed 
has  spread  for  miles  around  among  those  who 
believe  that  a  human  creed  is  more  important 
than  religion  itself ;  and  this  feeling  has  ex- 
tended to  the  negroes,  though  the  bitterness 
is  somewhat  mitigated  by  the  good  humor 
and  the  accommodating  nature  of  the  negro 
character. 

An  echo  of  this  controversy  was  heard  one 
Sunday  morning  recently,  in  the  kitchen  of 
the  lady  to  whose  family  Uncle  Remus  used 
to  belong. 

It  was  participated  in  by  the  old  man, 
Chloe,  the  cook,  and  Aunt  Mirny,  a  colored 
lady  who  had  once  reigned  in  Chloe's  place, 


272         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

and  who  was  secretly  anxious  to  get  back 
again.  Uncle  Remus  was  sitting  near  the 
stove,  his  elbows  on  his  knees  and  his  hands 
spread  out  to  catch  the  warmth ;  Aunt  Mirny 
was  sitting  in  a  corner  bolt  upright,  stiff  and 
uncompromising,  while  Chloe  was  bustling 
around  preparing  dinner. 

"Sis  Chlory,"  said  Aunt  Mirny,  "is  you 
gwine  ter  church  dis  evenin'  ?  " 

"  Law,  chile !  don't  ax  me  dat,"  replied 
Chloe  with  a  sigh.  "  Time  I  git  thoo  wid 
dish  yer  dinner,  I  '11  be  mighty  willin'  ter  set 
down  an'  rest,  I  'speck." 

"  Dat 's  so,"  said  Aunt  Mirny,  sympatheti- 
cally. "  I  done  bin  dar  myse'f .  I  know  des 
'zackly  how 't  is.  When  you  cook  f er  white 
folks,  you  got  ter  be  on  yo'  feet  all  day  long, 
an'  you  may  thank  yo'  stars  ef  you  ain't  on 
yo'  head  half  de  time." 

"Dat  cert'ny  is  de  trufe,"  cried  Chloe0 
"  Dey  ain't  nothin'  would  suit  me  better  dan 
ter  go  ter  church  dis  evenin'  an'  hear  um  talk 
'bout  babtizin'  an'  sprinklin'.  De  white  folks 
bin  swappin'  some  rank  talk  'bout  which  de 
bes',  Methodis'  er  de  Babtis',  an'  now  I  'speck 
de  colored  folks  gwine  do  some  quoilin'  'bout 
it.     An'  I  don't  keer  ef  dey  does,  kaze  Brer 


PREACHING  THAT  IS  PREACHING.         273 

John  Henry  'low  dat  hit  's  better  ter  quoil 
'bout  de  docterin'  er  de  sperrit  dan  ter  git  in- 
stignated  wid  de  flesh.  He  say  dem  ve'y 
words,  an'  he  's  a  preacher,  mon,  ef  dey  ever 
wuz  one.  What  church  does  you  b'long  ter, 
Sis  Mirny?" 

"  Babtis' !  "  exclaimed  Aunt  Mirny,  emphati- 
cally. "  Brer  Zeke  Simmons,  he  'low  I  'm  a 
fightin'  Baptis'  ef  dey  ever  bin  any.  I  done 
got  de  word ;  I  knows  what  I  'm  a-doin'." 

"  Ah-yi !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus  with 
affected  enthusiasm,  knowing  that  Chloe  was 
a  Methodist. 

"  Yes,  Lord  !  "  Aunt  Mirny  went  on,  clos- 
ing her  eyes  in  a  self-satisfied  way.  "  I  bin 
a-stumblin'  'long  a  mighty  long  time.  I  bin  a 
Tiscopal  Meth'dis',  an'  I  bin  a  Afiikin  Meth'- 
dis',  an'  I  bin  a  Pottistant  Meth'dis',  an'  I  bin 
a  Pesberteen.  All  dat  time  I  wuz  oneazy  — 
all  dat  time  I  wuz  restless  in  de  min'.  I  laid 
'wake  nights  an'  I  ain't  had  no  appetite.  I 
wuz  dat  worried  dat  I  could  n't  set  still.  One 
night  I  wuz  layin'  in  bed,  an'  it  look  like 
eve'ything  cle'r'd  up.  I  said  out  loud,  '  I  'm 
gwine  ter  be  a  Babtis'.'  I  lay  dar,  I  did,  an' 
I  felt  des  as  ca'm  ez  ca'm  could  be.  I  say  out 
loud,    'Is  I   right?'     Sump'n   answer   back, 


274         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

4  Rise,  sinner,  yo'  sins  is  done  forgive ! '  I  lay 
dar  a  little  while,  an'  de  same  sump'n  say,  '  Go 
show  de  worl'  what  Jesus  give  you  ! '  Mon,  I 
riz  fum  dar  a-shoutin',  an'  I  bin  a-feelin'  like 
shoutin'  ever  sence." 

Uncle  Remus  shook  his  head  solemnly.,  but 
said  nothing,  and  there  was  a  pause. 

"Well,"  said  Chloe  after  awhile,  "I  tell 
you  how  I  is  —  I  'm  a  born  Meth'dis'.  Dem 
what  wants  ter  be  babtize  kin  go  git  babtize, 
an'  dem  what  wants  ter  be  sprinkled  can  git 
sprinkled.  I  'm  a  sprinkler  myse'f ;  and  I 
ain't  los'  no  sleep  on  de  'count  uv  it,  an'  I 
ain't  gwine  ter  lose  none.  I  'm  des  a  plain 
Meth'dis'.  Dem  what  got  so  many  sins  on 
um  dat  dey  hatter  git  souzed  under  de  water 
had  better  go  splunge  right  in,  an'  dey 
oughtn'  ter  lose  no  time  needer.    Dat 's  what." 

Uncle  Remus,  seeing  that  a  fuss  was  immi- 
nent, straightened  up. 

"  You  two  niggers  hush  up !  Miss  Sally 
may  be  gone  ter  church,  but  Mars  John  ain't, 
en  ef  he  hear  you  all  gwine  on  dat  way,  he  '11 
jump  out'n  dat  hall  do'  wid  his  night-gown 
on  en  tarrify  you,  mon." 

"Wuz  we  talkin'  loud?"  asked  Aunt 
Mirny. 


PREACHING  THAT  IS  PREACHING.         275 

"  Des  a-holl'in',"  said  Uncle  Remus  indig- 
nantly. "  What  you  all  want  ter  be  quoilin' 
in  white  folks'  kitchen  fer?  Go  out  yander 
in  de  ol'  fiel',  en  pull  ha'r  en  paw  up  de  yeth, 
but  don't  come  cuttin'  up  'roun'  here.  What 
kinder  'ligion  you  call  dat,  whar  dey  scratch 
en  bite  en  kick  en  squall?  Ef  dat  de  kind 
you  got,  all  de  water  in  de  Atlanta  Ocean 
won't  save  na'er  one  un  you.  I  hear  Mars 
John  trompin'  'roun'  in  dar  now." 

"What  we  doin',  man?"  exclaimed  Aunt 
Mirny,  lowering  her  voice.  "  We  ain't  doin' 
nothin'  but  talkin'  'bout  preachin'.  Sis 
Chlory,  ef  you  think  yo'  '11  go  dis  evenin',  I  '11 
call  back  atter  you." 

"  Oh,  I  speck  I  '11  go,"  said  Chloe.  "  I  '11 
be  wo'  out,'  but  Sunday  ain't  no  Sunday  wid 
me,  less'n  I  goes  some'rs  whar  dey  's  preachin' 
an'  gwine  on.  Ef  we  er  gwine,  less  go  whar 
dey 's  sho'  nuff  preachin'." 

"  Dat 's  what  I  say,"  Aunt  Mimy  assented. 
ff  Law,  honey  !  We  oughter  go  'cross  town  an' 
hear  Brer  Dave  Varner.  Some  er  deze  preach- 
ers des  gits  up  in  de  pullypit  dar  an'  stan's 
right  still  an'  talks  —  look  like  dey  ain't  got 
no  life  in  um.  Dat  ain't  de  way  wid  Brer 
Dave  Varner.     Gentermens !    he  des  gits  up 


276         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

dar  an'  talks  in  about  ez  much  wid  his  han's 
an'  foots  ez  he  do  wid  his  mouf .  I  tell  you 
de  trufe,  Brer  Dave  Yarner  dunno  a  blessed 
thing  what  he  doin'.  I  done  hear  him  sesso. 
He  work  his  foots,  he  work  his  body,  and  he 
hoi'  his  han's  des  so." 

Aunt  Mirny  had  left  her  chair  and  was 
standing  out  in  the  floor,  in  order  to  give 
Brother  Dave  Varner's  favorite  attitude.  Her 
head  was  thrown  back,  there  was  an  ecstatic 
smile  on  her  face,  and  her  hands  were  clasped 
together  in  the  air.  Uncle  Remus  looked  at 
her  curiously. 

"Den,"  Aunt  Mirny  continued,  "he  work 
his  arms  an'  swing  his  body  dis  away,"  —  suit- 
ing the  action  to  the  word.  "  Man,  sir  !  it 
make  me  feel  right  ticklish.  Sis  Hannah 
Simpson  wuz  settin'  dar  lis'nen  at  'im  one 
night,  an'  she  lipt  up  in  de  a'r  an'  holler 
1  Glory ! '  an'  fell  back  like  she  uz  dead.  Brer 
Dave,  he  seed  'er  fall,  but  he  ain't  stop;  he 
des  keep  right  on,  an'  Sis  Hannah  she  lay  dar 
intranced,  an'  when  she  come  back  ter  life  she 
say  she  done  bin  ter  glory  whar  she  kin  look 
back  an'  see  de  sev'mty  an'  sev'm  creeturs  wid 
fier-balls  fer  eyes  a-grabbin'  an'  a-pullin'  at  de 
po'  sinners.     'Ceppin'  fer  de  dus'  de  mo'ners 


PREACHING  THAT  IS  PREACHING.         277 

kicked  up,  I  ain't  had  no  better  time  at  no 
church." 

Uncle  Remus  looked  at  Aunt  Mirny  again 
as  she  paused  for  want  of  breath. 

"  How  you  say  dat  Dave  Varner  do  whiles 
he  preachin'  ? "  the  old  man  asked.  Aunt 
Mirny  went  through  the  performance  again 
with  characteristic  vigor,  clasping  her  hands 
over  her  head,  swinging  her  arms,  and  sway- 
ing her  body  from  side  to  side.  It  was  an 
impressive  pantomime. 

"  When  he  do  dat  away,"  said  Uncle  Remus, 
solemnly,  "  he  a-practicin'.  Dat  'zackly  what 
he  doin'." 

"Practicin'  what?"  asked  Chloe. 

"Ain't  you  got  no  eyes,  'oman ? "  asked 
Uncle  Remus  scornfully.  "  Don't  yo'  sev'm 
senses  tell  you  what  he  practicin'  f er  ?  When 
he  reach  up  his  han's  an'  jine  um  in  de  air, 
he  's  a-reachin'  fer  one  er  deze  lank-shank 
pullets  like  Miss  Sally  got  here ;  en  when  he 
swing  his  arms  en  sway  his  body,  he  's  des 
a-gittin'  'way  fum  de  hen-roos'."  Uncle 
Remus  carried  his  illustration  so  far  that  he, 
himself,  went  out  of  the  kitchen,  shaking  his 
arms  and  swaying  his  body. 

"Well!"    exclaimed   Aunt  Mirny,  with  a 


278         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

snort.  "  Ain't  dat  too  much  ?  An'  Brer 
Dave  Varner  a  preacher,  too !  I  tell  you, 
honey,  dat  ole  Remus  is  a  scan'lous  villyun. 
Deze  yer  white  folks  done  sp'ilt  'im." 

"  He  sp'iles  dem  wuss'n  dey  sp'iles  him," 
said  Chloe,  angrily,  "a-gwine  'roun'  here 
a-Mars'n  an'  a  Miss'n  uv  urn." 

"  I  'm  gwine,"  said  Aunt  Mirny.  "  I  ain't 
gwine  ter  stay  whar  he  is.  Come  by,  ef  you 
kin,  an'  come  soon.  It 's  a  long  ways  'cross 
town  yander." 


XI. 

CALLED  TO  ACCOUNT  BY  THE  PREACHER, 

Uncle  Remus's  remarks  about  the  Rev. 
David  Varner,  which  have  already  been  re- 
ported, went  further,  perhaps,  then  he  in- 
tended they  should  go,  though  this  is  merely 
surmise,  for  the  old  man  had  acquired  some- 
thing of  the  independence  and  fearlessness  of 
the  family  with  which  his  lot  had  been  cast 
in  slavery  times.  At  any  rate,  Aunt  Mirny, 
thinking  to  prove  to  her  preacher  that  she  was 
his  most  zealous  defender,  took  occasion  to  tell 
him  at  the  first  opportunity  what  Uncle  Re- 
mus had  said  about  him. 

The  Rev.  David  Varner  listened  with  a 
frown,  and  although  he  said  nothing  in  re- 
sponse, his  very  silence  was  threatening.  In 
her  enthusiasm,  Aunt  Mirny  greatly  exagger- 
ated what  Uncle  Remus  had  really  said,  and 
such  was  her  volubility  that  Chloe,  who  had 
accompanied  her  to  church,  found  it  impos- 
sible to  enter  a  protest  or  to  make  an  explana- 
tion. 


280         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

Rev.  David  Varner  took  off  his  hat  and 
smoothed  his  wrinkled  brow  with  a  large  red 
silk  handkerchief.  He  was  tall  and  not  un- 
handsome, being  a  dark  mulatto.  He  wore  a 
suit  of  shining  black,  and  bore  the  appearance 
of  a  prosperous  preacher  who  is  satisfied  with 
himself  and  his  position.  He  seemed  to  be 
about  forty-five. 

"  And  he  said  dat,  did  he  ?  "  inquired  Rev. 
David  Varner,  smacking  his  lips  ominously. 
"  He  said  dat  I  has  been  stealin'  chickens  ? 
Well,  ma'm,  he  may  be  relowed  to  talk  about 
de  rest  of  de  colored  people  in  dis  communion, 
but  he  shall  not  be  relowed  to  talk  about  me. 
I  '11  show  him,  ma'm,  dat  dere  is  some  colored 
people  he  cannot  slanderize.  I  thank  you 
hearty,  ma'm,  for  bein'  so  good  as  to  remind 
me  of  deze  circumstances." 

"  I  mos'  sorry  I  tole  'im,"  said  Aunt  Mirny, 
watching  the  Rev.  David  Varner  as  he  strut- 
ted off  to  join  another  group  of  his  congrega- 
tion. "  I  skeer'd  he  gwine  ter  beat  ole  Uncle 
Remus  scan'lous." 

"  Law,  honey,  don't  you  fret,"  said  Chloe ; 
"  ole  man  Remus  bin  in  deze  low  groun's  a 
mighty  long  time,  an'  dey  ain't  nobody  bin 
beat  'im  up  yet.  Bless  yo'  soul,  chile  !  you 
dunno  dat  ole  nigger  man." 


CALLED  TO  ACCOUNT  BY  THE  PREACHER.   281 

This  happened  on  the  afternoon  of  the  Sun- 
day on  which  Uncle  Remus  had  criticised 
Aunt  Mirny's  reproduction  of  Rev.  David 
Yarner's  soul-stirring  gestures.  A  few  days 
..iterwards,  as  the  old  man  was  lecturing  a 
crowd  of  idle  negroes  who  were  standing  on 
the  street,  near  his  Miss  Sally's  gate,  the  Rev. 
David  chanced  to  pass  along.  His  pompous 
strut  and  store  clothes  made  him  conspicuous. 
He  paused  in  front  of  Uncle  Remus,  hung 
the  handle  of  his  walking  cane  on  his  left  arm, 
stuck  the  thumb  of  his  right  hand  in  the  arm- 
hole  of  his  vest,  and  stared  at  the  old  man. 

"  And  so  you  is  de  genulmun  dat  been  ex- 
scusin'  me  of  stealin'  chickens,"  he  said  nod- 
ding his  head  most  vigorously,  "  I  'm  truly 
sorry  dat  you  has  to  go  roun'  an'  slanderize 
your  betters,  an'  so  fur  as  I  am  concern,  you 
will  reternally  regret  it." 

Uncle  Remus' s  counternance  was  a  study. 
With  an  indifference  that  was  by  no  means 
assumed,  he  regarded  the  preacher  through 
half -closed  eyes,  and  there  was  a  smile  of  min- 
gled contempt  and  amusement  on  his  face. 

u  Whose  chickens  wuz  dey  ?  "  he  inquired 
in  a  tone  as  bland  as  a  spring  morning,  as  soon 
as  the  preacher  paused. 


1582         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"Dey  was  not  nobody's  chickens/'  ex- 
claimed Rev.  David  Varner,  with  increasing 
indignation,  "an'  I  prepose  to  hold  you  er- 
sponsible  for  de  scandal." 

"What  yo'  name?"  asked  Uncle  Remus 
straightening  himself  up. 

"  Revun  David  Varner,"  exclaimed  the 
other,  "  a  preacher  of  de  reternal  gospel,  an' 
a  'spectable  man." 

"  Well,  I  dunner  what  else  you  mought  be," 
said  Uncle  Remus,  "  but  I  know  mighty  well 
dat  you  ain't  name  David  Varner." 

"  What  is  I  name,  den  ?  "  inquired  the  other 
in  a  somewhat  subdued  tone. 

"  You  er  name  Mose  Waters,"  said  Uncle 
Remus.  "I  know'd  yo'  daddy  in  Jasper 
County,  en  I  bin  knowin'  you  off  en  on  sence 
you  had  yo'  eyes  open.  Ef  you  '11  sneak  aroun' 
en  pick  up  some  un  else's  name,  what  is  dey 
you  won't  pick  up  ?  Now,  I  des  ax  you  dat 
right  here  befo'  deze  folks." 

"  Well,  suh,"  said  the  Reverend  Dave,  to- 
tally unprepared  for  this  turn  of  affairs,  "  in 
rega'd  to  de  name,  it  is  not  what  I  'm  here  to 
talk  erbout." 

"  Well,  let 's  fling  it  in,"  said  Uncle  Remus, 
raising  his  voice  to  an  irritating  pitch.     "  A 


CALLED  TO  ACCOUNT  BY  THE  PREACHER.   283 

man  what  kin  talk  ez  what  dey  sez  you  kin, 
aint  got  no  business  slightin'  his  own  name. 
Now,  I  want  you  ter  tell  me  en  deze  yuther 
folks  how  come  Mose  Waters,  de  name  dat  you 
wuz  borned  inter,  ain't  des  ez  good  ez  Dave' 
Varner.  You  got  de  whole  sidewalk  fer  er 
flatform,  en  you  kin  des  r'ar  back  en  tell  us 
all  you  know  'bout  it." 

"  What  I  come  fer,"  said  the  Rev.  David, 
"  is  to  hoi'  you  ersponsible  fer  diz  'tempt  to 
slanderize  a  minister  of  de  reternal  gospel 
what  have  been  call  to  preach  de  word." 

"  Nigger !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus,  going 
a  little  closer  to  the  preacher,  "  you  done  change 
yo'  name,  en  I  '11  change  yo'  complexion.  I 
des  dar'  you  ter  squinch  yo'  eye-ball  at  me. 
Ef  you  des  so  much  ez  make  a  Z  at  me,  dey  '11 
hatter  call  de  Black  Maria,  kaze  I  sholy  will 
kill  you.     Now,  go  on  en  hoi'  me  'sponsible." 

Rev.  David  Varner,  seeing  that  Uncle  Re- 
mus was  in  earnest,  remarked  that  he  would 
not  be  so  undignified  as  to  engage  in  a  street 
scuffle,  and  went  strutting  down  the   street, 
leaving  Uncle  Remus  singing,  — 

"  'T  is  de  ol'  Black  Maria  backin'  up  ter  yo'  do',  — 
Hello,  Black  Maria,  hello  ! " 


XII. 

UNCLE  REMUs's  EXPERIENCE  WITH   "  HA'NTS." 

One  morning  Uncle  Remus  sat  in  his  Miss 
Sally's  kitchen  with  his  chair  tilted  back  and 
his  head  leaning  against  the  wall.  His  atti- 
tude was  reflective,  though  there  was  a  twinkle 
of  humor  in  his  eyes  as  he  watched  Chloe,  the 
cook,  preparing  to  make  waffles  for  breakfast. 

"I  hear  tell,"  he  said  after  awhile,  "dat 
'tain't  no  use  fer  ter  have  no  cook  in  dis 
house." 

"How  come  dat?"  inquired  Chloe  with 
some  interest. 

"  Ah  Lord,  chile  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus, 
shaking  his  head,  "you  mos'  too  much  fer 
me  when  you  ax  me  dat.  You  know  what  de 
preacher  say :  '  So  is  desso ;  how  come  so  is 
mo'  so.' " 

"  I  ain't  hear  no  preacher  say  dat  yit,"  said 
Chloe,  complacently.  "  Ef  dey  ever  is  say  it, 
dey  done  say  it  long  'fo'  my  time." 

"  I  hear  talk,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  closing 


EXPERIENCE  WITH  "HA' NTS."  285 

his  eyes  and  elevating  his  eyebrows,  "  dat  all 
you  got  ter  do  is  ter  git  you  some  flour  en 
lay  it  dar  in  de  pantry  en  walk  out  back'ards, 
en  de  nex'  mornin',  dar  you  '11  fin'  yo'  light 
bread  done  riz  up  en  baked." 

"  It  don't  do  dat  away  fer  me,"  remarked 
Chloe,  "  e£  it  did,  I  boun'  you  I  'd  feel  mighty 
thankful." 

"Dey  tells  me,"  the  old  man  continued, 
"  dat  'f  o'  me  an'  Miss  Sally  come  here,  de 
whole  place  was  ha'nted." 

"  Oh,  hush,  man  !  "  exclaimed  Chloe,  "  who 
tell  you  dat?" 

"Dem  what  know,"  said  Uncle  Remus, 
solemnly.  "But,  bless  yo'  soul,  honey,  dey 
ain't  had  no  needs  fer  ter  tell  me,  kaze  time  I 
sot  my  foot  on  de  place  I  seed  de  signs.  I 
seed  paths  runnin'  thoo  de  grass  en  no  tracks 
in  um,  en  de  red  spiders  wuz  a-spinnin'  der 
wheels  on  de  front  porch.  Dar  dey  wuz. 
'Roun'  on  de  side  er  de  house  't  wan't  no  bet- 
ter, en  right  out  dar  on  de  back  steps  de 
snails  had  done  writ  der  name  on  de  planks. 
I  know'd  right  den  dat  ha'nts  had  been  pro* 
jikin'  'roun'  dar  in  dem  neighborhoods." 

"  What  you  do  den  ?  "  inquired  Chloe,  af 
Uncle  Remus  paused. 


286         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"S'posin'  dat  had  er  been  you?"  the  old 
man  asked  in  an  argumentative  way. 

"  Man  —  suh !  "  exclaimed  Chloe,  flourishing 
a  dish-rag  wildly  above  her  head,  "  ef  dat  had 
been  me,  I  'd  V  des  riz  an  flew  —  dat  I  would ! 
Ef  you  don't  want  ter  see  human  folks  fly, 
don't  you  put  me  whar  dey's  any  ha'nts. 
Now,  I  des  tell  you  dat !  " 

"  Well,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  I  stood  dar, 
I  did,  en  scratch  my  head.  I  know'd  in 
reason  dat  dem  kinder  doin's  can't  be  put  up 
wid.  Den  it  tuck'n  come  in  my  head  dat  de 
signs  what  I  seed  wan't  sho'  nuff  ha'nt  signs. 
Dar  dey  wuz  plain  ez  day,  but  I  'low  ter  my- 
se'f  dat  maybe  I  done  git  so  ole  en  fibble- 
minded  dat  I  can't  tell  ha'nt  sign  like  I  use- 
ter.  So,  den,  what  I  gwine  do  ?  I  gwine  see 
fer  myse'f ;  I  gwine  come  dar  atter  dark  en 
see  what  kinder  capers  dey  cut  up  'twix'  sun- 
down en  moonrise." 

"  Oh,  go  'way,  man  !  "  exclaimed  Chloe,  with 
unfeigned  astonishment. 

"  Yessum,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  dat  'zackly 
*ie  way  de  idee  struck  me,  en  she  struck  me 
hard,  mon.  I  put  out  fer  home,  en  got  what 
little  scraps  er  vittles  de  ole  'oman  done  save 
up  fer  me.     Some  er  deze  I  made  way  wid 


EXPERIENCE  WITH  "  HA' NTS.'-  287 

den  en  dar,  en  de  yuthers  I  tuck  en  wrop  up 
in  a  little  piece  er  paper  en  put  it  in  my 
pocket.  Den  atter  it  got  dark  good,  I  got 
down  my  hat  en  my  cane,  en  come  back  fer 
ter  see  how  de  Ian'  lay." 

"Well,  I  tell  you  now,"  said  Chloe,  "ef 
dat  had  er  been  me,  I  boun'  you  I  'd  er  been 
gwine  t'other  way." 

"  I  come  back,  I  did,"  the  old  man  contin- 
ued, "  en  sot  out  dar  on  de  front  steps.  De 
grass  wuz  growin'  rank  in  de  yard,  de  front 
gate  wuz  off  de  hinges,  en  de  winder  blin's 
rattled  eve'y  time  de  win'  drawed  a  breff. 
High  ez  de  grass  wuz,  dey  wan't  no  crickets 
a-skreakin'  in  it,  en  dey  want  none  er  deze  yer 
big  night  bugs  a-zoonin'  'roun'.  I  sot  dar,  I 
did,  en  'low  ter  myse'f  dat  I  dunner  how  come 
Mars  John  en  Miss  Sally  want  ter  buy  dish 
yer  place  whar  yuther  folks  'fuse  ter  live." 

"  Dat 's  de  Lord's  trufe !  "  exclaimed  Chloe, 
with  unction.  Uncle  Remus  took  no  notice 
of  the  interruption. 

"  How  long  I  sot  dar  I  ain't  gwine  ter  tell 
you  —  it  mought  er  been  one  hour,  and  it 
mought  er  been  two  ;  I  mought  er  drapped  off 
in  a  doze,  en  I  mought  er  stayed  'wake ;  yit, 
long  er  short,  sleep  er  wake,  de  fust  news  I 


288         BIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

know  I  hear  sump'n  trottin'  'long  on  de  piaz° 
zer  —  dip-dip  —  dip-dip.  I  look  'roun',  I  did, 
en  dough  it  wuz  dark  en  my  eyes  weak,  I  seed 
a  great  big  black  dog  eomin'  to'rds  me.  Des 
'bout  dat  time  it  seem  like  de  dog  seed  me,  en 
he  stop  en  look  at  me.  'Fof  I  kin  shoo  at 
'im  wid  my  cane,  he  fetched  a  growl  en  run 
right  at  me.  I  shot  my  eyes  and  hit  at  'im, 
but  dey  want  no  dog  dar.  Dey  wuz  a  sorter 
cracklin'  soun'  like  dry  weeds  a-burnin'  when 
he  lipped  over  my  head." 

"  Ah-ha  !  "  exclaimed  Chloe ;  "  what  he  do 
den?" 

"  Dat  what  been  pesterin'  me,"  said  Uncle 
Remus  solemnly.  "He  lipped  up  in  de  a'r, 
but  he  ain't  never  lit  on  de  groun'.  Hit  des 
like  I  tell  you,"  the  old  man  went  on,  seeing 
that  Chloe  was  speechless  with  astonishment. 
"  De  creetur  lipped  up  in  de  a'r,  but  he  ain't 
never  lit  on  de  groun'." 

" Wan't  you  skeer'd  mighty  nigh  ter  death  ?  " 
exclaimed  Chloe,  dropping  suddenly  in  a  chair. 

"  Dey  ain't  gimme  no  time  fer  ter  git 
skeer'd,"  said  Uncle  Remus.  "  Mos'  'fo'  I 
fine  dat  de  big  dog  done  make  his  disappear- 
ance, I  hear  sump'n  come  'long  de  piazzer 
—  dip-dip  —  dip-dip  —  dip-dip.        I    look 


EXPERIENCE  WITH  "HA'NTS."  289 

'roun',  en  dar  wuz  a  little  black  dog  'lopin' 
'long,  en  time  I  could  shut  my  eye,  he  riz  en 
made  his  disappearance  wid  dat  same  cracklin' 
soun'  like  weeds  a-burnin." 

"  Why  n't  you  break  an'  run  ?  "  cried  Chloe, 
with  some  show  of  indignation. 

"  Shoo  !  "  said  Uncle  Remus.  "  Runnin' 
fum  ha'nts  is  like  dodgin'  a  thunder-clap.  Yit 
I  ain't  a-denyin'  but  what  I  got  up  fum  dar 
en  done  my  level  bes'  f er  ter  f oiler  on  atter  de 
dogs.  Dey  mought  er  made  der  disappearance 
mo'  quicker  dan  what  I  done,  kaze  dey  went 
away  like  blowin'  out  a  light,  but  I  lay  dey 
want  no  mo'  willin'  dan  what  ole  Remus  wuz. 
I  des  tuck  de  nighest  cut  right  'cross  de  front 
yard.  I  'speck  dey  wuz  a  fence  in  de  way, 
kaze  when  I  went  back  dar  nex'  day,  de  palin's 
wuz  strowed  all  'long  de  street,  en  folks  wuz 
stan'in'  'roun'  axin'  one  an'er  ef  dey  hear  dat 
drove  er  hosses  runnin'  away  endurin'  er  de 
night." 

"  Ah-yi !  "  exclaimed  Chloe. 

"  Dat  what  dey  say,"  Uncle  Remus  contin- 
ued. "  I  went  back  in  dar,  I  did,  en  look  all 
'roun',  en  dey  ain't  no  dog  track  in  de  yard. 
Needer  wuz  dey  any  yuther  sign,  'ceppin  whar 
I  struck  de  groun'  one  time  'twix'  de  front 
steps  en  de  fence." 


290         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

«  What  you  do  den  ?  "  asked  Chloe. 

"I  went  right  straight  back  en  tell  Miss 
Sally  'bout  dat  ar  place  bein'  ha'nted.  Miss 
Sally  look  so  quare  she  got  me  flustrated.  I 
bin  knowin'  'er  sence  she  wuz  little  bit  er 
baby,  all  what  she  b'lieve  en  what  she  don't 
b'lieve,  yit  she  sot  in  de  hall  dar  en  stood  me 
down  dat  dey  wan't  no  ha'nts.  Bimeby  I  hear 
Mars  John  stirrin'  'roun'  in  his  room,  en  den 
I  know  how  come  Miss  Sally  gwine  on  dat 
away.  Mars  John,  he  come  out  en  ax  me 
what  is  it,  en  den  he  natally  gimme  Down-de- 
country.  A  little  mo'  en  he  'd  a-cussed.  But 
atter  he  done  gone,  Miss  Sally  come  out  en 
call  me,  en  ax  me  how  I  gwine  ter  run  de 
ha'nts  off.  I  'low  dat  ef  dey  ain't  no  ha'nts, 
't  ain't  no  use  ter  run  um  off.  Den  she  'low  dat 
I  nee'n't  ter  be  a  gump  des  kaze  I  knows  how, 
en  wid  dat  I  tol'  'er  dat  de  way  ter  git  rid  er 
ha'nts  wuz  ter  git  some  prickly-pear  root  en 
bile  it  in  stump-water  en  sprinkle  it  'roun'  de 
yard." 

"  What  Miss  Sally  say  ?  "  asked  Chloe. 

"  She  say,  '  Don't  you  min'  yo'  Mars  John. 
You  go  on  en  run  de  ha'nts  away.  Don't 
stan'  grinnin'  'roun'  here.' " 

"  An'  you  went  ?  "  said  Chloe. 


EXPEBIENCE  WITH  "HANTS."  291 

"I  went,"  said  Uncle  Remus.  "I  went, 
but  I  'speck  I  '11  hatter  go  ag'in.  De  ha'nts 
done  come  back." 

"Oh,  go  'way,  man,"  exclaimed  Chloe. 
"  How  you  know  ?  " 

"Well  'm,  I  '11  tell  you,"  said  the  old  man 
more  solemnly  than  ever.  "  I  wuz  in  here  las' 
night  atter  you  done  gone,  en  I  found  a  basket 
er  vittles  hid  in  de  wood-box  right  dar,  en  I 
knowed  in  reason  de  ha'nts  done  come  back, 
kaze  dey  ain't  nobody  'roun'  here  gwinter  hide 
good  vittles  like  dat." 

"  Honey,"  said  Chloe  under  her  breath, 
"did  you  tell  Miss  Sally?" 

"  What  I  gwine  tell  Miss  Sally  f er  ?  I  tuck 
de  basket  home,  en  me  en  de  ole  'oman  en 
William  Henry  walloped  de  vittles  up." 

"  Well,  I  thank  de  good  Lord  for  dat ! " 
exclaimed  Chloe  with  a  sigh  of  relief,  and  just 
then  Miss  Sally  came  into  the  kitchen  with  a 
swish  and  a  flutter  to  ask  why  breakfast  was 
so  late.  Chloe  will  never  know  whether  the 
lady  heard  what  was  said  about  the  basket  of 
victuals,  but  Uncle  Remus  knows. 


XIII. 

A     QUEER      EXPERIENCE     WITH     THE     PHONO- 
GRAPH. 

Not  long  ago  the  husband  of  the  lady  whom 
Uncle  Kemus  calls  "  Miss  Sally  "  carried  home 
a  phonograph,  or  graphophone,  for  the  edifi- 
cation and  amusement  of  his  family.  There 
were  several  cylinders  with  the  machine :  one 
or  two  comic  solos,  some  pieces  by  a  military 
band,  a  banjo  solo,  the  chimes  of  Trinity 
Church,  and  some  blank  cylinders  for  experi- 
ment. When  they  had  all  enjoyed  the  per- 
formance of  this  wonderful  invention,  and  had 
been  duly  amazed  at  the  vivid  reproduction  of 
the  slightest  shades  of  sound,  the  lady  of  the 
house  thought  of  Uncle  Remus,  who  was  en- 
gaged in  repairing  the  grape  arbor  in  the 
garden.  She  placed  one  of  the  unused  cylin- 
ders in  the  little  machine,  set  it  in  motion,  and 
proceeded  to  talk  into  the  receiver,  imitating 
the  voice  of  the  cook.  The  result  was  a  dia- 
logue between  herself  and  the  cook,  in  which 


EXPERIENCE  WITH  TEE  PHONOGRAPH.    293 

Uncle  Remus  was  the  subject  of  discussion. 
In  a  little  while  the  old  man  made  his  appear- 
ance at  the  door.  He  had  dropped  his  hat 
on  the  back  steps,  and  as  he  stood  bareheaded 
in  the  attitude  of  expectancy,  with  a  half  hu- 
morous expression  on  his  weather-beaten  fea- 
tures, he  cut  a  figure  that  was  not  without  its 
pathetic  suggestions. 

"  Is  you  sen*  for  me,  Miss  Sally  ?  "  he  in- 
quired. 

"  Yes,"  said  the  lady.  "  I  've  got  a  little 
machine  I  want  to  show  you.  Come  over  here. 
Now  stand  there  and  put  these  cups  over  your 
ears." 

"  Miss  Sally,  what  kinder  contraption  dish 
yer  ?  "  the  old  man  asked,  examining  the  ear 
tubes  suspiciously.  "  Please,  ma'm,  don't  play 
no  pranks  on  me.  I  been  feelin'  skittish  all 
day,  en  ef  you  git  me  skeer'd  I  'm  bleedz  ter 
holler." 

"  Don't  be  so  stupid,"  exclaimed  the  lady  ; 
"  put  the  things  over  your  ears." 

"  Miss  Sally,  what  you  gwine  ter  do  ?  My 
work  waitin'  fer  me  right  now,  en  it  got 
ter  be  done  dis  blessed  day  —  ain't  it,  Mars 
John?" 

The  gentleman  appealed  to  pretended  to  be 


294         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

playing  with  the  children,  and  made  no  re* 
sponse. 

"  I  believe  you  are  losing  your  mind/'  said 
the  lady.    "  Put  those  things  over  your  ears." 

*  Miss  Sally/'  protested  Uncle  Reinus,  "  I 
ain't  got  no  time  fer  ter  be  projickin'  in  here. 
I  been  knowin'  you  ever  sense  you  'uz  born,  an 
I  know  right  pine-blank  you  'er  fixin'  fer  ter 
git  me  in  trouble.  Deze  yer  fixin's  is  holler, 
en  I  dunner  what  dey  got  in  urn." 

"  Are  you  going  to  put  them  on  ?  "  inquired 
the  lady  impatiently. 

"  Miss  Sally,  fer  de  Lord  sake  lemme  go  out 
yonder  en  do  my  work.  I  ain't  use  to  no 
kinder  harness  like  dis,  mo'  speshually  puttin' 
blinds  on  my  years.  I  '11  put  um  on,"  he  con- 
tinued, seeing  that  protest  was  useless,  "  but 
atter  you  git  me  hitched  up,  I  'm  sholy  gwine 
ter  break  sump'n,  en  't  won't  be  my  fault 
nudder.     I  tell  you  dat  now." 

Uncle  Remus  adjusted  the  tubes  to  his  ears, 
and  his  Miss  Sally  started  the  machine.  First 
came  the  announcement  of  the  piece  in  a  voice 
that  sounded  like  it  had  been  dug  out  of  a  tin 
mine  and  hardened  by  the  Bessemer  process. 
It  was  so  startlingly  near,  that  Uncle  Remus, 
whose  politeness  is  a  part  of  his  nature,  dodged 


EXPERIENCE  WITH  THE  PHONOGRAPH.    295 

his  head,  and  exclaimed  "  Suh !  "  rolling  his 
eyes  at  his  Miss  Sally. 

Then  the  band  struck  up,  and  the  old  man 
seemed  to  enjoy  it  immensely.  He  shut  his 
eyes,  and  then  suddenly  opened  them,  as  if  to 
make  sure  that  he  was  still  in  the  neighbor- 
hood. Presently  the  band  concluded  with  the 
usual  crash,  and  Uncle  Remus  drew  a  long 
breath  of  relief,  as  his  Miss  Sally  stopped  the 
phonograph. 

"  What  did  you  hear  ?  "  she  asked,  as  the 
old  man  took  the  tubes  from  his  ears  and  pro- 
ceeded to  examine  them  more  closely  than 
before.  He  looked  at  them  inside  and  out, 
and  then  fitted  them  to  his  ears  again,  but  he 
heard  nothing. 

"  Miss  Sally,"  he  exclaimed,  "  I  wish  you  'd 
please  'm  tell  me  wharbouts  deze  yer  pipes 
leads  ter  ?  " 

"  Right  to  the  phonograph,  here." 

"  De  which,  'm?" 

"  The  phonograph  —  this  little  machine 
here." 

"  Uh-uh,  Miss  Sally  !  Dey  may  fool  you, 
but  I  done  been  yer  too  long  fer  dat ;  dey  can't 
fool  me.  De  t'er  een'  er  deze  yer  pipes  ain't 
so  mighty  fer  fum  de  circus.     I  dunner  whar- 


296  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

bouts  de  circus  is,  but  wharsomever  de  show 's 
a-gwine  on,  right  dar  is  de  t'er  een'  er  dem  ar 
pipes.  You  ax  Mars  John  dar,  en  ef  he  ain't 
playin'  no  prank  on  you,  'long  er  dish  yer 
contraption,  he  '11  tell  you  de  same.  When  I 
go  home  ter  night,  I  gwine  ter  holler  at  my 
ole  'oman  :  '  You  Kather'n  !  wake  up  f  um 
dar  whar  you  settin'  noddin'  by  de  chimbly 
jam  !  Wake  up  from  dar  !  You  say  yo'  Miss 
Sally  de  smartest  white  'oman  in  de  Nunited 
State  er  Georgy,  en  yit  yer  she  is  done  bin 
fooled  by  dem  town  folks.'  Dat  des  'zackly 
what  I  'm  gwine  ter  tell  'er,  en  I  boun'  you 
Mars  John '11  b'ar  me  out  in  it  —  won't  you 
Mars  John  ?  " 

Uncle  Eemus  rattled  this  off  so  rapidly  that 
the  lady  had  no  opportunity  to  interrupt  him. 
At  last  she  said,  with  some  show  of  vexation  : 

"  If  your  head  was  n't  so  thick,  you  'd  see 
that  the  music  is  on  this  cylinder." 

"  Wharbouts,  Miss  Sally  ?  " 

"  On  this  cylinder.  The  cylinder  is  covered 
with  wax,  and  the  music  is  on  the  wax." 

Uncle  Remus  put  on  his  spectacles,  exam- 
ined the  cylinder  closely,  and  then  looked  at 
his  Miss  Sally  curiously.  He  shook  his  head 
slowly  and  said  :  — 


EXPERIENCE  WITH  THE  PHONOGRAPH.    297 

"  Miss  Sally,  I  bin  knowin'  you  sense  you 
wuz  a  little  bit  er  baby,  en  I  ain't  never  hear 
you  gwine  on  dis  away  befo\  I  wish  you  'd 
please  'm  tell  me  how  dat  ar  brass  ban'  gwine 
git  in  dar.  De  ban'  what  I  hear  in  deze  yer 
pipes  had  de  big  horn  en  de  bass  drum  in  it 
yit,  let  'lone  all  de  yuther  horns,  en  my  min' 
pi'ntedly  tells  me  dat  ef  dey  wuz  all  ter  git  in 
dat  ar  shebang  dar,  dey  'd  bust  it  wide  open. 
Now  you  know  dat  yo'se'f,  Miss  Sally." 

The  lady  wanted  to  laugh,  but,  instead, 
she  adjusted  another  cylinder,  and  told  the 
old  man  to  place  the  tubes  to  his  ears.  It 
was  the  banjo  solo  —  the  old  make-believe 
affair  with  the  mould  of  age  on  its  whiskers. 
When  it  was  concluded,  Uncle  Remus  ex- 
claimed :  — 

"What  I  tell  you,  Miss  Sally?  I  know'd 
dey  wuz  a  show  gwine  on  some'rs  'roun'  yer. 
Dar  wuz  de  man  pickin'  de  banjo,  en  doin' 
like  he  hear  folks  say  de  niggers  does.  I  kin 
shet  my  eyes  en  see  'im  right  now.  He  got 
blackin'  on  his  face,  en  his  eyes  is  mo'  blood- 
shotten  dan  what  niggers'  eyes  is.  He  got  on 
a  high  stove-pipe  hat,  en  he  showin'  de  bottom 
er  his  shoe  wid  chalk  marks  on  it.  He  ain't 
no  mo'  like  a  nigger  dan  a  bumble-bee  is  like 


HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

a  roan  mule.  Yit  dar  he  sets  en  plunks  on 
de  banjer.  Mars  John,"  the  old  man  went 
on,  "  you  reckon  Miss  Sally  gwine  ter  up'n 
'low  dat  dat  ar  man  wid  de  banjer  is  in  de 
beeswax  ?  " 

For  answer,  "  Mars  John  "  winked  his  eye 
and  shook  his  head  with  an  air  of  mystery. 
Meanwhile,  "  Miss  Sally  "  was  adjusting  the 
chimes  of  Trinity.  Uncle  Remus,  listening, 
winked  his  eyes  at  every  stroke  of  the  bells, 
and  remarked  when  the  ringing  ceased  :  — 

"  Is  anybody  ever  hear  de  beat  er  dat  ?  Ef 
dey  ain't  a  big  fire  broke  out  some'rs,  de 
meetin'  houses  is  all  got  in  er  bunch.  Dat  ar 
beeswax  got  a  mighty  tough  job  ef  it  got  ter 
hoi'  all  dem  bells." 

Then  came  the  conversation  between  Uncle 
Remus  and  the  cook,  which  had  been  spoken 
into  the  phonograph  by  "  Miss  Sally."  The 
old  man's  placid  countenance  gathered  severity 
as  the  dialogue  was  poured  into  his  ears.  The 
lady's  imitation  of  the  cook  was  cleverer  than 
she  had  intended,  and  when  Uncle  Remus 
hung  the  tubes  across  the  machine  there  was 
an  ominous  frown  on  his  brow. 

"  Where  are  you  going  ? "  asked  his  Miss 
Sally,  as  the  old  man  started  out. 


EXPERIENCE  WITH  THE  PHONOGRAPH.    299 

"  I  'm  gwine  out  dar  en  see  dat  nigger 
'oman.  Dat  ar  contraption  is  wuss  dan  run- 
nin'  de  kyards.  Hit  beats  eavedrappin\  Hit 
tell  you  what  folks  bin  sayin'  atter  dey  done 
said  it  en  gone.  Dat  nigger  'oman  out  dar  in 
de  kitchen  bin  talkin'  'bout  me  scan'lous." 

With  that  Uncle  Remus  went  out  into  the 
back  yard,  and  those  in  the  house  heard  a 
conversation  something  like  this  :  — 

"  I  ain't  been  talkin'  'bout  you  needer.  She 
tell  you  dat  ?     She  'uz  des  prankin'  wid  you." 

"  Miss  Sally  ain't  tell  me  nothin'  't  all.  I 
hear  de  ve'y  words  wid  my  own  years." 

"Lookyer,  nigger  man  !  is  you  gwine 
crazy  ?  Ef  you  is,  I  want  you  ter  g'way  f 'm 
here!" 

"  You  up'n  tell  Miss  Sally  dat  I  bin  stealin 
tater  pie,  en  fried  sossidge,  en  light  bread." 

"Is  she  tell  you  dat?" 

"  Miss  Sally  ain't  tell  me  nothin'.  I  tuck'n 
hear  de  ve'y  words.  What  you  done  wid  dat 
apern  full  er  biscuits  you  tuck'n  slipped  off 
wid  las'  night  ?  En  whar  dat  can  er  devilish 
ham,  en  dat  ar  bag  er  prunes,  en  dem  ar  spar'- 
ribs  what  you  kyard  off  day  'f  o'  yistiddy  ?  " 

"  I  ain't  deff  !  What  you  want  to  be  hol- 
ler'n  so  loud  f er  ?    She  don't  wanter  hear  you 


300  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

gwine  on  dat  away.  All  de  white  folks  wants 
is  ter  git  de  niggers  ter  quoilin'  an'  fightin' 
an'  see  urn  go  ter  de  chain-gang.  You  hush 
up  an'  go  on  'bout  yo'  business." 

A  little  later,  when  Miss  Sally  was  attend- 
ing to  affairs  in  the  dining-room,  the  cook 
took  occasion  to  remark  : — 

"  Miss  Sally,  you  better  make  dat  ole  nig- 
ger man  keep  his  mouf  off'n  me.  I  'm  gwine 
cripple  him,  mon,  ef  he  don't  lemme  'lone.  Is 
you  hear  what  he  tell  me  dis  evenin'  ?  " 

"  What  was  it  ?  "  asked  the  lady,  feigning 
ignorance. 

"  He  come  out  here,  he  did,"  said  the  cook, 
scornfully,  "  an'  say  dat  I  wuz  settin'  my  cap 
f  er  him,  kaze  you-all  had  'im  in  de  settin'-room 
dar  showin'  'im  de  picters.  He  de  sassiest  ole 
nigger  I  ever  is  see." 


XIV. 

A   CASE    OF   THE    GRIPPE. 

"  You  ain't  been  missin'  me  f  um  'roun'  here 
nowhars,  is  you,  Miss  Sally  ?  "  Uncle  Remus 
asked  one  morning  recently.  He  had  been  ill 
several  weeks,  and  had  just  made  his  appear- 
ance, looking  considerably  under  the  weather, 
as  the  phrase  goes. 

"  I  noticed,"  said  the  lady,  u  that  we  had 
been  saving  a  good  deal  of  victuals  lately,  and 
(yhloe  has  had  a  chance  to  get  around  the 
stove.  There  has  been  plenty  of  room  in  the 
kitchen.     Where  have  you  been  ?  " 

"  Bless  yo'  soul,  honey !  I  been  laid  up  — 
I  been  laid  up  sho'  nuff  dis  time.  De  time  has 
been  when  I  put  on  en  played  'possum,  but 
dat  time  done  gone.  I  been  had  de  measles, 
en  de  plooisy,  en  de  swamp  fever,  en  de  rheu- 
matiz,  en  de  rash,  but  I  never  is  had  nothin' 
H  all  like  dish  yer  sickness  what  laid  holt  un 
me  dis  time." 

"  Have  you  been  sick  ?  "  the  lady  asked. 


302  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

"  Now,  Miss  Sally/'  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus, 
"  you  know  I  been  sick.  Who  sent  me  dat 
ar  bottle  er  dram,  en  dat  ar  tum'ler  er  jelly,  en 
who  tol'  dat  ar  doctor  f er  ter  fetch  me  dat  ar 
truck  what  I  kin  tas'e  yit  ?  " 

"  What  did  the  doctor  say  was  the  matter 
with  you  ?  "  asked  the  lady. 

"  He  say  it  wuz  some  kinder  brown  sump'n 
n'er." 

"  Bronchitis?" 

"  Yassum ;  dat  what  he  say.  I  tol'  'im 
right  den  en  dar  dat  he  kin  take  dat  name  en 
gin  it  a  twist  er  two  en  kill  lots  er  white  folks, 
let  'lone  niggers.  He  call  de  sickness  dat,  but 
ole  Miss  Sessions,  which  she  live  not  fur  fum 
me,  she  'low  it  wuz  de  grip,  en  I  'speck  it  wuz, 
kaze  it  had  a  mighty  powerful  grip  on  me. 

"  Wellum,  eve'y  time  I  tuck  a  dose  er  doc- 
tor truck,  I  'd  up  en  take  a  dram  ;  en  hit  wuz 
nip  en  tuck  'twixt  de  truck  en  de  dram  ez  ter 
which  wuz  gwine  ter  kill  en  which  wuz  gwine 
ter  kyo.  But  de  dram  got  de  best  er  de  doc- 
tor truck,  en  so  here  I  is." 

"  Chloe  will  be  very  glad  to  see  you,"  said 
the  lady.  "  She  is  just  pining  for  some  col- 
ored man  to  sit  in  the  kitchen  and  put  his 
feet  in  the  stove." 


A  CASE  OF  THE  GRIPPE.  303 

"  De  Lord  he'p  my  soul,  Miss  Sally  !  "  ex- 
claimed Uncle  Remus,  "  how  you  does  go  on  ! 
Long  ez  de  sun  shine  like  she  do,  I  don't 
wanter  go  in  no  kitchen  en  see  Chlory  wipe 
out  de  tray  wid  de  towel  en  make  up  dough 
widout  washin'  her  han's.  Bless  you,  no !  I 
done  been  too  sick,  ma'm,  fer  ter  be  settin'  in 
de  house.' '  Here  the  old  negro  had  a  fit  of 
coughing  which  was  severe  enough  to  excite 
Miss  Sally's  pity. 

"  You  ought  to  be  in  bed  now,"  she  said. 
"  What  are  you  running  about  on  the  damp 
ground  for?  That  cough  is  enough  to  kill 
you." 

"  Miss  Sally,  please  ma'm  don't  excuse  me 
er  runnin',"  said  Uncle  Remus,  solemnly. 
"  I  'm  dat  weak  dat  it  tire  me  mos'  ez  much 
fer  ter  scratch  my  head  ez  it  useter  ter  plough  a 
ten  acre  fiel'.  Dat 's  de  Lord's  trufe.  En  ez 
ter  dat  cough  —  wellum,  hit  ain't  nothin'  't  all 
like  de  cough  what  I  had  when  I  wuz  sick 
sho'  nuff.  One  time  I  tuck'n  coughed  twel  I 
busted  a  button  off'n  my  shirt  collar.  I  'speck 
i  dat 's  one  er  de  reasons  I  got  well,  bekaze  my 
ole  'oman,  she  pick  up  dat  button,  she  did, 
en  make  a  great  'miration  over  it.  She  tuck'n 
tol'  some  er  de  yuther  niggers  dat  I  wuz  so 


304         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

sick  I  coughed  up  collar-buttons.  En  den 
here  dey  come  —  big  en  little,  old  en  young  — 
peepin'  in  de  do',  en  trompin'  thoo  de  house. 

"  One  ole  nigger  'oman  stuck  her  head  in  de 
do*  en  'low,  i  Well,  well,  well !  When  folks 
commence  fer  ter  cough  up  collar-buttons,  de 
las'  day  ain't  fur  off.'  Wid  dat,  ma'm,  I  up'd 
wid  one  er  my  shoes,  en  ef  she  had  n't  V  jerked 
her  head  back  so  quick  I  sho'ly  would  a  ruint 
her.  Wellum,  dat  het  things  mighty  hot,  kase 
my  ole  'oman  en  de  yuther  niggers  what  wuz 
hangin'  'roun',  waitin'  fer  me  ter  take  my 
dram  so  dey  kin  git  a  whiff  un  it,  dey  helt  up 
der  ban's  en  'low  dat  de  nigger  'oman  what 
I  flung  de  shoe  at  wuz  de  headquarters  er 
de  Cha'ty  Buryin'  S'ciety  er  de  Bruthin'  en 
Sister'n  er  Jeycho." 

"  What  was  that  ?  "  asked  the  lady,  "  the 
Charity  Burying  Society  of  the  Brothers  and 
Sisters  of  Jericho  ?  " 

"Dat  what  dey  call  it,  ma'm.  I  dunner 
how  dey  does,  ner  what  dey  does.  But  dar  I 
wuz  layin'  flat  er  my  back  en  done  flung  my 
shoe  at  de  headquarters  er  de  whole  shebang. 
I  done  tuck  er  dram  des  'fo'  I  split  de  do' 
jam'  wid  my  shoe,  en  de  niggers  all  make  so 
much  fuss  'bout  it  dat  I  got  up  en  tuck  an'er 


A  CASE  OF  THE  GRIPPE.  305 

one.  Dis  sorter  hep'd  matters,  yit  I  could  lay 
dar  wid  my  eyes  shot  en  de  pain  in  my  chist, 
en  hear  dem  niggers  gwine  on  kaze  I  let  drive 
at  dat  ole  nigger  'oman. 

"  Dey  talk  'bout  dis  eve'y  day,  en  eve'y 
time  dey  talk  'bout  it,  I  tuck  an'er  dram« 
Den  one  time  whiles  dey  thunk  I  wuz  sleep,  I 
hear  um  say  dat  de  ole  nigger  'oman  done 
got  intranced  on  account  er  my  flingin'  de 
shoe.  Dey  say  she  was  layin'  stretch  out  col' 
en  stiff,  wid  her  eyes  wide  open  en  her  thum's 
p'intin'  up'ards,  en  a-talkin'  in  her  sleep  same 
ez  de  man  what  sells  toof -powder  on  de  street. 
Dey  say  she  done  call  Remus'  name  nine  times., 
which  make  de  odd  number,  en  eve'y  time  she 
call  it  she  roll  her  eyes  en  groan  like  a  cow 
what  done  lose  her  cud.  Dey  'low  dat  she 
done  see  sights  in  de  hev'ms,  en  hear  um  call 
de  roll,  en  de  name  er  Remus  wan't  dar. 

"  Wellum,  wid  dat  I  riz  en  tuck  an'er  dram, 
en  I  sot  on  de  side  de  bed  en  say  ter  de  ole 
'oman  :  c  Tabby,'  sez  I, i  how  many  niggers  is 
dey  in  here  dat  don't  b'long  here  ?  I  want 
you  ter  count  um,'  sez  I,  '  kaze  I  'm  gwine  in 
a  trance  myse'f,  en  when  I  wake  up  I  want 
ter  know  des  'zackly  how  much  damage  been 
done.     Des  count  em,'  sez  I,  6  en  I  '11  mark 


306  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

urn  down  on  de  wall  here  wid  my  finger-nail, 
en  dem  what  gits  kilTt  in  de  scuffle  I  '11  scratch 
out  when  I  comes  out'n  de  trance.  Dat  ole 
nigger  'oman,'  sez  I,  '  kin  lay  dar  on  de  nV 
at  her  house  en  roll  her  eye-balls  en  work  de 
skin  on  her  head  backerds  en  forrerds,  but 
I  'm  diff'unt,'  sez  I.  '  Dat  ain't  de  kind  er 
trance  w'at  comes  over  me.  I  got  ter  have 
all  de  han'  roomance  what  I  kin  git.  Ef  any 
er  deze  here  ladies  en  gents/  sez  I,  '  has  got 
any  walkin'  canes  en  parasols  dat  dey  don't 
want  broke,  dey  better  kyar  um  outside  en 
lef  um  dar,  kaze  I  feels  my  kinder  trance 
comin'  on,'  sez  I. 

"  Wellum,  I  tuck  an'er  dram,  en  den  I  'gun 
ter  open  en  shet  my  mouf  sorter  quick  like. 
I  tuck  notice  dat  some  er  de  niggers  sidled 
to'rds  de  do'.  Den  I  'gun  ter  back  out'n  de 
bed  on  my  all-fours,  en  when  I  hit  de  fiV  I 
fetched  a  blate  mo'  samer  dan  a  yearlin'  calf. 
It 's  de  Lord's  trufe,  Miss  Sally,  'f o'  I  kin 
turn  'roun'  dey  want  no  niggers  nowhars 
aroun',  'ceppin'  me  en  de  bottle  er  dram. 
Der  wuz  a  shuffle  en  a  rustle,  en  dey  wuz  all 
gone.  En  my  ole  'oman,  she  went  wid  um, 
kaze  she  say  she  dunner  what  gwineter  hap- 
pen nex\" 


A  CASE  OF  THE  GUIPPE.  307 

"  You  were  drunk/'  said  the  lady,  severely. 

"  Yassum,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  serenely, 
*  I  'speck  so.  I  been  f  eelin'  better  ever  sence, 
en  I  des  thunk  I  'd  creep  'roun'  dis  mornin 
en  see  how  you  en  Mars  John  gittin'  on.  I 
ain't  got  no  big  appetite  like  I  useter  have,  but 
I  'lowed  maybe  you  would  n't  keer  ef  I  sot  out 
here  in  de  sun  whar  I  kin  smell  de  vittles 
a-cookin'." 

The  lady  looked  at  the  old  negro  curiously 
a  moment,  and  then  went  into  the  house  laugh- 
ing. 


XV. 

UNCLE   REMUs's   IDEAS   OF    CONJURING. 

"  I  hear  talk  how  you  been  eunjured,"  said 
Chloe,  as  Uncle  Reinus  took  his  seat  in  the 
kitchen  one  morning. 

"Who  sesso?"  inquired  the  old  man,  smil- 
ing placidly. 

"  Dat  what  dey  tells  me,"  said  Chloe,  with  a 
serious  air.  "  I  hear  lots  er  folks  sesso.  Oh, 
you  kin  laugh,  man,  but  ef  dey  git  atter  yer 
right  straight,  dey  '11  make  you  laugh  on  t'er 
side  er  yo'  mouf.     Dey  cert'n'y  will." 

Uncle  Eemus  rubbed  his  chin  thoughtfully 
and  shook  his  head,  but  continued  to  smile. 

"  Dey  tells  me,"  Chloe  went  on  in  a  louder 
and  more  emphatic  tone,  "  dat  de  time  when 
you  wuz  sick  you  tuck'n  flung  yo'  shoe  at 
Miss  Ca'line  Simpson,  an'  she  got  mad  an' 
went  home  an'  'come  in  tranced,  an'  now  she 
gwine  cunjur'  you." 

"I  hear  tell  so,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  serenely. 
"  She  say  I  'm  a  white  folks  nigger  anyhow,  en 


UNCLE  REMUS'S  IDEAS  OF  CONJURING.    309 

darf  o'  she  gwine  ter  ring  in  de  sperrets  on  me. 
Hit  come  right  straight.  Dey  ain't  no  hear- 
say 'bout  it.     She  done  sesso." 

"Ain't  you  skeer'd?"  asked  Chloe  in  a 
confidential  tone. 

"  What  I  skeer'd  un  ?  "  inquired  Uncle  Re- 
mus, with  a  show  of  indignation.  "Dat  ar 
nigger  'oman  ain't  got  none  de  'vantage  er  me 
when  it  come  down  ter  old-time  cunj'in'.  Ef 
she  is,  whar  she  git  it?  My  mammy  talked 
wid  sperrets,  an'  my  daddy  walked  in  his 
sleep.  How  come  I  can't  do  mo'  cunj'in'  in 
one  minnit  dan  what  she  kin  do  in  a  mont'  ?  " 

"  Man,  I  b'lieve  you  —  dat  I  does  !  "  ex- 
claimed Chloe,  edging  away  from  Uncle  Remus 
and  regarding  him  curiously. 

"  I  want  ter  ax  you  dis,"  the  old  man  con- 
tinued: "is  dat  nigger  'oman  fat,  er  is  she 
lean?" 

"  She  so  fat  she  skacely  kin  walk,"  replied 
Chloe. 

"  Well,  den,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  how  she 
gwine  cunjur'  anybody  ?  Tell  me  dat.  I  bin 
seem'  cunjur'  folks  ever  sence  I  wan't  no  big- 
ger dan  a  skin't  rabbit,  en  I  ain't  never  see  no 
fat  un  yit.  Dey  er  all  so  lean  dat  it  look  like 
der  skin  done  swunk  on  der  bones,  en  when 


310  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

dey  grin  you  kin  see  der  yaller  toofies.  Now 
you  des  watch  urn." 

"  Go  'way,  man  !  "  exclaimed  Chloe.  "  De 
Lord  knows  I  don't  wanter  see  none  un  urn, 
much  less  watch  urn." 

"  De  men  folks  what  do  de  cunj'in',"  Un- 
cle Kemus  went  on,  "is  diffunt.  De  'oman 
folks  is  lean,  but  de  men  folks,  dey  er  lean  er 
fat  ez  de  case  may  be.  You  can't  tell  de  cun- 
jur'  man  'less'n  you  watch  his  eye  right  closte. 
Ef  he  show  too  much  er  de  eyeball  en  dey  's 
a  streak  er  red  splashed  roun'  de  cornder,  you 
watch  'im.  You  hear  me  now- — you  watch 
'im ! " 

"What  de  name  er  de  Lord  I  want  ter 
watch  'im  f er  ?  "  asked  Chloe,  nervously.  "  I 
ain't  gwine  to  be  watchin'  no  cunjur'  man.  I 
boun'  you  I  got  my  work  ter  do." 

"  I  done  bin  had  de  'sperience  un  it,"  the 
old  man  continued.  "  I  done  bin  see  urn  work 
der  tricks,  en  I  done  larnt  all  der  signs." 

"  Well,  don't  come  projickin*  wid  me,"  ex- 
claimed Chloe.  "  Yo'  eye  look  red  now  —  dat 
it  do ! " 

"  I  kin  turn  dat  ar  broom  dar  on  de  eend, 
en  name  it  fer  you,"  said  Uncle  Eemus,  pur- 
suing the  subject,  "  en  you  '11  hatter  pack  up 


fJNCLE  REMUS' S  IDEAS  OF  CONJURING.    311 

yo'  duds  en  leave  here.  I  kin  fling  it  down  in 
de  flo',  en  ef  you  step  'cross  it,  you  '11  hatter 
min'  eve'y  word  I  say.  I  kin  take  de  same 
broom  en  go  out  dar  in  de  yard  en  sweep  your 
track  away,  en  you  '11  hatter  leave  'fo'  sun- 
down. I  kin  go  out  dar  en  pick  up  de  san' 
what  you  done  make  yo'  track  in,  en  fling  it 
in  runnin'  water,  en  you  '11  hatter  travel  ez  fur 
ez  de  water  does.  You  see  ole  Remus  settin' 
here  like  he  got  no  sense.  You  better  keep 
yo'  eye  on  'im,  mon  !  " 

"  What  de  name  er  de  Lord  is  I  done  ter 
you  ?  "  cried  Chloe,  stopping  short  in  her  work, 
and  staring  at  Uncle  Remus.  "  You  comes  en 
you  goes,  en  I  ain't  never  pester  you  sence  you 
been  a  man  an'  I  been  a  'oman.  I  dunner 
what  make  you  keep  on  atter  me.  Ef  you 
wanter  come  cunj'in'  anybody,  you  better  cun- 
jur'  dat  ar  nigger  'oman  what  'low  she  gwine 
lay  a  spell  on  ter  you." 

"  Bless  yo'  soul,  chile ! "  exclaimed  Uncle 
Remus,  with  a  chuckle,  "  she  done  bin  fixt.  I 
ain't  mo'  dan  git  de  word  dat  she  gwine  trick 
me  dan  I  sot  myself  in  motion.  Now  whar  is 
she  ?    Des  tell  me  dat !     Wharbouts  is  she  ?  " 

"  Is  she  done  daid  ?  "  asked  Chloe  in  a  sub- 
dued tone. 


312         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  You  go  down  dar  whar  she  been  livm'," 
said  Uncle  Remus,  with  an  air  of  mystery,  "  en 
ax  wharbouts  is  she,  en  den  come  back  en  tell 
me  what  de  folks  say.  You  may  n't  b'lieve 
me,  but  you  bleedz  ter  b'lieve  dem.  Ef  you 
ax  me  wharbouts  is  she,  I  '11  up  en  tell  you 
she  's  gone ;  ef  you  ax  t'er  folks  wharbouts  is 
she,  dey  '11  up  en  tell  you  she  's  gone  —  no 
mo',  no  less." 

"What  'come  un  her?"  inquired  Chloe, 
with  open-eyed  astonishment. 

"  Hit 's  des  like  I  tell  you,"  replied  Uncle 
Remus,  solemnly.  "  She  done  make  her  dis- 
appearance." 

"  Is  you  done  cunju'd  her  ?  "  asked  Chloe. 

"  Not  what  you  might  call  right  straight  up 
en  down  cunj'in',"  said  the  old  man.  "  I  des 
sorter  wunk  my  eye  en  shuck  my  ringer,  en  de 
nigger  'oman  went  en  ax'd  her  'quaintances 
good-by.  I  look  like  I  ain't  much,  en  I  don't 
'speck  I  is ;  but  nummine  !  You  des  watch 
me!" 

"  Now !  "  exclaimed  Chloe,  "  why  n't  you 
tell  me  what  you  done  ter  de  'oman  ?  " 

"Well,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "'t ain't  no 
mighty  long  tale.  Atter  dat  nigger  'oman 
make  her  brags  dat  she  gwine  cunjur'  me,  she 


UNCLE  REMUS' S  IDEAS  OF  CONJURING.    313 

had  de  inshurance  fer  ter  come  ter  my  house. 
I  was  settin'  down  by  de  fier,  me  an'  William 
Henry,  when  I  hear  her  come  in  de  nex'  room 
en  pass  de  time  er  day  wid  my  ole  'oman.  I 
raise  my  finger  at  William  Henry  so  he  'd  be 
still,  en  den  I  beckon  'im  ter  come  close,  en 
den  I  say  dat  eve'yt'ing  I  tell  'im  ter  do,  he 
must  talk  out  loud  en  say,  i  I  know  right  whar 
it 's  at.'  Den  I  make  'im  set  down.  Atter 
while  I  holler  out :  — 

"  '  You  William  Henry  ! '  He  holler  back, 
i  Suh ! '  I  say,  c  I  want  you  ter  ketch  me 
sev'n  spring  lizzuds.'  He  'low,  c  Yasser,  I 
know  right  whar  dey  at.'  De  folks  in  de  nex' 
room  stop  talkin',  en  I  know'd  in  reason  dey 
wuz  lis'nen'.     Den  I  holler  out :  — 

" <  William  Henry ! '  He  holler  back,  <  Suh ! ' 
I  say,  '  I  want  you  ter  git  me  two  snake  skins.' 
He  'low,  i  Yasser,  I  know  right  whar  dey  at.' 
De  nigger  'oman  kep'  on  lis'nen'.  Den  I  hol- 
ler out :  — 

" '  William  Henry  ! '  He  holler  back,  <  Suh ! ' 
I  say,  'I  want  you  ter  fetch  me  two  toad 
frogs.'  He  'low,  <  Yasser,  I  know  right  whar 
dey  at.' 

"  I  sot  dar  en  waited  a  little  bit,  en  den  I 
hear  de  nigger  'oman  say  she  bleedz  ter  go,  en 


314  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

de  nex'  day  word  come  dat  she  done  move 
'way." 

Chloe  drew  a  long  breath  of  relief.  She 
had  expected  something  sensational,  and  had 
prepared  herself  to  be  shocked.  The  disap- 
pointment irritated  her. 

"  Does  you  call  dat  cunj'in'  ?  "  she  exclaimed 
scornfully. 

"  Hit  des  ez  good  ez  cunj'in',"  said  Uncle 
Remus.  "  What  mo'  does  you  want  ?  Does 
you  want  ter  be  cunju'd  ?  " 

"  No,"  said  Chloe,  in  a  more  amiable  tone, 
"  en  1  don't  want  you  ter  be  projickin'  long  er 
me,  nudder." 

"  Well,  den,"  said  the  old  man,  "  don't  be 
so  high-stringity  in  yo'  talk.  Fus'  news  you 
know,  you  'U  wish  dey  wan't  no  cunjurments. 
You  bin  hidin'  pie  fum  me  dis  long  time,  en 
folks  what  hides  pie  ain't  got  no  kinder 
showin'  when  it  cums  ter  hard-down  cunj'in'." 

"  Well,  de  Lord  knows,  man,  I  don't  be- 
grudge you  no  pie.  Here  's  a  piece  I  bin 
savin'  fer  you."  Chloe  lifted  a  tin  cover  and 
brought  forth  a  large  piece. 

"  Aha  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus,  "  did  I 
hafter  cunjur'  you  ter  git  dis  pie  ?  " 


XVI. 

VIEWS   ON   THE    AFRICAN   EXODUS. 

The  Southern  papers  have  not  devoted 
much  attention  to  the  movement  that  is  known 
as  the  "  African  exodus."  This  is  to  be  ac- 
counted for  by  the  fact  that  the  modern  re- 
porter, sharp  as  he  is,  has  never  yet  learned 
the  art  of  getting  information  from  the  ne- 
groes, particularly  if  they  are  disposed  to  hold 
their  tongues.  In  truth,  the  African  exodus, 
so  called,  is  important  as  well  as  serious.  It 
is  more  extensive  than  the  newspaper  men 
have  any  idea  of,  and  has  made  a  very  deep 
impression  on  a  certain  class  of  negroes. 

Uncle  Remus's  "  Miss  Sally "  discovered 
this  fact  the  other  morning,  while  she  was  at- 
tending to  her  domestic  duties,  and  heard  a 
very  interesting  controversy  in  the  bargain. 
The  old  man  went  into  the  kitchen,  as  was  his 
custom,  before  going  to  his  work.  On  this 
particular  morning  Chloe,  the  cook,  seemed  to 
be  in  a  very  good  humor.     She  saluted  Uncle 


316  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

Remus  cordially,  and  then  asked,  in  a  tone  of 
friendly  solicitude :  — 

"  Ain't  you  gwine  home  ?  " 

"  Ain't  I  gwine  whar  ?  "  responded  Uncle 
Remus. 

"Ain't  you  gwine  home?  Lots  of  'em 
gwine  home." 

"  What  I  gwine  home  f  er,  when  I  des  come 
f um  dar  ?  "  inquired  the  old  man,  looking  at 
Chloe  with  a  puzzled  expression. 

"  Ah,  Lord !  "  exclaimed  Chloe,  wiping  the 
flour  from  her  fat  arms  with  her  apron,  "  you 
ain't  bin  dar  yit.     You  better  git  ready  an' 

go." 

"How  come  I  ain't  bin  dar?  You  don't 
speck  I  bin  trollopin'  'roun'  fum  post  to  pillar 
de  whole  blessed  night,  does  you  ?  " 

"  I  went  down  ter  Zion  Chapel  las'  night, 
an'  dar  I  hear  Brer  John  Henry.  Man,  suh  ! 
I  ain't  never  hear  anybody  talk  purtier  dan 
what  Brer  John  Henry  did.  He  say,  he  did, 
dat  we  all  mus'  go  back  home  —  go  back  ter 
Af 'ica  whar  we  come  fum ;  an'  he  kep'  on  tell 
he  make  us  all  feel  right  thankful.  Sis  'Ria 
she  jump  up  an'  holler  bless  God !  she  gwine, 
an'  den  all  un  us  holler  dat  we  gwine.  I  hear 
talk  er  deze  white  folks  preachers  —  man !  dey 


VIEWS  ON  THE  AFRICAN  EXODUS.         317 

can't  hoi'  Brer  John  Henry  a  candle  when  he 
git  up  dar  in  de  pulpit  an'  begin  ter  rock  fum 
side  ter  side  an'  swing  his  arms.  You  better 
come  on  an*  go  wid  us  —  better  come  on  an* 
go  home." 

"  Who  —  me?"  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus  in- 
dignantly. "What  I  gwine  to  do  in  Affiky? 
I  ain't  no  Aflikin  nigger." 

"  Yes,  you  is,  too,"  said  Chloe,  somewhat 
wrought  up,  "  kaze  Brer  John  Henry  say 
dat  colored  folks  all  come  fum  Af'ica,  an' 
dem  what  'ny  it  speaks  fum  ign'ance  uv  de 
sperrit." 

"What  he  know  'bout  it?"  asked  Uncle 
Remus,  scornfully.  "  Down  yander  in  Put- 
mon  County  dat  ar  same  preacher  call  hisse'f 
Tom  Perryman,  an'  now  he  come  up  here  en 
call  hisse'f  John  Henry.  Ef  he  ain't  know  his 
own  name,  how  come  he  know  so  much  'bout 
Affiky  ?     Now  des  tell  me  dat." 

"  Ah,  Lord !  "  exclaimed  Chloe  with  inde- 
scribable unction.  "  Brer  John  Henry  know. 
He  could  n't  a-tdked  no  purtier  dan  ef  he  'd 
'a'  done  seed  it.  An'  we  er  all  a-gwine.  I  gi' 
'im  a  dollar,  an'  Sis  'Ria  gi'  'im  a  dollar,  an' 
ill  un  um  gi'  'im  a  dollar." 

"  Who  got  de  money  ? "  inquired  Uncle 
Remus.     "  Dish  yer  John  Henry  ?  " 


318  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

"  No,"  said  Chloe,  "  dey  wuz  a  man  dar,  an* 
he  tuck  de  money.  He  come  fum  'way  off 
yander,  an'  he  say  he  gwine  take  it  an'  buy 
tickets  ter  Af 'ica  fer  us  all.  He  say  he  done 
got  de  tickets,  and  he  gwine  ter  'stribbit  um 
'fo'  long,  des  soon  ez  de  ship  come  in." 

Here  Uncle  Remus  uttered  a  dismal  groan» 
"  Wuz  you  dar  when  dat  ar  Tom-en-Jerry 
preacher  "  — 

"He  name  Brer  John  Henry,"  exclaimed 
Chloe,  indignantly,  "dat  what  he  name." 

"  Wuz  you  dar,  Chlory,"  Uncle  Remus  went 
on,  "when  dat  ar  John  Henry  preacher  en 
de  t'er  man  went  'roun'  behime  de  house  en 
'vided  de  money  out  ?  " 

"  No,  I  wan't !  "  exclaimed  Chloe,  turning 
on  the  old  man  viciously,  "  an'  nobody  else 
ain't  seed  um  —  dat 's  what !  " 

"  I  'speck  dat 's  so,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  rub= 
bing  his  beard  thoughtfully.  "Dey  er  lots 
too  slick  fer  dat." 

"  I  dunner  what  you  want  ter  run  down  yo' 
own  color  fer,"  remarked  Chloe.  "  Better 
leave  dat  fer  de  white  folks." 

"  Whose  color  ? "  inquired  Uncle  Remus, 
with  angry  emphasis.  "  Ef  dat  ar  John  Henry 
ain't  paint  hisse'f,  he 's  a  rank  merlatter  ez  de 


VIEWS  ON  THE  AFRICAN  EXODUS.         319 

sun  ever  shined  on.  He  ain't  none  er  my 
color.  I  'm  a  full-blood  nigger,  myse'f,  en  I 
come  fum  Ferginny." 

"  Dat  what  make  me  say  what  I  does/'  said 
Chloe,  in  a  tone  at  once  friendly  and  confiden- 
tial. "  Bern'  ez  you  is  a  full-blood  nigger, 
you  oughter  come  en  go  'long  wid  us.  You 
oughter  come  en  go  home  ter  Af 'ica  wid  us. 
Brer  John  Henry  say  dat  de  full-blood  colored 
folks  is  got  mo'  p'int-blank  rights  in  Af 'ica 
dan  all  de  yuther  folks  put  together.  Brer 
John  Henry  cert'n'y  say  dem  ve'y  words." 

Uncle  Remus  leaned  against  the  wall  and 
groaned.  Chloe,  ignoring  the  old  man's  ap- 
parent contempt  for  the  scheme,  continued 
after  a  little  pause :  — 

"  Brer  John  Henry  say  we  all  des  ez  well 
go  now  ez  to  go  later.  He  say  dat  Af'ica 
b'longs  ter  de  colored  folks  by  good  rights,  en 
he  say  dey  oughter  go  en  take  occupiance  er 
de  Ian'  'fo'  it  git  tooken  up  by  white  folks. 
He  say  dat  all  dis  country  whar  we  at  now 
b'longs  ter  de  Injuns,  en  dey  er  gwine  ter 
come  back  here  en  take  it.  Dey  done  broke 
loose  out  yander  now ;  an'  Brer  John  Henry 
say  dat  what  dey  fightin'  fer,  on  account  er 
de  white  folks  takin'  der  Ian'  fum  um,  an* 


820  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

when  dey  come,  de  colored  folks  what  stay 
here  is  got  ter  fight  'em.  Brer  John  Henry 
is  sholy  say  dat,  kaze  I  hear  'im  wid  my  own 
years." 

The  only  comment  that  Uncle  Remus  made 
was  a  heart-rending  groan. 

"  You  may  well  ter  groan/'  Chloe  went  on. 
"  You  may  well  ter  groan  ef  you  ain't  gwine 
iiome  wid  us,  kaze  we  er  all  a-gwine.  De 
colored  folks  is  done  commence  ter  move. 
Dey  er  comin'  here  fum  Texas  an'  fum  all  out 
dar." 

'<  Comin'  whar?"  asked  Uncle  Remus. 

"  Comin'  here,  ter  dis  ve'y  town." 

"IsdisAffiky?" 

"  No,  't  ain't,  but  it 's  on  de  road,  an'  de 
colored  folks  is  a-movin'." 

"How  long  is  dey  gwine  ter  stay  'roun' 
yer  ?  "  Uncle  Remus  inquired,  straightening 
himself  up. 

"  Tell  de  ship  come,"  said  Chloe. 

"  Ah-yi ! "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus.  "  Twel 
de  ship  come.  Dat  des  'zactly  what  I  'lowed. 
Dey  er  gwine  ter  stay  twel  de  ship  come,  en 
betwixt  dis  time  en  dat,  what  dey  gwine  do  ? 
Who  gwine  ter  feed  um  ?  " 

u  Dey  gwine  ter  feed  deyse'f,"  said  Chloe, 


VIEWS  ON  THE  AFRICAN  EXODUS.         321 

indignantly.  "  Who  feed  'em  whar  dey  come 
f um  ?  Dey  had  ter  work  dar  —  let  'em  work 
here." 

"  I  ain't  so  mighty  sho'  en  certain  'bout  der 
workin',"  said  Uncle  Remus  placidly.  "  I  bin 
noticin'  dis,  dat  whar  you  fin'  niggers  so  keen 
fer  ter  traipse  about  fum  post  ter  pillar,  dey 
ain't  apt  ter  hurt  deyse'f  wid  work.  Some  un 
um  bin  runnin'  fum  work  ever  sence  de  farmin* 
days  wuz  over.  An'  dey  er  makin'  a  great  to- 
do  'bout  gwine  off  ter  Affiky,  kaze  somebody 
done  gone  en  tole  um  dat  all  dey  got  ter  do 
atter  dey  git  dar  is  ter  set  in  de  sun  en  watch 
de  truck  grow.  All  dey  got  ter  do  is  ter  set 
dar  en  let  der  ha'r  grow  bushy.  Ain't  de 
man  what  wuz  'vidin'  out  de  money  wid  dat 
ar  John  Henry  preacher  a  white  man  ?  " 

"  What  ef  he  is  ?  "  responded  Chloe,  snap- 
pishly ;  "  what  dat  got  ter  do  wid  it  ?  " 

"  Dar  't  is  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus  tri- 
umphantly. "  You  dunner  whar  he  come  fum. 
You  dunner  how  long  he  gwine  stay.  You 
dunner  whar  he  gwine.  Yit  de  niggers  is 
givin'  'im  der  money,  en  makin'  ready  ter  go 
ter  Affiky.  Dey  er  des  er  swarmin'  ter  At- 
lanta en  makin'  ready  ter  cross  de  Atlanta 
Ocean,  when  't  won't  mo'  dan  kyar  um  'cross 


322  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

town  en  back.     En  yit,  here  you  is  talkin'  ter 
me  'bout  bein'  er  white  folks  nigger." 

"  I  don't  keer ;  I  don't  keer !  "  exclaimed 
Chloe.     "  I  know  what  Brer  John  Henry  say." 

"  Ef  dat  ar  white  man  wuz  ter  come  honeyin' 
'roun'  me,"  continued  Uncle  Remus,  "  I  'd  do 
'im  like  de  Coon  did  de  Polecat." 

"  Go  off  fum  here !  "  said  Chloe.  "  What 
de  Coon  do?" 

"  One  mighty  col'  day,  Mr.  Coon  wuz  layin' 
up  in  his  house,  which  he  call  it  de  Holler 
Tree  Tavern.  He  wuz  all  quiled  up  in  dar, 
warm  en  snug,  when  he  year  somebody  knock- 
in'  at  de  do'.  Hit  'uz  Mr.  Polecat.  Mr.  Coon 
say,  <  Who  dar  ? '  Mr.  Polecat  say,  '  Hit 's  me.' 
Den  Mr.  Coon  say,  '  What  you  want  ?  '  Mr. 
Polecat  say,  '  Open  de  do',  I  wanter  come  in 
en  warm.'  Mr.  Coon  say,  '  What  you  name  ? ' 
Mr.  Polecat  say,  '  I  'm  name  Coony  Coon,  fum 
Coon  Holler.  I  'm  de  bes'  frien'  yo'  gran 'pa 
is  ever  had.'  Mr.  Coon  crack  de  do'  en  peep 
at  'im,  en  den  he  say,  '  Uh-uh  !  you  don't  look 
like  coon,  you  don't  walk  like  coon,  you  don't 
talk  like  coon,  en  I  know  mighty  well  you  don't 
smell  like  coon.     You  can't  come  in  here ! ' 

"  I  say  it ! "  exclaimed  Chloe,  restored  to 
good  humor. 


VIEWS  ON  THE  AFRICAN  EXODUS.         323 

"Miss  Sally,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  turning 
to  the  lady  of  the  house,  who  came  in  just 
then,  "  I  'in  gwine  'roun'  en  tighten  up  de 
chicken-house  en  de  sto'-room  twel  dish  yer 
Affikin  move  is  done  blowed  over.  Chlory 
dar"— 

"  Miss  Sally ! "  exclaimed  Chloe,  "  I  '11  hatter 
quit  here  ef  you  don't  make  dat  ole  nigger 
man  go  on  'bout  his  business.  He  been  in 
here  quoilin'  de  whole  blessed  mornin'." 

But  before  the  lady  could  say  anything, 
Uncle  Remus  was  rapidly  walking  across  the 
yard  with  a  rake  on  his  shoulder. 


XVII. 

UNCLE    REMUS    ON    AN    ELECTRIC    CAR, 

One  pleasant  day  not  long  ago  Uncle  Re- 
mus concluded  that  he  would  take  a  ride  on 
the  electric  car.  He  had  been  engaged  for 
some  time  in  making  up  his  mind.  There  was 
enough  of  mystery  about  the  means  of  locomo- 
tion to  make  him  somewhat  skittish.  In  point 
of  fact,  he  had  his  own  private  opinion,  for- 
tified by  an  abundant  supply  of  superstition, 
in  regard  to  the  whole  matter.  Nevertheless, 
he  decided  to  make  a  little  excursion  on  the 
car.  He  saw  other  people  riding,  and  what 
they  did  he  could  do. 

So  the  old  man  was  on  hand  when  the  car 
came  down  to  the  starting-point,  where  there 
is  a  wait  of  five  minutes.  He  watched  the 
conductor  reverse  the  contrivance  that  con- 
nects the  motor  with  the  overhead  wire,  and 
then  he  got  on.  He  smiled  as  he  took  his 
seat,  but  even  his  smile  betrayed  his  anxiety. 
He  fumbled  about   in   his   pockets  until   he 


UNCLE  REMUS  ON  AN  ELECTRIC  CAR.    325 

found  a  quarter,  which   he  proffered  to  the 
motor-man. 

"  Don't  be  in  a  hurry,  old  man,"  said  that 
important  functionary;  "the  conductor  will 
get  your  fare." 

"  Yasser,"  said  Uncle  Remus.  "  On  de  tver 
line  whar  dey  got  muels,  I  hatter  gi'  de  money 
ter  de  driver  —  dat  w'at  make  I  han'  it  ter 
you.  Dish  yer  ain't  de  same  kind  er  kyar. 
Hit  look  mighty  blank  out  dar.  I  'd  feel  lots 
better  ef  dey  wuz  a  waggin  tongue  stickin' 
out  dar,  er  some  muels  er  sump'n." 

"  Why,  if  we  had  mules  out  there,"  said  the 
motor-man,  with  a  consequential  air,  "  they 
would  n't  last  five  minutes.  We  'd  run  over 
'em.     We  'd  grind  them  into  jiblets." 

"  You  hear  dat !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus, 
solemnly,  addressing  no  one  in  particular. 
After  a  pause,  the  old  man  continued :  — - 

"  Boss,  is  de  stuff  what  make  dish  yer  kyar 
go  —  is  she  de  same  ez  dat  w'at  make  de 
thunder?" 

"  The  very  same,"  said  the  man. 

"  Ain't  you  skeer'd  ?  "  asked  Uncle  Remus. 

"  Naw  !  "  said  the  motor-man  ;  "  so  long  as 
it  don't  singe  the  hair  on  my  head,  I  ain't 
afraid." 


326  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

"  Well,  suh !  "  exclaimed  the  old  negro,  look- 
ing at  the  man  admiringly.  Then,  after  a 
little  pause  :  "  Boss,  does  you  keep  de  truck  in 
dat  ar  churn  dar  ?  "  indicating  the  brass  cylin- 
der containing  the  machinery  for  turning  on 
and  shutting  off  the  electric  current. 

Something  in  Uncle  Remus' s  tone  —  some 
suggestion  of  unusual  politeness  and  affability 
—  caused  the  motor-man  to  look  at  him  more 
closely,  and  the  look  was  followed  by  a  pleas- 
ant smile,  which  was  at  once  a  recognition  of 
and  a  tribute  to  the  old  negro's  attitude  of  re- 
spectful anxiety. 

"  Yes,"  said  the  motor-man,  "  we  keep  it  in 
here,"  touching  the  cylinder  with  his  foot, 
"  and  when  we  want  any  we  just  turn  it  on." 

"  Same  like  you  draw  'simmon  beer  out'n  a 
bar'l  ?  "  suggested  Uncle  Remus. 

"  Yes,"  said  the  motor-man,  "  somewhat 
similarly." 

"  Sometimes,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  de  beer 
got  sech  a  head  on  'er  dat  she  '11  fly  out  en 
flew  all  over  you.  Do  dat  truck  do  dat 
away  ?  " 

"It  ain't  never  done  it  yet,"  replied  the 
motor-man,  "  and  when  it  does,  I  want  to  be 
plumb  away  from  here." 


UNCLE  BEMUS  ON  AN  ELECTRIC  CAB.    327 

u  Ef  it 's  de  same  kinder  truck  what  busts 
aloose  in  de  elements/'  said  Uncle  Remus, 
"  dey  must  be  enough  un  it  in  dat  churn  dar 
ter  make  thunder  endurin'  a  whole  summer." 

The  motor-man  made  no  reply  to  this.  In 
response  to  a  signal  from  the  conductor,  he 
struck  the  gong  sharply  with  his  foot,  causing 
Uncle  Remus  to  dodge  as  if  he  had  been  shot 
at,  turned  on  the  current,  and  started  the  car. 
A  negro  girl  sitting  opposite  Uncle  Remus 
put  a  corner  of  her  shawl  in  her  mouth  and 
tittered.  The  old  man  turned  on  her  fiercely 
and  exclaimed :  — 

"  Whar  yo'  manners,  gal  ?  Is  dat  de  way 
yo*  mammy  Tarn  you  —  come  gigglin'  in  com- 
p'ny?" 

"  De  Lord  knows  I  ain't  doin'  nothin',"  said 
the  girl,  twisting  herself  around  on  the  seat. 
"  I  des  settin'  here  ten'in'  to  my  own  business. 
I  wan't  savin'  a  blessed  word  to  nobody." 

"  Who  you  grinnin'  an'  gigglin'  at,  den  ?  " 
asked  Uncle  Remus  severely.  "  You  '11  be 
a-gwine  on  dat  away  some  er  deze  yer  odd- 
come-shorts  an'  you  '11  break  yo'  puckering 
string.     Den  what  you  gwine  ter  do  ?  " 

"  Mister,"  said  the  girl,  turning  to  the  con- 
ductor, "  I  wish  you  'd  please,  sir,  make  dis 


528  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

colored  man  lemme  'lone.  I  ain't  doin'  a 
blessed  thing  to  him." 

"  Fare  !  "  exclaimed  the  conductor.  He 
spoke  so  loudly  and  so  unexpectedly  that 
Uncle  Kemus  dodged  again,  and  this  time  he 
flung  his  right  arm  above  his  head  as  if  to  de- 
fend himself.  This  gave  the  angry  girl  the 
opportunity  she  wanted. 

"  Des  look  at  dat  ole  man ! "  she  cried. 
"  I  b'lieve  he  goin'  crazy."  Then  she  began 
to  laugh  again.  Even  the  conductor  smiled, 
and  Uncle  Remus,  perceiving  this,  smiled  him- 
self, but  somewhat  grimly. 

As  the  conductor  was  giving  him  his 
change,  a  peculiar  groaning  sound  issued  from 
the  motor  underneath  the  car. 

"Boss,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  somewhat  anx- 
iously, "  wharbouts  is  all  dat  zoonin'  ?  Hit 
soun'  like  de  win'  blowin'  thoo  a  knot-hole." 

"  It 's  the  current,"  said  the  conductor. 

"  Yasser  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus.  "  Dat 
what  I  'low'd  hit  wuz.  Hit  bawlin'  down  dar 
like  a  steer  calf  lef '  out  in  de  rain.  She  ain't 
gwine  ter  bus'  loose  en  t'ar  up  nothin',  is  she5 
boss?" 

"  Not  right  now,  I  reckon,"  replied  the  con- 
ductor. 


UNCLE  REMUS  ON  AN  ELECTRIC  CAR.    329 

This  was  very  unsatisfactory  to  the  old 
negro,  particularly  as  the  zooning  and  groan- 
ing sound  continued  to  grow  louder.  He 
looked  out  of  the  window,  first  on  one  side 
and  then  on  the  other,  and  then  rose  and  seized 
the  handstrap  and  gave  it  a  jerk.  Seeing 
that  the  car  kept  on,  Uncle  Remus  gave  the 
strap  a  more  violent  tug,  and  then  another  and 
another. 

"  Ef  she  's  a-runnin'  away,"  he  exclaimed, 
"  des  say  de  word  en  I  '11  t'ar  up  de  flo',  but 
I  '11  git  out'n  here." 

Seeing  the  old  man's  predicament,  the  con- 
ductor pulled  the  bell,  and  the  car  stopped. 

"  Dat  what  make  I  say  what  I  does,"  ex- 
claimed Uncle  Remus,  with  some  show  of  in- 
dignation, as  he  shuffled  towards  the  door. 
"  I  'm  gwine  ter  tell  you  all  good-by.  You 
kin  set  dar  en  listen  at  de  interruptions  gwine 
on  in  de  intruls  er  dish  yer  kyar,  but  I  'm 
gwine,  I  am.  I  done  foun*  out  long  ergo  dat 
no  'spectable  nigger  ain't  got  no  business 
gwine  whar  white  folks  f  ear'd  to  resk  der  muels. 
?  wish  you  mighty  well !  " 


xvm. 

WILLIAM   HENRY   AT   SCHOOL. 

Uncle  Remus  was  working  in  his  Miss 
Sally's  flower  garden  recently,  spading  up  the 
beds  and  dividing  and  replanting  bulbs.  The 
lady,  who  takes  great  pride  in  her  flowers  and 
plants,  was  superintending  the  work.  The 
old  man  was  not  in  a  very  talkative  humor  at 
first,  but  his  humor  changed  when  his  Miss 
Sally  began  to  inquire  about  bis  grandson. 

"  Was  n't  he  named  William  Henry  ?  "  she 
asked. 

"  Yassum,"  said  Uncle  Remus  with  a  sigh, 
"  dat  what  Lucindy  call  'im.  I  tuck'n  tol'  'er 
den  dat  she  wuz  loadin'  'im  down  wid  name, 
but  dat  ar  nigger  man  what  she  cook  en  wash 
fer,  he  named  'im  atter  some  er  his  kin  what 
bin  in  de  chain-gang.  He  bleedz  ter  bin  in  de 
chain-gang,  kaze  he's  a  town  nigger,  en  I 
ain't  never  is  lay  eyes  on  'im." 

"  How  old  is  William  Henry  ?  "  asked  the 
lady. 


WILLIAM  HENRY  AT  SCHOOL.  331 

u  Wellum,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  reflecting  a 
little,  "  he  wuz  born  endurin'  er  de  year  when 
Mars  John  kicked  up  sech  a  racket  kaze  he 
had  dat  ar  bile  on  de  back  er  de  neck." 

"  Let  me  see,"  said  Miss  Sally.  "  That  was 
in  1878.  William  Henry  must  be  thirteen 
years  old." 

"  Yassum,  I  'speck  he  is.  I  dunner  what 
gwine  ter  come  un  'im,  kaze  Lucindy  done 
gone  clean  back  on  'er  raisin'.  I  bin  mighty 
worried  'bout  dat  boy.  My  ole  'oman  say  he 
take  atter  me.  I  ain't  never  see  no  mo'  likelier 
nigger  dan  what  dat  boy  is,  yit  he  sholy  gwine 
ter  be  mint.  Lucindy  come  ter  my  house  yis- 
tiddy  en  ax  me  is  I  seed  William  Henry,  en  I 
tol'  'er  no  I  ain't,  en  I  did  n't  want  ter  see 
'im,  kaze  she  raisin'  'im  up  fer  de  chain-gang. 
Den  Lucindy  say  she  sent  'im  ter  school,  en  he 
done  make  his  disappearance  a  mont'  ago,  en 
she  ain't  never  tell  me  kaze  she  skeer'd  I  gwine 
ter  git  mad."  Uncle  Remus  paused,  looking 
around  as  if  in  search  of  a  clue  to  some  word 
or  phrase  by  which  he  might  describe  his 
feelings.  Not  finding  any,  he  groaned  and 
went  to  digging  again. 

"  What  did  you  say  to  her  ?  "  asked  Miss 
SaUy. 


332  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  Now,  Miss  Sally,  you  bin  Snowin'  me  long 
nuff  ter  know  purty  well  what  I  toF  dat  gal. 
Mon,  I  gin  'er  one  er  de  ole-time  talks.  She  's 
a  grown  married  'oman,  en  got  children  yit, 
but  I  des  grabbed  up  a  brush-broom,  and  I  des 
nat'rally  frailed  her  out.  I  did  dat.  En  nex' 
time  I  see  'er  I  'm  gwine  frail  'er  ag'in  —  I 
don't  keer  whar  she  at.  You  know  yo'se'f, 
Miss  Sally,"  the  old  man  went  on,  "  dat  I 
tried  ter  raise  dat  ar  gal  right.  All  de  time 
she  staid  wid  me  en  'er  mammy,  it  look  like 
butter  won't  melt  in  'er  mouf,  but  des  ez  soon 
ez  she  marry  dat  ar  hotel  nigger  what  w'ar 
streaked  britches  en  a  stove-pipe  hat,  she  look 
like  she  gwine  ter  run  'stracted.  En  den,  on 
top  er  dat,  she  tuck  en  jinded  deze  yer  Breed- 
in'  Dove  en  Rastlin'  Jacob  S'ciety.  Salt  ain't 
gwine  ter  save  dat  kin'  er  nigger  'oman,  I 
don't  keer  ef  she  is  my  own  daughter.  I 
ain't  had  no  trouble  wid  de  nigger  man  w'at 
marry  'er.  I  done  tol'  'im  long  ergo  dat  ef 
he  cut  any  town  shines  wid  me  he  gwine  ter 
git  hurted.  Streaked  britches  en  calico  shirts 
don't  pass  wid  me.  I  git  nuff  er  dem  mGs' 
quick  ez  I  does  dat  ar  truck  what  Mars  John 
stuck  under  my  nose  t'er  day." 

"  Hartshorn  ?  "  suggested  Miss  Sally. 


WILLIAM  HENRiT  AT  SCHOOL.  333 

u  Yassum,  I  'speck  so.  She  sholy  is  rank, 
mo'  speshually  when  she  git  in  yo'  nose  en  up 
dar  behime  yo'  eyeballs.  Ef  I  'd  been  boun' 
by  law  ter  take  one  mo'  whiff  er  dat  truck, 
'twould  er  bin  good-by  Remus,  sho.  Miss 
Sally,  Mars  John  gwine  ter  kill  some  er  deze 
yer  niggers,  projickin'  'roun'  dat  away,  en  den 
hit  '11  be  all  you  kin  do  ter  keep  'im  out'n  de 
calaboose. 

"  What  is  the  matter  with  Lucindy  ?  "  asked 
Miss  Sally,  taking  the  old  man  back  to  his 
subject. 

"  Wellum,  she  done  tetotally  mint  wid  deza 
yer  town  idees.  De  fus'  time  I  know'd  she 
gwine  wrong,  she  come  ter  my  house  one  night 
wid  dat  hotel  nigger  er  hern  en  some  yuther 
gals.  She  come  in  de  do'  a-gigglin',  en  she  up 
en  'low,  she  did,  t  Howdy,  popper  !  '  I  look  at 
'er  en  say,  '  Which  ?  '  Den  she  say,  '  Howdy, 
popper !  '  I  riz,  I  did,  en  grab  my  cane  en 
'low,  '  Who  you  foolin'  'long  wid,  you  triflin' 
huzzy  ?  Ef  you  dast  ter  come  poppin'  me,  I  '11 
pop  you ;  I  '11  lay  you  out  in  de  Ho'.  Ef  I 
ain't  yo'  daddy,  I  ain't  no  kin  ter  you.'  Yas- 
sum,  I  said  dem  ve'y  words. 

"  Dat  de  fus'  time,"  the  old  man  continued, 
46  dat  I  tuck  notice  she  'uz  gwine  wrong.    Dea 


334         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FMIENDS. 

she  tuck'n  j'inded  deze  yer  Breedin'  Dove  en 
Rastlin'  Jacob  S'ciety.  Den  she  tuck  er 
notion  dat  she  bleed  z  to  sen'  William  Henry 
to  school  —  a  great  big  boy  like  dat.  But 
William  Henry,  he  bin  stayin'  at  my  house 
mos'  much  ez  he  is  at  home,  en  me  en  my  ole 
'oman  done  Tarn  'im  some  sense.  Wid  me, 
a  nigger  is  done  gradjywated  de  minnit  you 
puts  de  plough  handles  in  his  han's,  en  dat  ar 
William  Henry  plenty  big  fer  ter  be  follerin' 
de  plough  right  now.  De  nex'  time  I  see  Lu- 
cindy  —  Yander  he  is  right  now  !  "  exclaimed 
Uncle  Remus.  He  had  caught  sight  of  Wil- 
liam Henry  coming  through  the  gate.  "  Come 
yer,  you  triflin'  rascal !  en  fetch  dat  ar  bar'l 
hoop  wid  you.  Whar  you  bin  ?  Don't  you 
come  walkin'  up  yer  wid  yo'  hat  on.  I  '11 
jump  on  you,  mon,  en  tromple  you.  Come 
yer,  suh,  en  tell  yo'  Miss  Sally  howdy.  Whar 
yo'  manners?" 

William  Henry,  an  unusually  bright  and 
pleasant-looking  negro  boy,  came  up  the  walk, 
shining  his  white  teeth  and  swinging  himself 
with  the  vigor  of  youth.  He  wore  on  his 
smiling  face  an  expression  of  mingled  intelli- 
gence, shrewdness,  and  mischievousness. 

"Howdy,  Miss  Sally;  howdy,  daddy,"  he 
said,  taking  off  his  hat. 


WILLIAM  HENRY  AT  SCHOOL.  335 

"  You  well  ter  say  howdy  !  "  exclaimed  Un- 
cle Remus,  with  a  great  affectation  of  anger. 
u  You  kin  say  yo'  pra'rs  en  thank  yo'  stars 
dat  yo'  Miss  Sally  out  yer  whar  she  kin  pertec' 
you,  kaze  ef  I  had  you  out  by  yo'se'f,  I  lay 
I  'd  bust  you  wide  open.  What  kinder  way 
is  dish  yer  you  got,  playin'  de  runaway 
nigger  c 

William  Henry  swung  his  hat  from  side  to 
side,  and  looked  at  everything  in  sight  except 
Uncle  Remus.    He  was  evidently  embarrassed. 

"Have  you  been  running  away,  William 
Henry?  "  asked  Miss  Sally. 

"  Yes  'm,"  said  William  Henry.  "  I  been 
stayin'  'way  fum  my  mammy  an'  pappy,  but 
I  ain't  been  runnin'  'way  fum  daddy  dar. 
Daddy  know  I  ain't  been  hidin'  fum  him, 
'cause  how  come  I  'm  here,  ef  I  bin  hidin'  fum 
nn?" 

"  Why  did  you  run  away  ?  "  asked  the  lady. 

"  Hoi'  up  yer  head,  nigger,  en  make  answer 
ter  Miss  Sally  when  she  ax  you ! "  exclaimed 
Uncle  Remus,  as  the  boy  hesitated. 

"  Mammy  took  an'  tol'  me  dat  I  got  to  go 
to  school,"  said  William  Henry,  "  an'  she 
know  all  de  time  I  dunner  nothin'  't  all  'bout 
no  books.     Den  pappy,  he  say  I  got  to  go, 


886  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

an'  he  took  an'  went  wid  me.  De  nigger  man 
what  wus  teaching  he  gimme  er  book  an'  tol' 
me  wharbouts  to  set  at.  I  sot  dar  an'  done 
des  like  de  balance  un  um." 

"  Did  you  study  any  ?"  asked  Miss  Sally. 

"  Yes  'm,  I  'speck  so,"  said  William  Henry* 
'tC  De  teacher  wuz  a  chunky  little  nigger,  an* 
eve'y  time  he  turn  his  back  de  yuthers  would 
cut  up,  an'  den  when  he  'd  turn  'roun'  dey  'd  be 
a-lookin'  in  der  books.  Dat  de  way  I  done. 
Bimeby  de  teacher  call  me  up  an'  ax  me  kin  I 
read,  an'  I  say,  '  No,  suh,  'cause  it  make  my 
head  ache.'  Den  he  ax  me  to  read  some,  an' 
I  say  I  got  de  headache  right  den.  He  look 
at  de  book  an'  say  she  's  upperside  down.  I 
say,  l  Yasser,  I  'speck  she  is.'  He  say,  c  How 
you  gwine  read  dat  away  ?  '  an'  I  say,  I  wan't 
^wine  read  dat  away.  He  ax  me  what  I  gwine 
do,  an'  I  say,  I  dunno  what  I  gwine  do. 
He  ax  me  ef  I  kin  read  wid  books  upperside 
down,  an'  I  say  not  at  de  time  when  I  got  de 
headache.  Den  he  tell  me  to  turn  de  book 
'roun'  an'  go  set  down." 

"  You  hear  dat,  Miss  Sally ! "  exclaimed 
Uncle  Eemus  in  an  exultant  tone.  "  Dat 
what  deze  town  niggers  call  teachin'  school/' 

"  Yes  'm,"    said  William  Henry,  growing 


WILLIAM  HENRY  AT  SCHOOL.  337 

more  confident.  "  Dat  man  toP  me  ter  go  set 
down,  an'  I  went  an*  sot  down.  Bimeby  he 
come  'long  an'  say  my  book  is  upperside 
down,  an'  he  ax  me  how  come  she  upperside 
down.  I  say  I  dunno,  'ceppin'  she  one  er 
dem  kinder  books  what  stays  upperside  down. 
Den  he  took  an'  lam  me  side  de  head." 

"  I  wish  ter  de  Lord  I  'd  V  bin  dar,"  said 
Uncle  Remus. 

"  I  had  a  rock  in  my  pocket/'  continued 
William  Henry,  "  an'  when  he  went  struttin' 
off  I  upped  wid  it  an'  hit  'im  a  clip  right  'pon 
top  de  head.  Den  I  made  a  break  fer  de  do* 
an'  run'd  off." 

"  Whar  you  bin  since  den  ?  "  asked  Uncle 
Remus. 

"  I  bin  waitin'  in  a  bod'in'  house,"  said  the 
boy. 

"  How  come  you  ain't  dar  now  ?  " 

u  'Cause  dey  had  batter  cakes  fer  brekkus 
dis  mornin',  an'  de  lady  say  dat  two  un  um 
wuz  missin',  an'  soon  's  dey  got  to  talkin'  dat 
away  I  say  I  gwine  to  see  daddy,  'cause  1 
know'd  dey  wuz  gwine  to  lay  it  on  me.  It  de 
fust  time  I  ever  is  see  folks  count  de  batte; 
cakes." 

"  Look  yer,  boy,"  exclaimed  Uncle  R^mus, 


338         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

as  his  Miss  Sally  went  into  the  house  laughing, 
"  you  go  on  ter  my  house  en  tell  yo'  granny 
I  sont  you,  en  ef  Lucindy  come  dar  atter  you, 
you  tell  'er  I  'm  gwine  ter  larn  'er  some  sense. 
Go  on  now  !  " 


XIX. 

UNCLE    REMUs's    GRANDSON    GETS   INTO   SERi 
OUS    TROUBLE. 

"Miss  Sally/'  said  Uncle  Remus,  as  he 
came  around  the  corner  of  the  house,  leading 
William  Henry,  his  grandson,  by  the  coat  col- 
lar, "  is  Mars  John  gone  down  town  yit  ?  " 

"  Long  ago,"  said  the  lady.  "  Why,  it 's 
after  eight  o'clock." 

"  Now,  ain't  dat  too  bad  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle 
Remus.  "  I  bleedz  ter  see  Mars  John,  but  ef 
I  starts  down  town  wid  dish  yer  young  vilyun, 
dey  '11  take  'im  away  fum  me  en  put  'im  in 
de  chain-gang  'fo'  I  kin  git  out'n  sight  er  de 
house.  Dey  er  atter  'im  right  now  —  I  des 
knows  dey  is.    Dey  er  bleedz  ter  be  atter  'im." 

William  Henry  was  the  picture  of  despair. 
All  he  could  do  was  to  whimper  and  cry, 
"  Don't  let  'em  git  me,  daddy  —  don't  let  'em 
git  me." 

"What  is  the  matter  with  the  child?" 
asked  the  lady. 


840         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  You  call  'im  chile,  Miss  Sally  ?  "  exclaimed 
Uncle  Eemus.  "  He  older  in  sin  dan  ole  man 
Methuselum.  Miss  Sally,  you  don't  know 
nothin'  't  all  'bout  dat  nigger.  He  's  rank  pi- 
zen.  He  des  got  enough  er  de  new  issue  nig- 
ger in  'im  fer  ter  sen'  'im  fum  de  calaboose 
ter  de  chain-gang,  en  fum  de  chain-gang  ter 
de  gallus." 

"  But  what  has  he  been  doing  ?  "  the  lady 
inquired,  with  some  interest.  She  had  n't  seen 
Uncle  Remus  so  thoroughly  wrought  up  in 
many  a  long  day. 

"I  declar'  ter  gracious,  Miss  Sally,"  said 
the  old  man,  with  emphasis,  "  'twixt  what  I 
knows,  en  dat  what  I  bin  hear  talk  un,  en  dat 
what  I  'spicions,  I  could  set  right  flat  on  de 
groun'  here  en  take  up  yo'  time  fer  mighty 
nigh  a  whole  week  tellin'  you  'bout  de  doin's 
er  dish  yer  nigger.  I  done  seed  all  kinder 
niggers  endurin'  er  my  day  en  time,  but  dis 
is  de  mos'  outdoinest,  owdacious  nigger  what 
I  ever  is  come  'cross.  Straighten  up  here, 
you  wall-eyed  Affikin,  'fo'  I  jump  on  you  en 
tromple  you ! "  This  was  addressed  to  the 
shrinking  and  penitent  William  Henry. 

"  Turn  him  loose  and  stop  jerking  him 
around,"  said  the  lady.    "  Can't  you  tell  me 


UNCLE  BEMUS'S  GBANDSON.  341 

wfiat  he  has  done  ?  "  The  serious,  almost  se- 
vere tone  of  the  lady  subdued  Uncle  Kemus's 
violence  somewhat. 

"  Well,  you  know,  Miss  Sally,  when  dat  ar 
nigger  comeded  up,  out  dar  in  de  front  yard, 
atter  he  bin  run  away  f um  school  ?  Dat  bin 
mo'  dan  a  fortnight  ago.  I  tuck  dat  boy  out 
dar  te'r  side  er  Wes'  Een',  out  dar  whar  Mr. 
Bill  Baxter  keep  a  dairy,  en  I  got  'im  in  dar. 
Mr.  Baxter  say  he  look  like  he  's  a  likely  boy, 
en  he  say  he  '11  take  'im  in  en  gin  'im  a  show- 
in'  —  much  on  account  er  knowin'  me  so  long 
ez  on  account  er  wantin'  de  boy. 

"  Wellum,  dat  sorter  sot  me  up.  Dey  wuz 
Ian'  dar  whar  he  could  plough  en  hoe,  en  room 
enough  out  dar  f  er  'im  ter  1'arn  mo'  sense  in  a 
week  dan  what  he  kin  Farn  in  deze  yer  nigger 
schools  in  sev'm  year.  He  had  eve'ything  ter 
his  han'  —  ash-cake  en  dumplin's  ter  eat,  en 
pot-licker  en  buttermilk  ter  drink.  I  cum  off 
en  lef  'im  dar,  en  it  make  me  feel  mighty 
proud  dat  he  wuz  dar. 

"  It  look  like  de  people  wuz  made  ter  fit  'im. 
I  wuz  gwine  'long  'cross  town,  en  I  hear  some- 
body holler  at  me,  en  dar  wuz  William  Henry 
a-drivin'  de  milk  waggin,  en  I  say  ter  myse'f 
dat  he  dun  fix,  sho.     It  went  along  dis  away 


342  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

twel  dis  mornin,  —  en  dar  de  town  nigger 
showed  off  agin'.  He  flung  all  de  fat  in  de 
fier,  en  I  wish  ter  de  Lord  he  'd  'a'  jumpt  in 
atter  it.  Stan'  up  dar,  suh,  en  tell  yo'  Miss 
Sally  what  you  tole  me,  ef  you  got  de  face 
ter  do  it,  en  I  know  you  is,  kaze  you  er  town 
nigger,  born  en  bred." 

"  Tell  me  about  it,  William  Henry,"  ob- 
served the  lady,  in  a  tone  at  once  kind  and 
reassuring.  "  I  hope  you  have  n't  killed  any- 
body." 

"  No  'm,  I  ain't.  Daddy  done  got  me  skeer'd, 
an'  I  'speck  I  is  been  mighty  bad,  but  it  all 
happen  'long  des  like  somebody  done  fix  it  up 
on  me.  I  done  hurted  a  white  man's  feelin's, 
an'  I  'speck  Mr.  Baxter  milk  waggin  done  all 
broke,  but  de  Lord  knows  it  wan't  me  done  it 
myse'f." 

"  Tell  me  about  it,"  said  the  lady. 

"  Wellum,  Mr.  Baxter,  he  ax  me  kin  I  drive 
de  milk  waggin,  an'  I  say  yasser,  I  'speck  I  kin, 
'ceppin'  de  mule  run'd  away,  an'  dey  wan't  no- 
body could  drive  a  mule  whilst  he  runnin' 
away.  Mr.  Baxter  say  all  right,  an'  de  fust 
mornin'  er  two  he  went  'long  wid  me.  De 
mule  wuz  done  trained.  Time  he  struck  town, 
he  know  de  way  he  oughter  go,  an'  eve'y  tim© 


UNCLE  REMU&S  GRANDSON.  343 

he  stop,  dar  wuz  de  place  ter  ring  de  bell,  an' 
de  folks  would  come  out  an'  git  de  milk,  an' 
time  de  mule  'ud  hear  me  hand  de  medjin' 
cup  back  on  de  can,  he  'd  des  switch  his  tail 
an'  so  on.  Look  like  I  never  is  to  have  so 
much  fun  —  up  dar  drivin'  by  myse'f ,  an'  ain't 
need  to  hoF  de  lines  skacely. 

il  Well,  dis  mornin'  when  we  start  out,  it 
wuz  plum  dark.  I  dunner  wherrer  it  wuz  be- 
kaze  we  come  out  sooner,  er  wherrer  it 's  be- 
kaze  it 's  so  cloudy,  bat  'fo'  we  got  ter  whar 
de  street  lamps  wuz,  I  could  n't  see  de  mule's 
tail,  an'  de  fog  des  rolled  aroun'  in  great 
big  chunks.  We  went  'long,  an'  we  got  mos' 
done,  an'  bimeby  we  got  to  de  place  whar  dey  's 
a  great  big  fat  cook,  an'  she  come  out  an'  got 
her  milk,  an'  went  back  growlin'  like  she  always 
do. 

"  Den  it  look  like  I  hear  somebody  talkin' 
on  de  yuther  side  de  waggin,  an'  I  turn'  roun'> 
an'  dar  I  see  a  white  man  holdin'  up  a  tin 
pitcher  er  sump'n'.  I  ax  'im  how  much  he 
svant,  an'  it  look  to  me  like  he  say  he  want  a 
quart.  So  I  drawed  de  milk  an'  retched  over 
an'  poured  it  in  de  pitcher.  I  thought  de  man 
Wuz  holdin'  it  mighty  funny. 

"Wellum,  dat  ar  white  man  jump  up  ar/ 


344  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

down  out  dar  in  de  road  an'  squall  des  liko 
sump'n'  n'er  hurtin'  him.  I  look  at  him  right 
eloste,  an'  I  seed  dat  I  done  poured  de  whole 
quart  er  milk  in  one  er  deze  here  year-trum- 
pets what  deff  folks  sticks  in  der  years." 

Here  the  lady  laughed  so  heartily  that  it 
was  some  time  before  William  Henry  could 
go  on. 

"  Yessum.  He  capered  about  out  dar  in  de 
road,  an'  he  tuck  a  notion  dat  I  done  it  on 
a  purpose.  He  danced  to'rds  de  waggin  an' 
made  a  grab  fer  me,  but  I  lit  out  in  de  road, 
an'  de  mule  trotted  off,  an'  I  come  on  an'  tole 
daddy,  an'  daddy  he  say  it 's  de  ruination  er  de 
worl'  fer  ter  pour  fresh  milk  in  a  year-trumpet, 
an'  I  'speck  it  is,  kaze  I  ain't  never  hear  er 
anybody  else  doin'  it." 

"  Cose  you  kin  laugh,  Miss  Sally,"  said  Un- 
cle Remus  in  a  dejected  tone,  "  but  't  ain't 
no  laughin'  matter  wid  me  an'  wid  dish  yer 
mizerbul  nigger  here." 

"Fiddlesticks ! "  exclaimed  the  lady.  " There 
is  no  harm  done.  Send  William  Henry  back 
to  Mr.  Baxter.  Tell  him  how  it  all  was,  and 
tell  him  I  '11  take  milk  from  him  hereafter  if 
William  Henry  is  going  to  drive." 

"  Yessum !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus,  enthu- 


UNCLE  REMU&S  GRANDSON,  345 

siastically.  "  Ain't  dey  no  harm  done,  Miss 
Sally?" 

"  Not  the  slightest,"  said  the  lady. 

"  Well,  I  thank  God  fer  date  Come  on, 
nigger  boy  1 " 


XX. 

THE    EXPERIENCE    OF    WILLIAM    HENRY    AS    A 
FARMER. 

When  Uncle  Eemus  made  his  appearance 
one  morning  for  the  purpose  of  putting  his 
Miss  Sally's  flower  garden  to  rights  after  the 
heavy  rains,  he  brought  William  Henry,  his 
grandson,  with  him. 

"He  sech  a  no  'count  nio^er  he  can't  do 
much,"  said  the  old  man,  "  but  he  kin  sorter 
scratch  in  de  groun'  wid  dish  yere  hoe,  en 
he  '11  be  here  whar  I  kin  knock  'im  in  de  head 
ef  he  des  so  much  ez  bat  his  eyes  crooked." 

"  Why,  I  thought  he  went  back  to  the  dairy 
business,"  said  the  lady.  "  Did  n't  the  dairy- 
man take  him  back  after  he  had  the  trouble 
with  the  deaf  man  ?  " 

"  Oh,  yessum !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus. 
"  Oh,  yessum,  he  tuck  'im  back ;  but  dat  ain't 
do  no  good.  He  got  town  nigger  blood  in 
W,  dat  boy  is,  en  he  ain't  never  gwine  res' 
sati'fied  twel  he  git  in  de  chain-gang.  Hit 
done  proned  in  'im." 


WILLIAM  HENRY  AS  A  FARMER.  317 

"  What  was  the  matter,  William  Henry  ?  " 
the  lady  asked. 

"  Hoi'  up  yo'  head,  nigger,  en  talk  ter  Miss 
Sally,  'fo'  I  bus'  you  wide  open  wid  dis  hoe 
helve  !  "  exclaimed  Uncle  Remus. 

"  Wellum,"  said  William  Henry,  with  an 
embarrassed  air,  "  de  man  tuck  me  back,  but 
he  say  I  can't  drive  de  milk  waggin  no  mo', 
'cause  I  let  de  muel  git  away  dat  time ;  an* 
den  he  sot  me  ter  feedin'  an'  watchin'  de 
stock.  Countin'  of  de  horses  an'  muels,  dey 
wuz  mighty  nigh  forty  cows  ter  feed,  an'  by 
de  time  you  do  dat  two  times  a  day,  wid  de 
calfs  a-buttin'  you  on  de  legs  an'  de  cows 
a-hunchin'  you  wid  dey  horns,  you  'd  git 
mighty  lonesome.  Dat  de  way  it  done  me. 
Dey  ain't  no  town  out  dar.  All  you  kin  do 
atter  you  git  froo  yo'  work  is  ter  set  on  de 
fence  an'  listen  at  de  trains  a-whistlin'." 

"  Miss  Sally,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  "  what  I 
tell  you  'bout  dat  town  nigger?  Talk  up, 
boy,  en  tell  de  trufe.  Don't  be  hatchin'  no 
tales." 

"I  ain't  hatchin'  no  tales,  daddy,"  said 
William  Henry.  "  I  'm  tellin'  Miss  Sally  de 
Lord's  trufe,  'cause  I  'speck  she  know  how  't  is 
when  you  git  'way  off  dar  in  de  country  whar 


348  BIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

de  whipperwills  fly  right  in  yo'  face  an'  holler. 
Yit  dat  ain't  what  make  me  come  back.  I 
don't  keer  nothin'  't  all  'bout  bein'  lonesome, 
'specially  when  I  ain't  hongry,  an'  dat  man 
eert'n'y  gimme  plenty  bread  an'  meat." 

"  What  was  the  trouble,  then  ? "  the  lady 
inquired,  with  some  curiosity. 

"  Why  n't  you  talk  up,  nigger,  when  Miss 
Sally  ax  you  ?  " 

"Wellum,"  said  William  Henry,  "  dey  wuz 
a  pastur'  whar  we  turned  in  de  muels  at  night, 
an'  ane'r  pastur'  whar  we  turned  in  de  steers 
an'  de  dry  cattle.  De  cows,  dey  wuz  put  up 
in  de  barn.  One  day  des  'bout  sundown, 
atter  I  done  put  all  de  stock  whar  dey  b'longed 
at,  one  er  de  steers  got  over  dar  whar  de  muels 
wuz.  Time  I  could  git  in  clar,  de  muels  got 
atter  de  steer,  an'  dey  run'd  'im  'roun'  like 
dey  wuz  gwine  ter  eat  'im  up  ef  dey  kotch 
'im.  I  got  in  dar,  an'  I  tried  to  shoo  um  off, 
but  time  dat  steer  see  me  he  make  right  at 
me,  an'  'fo'  I  kin  dodge  'im  he  run'd  right 
spang  over  me.  I  shot  my  eyes  an'  tried  ter 
say  some  Bible  word,  but  befo'  I  kin  make  my 
min'  work  dey  had  me  down,  an'  muels  an'  all 
had  done  run'd  right  over  me.  De  steer,  he 
stumpled  an'  fell  atter  he  done  run'd  over  me; 


WILLIAM  HENRY  AS  A  FARMER.  349 

an'  de  two  muels  turned  somersets  right  'pon 
top  un  'im. 

"  Wellum,  I  ain't  never  seed  nothin'  like 
dat,  an'  it  make  me  feel  like  I  wuz  dreamin' ; 
but  't  wan't  no  dream,  'cause  dar  dey  lay, 
kickin'  an'  groanin',  an'  dar  wuz  my  jacket 
on  de  steer's  horns,  an'  one  er  de  muels  had 
my  hat  brim  on  his  hine  leg.  No  'm,  't  wan't 
no  dream.  De  man  hear  de  racket,  an'  he 
come  runnin'  an'  ax  me  what  de  name  er 
goodness  is  de  matter.  But  I  ain't  pay  no 
'tention ;  I  des  stood  dar  an'  gouge  de  dirt 
outen  my  eyes  an'  outen  my  years. 

"  You  know  how  muels  is,  'm.  When  you 
once  git  'em  hacked  dey  er  hacked  fer  good ; 
dey  des  give  right  up  en  roll  der  eyes.  Dat 
wuz  de  way  wid  dem  muels.  Dey  wuz  plum 
hacked.  Dey  des  lay  dar  an'  roll  der  eyes  an' 
grunt  like  sick  folks.  De  steer,  he  sorter  paw 
'roun'  an'  try  ter  git  up,  but  one  er  de  muels 
wuz  layin'  right  cross-ways  on  'im.  Den  de 
man  look  at  me  right  hard  an'  ax  is  I  do  all 
dat.  I  say  yasser.  Den  he  ax  how  come  so, 
an'  I  say  de  muels  an'  de  steer  done  run'd 
over  me.  He  ax  wuz  I  hurted  anywhar,  an'  I 
sav  I  wan't  hurted  nowhar  much  but  in  de 
feelin's,  'cause  I  hate  ter  be  trompled  on." 


350  HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

"  Were  the  mules  hurt  ?  "  asked  the  lady. 

"  No  'm  !  "  exclaimed  William  Henry,  in  a 
tone  which  implied  his  belief  that  not  even  a 
blast  of  dynamite  could  hurt  a  mule,  "dey 
want  nothin'  't  all  de  matter  wid  'em.  De  steer 
might  er  been  bruised  up  some,  but  dem  muels 
did  n't  had  a  scratch  on  'em. 

"  Wellum,  de  man  might  er  been  mad,  but  he 
look  mo'  like  he  wuz  skeer'd.  I  toP  'im,  I  say., 
6  Daddy  want  me  ter  come  out  here  an'  l'arn 
how  ter  be  a  farmer,  but  ef  dis  what  you  call 
farmin'  I  don't  want  ter  git  in  de  habits  er 
bein'  a  farmer.'  An'  den  I  ax  'im  ter  gimme 
'nough  bread  ter  walk  home  on." 

"  Now,  you  hear  all  dat,  don't  you,  Miss 
Sally  ?  "  said  Uncle  Kemus,  as  William  Henry 
paused.  "  Ef  eve'ybody  wuz  votin'  fer  'im, 
he  could  n't  be  gwine  no  straighter  ter  de 
chain-gang.  He  's  a  town  nigger,  an'  he 
bleedz  ter  go  dar." 


XXL 

THE    GEORGIA   WATERMELON. 

The  weather  was  very  warm  —  hot,  in  fact. 
The  sun  shone  down  with  blistering  effect  on 
the  tops  of  the  houses,  and  on  the  pavements 
that  were  not  protected  by  the  friendly  awn- 
ings. Yet,  hot  as  it  was,  Uncle  Remus  sat 
contentedly  on  a  platform  used  by  the  railroad 
as  a  temporary  depository  for  bulky  freight. 
He  was  sitting  in  the  full  glare  of  the  sun, 
and  there  was  not  a  breath  of  air  stirring. 
The  old  man  seemed  to  be  comfortable,  for, 
although  he  had  his  hat  off,  he  was  not  fan- 
ning with  it.  He  was  gazing  intently  on  a 
freight  car  standing  on  the  track  not  far  off. 
It  was  what  is  called  a  ventilated  car,  and  was 
full  of  watermelons.  While  Uncle  Remus  was 
examining  the  car  with  wistful  eyes,  a  negro, 
evidently  employed  about  the  railroad  yard, 
came  shuffling  along,  after  the  manner  of 
negroes  who  desire  to  make  a  show  of  being 
very  busy.  He  knew  Uncle  Remus,  and  so 
he  cried  out :  — 


352         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

"  Howdy,  Brer  Remus !  How  yer  come 
on?" 

"  Middlin'  peart,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  turn- 
ing to  look  at  the  negro.  "  I  ain't  ez  sick  ez 
I  mought  be,  an'  yet  I  ain't  ez  well  ez  I  wish 
I  wuz.     How  you  do  ?  " 

u  Des  kinder  tollable,"  replied  the  other, 
with  a  sigh.  "  Dey  keeps  me  so  busy  'roun' 
here  dat  I  ain't  got  time  to  do  much  but  com- 
plain." 

"  How  come  you  so  busy  ? "  asked  Uncle 
Remus.  "  I  bin  had  one  eye  on  you  since  I 
bin  settin'  here,  an'  I  ain't  seed  you  do  nuffin' 
yit.     How  come  dat  ?  " 

"  I  bin  up  dar  waitin'  f  er  der  boss  ter  come," 
said  the  other,  "  an'  now  he  done  come,  I  'm 
a-gwine  down  here  whar  he  '11  hatter  sen'  atter 
me  when  he  want  me.  I  'm  gwine  ter  rustle 
roun'  an'  see  ef  I  can't  git  me  a  watermil- 
lion." 

"  Dey 's  a  whole  kyar  full  un  um,"  remarked 
Uncle  Remus,  sententiously. 

"  Dat  kyar  locked,"  said  the  other. 

"  What  kinder  millions  is  dey  ? "  Uncle 
Remus  asked. 

"  Dey  come  from  some'rs  way  off  yander/' 
said  the  other  negro. 


THE  GEORGIA  WATERMELON.  353 

"Dat  what  I  lowed/'  said  Uncle  Remus. 
u  Dish  yere  's  de  fust  week  in  June,  an'  dough 
de  sun  gittin'  sorter  warm  and  thankful  when 
you  set  right  down  and  let  it  take  good  aim 
at  you,  yit  't  ain't  time  fer  no  state  er  Georgy 
watermillions.  Not  whar  I  come  fum.  Down 
dar  in  middle  Georgy,  ef  you  got  a  good  ripe 
watermillion  'fo'  de  fofe  er  July,  you  wuz 
doin'  mighty  well." 

"  Law,"  said  the  other,  "  it  done  got  so 
now  dat  dey  'gin  ter  come  in  'fo'  de  fros'  git 
out  de  groun'  good." 

"  Dem  yander  millions,"  said  Uncle  Remus, 
gazing  at  the  freight  car  with  half -closed  eyes, 
"  is  cert'n'y  got  de  ole-time  look  'bout  um.  I 
look  at  um  des  now,  an'  seem  like  I  kin  smell 
de  Maypop  blossom." 

"  I  wish  you  'd  hush,  Brer  Remus  !  "  ex* 
claimed  the  other  negro,  laughing. 

"  Yasser !  an  it  look  like  I  kin  see  de 
millions  shinin'  in  de  grass  in  de  cool  er  de 
mornin',  an'  it  look  like  dey  ain't  nobody 
watchin'  'cept'n'  a  red-headed  woodpecker  in 
de  top  uv  a  dead  pine." 

"  Oh,  go  'way,  Brer  Remus  !  You  er  gittin' 
me  all  stirred  up  ;  an  what  good  it  gwine  do, 
ef  all  deze  yer  million  kyars  is  locked  up  ?  " 


354         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FBIENDS. 

"Dem  ar  watermillions,"  continued  Uncle 
Remus,  smacking  his  lips,  "mought  be  ez 
green  on  de  inside  ez  dey  is  on  de  outside,  yit 
dey  looks  des  'zackly  like  dem  what  we  useter 
raise  on  de  Oconee.  I  dunner  whar  dey  come 
fum,  but  dey  sholy  is  got  de  right  kinder 
streaks  on  um." 

"  Dat  ar  kyar,"  said  the  other  negro,  ex- 
amining some  mysterious  chalk  marks  on  the 
sides,  u  come  fum  Albenny." 

"  Wharbouts  is  Albenny  ? "  asked  Uncle 
Remus,  with  a  frown. 

"  Down  de  country,"  said  the  other,  with  a 
sweeping  gesture  that  took  in  at  least  two 
points  of  the  compass. 

"  She 's  in  de  Nunited  State  er  Georgy," 
exclaimed  Uncle  Remus,  "dat  whar  she  is. 
Kaze  my  young  marster  had  a  plantation 
down  dar." 

"  Dey  tells  me,"  said  the  other  negro,  "  dat 
de  wedder  down  dar  starts  in  ter  warmin'  up 
terreckerly  atter  Christmus." 

"  Hit  bleedz  ter  be  so,"  said  Uncle  Remus, 
"  bekaze  it  takes  hot  wedder  an'  a  heap  un  it 
fer  ter  git  de  right  kinder  sweetness  on  de  in- 
side uv  a  water  million.  An'  't  ain't  only  dat  — 
't  ain't  only  de  sun  what  gits  it  in  dar.    When 


THE  GEORGIA  WATERMELON .  355 

I  come  an*  ax  you  fer  to  please  be  so  good 
ez  ter  gimme  a  watermillion,  don't  you  dast  ter 
gimme  no  yuther  kind  'cep'n  de  ginnywine 
kind  what  got  de  natal  sweetness  proned  inter 
it  fum  de  middle  plum  down  ter  de  rine." 

"  I  wish  you  'd  hush !  "  said  the  other  ne- 
gro, shutting  his  eyes  tight  and  grinning. 

"  Hit  des  like  I  tell  you/'  said  Uncle  Re- 
mus. "  Some  er  doze  yer  yuther  niggers,  dey 
er  runnin'  'roun'  all  over  creation,  gwine  out 
ter  Massasip'  an'  down  de  Alabam',  but  I 
boun'  you  I  'm  a-gwine  ter  stay  whar  I  kin  git 
de  ginnywine  state  er  Georgy  watermillion 
when  de  season  come  ,roun,.,, 

"  I  'clar'  ter  gracious,  Brer  Remus,  you 
make  me  feel  right  quare." 

"I  don't  wanter  be  whar  I'll  hatter  buy 
um,  needer,"  said  Uncle  Remus,  paying  no 
attention  to  the  other  negro's  remark.  "  I 
wanter  be  whar  I  kin  go  'long  de  road  soon 
in  de  mornin'  an'  make  like  I  'm  huntin'  a  cow 
what  strayed  off.  Den,  atter  I  been  gwine 
'long  de  road  so  long  a  time,  maybe  I  '11  take 
a  notion  fer  to  take  a  nigh  cut,  an'  den  I  '11 
clime  de  fence  an'  santer  'long  thoo  de  fiel's, 
an'  keep  on  twel  bimeby  I  '11  come  'long  ter 
whar  de  crab-grass  sorter   growin'   rank.     I 


356         HIS  HOME  FOLKS  AND  FRIENDS. 

won't  min'  de  dew,  kaze  what  does  a  little 
dew  'mount  ter,  mo'  speshually  when  a  man  is 
gwine  'long  huntin'  a  stray  cow  ?  " 

The  other  negro  stood  listening  to  Uncle 
Remus  with  open  mouth. 

"  I  '11  go  'long  twel  I  come  ter  de  rank  crab- 
grass,  an'  den  I  '11  'low  ter  myse'f ,  c  Hey !  what 
all  dish  yere  grass  doin'  here  ?  Look  like  some- 
body done  plant  sump'n'  here  an'  den  gone  off 
an'  lef  um.  Den  bimeby  I  '11  see  sump'n 
n'er  in  de  grass  dat  look  roun'  an'  green  an' 
slick,  wid  little  draps  er  dew  on  it  des  like  glass 
beads.  Den  I  '11  stop  an'  hoi'  up  my  han's 
an'  say,  '  Whoever  is  see  de  beat  er  dat  ?  Man 
come  'long  an'  plant  big  watermillion  patch, 
an'  den  go  off  an'  lef  um.'  Den  I  '11  sorter 
poke  roun'  in  de  grass  wid  my  cane  twel  I 
come  'cross  a  great  big  million  wid  streaks 
on  'im  like  rattlesnake,  an'  den  I  '11  thump  'er 
an'  ef  she  holler  back  at  me  like  she  full,  I  '11 
set  down  right  flat  er  de  groun'  and  bus'  'er 
wid  my  fist." 

The  listening  negro  moved  a  little  nearer. 

"  Yasser,"  continued  Uncle  Remus,  "  dat 
des  what  I  'd  do.  I  would  n't  be  grievin'  kaze 
I  ain't  got  no  comp'ny,  but  ef  dey  wuz  any- 
body settin'  off  in  de  grass  watchin'  me,  dey  'd 
see  a  sight,  man. 


THE  GEORGIA  WATERMELON.  357 

€t  Dey  'd  see  me  run  my  han'  down  inter  de 
meat  des  like  a  scoop,  an'  fetch  myse'f  a  swipe 
'cross  de  face,  an*  den  dey  'd  hear  me  smack 
my  mouf  like  a  wagon-driver  poppin'  a  whip. 

"  Yasser  !  dey  'd  see  all  dat,  an'  de  mo'  dey  'd 
see  er  my  motions  de  less  dey  'd  see  er  de 
watermillion.  I  'd  fergit  all  'bout  de  cow,  an' 
den  I  'd  make  my  way  back  home  an'  set  in 
de  sun  an'  nod.  I  'd  nod  ef  de  bummel-eye 
bee  did  n't  git  me,  kaze  I  'd  have  mo'  sweet- 
ness en  me  fum  de  juice  er  de  watermillion 
dan  one  er  deze  yer  sugar  hogsheads  what  sets 
out  in  front  er  de  country  stores. 

"  Yasser !  an'  ef  I  wuz  ter  eat  two  water- 
millions  an'  git  bilious,  I  'd  shuffle  up  town  an' 
git  me  "  — 

Here  Uncle  Remus  made  a  few  marks  in  the 
sand  with  his  cane  in  a  reflective  way. 

"  I  'd  git  me  a  thrip's  wuff  er  dram  en  den 
go  hunt  me  anudder  cow  some'rs." 

"  Brer  Remus,"  said  the  other  negro,  "  des 
wait  right  whar  you  is.  I  'm  gwine  ter  git 
a  watermillion.     I  des  bleedz  ter  have  it." 

"  Go  'long,  den,  honey,"  said  Uncle  Remus. 
'  When  you  talk  dat  away,  I  ain't  got  time  ter 
be  in  a  hurry." 


